


Second Chances

by fanfics4you



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Angst, Broken Up, CEO, CEOs, Divorced Olicity, F/F, F/M, Gen, Love, Married Life, Married Olicity, Pain, divorced, finding their way back, sorry about lauriver! its not that bad trust me, spouses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-12
Updated: 2017-06-14
Packaged: 2018-07-14 16:07:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 109,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7178945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanfics4you/pseuds/fanfics4you
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They were married once. Misunderstandings tore them apart.What do you do when life gives you a second chance? Do you take it or just let go?<br/>In which Oliver Queen is engaged to Laurel Lance but is falling for his ex wife Felicity Smoak.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! How are you all? 
> 
> Thank you for giving this fanfic a chance.
> 
> This fanfic is also on fanfiction.net where I started posting it initially where it is AHEAD by a couple of chapters. So if you want, you can always check it out there!   
> And I will be updating this frequently as well! 
> 
> Hope you all like it xD
> 
> Thank you! :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! 
> 
> Thank you for giving this fanfic a chance.
> 
> This entire fanfic is way ahead on fanfiction, where I initially started to post. I'll keep updating here too though. This site always seemed weird to me but fortunately, some people in this fandom helped me and here I am! :) 
> 
> If you guys want, you can always read it on fanfiction.net.
> 
> Enjoy! x 
> 
> Disclaimer : I don't own anything that seems familiar.

**_“Letting go doesn’t mean giving up, but rather accepting things that cannot be.”_ **

The hallway was almost silent and Felicity bit her lip as she walked through it, her feet moving across the shiny floor producing small thuds. Her heart was thumping in her chest as she clutched the ring tightly between her index finger and thumb. She almost felt like she was about to hyperventilate as tears collected in her eyes.

She didn’t know what convinced her to do this. For the past three years, it had been this ring she had clung to and it was because of it she hadn’t let herself fall in love again. She guessed it was because of John Diggle’s deep words that hit a nerve.

She stopped momentarily midway-the hallway leading to the eruption of so many memories in her mind. It was the hallway to his house- _their_ house. She shook her head-now that was in the past, she wouldn’t think of it, she _couldn’t_ think of it. She couldn’t let herself feel vulnerable again, she mused to herself as she resumed walking.

It was weird how during her worst times it was their memories that gave her the strength but now, all they brought was immense pain. She was grateful for the life she was given with him but now, watching him go-it _hurt_ and the irrational part of her brain hoped she wouldn’t have met him.

Each minute that passed, seemed like an hour while her pace seemed slow. She wanted to get away from this-to be away from _him_ because then only she can forget about him and carve a new life for herself.

Years ago, the idea didn’t appeal much to her but then, she didn’t have a choice-she had to leave him and she hoped that separation might have made her hate him, might have eradicated those strong feelings for him. The pain he made her go through might have erased that flame of love for him inside of her.

But who was she kidding? She finally had admitted to herself.

She was in love with him.

She always has been in love with him and coming back, she wanted to chuckle to herself-it was a stupid decision on her part, just brought them back. The tears peeked through the corner of her eyes as they finally dropped in twin sets.

_I love you, Felicity. I’m in love with you._

_This is our apartment, our home._

She just wanted to get rid of them, of him. She wanted to let go because no matter what, he would never be hers. Because no matter even if she hated him-

She couldn’t stop loving him.

Her panda flats moved against the floor as she stopped in front of the door. Removing her spectacles from her left hand, she rubbed her eyes, trying to remove the moisture. The ring for a moment fixated itself in her thumb as she blinked-hoping her eyes weren’t red. Giving her cheeks one final rub, she took a deep breath.

She could do this.

She had to let go.

She _needed_ to let go.

Wearing her specs-she knocked on the door. The words Oliver Queen were protruding in white, in contrast with the black door. She remembered when her name was etched their as well-and she wondered how long did it take Oliver to remove it?

Her thoughts had always gone tangentially and now, they were heading off in the wrong direction because at this point all she could think about was their memories-which was very wrong since all it was doing was causing her pain and she was indeed marking the end of it. She hoped this ring would be the end of it-returning it back meant that she was finally moving on with her life, alone-without him.

“Felicity?” His voice snapped her out of her thoughts and she couldn’t help but wonder if he would call her with the same intensity when he finally marries _her._

“Oliver,” She spoke, hoping her voice came out strong. A small grin took its place across her pale face-“I came here to-“

_“Ollie! Is that the pizza guy?”_

Felicity’s heart thudded. Of course she would be here. They were engaged, did she expect anything less? Her eyes were beginning to burn and she took a deep breath, “I just came here to return this.” She moved her right hand forward and his eyebrows hiked up. “Felicity-“ Before he could continue further, she shoved the ring in his hand. “I just came here to return it. Give it to Laurel,” She breathed-“She-she deserves it more.”

Oliver’s held tilted towards one side momentarily, his mouth parting open but Felicity cut him short-“Actually don’t. I mean, why would Laurel want my wedding ring? She would want a new one-“She spoke, “But you can give it to her if you want, I mean-it is yours now. I just came her to return it.” She knew she was about to enter he babble zone and this was the worst timing ever because any minute-she might burst and start crying. She just clutched her hands together and stared down on the ground.

“Felicity,” His voice was soft and she finally looked up. Her cobalt eyes meeting his blues. “This was yours. I can’t keep this-“ He was about to move his hand but Felicity stopped him, “No. Like you said we’re friends now, and I need to get rid of this-of our past.” She finally said the truth, “In order to begin a new relationship-we need to get rid of the old one.” She said with eventuality and Oliver felt his heart break as he stared at her.

Needing to get rid of it?

“Be happy Oliver,” She spoke softly, her voice breaking, “Don’t let her go.” She turned around-not giving him a chance to speak, afraid that his words might hold the power to convince her.

It was done.

She had finally let go of the thing that had her clung to the past.

She had accepted reality.

Laurel was his future, she was his past.

Laurel was his future wife, she was his ex-wife.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special shout out to Baz and Dani for helping me through this site! :)


	2. The Circle Of Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What is yours, will always come back to you.”

The circle of life. Felicity often wondered, why it was called a circle at the end of the day. People had given her a couple of answers-well, mostly _Google_ but what came out was that what has started will end at some point or what has gone-will at some point appear again in your life, sooner or later.

Or well, to it say it simply karma is a bitch. It catches up, always.

Not, that Felicity did anything bad. She didn’t have anything to be afraid of-but the circle of life was catching up to her. Her past was catching up to her.

…

The sun was shining brightly, adding distinct colours to the sky. It was crisp sky blue with certain shades a vermillion peeking through it like a small child behind the curtains. The clock struck ten thirty am in the morning and the occupant of the house leaned against the peach couch and sniffed loudly.

The lights weren’t switched on-the big glass window allowing the sun light to penetrate her house and light it up. The atmosphere was upbeat in one sense, but it really wasn’t. The news that the occupant had just received had shattered her and the surroundings didn’t help much.

She sobbed softly, a part of her hurt because of the news and another one shattered because no one cared enough to tell her. Her petite body shook as she leaned against her sofa. Rubbing a tissue against her red nose, she sniffed. Her knees were buckled as she hid her head, her spectacles discarded long ago, back in her bedroom. The lone tissue fell to the floor accompanying the others. She didn’t even make an effort to rub her cheeks, she knew the tears would keep on falling no matter what.

A soft knock echoed as Felicity frowned, looking up. She blinked, the water in her eyes didn’t pour down though. It was eleven am on a Sunday, usually no one graced her house at this time. Standing up, she wore her fuzzy slippers before walking across the small path that led to her white door. Pulling the skin on her cheeks she tried to remove the trace of tears before taking a deep breath. She really wanted to be left alone at this point and she really hoped that the person on the other side wouldn’t notice the cluster of tissues on her floor.

Opening the door, she was ready to open her mouth-when her eyes widened momentarily, “Ray?”

Ray Palmer grinned lightly before stepping aside a little bit. Behind him stood, Iris West and Barry Allen. “What-what are you guys doing here?” She spoke, her voice wavering-which didn’t really go unnoticed by her friends.

“Do we really need a reason to be here?” It was Barry who spoke, his signature smile on his face that made him look like a child. Iris stepped forward, her hands opening as she embraced the blonde, “Sweetie, we saw the news.” Her voice was soft like a mother comforting her child and for a split second, Felicity missed her mother too. Her hands rubbed across her back and she tried to stop crying but the tears just wouldn’t stop.

 She didn’t realise that the three had stepped inside-the door shutting promptly.

She didn’t know how long she cried.

 At this point time didn’t really seem to be an important factor to her, and her friends thought so too.

She cried-cried for the family she had lost and for the supposed family who didn’t care enough .God, why can’t she ever have a father? Unchecked tears poured down her cheeks as she sobbed her heart out. Iris’ hand rubbed her back while Ray clutched her hand firmly, sitting on the maroon settee that he had pulled from the other end of the room. Barry chose to sit on the other side of Felicity, the recently engaged couple embracing Felicity.

What felt like hours later, her sobs had turned into hiccups. Barry got up as he made a beeline towards the kitchen bringing a glass of water for his blonde friend. “Here,” He spoke softly-as Felicity pulled away from Iris before taking the glass and shooting Barry a grateful smile.  

“You okay now?” Ray asked softly and Felicity nodded. “Thank you.” She told her best friends, appreciative of their support. Deadly silence ensued for a split second as she placed the empty glass on the couch. No one knew what to say-afraid something might lead to a break down all over again.

 A sudden realisation dawned on Felicity as she looked at Ray, “How did you guys know, again?” She murmured, “The news. It’s all over it.” He answered, squeezing her hand when a small tear trickled down her cheek, “He died a week ago. No one informed me.” She said, her voice breaking.

This was what hurt the most. People back in Starling were aware of how close she was to Robert Queen. Growing up, she had been devoid of fatherly love and when she met _him-his_ father, he became her father. He became someone she looked up to and she called him _dad._ Initially, she thought that the word might seem foreign to her lips-but as it turned out, it wasn’t. Because he was her dad in every literal sense.

Even after she left Starling, he called her up to check on her. Sometimes he called Ray too-just to ask, what was up-because apparently, Felicity had a habit of not disclosing her problems. He thought she didn’t know, but she did. He supported her-

And now he was gone.

And as if the grief wasn’t enough, it was the fact that no one had the decency to call. If it hadn’t been for John-who Felicity was glad had called just to comfort her, only to discover that she wasn’t informed in the first place-she wouldn’t have known anything.

She knew they parted away at a sour note-but couldn’t he have called once? Ask someone else to do so?

“They didn’t call.” She spoke again as she cried, “I got to know along with the world, “ She leaned her head on Iris’ shoulder, “No one cared.”

The bell rung once again and this time it was Iris who got up. Opening the door-it was Courtney Palmer who stood on the other side, her hands in the air as she showed them the box of Dunkin Donuts she had bought along the way, “I come bearing gifts,” She said as she stepped inside.

Felicity smiled lightly as Barry spoke, “We will always care.”

Some people always care.

…

“Oliver,” The twenty nine year old looked up, his blue eyes looking at his friend, “Yes, Digg?” He spoke, pushing himself backwards as he stood. Reaching over, he switched off his computer before standing up.

“You didn’t tell her.” His words were crisp and to the point. This has always been his attitude and it was one of the qualities that he appreciated about him.

“I didn’t,” Oliver didn’t choose to elaborate further. He knew Digg was close to Felicity and he might have told her. Honestly, he had thought about calling her initially but then his thumb would just hover above her contact name, her beautiful smile enlightening his phone screen. There was a traitorous part of him that wanted to talk to her, to tell her, to just want to hear her voice while another just loathed her and he let the latter dominate. Even now, it was a matter of heart and mind.

No, he won’t call her just for him to get hurt further.

“She had the right to know, Oliver.” He looked at him, his arms crossed across his chest and Oliver chose that moment to escape the room-moving past him, “I figured out somebody else would tell her.”

Digg cursed under his breath, following him out of the room. Oliver stiffened momentarily but then relaxed, realising he wasn’t bringing the topic of her again.

“You are wrong, Oliver. That girl loved him and she deserved to know. Don’t you think after all that she has ever done for you, the least you could have done is call her?”

Needless to say, he was wrong.

Oliver bit back a growl-talking about her had always be his Achilles heel.  He turned around, his blue eyes looking up for a split second before he closed them momentarily though. Even now the thought of her, brought out emotions that he had buried a long time ago. “It hurts too much.” He said trying to shrug off the topic. They reached near the stairs and Diggle didn’t talk further, which Oliver was grateful for.

“Good, you two are here.” It was Moira Queen’s voice that snapped their attention. Oliver furrowed his eyebrows, a small part of him happy when he saw her. For the past one week, she wasn’t in the right state of mind, no one was as a matter of fact.

Robert Queen was a great man. Sure, Oliver would admit he had his fair share of flaws, but in the end-who doesn’t? He was a great father. And his death had been a shock and shook the Queen family to the core. He never thought his father would leave them so suddenly, he hadn’t even watched Thea get married and his heart broke when he thought of his sister. She was the closest to him. If they would have known that his demise was so close, Oliver would have made sure that he spent every waking moment with him. If only. His father had died of a heart attack. When it did occur, of course it was a matter of concern and they made a mental note to take care him in every way possible. Only they didn’t get another chance when two days post his cardiac arrest, he died in his hospital bed.

Moira was devastated. Oliver was pretty sure she wouldn’t have been standing right here, looking presentable if it hadn’t been for Thea. A surge of pride washed over Oliver. At twenty one, even though she was the youngest-she still tried to be strong. She put her grief on one side to help her mother, and that was commendable.

“Jean is here, we need to discuss the will.”

Oliver nodded as he started his trip down the stairs. Diggle followed suit.

…

“We need to clean this area,” Felicity mumbled as she stood up. Her eyes wondered off to the discarded tissues, “So much of tissue papers. You know Walmart has a sale for these things? Along with others of course. And the price was so cheap and now I’ve just used it too much of it and they would literally rip me off of money-I don-“Her mind was trying to channel her emotions this way, which-eh, wasn’t really a surprise.

“Felicity,” Courtney placed her hands on her shoulder, “We’ll get you tissues. Now, take a deep breath.” Felicity did as she was told, “Iris and I will clean this up. The boys will get the donuts and get that Twister game.” She spoke with a smile.

“And what about me?”

“Go get a hot shower. We’ll spend the entire day together. A game of twister, lunch and then a movie night. We’ll watch toy story, catch up on Game of Thrones and then, the weird Sherlock and female show that you have been dying to show us.” Iris spoke, and Felicity couldn’t help but add.

“Elementary.”

“What?”

“The show, it’s called Elementary.” Iris chuckled and nodded. A sudden thought entered Felicity’s mind and a part of her knew that they were trying to cheer her up and she shouldn’t bring it up but she did, never the less. “You know, the funeral is day after tomorrow.”

“Then we’ll go with you.” Ray’s answer was almost instantaneous and Felicity nodded, running a hand through her hair. A small smile played on her lips, “I should probably get on with the shower.”

Courtney nodded, “Probably.” She turned and looked at her husband, “You call Caitlyn and Cisco too.”

Barry chose to interrupt at this point, “I did call them. Apparently they are stuck in traffic, on the other side of the town.”

Iris’ eyebrows hiked up, “What were they even doing there?” After seeing Barry shrug, all she did was roll her eyes.

“Get going now!” Courtney said as she pushed Felicity through the bathroom that was just behind her couch.

Felicity sighed as she stepped inside the white tiled room. Her gaze instantly turned towards the mirror and she let out an inaudible gasp as she saw herself. Her hair was messed up, her nose pitch red-which oddly reminded her of Rudolph the red nose rein deer-God, was her mind messed up? Shaking her head, she turned around-ready to take a shower.

She can get over this.

She will get over this.

…

“According to the will set up by Robert James Queen,” Jean began as she sat on the plush sofa, Walter Steele-the eldest Queen’s dear friend and CFO of QC, sat beside her-peeking through the papers every now and then.

“Thirty percent of the shares that belong to QC goes to Thea Deardan Queen,” Jean spoke, her tone informal-knowing she was talking to her friends. She spoke straight to the point. Thea seemed to nod at this while sitting on the opposite couch right beside her mother. Oliver sat on her other side. Laurel, Tommy and Diggle stood right behind them, ready for moral support. Laurel’s hand rested on Oliver’s shoulder-the diamond ring she wore on her ring finger sparkling bright. In normal situations, she would have tried to hide it, but Jean and Walter were friends. Ollie had recently proposed to her-two days back. It came of as a big surprise, after all they had been together for a only an year but Laurel knew she loved him and clearly, he loved her back. He wasn’t ready for her to reveal the news to the media though-Robert’s Queen death was already creating a scenario, which was surprising since the news was released earlier that day.

“Thirty five percent of the shares that belong to the company, I hand over to my beloved son Oliver Jonas Queen.” Jean read off and Oliver frowned. Wait, thirty five?-what about the other-“Jean,” Moira spoke-“You might have read something wrong, Darling. That is just sixty five percent.”

Jean smiled at Walter, as if asking him to take over. Walter chose to put this statement lightly. He had to think before he started speaking, “Moira, have you heard of the company Oracle?” The female in question nodded.

“Well, the company’s success rate has achieved another height due to the company’s power being shifted to two CEOs instead of one. Recent results have shown that having two CEOs instead of one, can help a company accomplish more by delegating different roles to each head. Robert presented this idea to the board of directors and they agreed to it,” He spoke-his British accent prominent. “It provides increased scope with broader capacity and since Oliver has been involved in the company for some time now, Robert thought his work load would become less and the company can achieve new heights even in his absence.” He took a deep breath, firmly ending his speech.

“I’m not sure where you are heading with this conversation, Walter.” Moira spoke, her eyebrows furrowed.

“I am saying that, Robert Queen has placed two CEOs to take his place after his demise. The first one being Oliver while the second person will stand by him and is also the owner of the left thirty five percent of the shares belonging to QC.”

“And who is that?” It was Laurel who put up the question.

“Felicity Smoak.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the overwhelming response!  
> I'm so grateful to the people following my story on ff and now here!!
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for such a warm welcome!
> 
> Hope you're liking the story x  
> Kudos and Comments are always appreciated.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you again,
> 
> Srishti x


	3. Decisions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You can never hate the person who you once loved more than anything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for this response. I'm thrilled! :) 
> 
> Now, here is the timeline for the rest of the story :  
> Oliver Queen met Felicity Smoak met each other in 2007. Oliver Queen was just twenty two while Felicity Smoak had recently graduated from MIT and was just twenty one. Laurel was twenty two.   
> They met each other seven years ago.
> 
> (I know it is not in accordance with the show)
> 
> Enjoy! x

“No, absolutely no!” The sounds of the blonde woman ricocheted across her small townhouse. Her friends cringed momentarily before gaining their momentum back. The blonde however, continued to pace across the small path that led to her door, before turning around and heading towards her television.

Why can’t God just limit the drama for once?

She was feeling good. She was still in her pyjamas and they were already one movie down. A box of mint chip was already eaten and she had almost forgotten about the horrible day. The hot shower had indeed helped her and she had finally let a smile grace her face, a genuine one for the first time in what seemed like hours.

But then all hell broke loose.

One single phone call and that was all it took. If she knew that today her call list would actually suck, she would have cancelled her subscription. Anything would be better than this.

This was blasphemy.

It wasn’t as if the Queen family didn’t hate her enough. Felicity had come in terms with that fact in the past few hours. She knew that they weren’t on the best terms but they still had that formality lingering as a thread between Oliver and Felicity. Her apparent perception broke when no one had the decency to call from that side and as painful as it had been, she had drunk the bitter potion and had accepted that, no one cared.

Not even for formality sake.

Which sucked to be honest. But in the past three years, Felicity had endured a lot of stuff. And she had now accepted it whole heartedly that no one in that family cared, well-except John Diggle-who Felicity looked up as a brother and of course,

Robert Queen.                                                                                                    

And Grammy too.

Rest of the family?

Not so much.

When Felicity and Oliver parted ways, the media had turned frenzy. She still vividly remembered the time when she was being called a gold digger, a whore whose entire plan was to just trap a Queen and then just to get away with the property. She remembered when he out of all-

She didn’t want to think about it.

That is why she chose to leave without even asking for a penny. Getting money wasn’t her intention to begin with. She was a MIT graduate for God sake. She had the power to earn and fend for herself. But the accusations were just too much and now it seemed, that everything they ever spoke about-was coming to life.

Yay, another way to crush Felicity Smoak.

She knew at this point she should acknowledge that his father had placed something in her name but she couldn’t. Because that belief had been overshadowed by the oncoming fear. Working with him of all people.

Oliver.

She stopped, sitting on her couch. Her eyes turned into slits as she massaged her temple. The index finger and middle fingers of her hands massaged her forehead as she tried to get rid of the oncoming headache.

“Felicity, you need to calm down-“Caitlyn hadn’t even completed the sentence when Felicity bombarded at her, “Calm down!” Oh no, it was her loud voice. But honestly, did they expect anything less from her in this situation?

“I have just received a call from their lawyer stating that I have inherited thirty five percent of  Queen Consolidated-“ Felicity took a deep breath, damn that word was long, “shares and you are asking me to calm down?! He wanted me to be the CEO!”

Iris winced as she watched her best friend start a rant yet again. Her heart throbbed in her chest for the poor girl, who definitely had too much to endure that too in one single day. A small part of her was happy that Robert Queen was considerate enough and she even let it show on her face, until it all vanished after seeing her reaction.

Clearly, she wasn’t happy. Now, Iris had never met Oliver Queen but she had heard stories about him. A part of her was still sad and maybe it was Queen’s lucky stars that forbade their meeting or else Iris would have made sure that the guy never came near her best friend ever again. It had only been three years, since they had become friends, post her apocalyptic relationship but Iris knew enough about that damned family that made her hate them.

Well, except Robert Queen.

She remembered Felicity always spoke so highly of him, like he was her father and that is exactly what he did.

Acted like a father.

“No!” It was firm and Iris closed her eyes momentarily planning a scheme in her head just to convince her. “Call Donna, “She heard Courtney whisper to Caitlyn and her eyes caught Iris’ who blinked, understanding what she was up to.

Felicity had endured a lot of stuff in these past three years and it was the time that the course of life changed.

Not that she hadn’t shaped a great life for herself but that girl deserved better.

She deserved the best.

And her family and friends would make sure she gets it.

**…**

 “How could he do that? Why did he do that?” Laurel whispered to herself, the reality of the situation hitting her. She was curled up on her couch, a blanket draped over her. It was late in the evening and she had lost track of how long had she been sulking in here.

The news they had received had hit the family hard. While some reacted harshly, calling the will false, Laurel reacted emotionally. She knew she wasn’t close to the eldest Queen but this news seemed liked a crasher.

A constant reminder that she can never be Felicity.

She didn’t want to be the CEO. No, this isn’t what she wanted but it is the fact that in his death, he chose _her_ to be with him.

It wasn’t like she wasn’t insecure enough. She wanted to scoff at it. There was a time that she and Felicity were friends….sort of. Albeit, they started off wrong. But can you honestly blame her? She came between her and her Ollie and destroyed the little world she had created for herself. She didn’t know, how she got over him. Honestly, she never got over him but when she watched the two, it was like she was the outsider. Like she was the third wheel to a fully functioned car.

And so she stood in the shadows. She had suppressed her feelings for _Ollie_ and had moved on, but then-then, life happened.

And it was the so called couple caught in the crosshairs.

At that point Laurel made sure that she would be there for her friend. And soon, Oliver reciprocated her feelings and Laurel realised that she was fooling herself all along. She never got over him _._ She even remembered cursing herself for ever believing that Oliver and she were nothing.

Laurel and Oliver were _everything._ There was a reason it didn’t work out between Oliver and Felicity. Her eyes flickered towards the ring that rested on her finger. It was a symbol, a symbol of their love.

A love she wasn’t going to let go of.

Laurel Lance had lost Oliver Queen to Felicity Smoak once.

She’ll be damned it she let that happen again.

**…**

“Oliver, I think that is enough.” Tommy spoke, taking away the glass of whiskey he had previously been gulping from. Oliver frowned as he stared at his best friend. His face lolled momentarily, a side effect of drinking too much alcohol as he realised what had happened. He leaned against the bar for support, “It’s my club, Tommy. I want it.” He spoke, reaching for it when Tommy raised it high up in the air.

Oliver pouted as he finally sighed, knowing the battle was futile. He leaned his head against the bar, his friend gulping away the golden liquid meanwhile. “She is going to be back in my life.” He retorted and Tommy simply shook his head, “She’ll be back for the funeral. All she has to do is place the shares in your name and sign the contract. And voila! She is out of our lives again.”

“That’s the thing,” Oliver said with a side smile, “She is always here.” He said pointing at his head, “She is always here.” He said pointing at the left side of his chest, right above his heart, “And now she’ll be here.” He said pointing at his eyes which reminded Tommy of those weird stares he saw in the movie before Oliver pointed in front of him. “I can even see her babbling right now. Being her cute little self.” He said, his voice turning slurry at the end before leaned his head on the bar table.

Needless to say, he was drunk.

Oliver hadn’t admitted this ever that he never moved on from Felicity. Despite the heartbreak that woman caused him, he never moved on from her. His family knew this, so did Tommy-but when he started dating Laurel, their perceptions changed.

The thought that maybe he finally had started to let go of her.

Clearly, they were wrong.

Oliver closed his eyes, the alcohol taking a toll as he dozed off. “She won’t be ruining your life this time buddy.”

Tommy Merlyn swore as he watched his brother.

He won’t let her.

**…**

“What part of no don’t you get mom?!” Felicity shouted, “I will not work with him. I hate him!” She spoke and her friends blanched. They had seen Felicity angry but this? This surpassed everything.

“Felicity, think about it baby. This can shape your life. You are capable of so much-“ Donna was cut short by her daughter. An audible sigh echoed from the cell that was perched on the table as she knew what was about to come ahead.

“I don’t want it!” She spoke, her voice firm. “I am going to go there and name the company after him. I’ll talk to the board of directors if necessary, I am not working with them! Besides, being a CEO of such a big company, that too with him?! Nope, never!”

“Felicity-“

“No, Courtney!” Felicity screamed at her. Her voice was hoarse, breaking off at one end, “You know what happened with them! You all know!” She screamed at her friends, “And you want me to work with him?! To run their company?! They’ll chew me out alive! You already know how hard it is for me to go to dad’s funeral for _one_ day and you want me to stay there?!”

“Felicity, you should understand that we only want the best for you.” Cisco spoke. It was weird, he was generally the funny one but here he was, trying to console her. “No, if you did, you would have asked me to stay away from that God damn place!”

She sat on the couch with a thump, cursing herself for feeling so vulnerable. Small tears collected in her eyes, fighting off the barriers that she had created. “I don’t want to go there,” Her voice was a whisper, “I don’t want to see him.”

“Hey,” Ray crouched down right in front of her. “We want the best for you, okay? I am not saying you’re wrong. You are the vice president of my company for God sake, it is amazing. But being a CEO Felicity, it is different. You are in the front line. And that requires experience.” Felicity opened her mouth to protest, or well-tried to, “If you accept this offer it will lead to a benchmark in your career. Do you remember Oliver’s last words to you?” And Felicity closed her eyes, feeling the hurt inside of her.

Of course she remembered his last words. His name itself was a pang to her heart and to top it all, those words. They were etched brutally across her heart. It made her not believe in love. Because love? Love is painful as hell.

At this point everyone but Ray looked confused. They were aware of Felicity’s past but they were certain details Felicity had like to keep it to herself because reminiscing them only brought pain.  Only Ray knew-who was her friend before the Oliver scenario. They went to MIT together and since, then had been best friends.

God knows what Felicity would have done without him.

“Prove him wrong then. Show him how far you have come without him. Robert considered you as his daughter. He left the company in your hands because he knew you were capable. Are you going to let his trust just crumble away?”

Felicity whimpered slightly. She silently contemplated the situation. With a small sigh, she got up. Ray following suit. Rubbing her damp cheeks she looked at the occupants in her house, “I need some time to think.”

“You have all the time you want sweetheart. We’ll be here.” Her mother’s soothing tone helped her calm down further as Felicity drifted towards her bedroom.

She needed some time alone.

**…**

**February 2008**

_Oliver Queen tore his lips off Laurel Lance who let out an audible groan at the loss of contact. The door slammed shut and Oliver’s worst fears were confirmed at that point._

_Laurel’s eyes widened as she stared at her boyfriend, “He is early.” Oliver rolled his eyes, biting back a sarcastic comment._

_“No shit.”_

_Yeah, he failed._

_Laurel shot him an amused smile before she realised the intensity of the situation. Soft thumping echoed around what was a quiet house and Laurel knew what was happening, “Dad is coming!” Oliver looked around, his head moving like a lost rooster before starting to head towards the wooden closet._

_Laurel pulled back the hoodie that hung off behind his neck, “Not here.” She spoke and Oliver knew she was referring to the incident that occurred the last time when Quentin caught him. He gulped, remembering the threat that still lingered in front of him, “Outside the window!”_

_“What?” Oliver didn’t have the time to process as Laurel shoved him towards the window, which was really small now that Oliver noticed it. It reached his mid-torso. He was brutally shoved and he was about to glare at her when the footsteps drew closer. He held on to the sidewalls and jumped, stepping on to the parapet._

_He didn’t anticipate that it would be so high._

_Okay, maybe he did know it would be high. But his brain had literally stopped functioning for that split second. He looked down, the window closing with a jerk and he knew Lance was inside his daughter’s room._

_“The things I do for you Laurel,” He muttered to himself, leaning against the wall, beside the now closed window. “You better make up for this.” He said, as he walked across the rather narrow parapet, trying to figure out how to get down. He moved his hand against the white wall for support, catching a glimpse down again._

_His eye caught something._

_The shiny diamond bracelet that Laurel wore hung off his sleeve and he pulled it off, eyeing it warily._

_Someone else was doing that too._

_“Thief!” The sound wasn’t that loud, but considering he was on the parapet, it did seem to burst his ears. His eyes looked around, suddenly realising the word._

_“Thief!” And then he looked at her._

_She stood on the window that was just beside Laurel, on the other side however. While Oliver chose to walk towards the right, the girl had her face peeking out from the left side. “Me?” It was a sudden realisation that he probably did look like a thief._

_He was outside a window, holding a bracelet._

_“Oh no no,” He spoke, trying to talk to the girl who he wasn’t able to see very clearly. Partially due to the blonde hair curtain and due to the rather dark night. “Thief!” Oliver’s eyebrows spiked up as he tucked the bracelet in his back pocket, “Thief!” She was referring to him._

_Uhuh, she was about to get him in trouble._

_Without thinking he started walking towards her. If Lance had heard her, he was sure that he had a one way trip to prison, “No!” He spoke instinctively and the girl backed in, promptly trying to shut the window._

_Oliver luckily reached in time, holding the panes of the window in place. He had to make her quiet and he was three stories above ground. At this point, this girl was his only hope. The girl jerked hardly and Oliver looked at her._

_Her blonde hair cascaded down in curls and her face was makeup free. That was the first thing that Oliver noticed. Being a ‘playboy’ as Thea eloquently quoted him to be, he had been with his fair share of girls. And nothing went unnoticed by his eyes. It was a second later she screamed again and one side of the window snapped shut and Oliver blanched, reaching for the other side, “Stop!”_

_Her eyes widened and Oliver finally realised they were deep pools of blue, “Let go! There is a police officer right next door!” She shouted at the top of her voice, hoping somehow he would hear her. Oliver groaned before pushing his palm against her lips, successfully silencing her._

_“You girls shout too much.” Her eyes widened as Oliver tried to control his laughter. Even in this situation, something about her made him feel comfort. She was...homely and it gave him a sense of joy. “I am going to let go, okay?” He spoke softly, moving his feet closer to the window, “I am not a thief. I want you to listen to me.” He ended and the girl nodded vigorously._

_“Liar,” He smirked at her and the girls’ eyebrows furrowed, “Don’t scream.” And he could see the conflict that was clearly visible in her eyes. The girl nodded and Oliver finally let go of her._

_And then she screamed._

_Now, Oliver didn’t see that coming. His feet moved and his body shook with surprise. The single thing lead to him being shaken a little and Oliver lost his balance. He was about to fall when she caught him._

_Her hand reached forward to steady him and suddenly Oliver was jerked inside. He fell on the top of her both colliding with the floor with a force and he could see the girls’ face recoil in pain as her head hit the rather hard floor._

_And then she looked up. Now, Oliver never believed in fairy tales but this wasn’t something he had experienced before. Is this usually how people meet? “Are you okay?” He spoke softly and the girls’ head tilted towards one side momentarily as if analysing him. Oliver shot her a cocky smirk as if well aware of the fact that she was checking him out. Her and his chest were touching and as he watched her eyes widen, he realised how beautiful they really were._

_This girl was gorgeous._

_Unfortunately, he didn’t have the time to contemplate the situation further._

_With a jerk she pushed him off her and it suddenly dawned on Oliver where he was. He didn’t have the time to scrutinise his surroundings. The girl backed away towards the kitchen, hugging the shrug that covered her body. She scrambled towards the open kitchen and reached for a pan._

_Oliver tried to control his laughter as he got up, “Get out of here!” She spoke, her hands raised up in the air-the frying pan being waved as if it was a weapon, “I will not spare you!”_

_Oliver just stood at one end, laughing and the girl narrowed her eyes dangerously. “I swear to God I will scream and there is a detective who lives right next door.” She spoke, “And it will hurt too.” She said, trying to be menacing._

_“You don’t think I am a thief.” Oliver declared simply and the girl frowned, “I saw you on the parapet with a friggin diamond bracelet in your hand.”_

_“You don’t think I am a thief.” He spoke again, “There is a phone within your reach, you could have screamed more by now. But you didn’t.” He pointed out, “You don’t think I am a thief.”_

_“What?” She blubbered, biting her pale lip. “I know what I saw.” She spoke, flinging the pan in his direction and Oliver moved, clearly not expecting that. “Are you crazy?!” He tried to shout as the girl did what exactly he was afraid of._

_She reached for the phone that was on the slab._

_And Oliver blinked before moving, “Don’t! I am Oliver Queen!” He stated, wondering why he didn’t say that before. He stood right in front of the girl who now had hid the phone right behind her back._

_The girl scoffed, “Yeah, I am Kate Middleton. Listen Mr. Thief? Is that okay with you..does it offend you? But then again, why should I care? There is a thief in my apartment and I might die. Actually you just might murder me for babbling. Please don’t murder me for babbling.”_

_Oliver grinned, an amused smile on his lips. He was about to retort back when a sudden thump echoed and he found his eyes closing. The girl bit her lip, her pupils wide as she held the frying pan that she had just hit him with. “I have two frying pans,” That is the last thing he heard before his head lolled and he found himself falling on her._

**…**

Oliver Queen woke up from his sleep with a jerk. His hands moved across the bed, his pupils still a tad bit dilated yet his mind now functioning well.

He groaned, moving sideways burying his face in the plush silk pillow.

He was dreaming about her again.

**xxx**

Ray Palmer leaned against his balcony. He stared right ahead, gazing at the night sky. Well, almost night sky. The sky was blue-violet, showing various colours. On usual occasions he would be dining with his wife outside, trying to enjoy the calm weather. But today’s day had just been so hectic.

“Do you think we are doing the right thing?” It was his wife who spoke. She came and stood right beside him. Her hair was in a tight bun, a few brown strands escaping and highlighting her heart shaped face. Her brown eyes met his as she spoke, “Ray, we’re sending her back there.”

“For her own good, Court. Both of us know she is destined for better things and she needs to get over this fear too. Robert giving away thirty five percent and making her the CEO isn’t a joke. He trusted her. I want to respect him, I want to respect _her._ ” He paused, “It is for her own benefit, but if she wants to back off-I’ll happily agree to that too.”

“But-“

“She has to stop being afraid. She can’t live this way. She needs closure. She hasn’t even seen _him_ once.” He spoke and his wife sighed. She knew a part of him wanted the best for him professionally and personally.

 “When did the lawyer say to call?”

“Tomorrow morning. Apparently, it needs to be forwarded to the board of directors so they are prepared. If Felicity needs more time, I’ll put a request forward.” Courtney sighed, leaning her head against his arm, “I know why you want it Ray, but-“

“That bastard won’t be destroying her, Court. She isn’t weak. We’ll be there. I’ve almost lost her once, it won’t be happening again.”

**…**

Felicity sighed as she stared at the beautiful scenery right in front of her. The Central Park was indeed very beautiful, the flowers blooming of in different directions-soft dew drops resting on them. A gradient of colours appearing before her.

Seemed like she was the only dull thing in there. Usually, when people needed to think they preferred some place quiet but it was something about the sounds of a child’s laughter that warmed her heart and made her feel better. This place provided her that.

“Hey,” She didn’t have the time to think further, her reverie being interrupted by Joe West. Felicity looked up and shot him a forced smile that she knew he would see past.

It was weird how when she had lost one family, she had gained another. Never had she thought in an unknown city she would receive so much of love and respect. I made her swell with delight but now, she couldn’t even acknowledge that.

Old relationships had a way of reopening old wounds.

“I heard the news,” He said softly, sitting beside her on the bench. A sudden gust of air hit them and Felicity pulled her blue coat closer to herself, moving her fingers to push her glasses against her nose, “Which one?” She said dryly and Joe shot her soft smile.

It wasn’t pity. That was the first thing she noticed. No one among them had shown her pity, which was something she was grateful for. All did she see was comfort radiating of them. A small message that said they were here for her, which honestly warmed her heart.

Joe laughed lightly and Felicity found her lips curling up. “Why is everyone visiting me, today? What is this, Smoak meet?” She tried to be funny, trying to distract her mind. “We just want to be there for you.” He said and her head leaned down.

She could feel the tears collecting in her eyes and God, did she hate it. She didn’t want to be weak, she wasn’t _weak._ “Of course you are not weak, Felicity. Now is the chance to show them.”

Felicity blubbered, realising she had spoken rather than _just_ thinking. “I don’t know what to do,” She admitted it to him.

Past can be painful and she knew at some point of time she had to face it. But was she ready to do so?

 “I just-“The tears finally fell and Joe pulled her, “Come here.” His voice was soft and soothing, “We just want the best for you Felicity.”

“I just-I just don’t know if I’ll be able to face him. This is so weird because rather than running a billionaire’s company, I am more afraid of running it with him.” She spoke, “You know how to run a company, Felicity. You and Palmer have been running it for years and as for facing him, you said it yourself. You are strong. He-They are your past and you have let go of it.” He said and Felicity nodded, “Running away from your difficulties, only make it bigger. And you would have to face it at some point.” He said, “Don’t you want to see _him_?”

“I don’t have the strength.” She said before pulling herself off him. She looked up, taking her glasses out and then rubbing her eyes with her palms. She wiped off the water from the glass with the hem of her coat.

“You were given this life because you were strong enough to live it.” He declared and Felicity’s mind wondered, “If you would have left something like this to Iris, would you have want her to do it?”

Joe’s teeth flashed as he tipped his hat a little, “I would have made all the decisions thinking about my children, Felicity. I would have want her to do it, but ultimately it all comes down to her.”

“Listen to others, Felicity. But do what your heart says.” He gave off his final verdict before standing up. He leaned down, kissing her head and Felicity’s eyes closed before she sighed, “You know where to find me.” He smiled and Felicity looked up and nodded, “Thank you.”

“Anytime.” His response was short of much words but it summed up his emotion.

Felicity stood up, taking off her glasses. She placed her palms on her eyes and took a deep breath.

_Listen to others Felicity, but do what your heart says._

_You were given this life because you were strong enough to live it._

She had a decision to make.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! x 
> 
> Come say hi to me on Twitter : @Srishti369 
> 
> Seeya next time! x


	4. Home Sweet Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Best way to not get your heart broken,  
> Is to pretend you don’t have one – Charlie Sheen.

Felicity took a deep breath as she rested her head against the cold window. It had been two hectic days and the lack of sleep wasn’t helping her much. She mentally thanked her beauty gods for the creation of concealer but unfortunately, they couldn’t conceal the fatigue that flashed through her eyes.

Slight movement jolted her from her light sleep as she turned. Courtney flashed her a sheepish smile as she tried to get comfortable in the airplane seat. Felicity shook her head lightly, shrugging it off. “Sleep,” Courtney mumbled to her friend who shot her a thankful smile before resuming her previous position.

Airplane.

A plane that led them straight to Starling City. Felicity still couldn’t believe she was getting ahead with it. She wasn’t just attending the funeral, she was willing to stay there. To actually go ahead and fulfil Robert Queen’s last wish.

Frankly, Felicity had wanted to do what the eldest Queen had wanted her to do. But the lingering factor that laid in between her and his dreams were his family, _her_ former family. She knew the right choice but she just had a hard time accepting, making it. Working as CEO was something she was willing to do for the only father figure in her life, but willing to work with him.

She didn’t even want to see him.

There was a time Felicity had loved him deeply but now she loathed him. Loathe, it was a word that probably has a heavier meaning than the word hate itself. Felicity never considered herself to be the person who was capable of loathe but as the saying goes, the person who can love you the most is capable of hating you the most as well.

A small part of Felicity was still in denial. A pat she was refusing to acknowledge no matter what. Over the past three years she had created this wall, a wall she wasn’t letting anyone get through. A part of her afraid that she might turn vulnerable again in front of him. They was no one to guide her now too. She wasn’t stupid. Robert Queen loved the two of them together and this might as well be his last effort to get them together.

She was afraid that just might happen. Love was something in life that Felicity didn’t expect but then when it hit her she was the happiest girl on this planet. Life was something she didn’t expect either. She knew it wasn’t working out between the two-but it was him who gave the ultimatum. She was willing to fight.

It was weird, how he was willing to fight for everything but her.

Yet, she was vulnerable when it came to him. Afraid she might get out of that small world she had created for herself, she had secured for herself. Her fingers curled around the seat as she thought about the upcoming event.

Felicity Smoak wasn’t a weak woman. But Felicity Queen had always been a love sick fool and now she was buried somewhere deep inside. She was afraid that might just make an appearance once again.

And most of all, she was afraid of seeing _him._ They are certain things in life you can’t get past and they are some things you just don’t want to get past, afraid that letting go of it would be an insult to the memory, an insult to him.

Ah, life simply sucks.

“Stop thinking so much,” Ray spoke and Felicity snapped her eyes open, one eyebrow rising up. “I am not thinking.” She declared looking past Courtney who was sitting in between the two.

She was _musing._

“You have the frown.” Ray declared and Felicity laughed lightly. Ray narrowed his eyes, creases appearing on his forehead. “Nope, I didn’t.” Felicity retorted, somehow grateful for the distraction.

“You did-“

“You two are acting like kids,” Courtney spoke, her head leaning against on the head rest, her eyes snapped open revealing brown irises, “Your _husband_ is acting like a kid.”

Courtney opened her mouth to talk when the comms went off prompting that they were just about to land in Starling City. She whacked her husband in one single second who looked at her as if she had just grown two heads, “I told you to go via train. We reached in an hour! I-all of us needed some sleep,” She spoke rationally as Ray rolled his eyes, “We’ll get enough sleep in the hotel room.” He spoke, “You and me both know the first thing you do is go look for a Jacuzzi and when you do find one, you sleep in it!”

Felicity tried to control the laughter that was ready to escape her lips any second. The Palmer couple shared a knowing look, small victorious smiles gracing their faces. However, it was short lived when the wheels of the vehicle hit the runway and Felicity closed her eyes, her hands tightening on the seats.

Exactly thirty seven seconds later, she took a deep breath.

She was here.

**…**

Courtney took a right turn after telling Felicity that she needed to go to the Ladies room. She didn’t expect her to come and that is exactly what happened. Felicity was nervous, it was totally obvious and at this point she wanted some time alone.

She saw her husband moving towards them, their luggage being carried by him. In usual situation, he might as well have the cart but right now he didn’t need one. They had just brought a few days clothes. Rather than a day, they were ready to stay for a few, allowing Felicity to settle in for a little while. She knew it would be tough and they were willing to stay in here. She considered the option of a moving truck being loaded with Felicity’s goods so that she can shift, but Felicity refused to idea-claiming it was too early. She just needed to settle first. To get accustomed that she needed to stay here for quite a while.

A while.

After long persuasion and contemplating her decisions, Felicity had come to a decision which Courtney agreed and respected deeply. She indeed had made the right choice. Felicity had agreed to stay in Starling City and to be the CEO of Queen Consolidated. She was proud of her. She had chosen to put her past behind and actually fulfil Robert’s last wishes.

Felicity had made it clear that she would stay in Starling city only for a few months though. Courtney knew she wanted to escape this place as soon as possible and she was okay with it. Felicity had agreed to be the CEO, helping it reach success and finally a stable position before handing it over to Oliver.

She gets her experience and Robert’s last wish would come true.

Courtney sighed as she stared at her husband and Felicity. She won’t lie. Initially, she had felt threatened by Felicity. In the end, who wouldn’t? But then she met her and she realised that there was no one who was happier that Felicity when it came to Ray’s happiness.  They were like best friends-in one sense, siblings. And she was grateful for meeting her. At this point, she was one of her best friends. Five years ago, she had met one of her best friends and her soulmate-and she couldn’t be more grateful for it. She knew Felicity needed some time alone and Ray could get through her.

She should be envious in one sense but she wasn’t. She knew about their relationship and she had seen Felicity with Oliver. She was just in the initial stages of her relationship with Ray then and had caught herself wishing for a relationship like that. She never officially met Oliver. He might not even know who she was but she had seen the couple from far off, had seen Felicity talking about him and they couldn’t be more in love. If she had any doubt left about Felicity and Ray, it was all washed away.  

And now she was here back in Starling City.

Apparently to fulfil Robert’s last wishes.

She chuckled to herself, if they only knew what his wishes were. Maybe Ray can’t see it, being the overprotective best friend, maybe others can’t see it but Courtney knew. Fate is amazing, two people who are meant to be would always find their way back. She knew them, she had seen their love-and she disliked Oliver for what had gone through them but she still believed that it was one big misunderstanding. The guy worshipped the ground she walked on and then, suddenly it was all gone. A clap resonates because of two hands and it was misunderstandings on both their parts. She had seen Felicity being miserable and believed that Oliver was the same.

Belief.

It was what run the world. She really hoped she wasn’t wrong about Oliver. She really hoped Robert’s last wish came true.

She really hoped they would find their way back to each other.

**…**

Ray neared Felicity as he picked up the bag, hanging it off his shoulder. He let out a small grunt as he hung it and Felicity’s eyebrow rose up, “Someone is getting old.”

“FYI,” Ray sounded amused, “I am just two years older than you.” And Felicity laughed, “Keyword being older.” Ray narrowed his eyes before smiling lightly, happy to see her happy.

Felicity’s eyes dropped towards the watch she was wearing, the hands of it moving to show that it was six pm in the evening. The funeral was eleven am tomorrow which meant Felicity had enough time to catch a good sleep.

If she could sleep.

“So, ready for this?” Ray snapped her out of her reverie. He wasn’t tapping his feet which was apparently his habit to show impatience and Felicity’s mind ran a thousand miles, “She deliberately left you with me, didn’t she?”

Ray grinned, “Took you long enough to find out. You are losing your charm, Fee.” He said and Felicity just shook her head, leaning on her left leg. In normal situations, she would have loved to sit. But after sitting for one continuous hour, she was simply tired of sitting and honestly her ass was numb and sweaty.

Yuck.

“Say your piece Ray,” She spoke simply, “Don’t wait for me.” She added.

Ray sighed. He bit his lip before opening his mouth, “You okay?” His voice was soft and Felicity hummed, “It’s just a few months, Ray. I’ll be fine.” She reassured him and suddenly Ray felt like the roles had been switched. He expected her to be somewhat nervous right now, but she again proved that she was strong.

That was what Ray something had always acknowledged about. They are moments where Felicity Smoak could break down and cry like a baby, moments where she will feel vulnerable but in the end, she stood strong. She was a women who would do anything for the ones they love and has the strength to endure anything in this world.

“I am proud of you, you know?” He said casually, flinging his arm across her shoulder and Felicity grinned, “I know you are.” She said and Ray was grateful the smile wasn’t forced.

“Missed me?” Courtney spoke as she joined the duo. “Nope,” Ray answered, laughing lightly as his wife whacked his arm. He pulled away from Felicity as he said, “Come on, I asked the hotel people to pick us up from Gate number five,”

The girls looked at each other before Courtney started walking off.

“Starling City,” The blonde whispered as she moved behind her own trolley, unlike Ray she chose to put her stuff on a movable cart. Her hands clenched tightly around the steel rod, “Here we go.”

**…**

“Where the hell is she?” Oliver whispered to himself as he stood outside the airport. Oliver frowned, maybe he was at the wrong place? He looked up again-his eyes flickering to the sign that said gate number five.

His hands clenched on the white board that said her name. He looked around, his eyes trying to catch every oncoming passenger.

“Oliver.”

He froze as he heard her voice. His head moved towards the right trying to catch the source of the voice. He breathed a sigh of relief as he saw the female trot towards him, “Grammy.”

The woman gave him a warm smile as she moved forward and hugged the guy. Oliver leaned downwards, hugging her tightly. She gave him a warm hug, rubbing his back and Oliver was suddenly transferred back to his childhood. He leaned in her embrace and suddenly, his eyes closed. He had cried for his father, he had and he had vowed he’d remain strong too.

But now, in her embrace he just wanted to bawl like a child who had lost his father. “Shh,” His grandmother whispered and her voice was on the verge of breaking. Oliver was forgetting that she had lost her son too. And he regretted not informing her earlier. They wanted to talk to her in person-losing a child is painful. But before they could actually think about it, the news had been released.

But she understood.

His grandmother always understood. She was one of the best women Oliver knew of and she was heart-warming and in every sense, beautiful. She lived in a small farm house in Starling City only, secluded in one corner. She had been off to London when the demise happened, helping a friend with her granddaughter’s marriage when the news reached her. Oliver had expected her to scream at Moira or at him for that matter for hiding the truth and she did. She screamed that she wasn’t able to say her goodbyes, to visit her son one last time. It had been an awful three days where she refused to talk to any of them before she reached a conclusion, whispering that she understood their point of view. If she had been there-she would have done the same. His death was a surprise. It was a cardiac arrest that made people precautionary about his health, not leading to his demise. They didn’t want her to worry but she made them realise it was wrong too, she is a mother after all. But she understood and she was ready to play the motherly role despite everything that she had endured herself. First she lost her husband and then her son but yet, here she was looking out for others.

She was a grandmother.

She pulled away and Oliver could see traces of tears in her brown eyes. Her hair was pure white and her skin was crinkled but yet it seemed to enhance her personality rather than making it fade away. “I’m here.” She whispered softly and he nodded, “I’m glad.” He said with a small smile.

He thought momentarily before speaking, “I’m sorry.” He said and her eyes conflicted before she shook her head, “We’ll talk at home, okay? Now take me to the castle!” She said and Oliver grinned. “The car is right there,” He said as Diggle who was standing near the vehicle started walking towards them. Oliver shot him a smile and moved his palm, gesturing him to stop. “Go,” He told his Grammy, “I’ll be right there.” He said, reaching for her luggage. He knew John was about to help him with the luggage and he didn’t like that fact-he was never a worker, always a friend and he wasn’t obligated to this. It was his job, yes-but Oliver hated making him do things that landed their friendship in an uncomfortable position. They were equals, nothing more-nothing less. Besides, he was the head of security-he didn’t need to be with Oliver, he just wanted to be there and Oliver wouldn’t demean it for him.

“Fee!” Oliver’s head turned as his eyebrows hiked up. He narrowed his eyes, his heart thudding-was it-

“Oliver!” Oliver’s head whipped as Diggle called him. He shot him his trademark look and Oliver sighed. He clutched the bag hanging of his shoulder and gripped the handle on the other bag, ready to drag it across the street when his eyes unknowingly flickered towards the source of the voice.

He could see a brunette pushing a woman inside the car. Small blonde tendrils of the said woman were visible and Oliver shook his head. She being here wasn’t possible-someone would have told him.

He would have known.

“Coming!”

**…**

Felicity immediately pushed past Courtney, her head lolling out. Her eyes scrunched behind the spectacles as she looked towards her right, “Oliver?” She found herself mumbling and she would have had the time to contemplate, only she was shoved by Courtney who was telling her to get off her. She moved inside, mumbling a quiet apology before her eyes moved outside the window, “He can’t be here.”

“You okay?” Courtney asked her and she nodded, “Just tired, I guess.” Courtney shot her a smile before reaching for her bag that hung off her shoulder, “Here.” She said and Felicity looked down, her eyes catching the fortune cookie that she was offering, “I borrowed some from the airport.”

“ _Stole.”_ Ray mumbled from the front seat and Courtney flung two in his direction which hit him directly in the face, “They were tempting and the shopkeeper gave them to me willingly!”

“Did you flirt with them?” And Felicity tried to contain her smirk when she heard the jealous tinge in his tone. Courtney shot her a look and it was clear she had won the battle, “I have a weakness for sweet things.”

“You have a weakness for everything-seriously, Court-“

Felicity chose to ignore the banter as the car started moving-breaking to cookie in two she pulled out the strip of paper.

Shrugging off the biscuit crumbs that covered the strip, she narrowed her eyes to read the small black text.

_“You’ll meet your soul mate soon. ”_

Felicity blinked; talk about clichés. She won’t admit that her thoughts flickered back to Oliver. No, his chapter was closed. He won’t be creeping back in her life.

Not now.

Not ever.

**xxx**

Sleep was a bitch.

That was the conclusion that Felicity had reached at. Her eyes moved, looking at the ceiling that she was sure she knew very well. She remembered when she was a kid-her mother made her chant numbers from one to hundred and instead she chanted the names of all the hardwares she was aware. Yup, she was an A-class nerd, yet the formula did work. She found herself sleeping by the time she reached external peripheral devices. But yet, over here nothing worked.

He occupied her thoughts.

Which made Felicity hate him more. Why the hell was she so vulnerable to him? She made one last attempt at sleeping, knowing she needed energy to face everyone tomorrow but to no avail. Her sigh echoed across the large room and she looked at the large television that was before her.

She had made up her mind.

She would search through the recordings like she always does and hopefully come across a good film. Her eyes skidded towards the white menu card before she picked it up. She sighed and looked for her favourite ice cream.

Aha, mint chocolate chip!

Her blue coloured nails skidded across the white phone before she was hit with reality. The nail pain was worn off, showing off the clear nails and it seemed like Felicity had a stroke.

What was she doing?

A person she had considered like a father had died. It was like _him._ She was surprised how come she didn’t compare the two in her head but now that she did, her heart broke in two. People in her life were meant to go away, weren’t they?

He too had left her.

She curled herself in a small ball. No one would have guessed that a second ago, she was okay. This is what happens with all the girls, right?

Overthinking.

Her mind moved at a superfast speed and her heart hurt. How can she forget him that easily? Wasn’t he memorable enough? He was the only father figure she ever had. He was the one who danced with her at the wedding when she felt sad for not having a father daughter dance. He called her to check on her. He could have supported his son-but he supported her.

He even encouraged her to talk to him.

This was one thing he was wrong at though. It could _never_ work out between the two. Small tears leaked down her cheeks as she leaned her head against her knees, her cheeks wet and blotchy. She tried to as quiet as possible, hoping that Ray and Courtney hadn’t heard her. They needed some time alone. She closed her eyes, trying to block everything.

Trying to block him.

Now that she thought about it, it would be the last time she will get to see her dad. Would he kick her off? Because Felicity sure as hell won’t let Oliver do anything to her. She was here to fulfil her dad’s last wish and she would make sure it happens-even if it meant going against him.

She hoped the Queen family won’t cause her any problem. She moved her head, wiping her hands across her cheeks. Her eyes landed on the magazines that was resting on the other side table. She wondered how her gaze didn’t land up there before.

He was on the cover.

So was Robert Queen.

The lines read, “The world says goodbye to a Legend.”

That was all he was-a legend.

They say grief has various stages. The first one being denial and isolation. Something inside of you breaks every time you think of that one person who left you. It may be your husband or your father. You couldn’t help but feel your heart throb in pain when you think about them. And then comes in-

Anger.

Felicity had accepted that Oliver had left her but now her dad was gone and she found herself in the same position she was in three years ago. Only crying for her father instead of the love of her life.

Love of her life.

She wanted to laugh.

In anger, she flung the magazine hard-it landing on the floor with thump. He was gone. Her father was gone.

And his asshole of a son is someone she would have to meet tomorrow.

She gritted her teeth, tears leaking off her cheeks, “I hate him.” She murmured, “Why me?” She found herself questioning, her eyes back to the ceiling as if trying to talk to God.

Why me?

Isn’t that the question everyone asks? Why did this happen to her but not anyone else? Why is it that she gets to face the wrath of the Queen family and she didn’t even do anything-there are always questions roaming in everyone’s head. She found herself in the same crossroads she was in three years ago.

But she was done.

She would be damn if she let anything break her again. In order to not to get your heart broken-it is better to reveal it. She wouldn’t let him win.

She wouldn’t let anyone break her. She was done being a mess. She had shaped a life for herself in three years. A life her father would have been proud of. Was proud of and she wouldn’t lose it. She would fulfil her father’s last wishes and stand firm.

She wouldn’t let him win.

Not this time.

The blonde curled up in her bed further, small sobs turning into whimpers as she tried to control it. She was done being weak. Her hand wiped away the tears as she laid on her bed, closing her eyes.

Hoping for a good sleep.

Hoping for some strength.

The magazine laid on the carpeted floor. The sharp grey colour background contrasting with the white carpet that covered the floor. Robert Queen was etched across the cover, sitting on a chair like the king he is. Behind him stood Oliver Queen who much like his father was dressed in a black suit, his hand resting on his shoulder. The picture depicting money, power and their relationship.

The Queens.

The most influential family in Starling City.

**xxx**

**_Seven years ago._ **

_The Queens._

_The most influential family of Starling City._

_Oliver Queen, her ass._

_She wanted to scoff when he told her that. Seriously, couldn’t people come up with good names? Like anyone would believe him. He was a thief. Honestly, Felicity would have let go of him if he had not jumped into her house. She was scared shitless when that happened._

_Her eyes eyed him._

_And attracted too. Now Felicity wanted to whack herself in the head. Was she seriously having a stroke of Stockholm’s syndrome? What is this-some sort of fairy tale?_

_Her mind was moving tangentially again. She bit her lip, finally looking at the man who was lying on her kitchen floor._

_Holy shit, there was man lying on her kitchen floor._

_She moved her leg, hitting him in the bicep with it-albeit lightly. On getting no response, she breathed a sigh of relief. Now maybe she should try and talk to her neighbours. One of them happens to be a detective too._

_She would be creepy though, since she knew beforehand he was a detective._

_Plus, she was sure she was going to freak them out. Hey, hello. I am your new neighbour and I have a thief who is unconscious in my apartment._

_Wait, wait-backtrack._

_He was unconscious only, right? What if he was dead? She eyed him carefully-trying to avoid the lining on his shirt that was exposed due to his front torso being in contact with the cold floor. His chest heaved lightly._

_Oh, so he was alive._

_Felicity took a deep breath._

_She clutched her shrug, ready to go outside and consequently lead her social life to a drain. She bet Ray would laugh at her now. Well, scream at her first for not running away from a thief would definitely be first though._

_She tried to open her door but something on the doorstep caught her eye. Throughout the day she had been busy analysing her new apartment that she didn’t realise that her newspaper was lying in a mess beside the door. It was her first day at Queen Consolidated to top it all, plus she will meet Robert Queen-talk about nerves._

_It gets to her, yeah._

_She moved trying to put the paper away when she read the headline._

_“The Queen and the Merlyn merger. The two industries at its rise.”_

_Her eyes landed on the two family pictures, trying to capture the look of her new boss. She looked at the Queen family before she shoved the paper away, ready to ask her neighbours for help._

_When-_

_Her eyes widened, pulling the paper towards her again._

_Oliver Queen._

_He was Oliver Queen. The guy who happened to be in the headlines of Starling City was in her apartment, “Uhoh.” She mumbled, her eyes full blown as if small planets popping out._

_There goes her career._

_Thank you for nothing, MIT._

**xxx**

_When he woke up, Felicity was nervous. Who wouldn’t be? She moved the glass of water that she placed for him on the side table._

_Yup, he was in her bed._

_She cringed when she thought of that._

_“What?”_

_Okay, maybe she had spoken it out too._

_“You’re awake.” She chose to avoid the topic, knowing she would land herself in a deeper hole and besides, his voice was hoarse as he clutched his head. He was hurt._

_A small part of Felicity was proud too. She can defend herself now that she thought about it._

_His hand took away the glass that she held. She placed her finger at the base as Oliver gulped down the liquid. On drinking half the liquid, he hit his head against the pillow. “Where am I?”_

_Great. She gulped. Did he lose his memory? Oh hell-_

_“You!” His voice was sharp._

_Well, he clearly hadn’t lost his memory._

_“I’m sorry!” She spoke instantly, “I thought you were a thief but you are well..Oliver Queen.” The last part came out a whisper._

_“I told you! You hit me with a frying pan!” He spoke. Felicity expected him to be harsh, but ironically he wasn’t. Weren’t rich people supposed to be rude?_

_Not that she was complaining._

_“I know, I am sorry!” She pleaded, trying not to disclose that because of him her career was in jeopardy._

_Or maybe he could use his power to chuck her out of the city._

_“I won’t do anything like that,” He said, his voice firm and Felicity looked at him, realising she had spoken her word out loud. He was now leaning against the bed, cringing again and again from the pain._

_Felicity wandered off to get a cold pack of peas. She bit her lip as she thought about him. Oliver Queen or not. He was a stranger and yet, she didn’t have a problem with him inside her house._

_Well, to be fair-it was his fault._

_She offered him an ice pack before resuming her position beside him. “What were you doing outside?” She asked, her eyebrow risen up and Oliver shot her an annoyed look, “My girlfriend’s father who happens to be the detective you were talking about had arrived home. She kicked me out through the window. It was her bracelet you saw.”_

_“Oh.”_

_So much vocabulary for a scholarship student though._

_“Oh? You hit my friggin head!”_

_Felicity suddenly regained her voice, “You were in a questionable state! Beside, why did you run towards me?”_

_“Because you were screaming so loudly and I was three storeys above, you were my only hope.”_

_Felicity sighed, breaking the small silence, “Listen, I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have hit you with a frying pan.”_

_“It’s alright.” Oliver clarified, “It was my fault. You know..with the bracelet and hand,” He paused, “No one would have believed me. Besides, I should be thanking you for not calling the police. Wait-how did you know that I am Oliver Queen?”_

_Felicity brought the newspaper in front of her, “This.” She told, showing him the picture, “I had almost gone to meet the detective. I swear my social life would have ended right there.” She laughed before putting the newspaper down._

_“Really? I was pretty sure my life would have ended right there.” Oliver retorted, “He hates my guts.”_

_“Are you that bad?” Felicity’s eyebrow rose and Oliver rolled his eyes, “My past track record hasn’t been the best.”_

_“Let me guess, drunk and cops?” She mused and Oliver looked at her questioningly, “How did you know?”_

_“I have gone down the same route my friend.” She laughed and Oliver chuckled._

_You are not from here, are you?”_

_“Nope, Las Vegas.” She said, “I just knew a few things about your family, nothing special. Like how you are a family of four and practically the king of Starling City which sound funny when you think about it because you are Queens who are Kings. Not that a king is superior to a Queen. I mean in your case there is no king so you don’t have-“_

_He laughed._

_Oliver whole heartedly laughed and Felicity’s eyebrow quirked before she giggled too. His teeth was on show and he chuckled deeply, completely amused yet stunned by this girl. His pain was forgotten as he talked to her. She was...genuine._

_A second later, awkward silence ensued, Oliver being lost in thoughts. Should she say something? Felicity had always hated silence though it was better than her babbling incoherent stuff._

_“Thanks,” And Felicity looked surprised as Oliver continued, “You know for everything.” He said and Felicity smiled softly, “I am glad you didn’t call the police.”_

_“So am I,” She laughed, “Although I would have preferred this being cleared earlier. I wouldn’t have to drag you here. You are really heavy,” She laughed before she turned her head, “Is that really all muscle?”_

_Oliver laughed. This girl was refreshing. He should have been angry, well at least a tad bit-but he wasn’t. In normal situations, girls would have tried to hog him by now and a small part of him knew he would have let them._

_But she didn’t._

_Instead, she laughed with him. The only person he usually did that with was Thea or sometimes Laurel or Sara._

_Weird._

_“What is your name again?”_

_Her eyes twinkled as she smiled at him. Oliver tried hard not to grin back as her rosy cheeks puffed up while her lips curved, “Felicity Smoak.”_

_Felicity Smoak._

_He sure as hell would remember this girl._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and loving this story! x
> 
> Come say hi to me on Twitter : @Srishti369
> 
> Seeya next time! x
> 
> Srishti :)


	5. And It Begins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “We act like we don’t care.  
> But on the inside, it hurts.”

Oliver Queen stared at himself in the mirror.

In his short span of twenty nine years, he had seen a lot. Maybe not to others. Maybe to others he looked like a rich man who had everything at beck and call but that wasn’t the case. He had seen problems within his own family-where he wasn’t interested in anything related to the company. He was a complete frat boy, who wasn’t sure what to do with life. He cheated, he lived the luxury life like he owned it and indeed he did.

Until _her._

It was weird how her not being her affected it too. He was pretty sure that she won’t be coming down or else someone would have told him. A part of him was hopeful that she might come and he wanted to kick himself that despite everything that she had done to him-to _them¸_ he still wanted to see her. Which was not fair to Laurel. He made a mental note to take care of her and maybe a small smug part of himself wanted to show her the life he had been leading. That he had moved on. And he had. He was sure what he was going through was just a conflict of emotions.

He loved Laurel.

He proposed to Laurel.

Okay, maybe the proposal had a bit of an off timing. But ever since they had started dating again-everyone had chewed his ear off that he had finally moved on so he bought a ring. Thinking that maybe that would be the ultimatum. Losing his father had brought back an old fear like he lost _him_ and he didn’t want to go through that pain again.

So he proposed.

And he could hear his father’s voice in the back of his head that he made a mistake doing so.

He didn’t know what to think of it.

His father had always loved her and he wanted to chuckle dryly, but then again-who didn’t? But when she turned out to be backstabbing bitch-his father still supported her.

Which angered Oliver to no end.

To make matters worse-co-CEO? Really, dad? Was he that incapable? Hadn’t he proved himself enough? Two CEOs will let this company rise. Oliver could have done it or maybe he could have asked Moira to join him.

But no.

Felicity Smoak.

He glared at his reflection, her name reeling in her mind. She made him feel guilty. That even after the death of his father-he was angry at him rather than crying his eyes out. Mind it, he had cried but at this point-all he saw was anger.

He always chose her.

He always encouraged her.

And to make matters worse,

She didn’t even have the courtesy to reply. He was sure he would have heard from Jean by now.

“So much for being the perfect daughter,” he scoffed to himself.

But as he stared at himself in the mirror he realised that even though he was angry at his father. He would do anything, anything to see him.

He was his father and sure they had their disputes but he loved him and he would do anything to see him.

Anything.

And he was gone.

He refused to acknowledge the part that said he would do anything to see her too.

**xxx**

Felicity took a deep breath as they neared the area. The funeral was taking place in the Queen Gardens and a sense of déjà vu hit her. Her eyes nearly glossed over before she shook her head. No, she had to stay strong.

A sudden halt made her realize that they had reached their destination. She swore her heart stopped as she stared at the mansion that once used to be her own. Popping the door open, she stepped out. A gust of wind hit her as her hair flew lightly. She took a deep breathe.

It was weird.

How did she dread going inside her house but how this castle was once her home. She probably was aware of every nook and corner of the said castle from the times she sneaked inside just to meet Oliver. This was her home once but post marriage, the newly wedded couple shifted to their own place before resuming their stay in the Queen Mansion yet again due to the circumstances.

  She could feel her friends’ gaze on her before she shrugged it off. She appreciated the concern but she didn’t want to be a burden on them. Ray moved his hand that clasped the roses that they had bought. Felicity picked out one and held it close to herself as if it was shield.

“Hey,” Ray nudged her and Felicity looked up, her blue eyes wide behind her glasses, “Conceal it, don’t feel it.” And Felicity mustered a giggled.

“You made him watch it?” She looked at Courtney and the brunette nodded before linking her arm with his, “Of course I did.” She looked proud.

She could hear the sounds of people approaching that distracted her for a split second as she looked at the gigantic gate, “Now or never, yeah?” She spoke trying to sound funny but it was coming off as a dry chuckle. The trio started as Felicity muttered, “Conceal it. Don’t feel it.”

She couldn’t believe that she was trusting Disney in this stuff.

Weren’t they responsible for this mess?

Happy ending with a prince charming, yeah right.

**xxx**

Oliver stood near his father’s coffin. Chairs were assembled right in front of it and the funeral was about to begin in a few minutes. Laurel stood beside him, her hand on his arm as she tried to showcase her support. For the first time he couldn’t feel the ring piercing through his arm or maybe it was the second time and he liked it-

He’d wonder if that was a bad thing.

He looked at Tommy who had been a great support for the past week. They had been each other’s rock. Over the past years-Robert was more of a father to him than Malcolm as he quoted eloquently and both were shaken by the loss.

Moira, Tommy and Thea stood on the other side while his grandmother sat in the front, roses clutched tightly in their hands as if preparing themselves for the worst.

A few seconds later, Oliver would think-maybe they were.

A nudge by his sister made him turn towards the gate, his eyes trying to locate what she was trying to show.

It approximately took him one second.

Felicity Smoak stood there beside John Diggle.

**xxx**

Felicity moved inside the gate, her heart thudding in her chest though she had been mentally preparing herself for anything.

“Well, if it isn’t Felicity Smoak,” The voice caught her off guard and she looked towards her right before blinking. “John?” Her voice reverberated and the man chuckled as he stared at her. Felicity moved forward and hugged him tightly.

It had been three years after all.

She remembered the last time she saw John-it was when she was at the airport, ready to bid her old life goodbye. He had been her rock post her relationship end with Oliver. One of the few people who supported her. John, Robert and Judith were the only ones. She couldn’t help but grin lightly, despite the situation. It had been so long.

So long since they have seen each other in person. When Felicity bid her old life adieu she resolved to ignore everybody from that life which included him but after a year or so, they reconnected again and Felicity found herself kneading back the brother-sister relationship they had developed over the years. “Where is Lyla?” She asked and he all but pointed in her direction.

Felicity looked and gasped lightly, “Is that?” Her voice shook slightly as she stared at Lyla who was holding a three year old in her arms whose arms were flapping in various directions as she babbled to her mother.

Sara.

She remembered her. A small part of her throbbed in pain but she shrugged it off. Named after Lyla’s grandmother, the child was once the apple of Felicity’s eye. She didn’t even get to watch her grow.

She remembered when she asked John for a picture and received one of a two year old who was eating a piece of cake-her birthday cake. She remembered thinking that she might as well be the cutest thing she had ever seen with her black curly hair and her full blown smile. She remembered her eyes filling with tears as she imagined _him_ there too.

“She’s grown so much,” She stage whispered as John flashed her a small grin, “It pains me to know that she has grown that much.”

She let out a breathy laugh. Looking this as his cue, Ray finally stepped in-“John Diggle.” He said as he moved his hand forward for shaking. “Mr. Palmer.” John said formally shaking his hand as he nodded his head. “Ray.” The guy spoke, “It’s been long.”

“Indeed.”

“Hi,” Courtney stepped in, “I am Courtney.” She introduced herself and John nodded as his right eyebrow rose in question, ”Palmer.” She clarified, “His wife.”

“I remember reading about you.” John told her, nodding, “It’s a pleasure meeting you.”

“Likewise.” Courtney smiled. Only a few people knew about her. She and Ray had been dating for two years-secretly, she had been dating Ray before he made his own company. She was proud of him but she chose to hide behind the doors, trying to avoid paparazzi in every way. But then all hell broke loose when they got married. She was in tabloids and newspapers but then she got used to it and many things made her realise that not everyone knew her. Just the business people.

That was a relief.

And life in business world usually concerns the business people not them. Their family is just like a glimpse. So, she was the underdog since she wasn’t involved in his business, choosing to spend her time in her office being a lawyer rather than getting involved in his business. She was known to Central City as an awesome criminal lawyer rather than his wife. And she was happy about it.              

She had her own identity.

Her brown eyes flickered as she saw Felicity gazing at the casket that lay right in the centre. She knew her friend would burst into tears in mere seconds. Despite three years, sometimes some things just reopen old wounds and losing someone close so close to her, it is not easy.

The three watched Felicity as if she was a broken doll-afraid to ask anything. John was worried because despite the confrontation of the situation that everyone else had more than a few days to cope up with the tragedy, Felicity had two days.

Two miserable days.

Felicity gazed at the casket as her vision blurred. A second later her eyes shifted, staring at the people surrounded.

Staring at Oliver.

**xxx**

Oliver Queen was a potential businessman. He owned a club with his best friend, he chose to stand on his own feet. He also chose to help his father. To decide that he indeed wanted to carry on the business.

The first thing his father had taught him that in business word you expect the unexpected.

But certain things exist in life that you don’t expect. And when you do-you are stunned for a moment, mind unable to analyze the situation-

That was what it was-

Seeing Felicity.

He noticed her in a split second. Her blonde hair struck him among the crowd. He always told her it was a distinct feature that made her stand up in the crowd-and now that he stared at her, he hoped he was wrong.

A split second later she turned to look at him. Their eyes met for the first time in three years and his heart thudded.

His father told him there is one split second where you don’t realise what had happened but now that moment has passed as he realised what is actually happening.

She looked beautiful.

Even though he was mentally cursing himself for feeling this way but he did. She looked simply but beautiful. Her hair cascaded down her back as her blue eyes-God, he had missed them stared right at back at him. His fingers moved, a nervous habit he had as he stared at her.

She came.

She cared.

A second later he felt light pressure on his arm as he turned. Laurel looked at him, her expression stony as she realise Felicity’s presence. He snapped out of the reverie as he stared at Felicity, who walking towards him.

He got caught up in the moment.

He needed to stay strong.              

No, she wasn’t messing with him again.

He couldn’t let anything weaken him. He hated Felicity Smoak and he will make sure she knows it.

 xxx

“What the hell is she doing her?” It was Thea’s voice that reached her ears which made her clench the rose the had been been clutched in her hand since the very beginning. She had chosen to walk up and finally face her impending doom.

She took a deep breath as she neared the seating area. There were still a few people who were surrounding the area and she could feel everyone’s gaze at her. As if it was burning holes in her body.

“Get off the property.” Tommy told her clearly as he stepped forward and her eyebrows furrowed, “I don’t think so.”

She mentally gave herself a pat on her back for staying strong. Her father would want this and she would make sure she gets it. She never did anything wrong, so why should she be at the receiving end of their inhuman behavior?

Tommy began to protest but that is why Ray stepped in, “I don’t think I would like to meddle into this, Mr.Merlyn. You don’t want to make a show out of this funeral, do you?” His voice was crisp and cold and Felicity shivered involuntarily. Yeah, he was really protective of her.

“Really? Since when did my father’s funeral become your concern?” And Felicity closed her eyes for a split second as her fingers tightened on the stem of the flower.

Strong.

“Since the time you married my best friend. We both know that went well, didn’t it?” She couldn’t believe that Ray had actually said it-but she was okay with it now. She opened her eyes and found Oliver gazing at her.

She stared right back, her gaze firm.

“That is none of your business,” And Ray cocked an eyebrow, opening his mouth to speak when Felicity cut him off, “I’m not going anywhere.” She declared as she could Moira gazing sharply at her.

Why was the Queen Family supposed to be so big?

“This is my husband’s funeral-“

“This is my ex-father in law’s funeral.” Felicity told her, “Which happened to be like my father. I am not leaving.”

She could hear footsteps approaching the small crowd that had been formed around her and Ray. Courtney, since anyone didn’t know her was in the back lines and Felicity hoped that it was her approaching her. But, it was-

Laurel.

God, kill her now.

She saw her make her way towards Oliver before reaching forward to clutch his hand tightly.

Oh.

_Oh._

Bitch.

Oliver gazed at her almost expecting a reaction out of her but she remained static, her poker face on.

He wanted to scoff at himself-of course she wouldn’t give a damn.

He moved away, his hand being released from Laurel’s tight grip as he patted Tommy’s shoulder, “Let her attend the funeral and then kick her off the property.” He said and he was sure Felicity heard him as she narrowed her eyes at him. He wanted to shrug off the topic of the will at the moment, knowing if she didn’t sign it in the given period of time-then he would be the owner of the remaining thirty five percent.

Why would she have a share in his father’s will?

Felicity sighed as she stepped aside, her hands still clenched along the flower though. Courtney’s eyes were a bit on the wider side as her head pivoted towards the departing crew.

She raised her eyebrows that told Felicity that she was wondering what the hell had just happened?

She shrugged her shoulders, walking towards the seats that were laid for everyone. Her eyes squinted as she saw grandma Judith looking at her curiously before she muttered, “Felicity?”

“Grammy?” Her voice was a whisper and in an instant the old lady stood up, before moving her arms to hug her. “It’s been so long.” She whispered and it was Thea’s voice that reached her ears, “Yeah, Grams hug her like nothing is wrong.”

Ignoring her, she hugged her tightly, leaning down. She closed her eyes as Grammy rubbed her back. “It should have been me.” She heard her-his grandma whisper and she pulled away, “It should have been me. I am the older one-“

“Don’t talk like that.” She all but declared, “I know it is hard..” Her voice trailed off, “But we’ll get past it.” She murmured, “We always do.” She said and she could feel Oliver’s gaze burning holes at the back of her head. “I’ll see you afterwards.” She declared, “Or I am pretty sure I would wind up dead and your head would be chewed off by your family.” She said with a light hearted laugh but her eyes did shine, showcasing the small layer of water that had been formed covering her cornea.

“You know I’m with you, right?”

“Of course.” She said, smiling lightly.

xxx

The funeral went like a blur. Felicity didn’t really hear what the priest was saying which in one way did suck but her mind was filled with the memories of this placo, of _him,_ of her only father figure in life, of all them.

 He was one of the only people who stood beside her.

He understood her and Felicity was sure that even if she had known her father, he definitely had showered her with more love than him.

A small shoulder push snapped her out of thoughts as she realised that the funeral had ended. A set of twin tears rolled down her cheeks as she looked at Ray before nodding her head and getting up.

Following others in tow, she placed her rose on his coffin and closed her eyes taking a deep breath, “I’ll miss you.” She whispered, “I love you dad.” Her voice was still a murmur and she looked up, finding the entire family staring at her.

She chose to ignore them.

People who she didn’t care for, did their opinions really matter?

She moved away, turning her back against the coffin as she pulled off her glasses, rubbing the wet surface of the glass against the black fabric of her dress.

“Hey,” Courtney murmured softly, “There is someone who wants to talk to you.”

Felicity’s gaze flickered towards her line of vision.

_Jean._

xxx

The Queen Mansion hadn’t changed one bit.

Okay, maybe her photographs were off the wall now-but despite that it hadn’t changed one bit.

She felt almost surreal being back here. She remember swearing to herself that she would never step into this house.

And now here they were.

“Hey,” She heard Lyla speak as she looked at her. Her eyebrows rose as she found herself with a huge smile on her face as she grinned at the toddler who was staring at her, her eyes full of wonder. “Hello,” She said softly, dragging of the word as the word held a tinge of baby talk.

The little girl in turn, moved her head-turning it towards her mother before hiding it in the crook of her neck.

“She’s shy. “ Lyla told her and Felicity jiggled her head, understanding. She ran a through her soft mop of black curls, “It takes time to warm up to someone.” She spoke, “What have you been upto? Still with-“

“ARGUS? Yeah,” She answered, “It must be hard though.” Felicity told her and Lyla laughed, “Not at all. ” She grinned, “I’ve trained Johnny in everything. Besides Sara is total daddy’s girl, aren’t you baby? “She cooed at her daughter who finally looked at her mother before turning towards Felicity and nodded her head.

Felicity laughed heartily, ”Hey Sara,” Her voice immediately softened as she looked at the small child, ”Who are you?” The little’s child voice was full of wonder and Felicity looked startled for a split second before she spoke, “I am Felicity.” She introduced herself.

“Fecity.”

“Felicity.” Lyla encouraged her and Sara looked at her bewildered, “Fecity,” She spoke and the two women laughed, “Fee.” Felicity told her, “I am aunty Fee.”

The girl looked at her mother who nodded at her, “I am Sawa.” She said before turning her head as she saw a figure heading towards them, “Daddy!

“Come here princess,” And Sara immediately opened her arms, moving forward-almost toppling off Lyla’s arms as John grabbed her.

“Daddy’s girl,” Lyla muttered to Felicity and she grinned.

Despite the giddy feeling that was going through her as she saw John’s family, she couldn’t help but feel her heart throb in pain too.

Eveyone had someone.

It seemed like she was the only left alone.

xxx

“How can she even show up here?” Thea looked at her mother, “Even talking about some people is a waste of time, Thea.” She said hugging her, “You don’t have to think about all this,” She said before her gaze flickered towards Oliver as she sighed.

She didn’t know about Thea.

But Oliver was definitely thinking about her.

xxx

“That is Detective Lance,” Ray spoke and Courtney’s eyes followed, “The good detective who just turned captain.” She told him, “That is Sara.” She said pointing at the blonde before her gaze flickered towards the other girl standing beside them, “That is Laurel, who was Oliver’s ex-girlfriend and now current girlfriend.”

“Current girlfriend?”

And Courtney flashed him a look that said ‘Are you kidding me?’, “You didn’t see the way she caught his hand, did you? Guys are so clueless.”

Ray scrunched his eyebrow, “He got back with her?!” He exclaimed as the realisation dawned on him, “What the-“

“Fuck.” Courtney mumbled and Ray looked at her incredulously, “I thought you didn’t swear.”

“Are you seriously asking me that?” Courtney looked at him, “I don’t even know what she sees in Oliver. They are toxic together.” She looked at the girl before flickering her gaze towards Tommy, “And didn’t the best friend had feelings for her?”

 “Wait, what?” Ray found him floundered again, “How do you know all of this stuff?! You don’t even know them!”

“Well, I did see them from afar on their wedding.”

Ray scoffed, “That was two years ago.”

“First, how did you get into MIT again?” She retorted, “Secondly, a girl simply knows. I saw them again a few times and Felicity confirmed too-this Merlyn guy definitely had hots for Laurel- _Gorgeous_ Laurel.” She ended her talk with a sigh.

“You are hanging out too much with Fee,” Ray rolled his eyes.

“Speaking of which, when did Jean say all of us had to get together?”

“Two.” He answered before looking at his watch-“We have an hour.”

“I feel bad.” She said after a minute of silence, “Felicity is there probably bawling her eyes out and I can’t even shed a single tear or comfort her. How screwed up is that?”

“Come here,” Ray mumbled and she moved frward, hugging him. It seemed weird but yet comforting. She could feel staring at her as she pulled away, “People are staring,” She spoke softly, “You didn’t know him Court. You didn’t cry because you didn’t know him.”

“I  know but he seemed like a great man.”

“Yeah, he was.”

xxx

One hour later, Felicity stood beside Courtney and Ray as Jean analyzed the papers. Her glasses were on and Walter sat beside her. He had flashed Felicity a friendly smile and her mind reeled back before she realised who he was.

She would have probably tied sitting but in this awkward atmosphere, she knew sitting would make it worse.

It really was awkward.

Courtney’s eyes kept flickering as she looked at everyone. Oliver sat on the couch, his jaw clenched, Moira sitting beside him-her gaze sharp fixed at Felicity. Oh, if looks could kill.

Then there was baby Queen.

Too much of anger bubbled inside a small body, Courtney couldn’t help but think. She knew that if it wasn’t for the boy who was holding her hand in the funeral-she would have punched Felicity.

And then Courtney would have punched her.

Needless to say, it wasn’t going to be a pretty scenario.

“You know the terms and conditions then?” Jean said and Courtney snapped-she wasn’t really listening to her.

Not that it counts.

But being a lawyer, it shouldn’t happen.

Oh well.

“Yes,” Felicity mumbled. She had stated that her inheriting the thirty five percent was Robert’s decision and she would have get into her CEO shoes by day after tomorrow. A board of director’s meeting would take place just so they can know-Oliver and Felicity and that was it.

“So your decision?”

“I’ll sign it,”

Now that resulted in many reactions.

Oliver’s eyebrow quirked as he spoke, “No you won’t. This is my company,” He said firmly and Felicity looked at him, “Then you should have spoken first. Why do you think I was asking for the terms and conditions?”

In a split second she took the pen from Jean’s hand as she sat and leaned on the table signing it.

“Stop right there!” Tommy told her and Felicity looked at him, “This is his property, not _yours._ You don’t have any right in it,” And Felicity simply flipped the papers, signing on the other paper. “I think you got it wrong, Tommy.” She said, “It is mine. Thirty five percent.”

“How can you allow her to do that?” Thea spoke and Tommy started to make his way towards Felicity when Ray interuppted

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you buddy.”

And this was when Oliver snapped, “Stay the fuck away from him!” He told him as he stood up, “Jean you said that-“

“There was only way out of this Mr.Queen,” She said, “If she didn’t sign it.”

“Of course she would sign it. She was always after the money.” Laurel joned in on the conversation and John rolled his eyes.

She really didn’t get it, did she?

“Says the girl who gets back with him at every opportunity she gets.” Courtney stepped forward and finally glanced at Laurel.

John bit his lip to control his laughter.

“Stop right there!” Moira Queen spoke, her voice strong as she stood up. Her gaze was fixed on Felicity as she narrowed her eyes, “You won’t get away from this.”

“And all of you, stop fighting like children.” She told the room and Walter smiled lightly as he watched her, “You could have fooled my husband, but not me.” She looked at her ex-daughter-in-law, “We will get our company.”

“It was and is yours Moira.” Felicity spoke, “I am just doing what he wanted me to.” Her voice was soft.

And Moira didn’t falter.

With a sigh she got up as she gestured Ray and Courtney to move out. They turned around and Felicity looked at Tommy and Thea who stood side by side, “Thank you for the warm welcome.” She flashed them a smile.

She started to walk away and almost neared the door when-

“What the fuck do you think you were doing back there, Felicity?!” She flinched visibly as Oliver screamed at her, holding her arm tightly.

She whipped her arm away as she looked at him in the eye, “What he wanted me to do!”

“Damn it,” He said rubbing his hand across his face, “This is my company. Not yours.”

“It is your _father’s_ company, not yours.”

“Withdraw.”

“Excuse me?” She looked at him as if he had grown two heads, “I’m not withdrawing anything.”

“I want this Felicity, this is my company.” He said, his voice soft this time.

“You said it yourself Oliver. Why would I care?” She said, her poker face on. “You mean nothing to me.” She spoke before turning around and leaving as Oliver stood right there.

_You mean nothing to me._

His last words to her.

xxx

Felicity sat on her bed, a stuff toy clutched in her hands. She moved her knees as she leaned her head against them, the scooby doo toy still in her hands.

**_Seven Years Ago_ **

_For the first time, Felicity was going to meet Robert Queen._

_The Robert Queen._

_He had her recruited right after she got out of MIT. She did know that big companies graced MIT for placement but the head teacher didn’t tell her up until the graduation day that she was a recruitment too._

_Apparently they had been a feud for her amongst Queen Consolidated, Wayne Industries and Kord Industries._

_It made Felicity puff her chest out._

_And she wanted to, literally._

_But the she figured out she would look like a slut while doing so she backtracked._

_She entered the elevator as she took a deep breath. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. Fixing her glasses she looked at her dress, wondering if it was professional. She wore a simple knee length dress that was red in colour but a small portion at the end was yellow-almost offwhite. Her hair was down, cascading down her shoulders as she blinked, holding on to her file tightly._

_The door opened as she turned right before walking up to the desk that stood right before they glass cabin._

_Robert Queen, CEO, Queen Consolidated that is what the board in front of the door said._

_The lady flashed her a look that made her believe she was tired. She showed her, her new badge and the assisstant checked the eldest Queen’s appointment before nodding. She told her that Mr.Queen would enter his cabin within five to six minutes and she could wait inside._

_She almost wanted to say no. How can she stay in a lonesome cabin? Wasn’t that some sort of disrespect?_

_Nevertheless, she went inside because the lady at the desk was giving her creeps._

_Like checking her out._

_Or maybe she was just judging her character_

_That was worse._

_She walked inside the cabin that was practically bigger than her appartment._

_Her heels made a sound against the marble floor. It did however alert someone as she saw the black chair swinging and a head popping up._

_Felicity squealed in surprise as her hands moved, papers flowing all around. She mentally groaned._

_“Felicity?”_

_Felicity at first didn’t hear him. She bent down down to pick her papers up and suddenly, she was sure someone was standing behind her._

_Dammit, she forgot. Someone else was here to._

_She got up, her back still to the person, “Please don’t be a th-“_

_“Thief?” His voice echoed, “What is it with you and thieves?” And Felicity whipped her head. “You!” She gave Oliver a pointed look, “What are you doing here?”_

_“This is my father’s cabin.” Oliver pointed out, “And your interview was today? IT department, right?”_

_“Yeah.” Felicity said fixing her glasses before she bent down to resume her task. Oliver crouched too, picking up the pages._

_“I never took you for the sexy librararian type.”_

_“Excuse me?”_

_“You know, the whole red lipstick and the glasses-do you reall-“_

_“I would stop right there, Queen.” Felicity warned as she took the stack of papers Oliver offered her before clubbing them with hers. She patted the bundle against the marble floor, making sure it was even before placing it back in her file._

_“What? It’s sexy-“_

_“I’m an employee here.” Felicity told him, biting her lip to hide her amusement, “So?”Oliver cocked his eyebrow and Felicity rolled her eyes, “Which means talking to me like that-it’s bad. What were you doing here anyway?”_

_And then she looked at him._

_Like look-look._

_He was wearing a dark blue sweater that hugged his body, oh so greatly and his jeans hung lose._

_Was it legal for boys to go out this way?_

_“I needed to charge my phone. Dad and I have the same one, so I needed it.”_

_“It’s eight am. Your image doesn’t pass you off as a morning guy.”_

_“Did you google me?” Oliver grinned at her and on seeing her blush, he retorted, “You did, didn’t you?”_

_“And you didn’t sleep last night, did you?”_

_Damn, despite that the guy looked real good._

_Maybe it was the whole after sex glow._

_Oliver let out a breathy laugh before nodding,”Thank you.”_

_“I said that out loud,” Felicity realised as she closed her eyes, hiding her face behind the black file. “I’m sorry.” She told him a minute later, “I didn’t meant judge you-not that I did.  It’s just that something-“_

_“It’s alright.” Oliver grinned at her, “You babbled a lot last night.”_

_And she blushed. She had said a few things-not that much before they parted ways._

_Oliver opened his mouth to say something when his dad finally entered the cabin. “Oliver?” He looked up and greeted his dad, “Hey.”_

_“What are you doing here?” He looked at him, “I came here to get the charger. Sneaked past your assisstant.” His father sighed looking at him._

_“And you are?” He looked at Felicity almost judging her-she could feel it. She turned crimson, “I’m not with him.” That was the first thing she said._

_“I mean what I meant was I’m with him-but not with him with him. Like girlfriend type. I’m not what you’re thinking. He is not my type.” She babbled and Oliver looked offended, “Could have fooled me.” He mumbled. And Felicity flushed._

_“I’m Felicity Smoak sir.” She looked at the man in front of her. The Robert Queen. Like he was a living legend and a great entrepreneur._

_“The MIT grad,” He finally cracked a smile and Felicity took a deep breath, “Yes sir.”_

_“You are one of the best employees that I have ever recruited. Fighting off the other industries was tough,” He laughed, “But I hope it would be worth it.”_

_“Of course Sir.”_

_Oliver took that as his cue to leave. Before leaving he leaned down, whispering softly in her ear, “You are not my type either.”_

_And Felicity rolled her eyes before letting out a breathy laugh, her cheeks red._

_“So,” Robert looked at her, “Take a seat.” He smiled and her and Felicity smiled._

_She looked past glass wall of the cabin where Oliver was talking to the assisstant._

_Probably flirting._

_Later, she gets to know that Oliver was asking where the IT department was._

_She tried not to think much about it._

xxx

Grief is a powerful emotion.

People say you shouldn’t really think much when you are sad.

But the thing is-you don’t think about anything but the cause of it.

Felicity wasn’t a genius when it came to emotions. A screwed up marriage was itself an exhibit. But she did know-

The stages it goes through. Your mind tries to channel your emotions in different ways-

It’s painful.

It’s awful.

_Isolation_

Judith leaned against the rocking chair they had placed inside her room. She wasn’t really fond of it but at this point all she wanted was to be alone.

She was older than her son. She had seen the world but yet it was he was who had to go first.

It wasn’t easy losing a child.

It just wasn’t.

_Anger._

“Ollie, you alright?” Laurel asked as she leaned on their bed, trying to hug him. She just wanted to be there for him.

His gaze was fixed and his jaw clenched, Laurel knew he was thinking about something. She moved her hand but Oliver shrugged her off, “Not now Laurel.” He moved away, getting out of the bed.

He really needed a drink.

Fifteen minutes later, he leaned against the balcony of his large house, his mind running as he nursed his drink. He growled when he realised he would have to convince Laurel later on.

He was lying to himself.

He wasn’t angry because of that.

His hand curled around the glass tightly. His grip getting stronger second by second as the glass finally cracked. He hissed as the whiskey hit his wound, his hand now coated with blood and alcohol.

_You mean nothing to me._

Why did his father do this to him?!

_Bargaining_

“Do you think we could have saved him if he had taken care of his health since the very beginning? I mean, I think it was me. I always gave him reasons to worry about-“

“It wasn’t you, Thea.” Roy looked at her, “I know how you are feeling now. And trust me, it wasn’t you.” He spoke firmly, “You all did all you could.”

“I just-“ She trailed off, her eyes turning glossy as Roy pulled her towards him. “It wasn’t your fault.” He kissed her mop of curls as the tears went down her cheeks.

“It wasn’t.”

_Depression_

Family.

It was a word Felicity believed that never was in her cards. It was always her mother and her.

_Us two against the world._

But then many people came in her life and she was introduced to the term _Family._

Until it was all ruined.

‘ _Why the hell did this happen to me?’_ She mused to herself as she hugged the stuff toy, the tears won’t stop.

They just won’t.

_Acceptance_

“That is how my day went,” Moira told the grave in front of her. “I swear I always will hate you for giving away that thirty five percent.” She murmured to herself before letting out a breathy laugh.

“You won’t convince me this time, would you?” She said, her voice full of melancholy.

She got up, running her hands across her cheeks. “I miss you.” She whispered in thin air before she took a deep breath.

“Goodbye.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like it :) 
> 
> Come say hi to me on Twitter : @Srishti369 
> 
> Until next time x


	6. Queen Consolidated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “If you lock two people who hate each other in a room.  
>  Either they kill each other  
> Or fall in love.”

Sunlight penetrated inside the large room via the large glass window as the brunette pulled off the curtains, allowing the heat and light to flood in.

“Wake up,” Courtney spoke as she eyed her friend who was laying still on the bed. Her hair ruffled, her face forming an uncomfortable expression that Courtney was pretty sure due to the sudden light before it softened as she pulled the quilt close to her and sighed.

Courtney wanted to let her sleep-knowing that it had been days since she actually got a good one but alas, the circumstances weren’t in their favour.

“Felicity,” Her voice was soft like mother calling out to her child, “It’s eight am-you need to wake up.” It had been two days since the funeral and now was officially the time for her to greet work at Queen Consolidated _along with_ Oliver. “Two more minutes Mom,” Felicity promised as she turned her head away from her, her hair flinging off in different directions as she did the same.

Courtney bit back a laugh and was about to reply when a mop of black hair caught her vision as she saw her husband peek in, “She still asleep?” He asked her quietly as he stepped inside the room and she nodded her head, “Yup. I can see why you two are friends.” She laughed and Ray looked at her, a smile on his lips almost as if reminiscing, “We were never morning people. Back at MIT, we slept at four or so, high on coffee,”

“What did you up until four?”

“Talk. We had tons of projects to do. Well _she_ had. I was her senior by two years.” Ray stated and she nodded, “I used to stay up until four too sometimes.”

“And what did you do?”

“Do you really have to guess?” Courtney looked at her husband who shook his head, “Let me guess. Twitter, Facebook-“

“I studied too, alright?” She defended herself before looking at Ray who flashed her a knowing look. She sighed, “Okay, not all the time. And I believe the word that you are looking for is _Tumblr_ my friend. It’s like an amazing-“

“I know,” He sighed, “Felicity loved it too.”

“I know that. How the hell do think we bonded so fast?”

“You two talk so much!” Felicity sat up in an instant and Courtney blinked, her eyes wide. She didn’t anticipate Felicity waking up-“You scared me!” She said, her hand on her chest as she breathed heavily.

“Her bed hair has always been scary.” Ray retorted and Felicity shot him a sharp look but unfortunately it wasn’t very threatening due to the blonde locks that covered her face. Her hair was really a mess, golden colour spikes going off in different directions. “Says the guy with creepy eyes.”

“I don’t have creepy eyes! Court, tell her!”

Courtney laughed as she looked at the two before turning towards Felicity. “Breakfast is coming. Pancakes, bacon and toast.” She paused, “I’ve laid out the outfits that I think are the best for today inside the closet but rest is up to you.” She continued.

Felicity looked at her and smiled, “Thanks.”

“No worries,” She grinned at Felicity before she began walking, around the bed-ready to get out of the room. “And you should be in the shower Ray.” She gazed at her husband, “You stink.” Those were her last words before she escaped the room and the two occupants in the room looked at each other as the male huffed, mumbling along how mean his wife was.

“You are lucky you have her.” Felicity told her best friend, trying to put her point and Ray sighed before nodding, “Don’t I know it.” He mumbled and Felicity moved her hands in her hair, trying to locate her hairband, “Too bad she can’t say the same.”

“Hey!”

She got out of bed with a smile full of amusement as she muttered, “She didn’t really reply you back at the creepy eyes thing, did she?”

Ray’s eyes widened.

“Courtney!”

**xxxxx**

“Ow!” Ray itched as he fanned his hand in front of his mouth and the girls tried to control their giggles, “Hot! Hot!” He chanted before reaching for the glass of water that was placed there by the waiter who had served them breakfast.

“Of course it as going to be hot you idiot!” Courtney reprimanded him and Ray just shrugged her off, his tongue almost hanging out before he pouted his lips, trying to suck in some air.

Felicity laughed as she watched him before her gaze flickered towards the elegant clock that laid on the other end of the room.

_9.35 am_

She frowned-her mind running as she realised that she needed to be at the company within the next thirty five minutes. The meeting was scheduled to begin at ten thirty am and she knew she needed some time to prep herself so she wanted to reach the company by ten fifteen.

Fifteen minutes should be enough.

Her fingers curled around the coffee mug she held, various scenarios flashing across her eyes-they would probably make her life hell there.

Maybe fifteen minutes wasn’t enough.

“Everything is going to be okay.” Ray told her and Felicity blinked before shaking her head as a yes, trying to reassure him.

She can do it.

Over the past two days, she had time to reminisce and accept her father-in-law’s demise-thanks to her friends. She was now ready to move his legacy forward. It was something he trusted her with and she’ll be damned if she didn’t comply to his last wishes and do want he wanted her to do.

“I know,” She told him, “It’s just, it has been a while since I visited Queen Consolidated.” She said before taking a sip from the mug-leaving a fuchsia lip print on its rim.

“Well, being a CEO isn’t that difficult.” Ray assured her, “So don’t get nervous. And you worked there before-so stop sweating.”

“I worked there in the IT department.”

“You were the _head_ of the IT department.”

“And you were the vice president of Palmer Technologies.” Courtney joined in the conversation, “Don’t worry. Everything is going to fine and with that presentation you made? It is going to be kickass.” She laughed, her hand reaching for the toast that was laid on a plate.

Felicity took a deep breath.

And then took another deep breath.

“I’ll be okay.” She didn’t know who she was consoling, was it her or her friends? Moreover, she didn’t know-what she afraid of was?

Being the CEO?

Or

Being the CEO with _Oliver?_

Her phone rang, snapping her out her of reverie as she moved her hand across the table. A small smile graced her face as she pressed the green button on the screen before she spoke, “Hey John,”

_“Ready for your first day?”_ Ray and Courtney turned their attention towards the breakfast as Felicity conversed with the former soldier.

“Yes.” She said instantly, “I’m nervous but I’ll get through it.” She admitted.

“ _Great.”_ _He paused before continuing, “I’m waiting downstairs in the car.”  He stated._

“Wait, what?”

_“You are the new CEO of the biggest company in the city. What do you think Felicity? I’m here to pick you up.” He retorted._

“How come Olive-“

_“Oliver has no say over me. Besides, since when do I listen to him? “_ And Felicity was probably showing off her entire set of teeth and she listened to him.

“I’ll be down in a minute.” She said before she heard the word ‘Bye’ on the other end. She promptly ended the call as she stood up-pushing the table back with her hands to gain momentum, “Ray, I don’t need the car.” She declared and Ray rolled his eyes, “Already heard you.” He told her and Felicity moved away from the table, making a beeline towards her room.

She entered her area before her eyes wandered around the room behind her glasses. Her gaze fixated itself on the laptop that was on the bedside table as she reached for it. She looked for the laptop bag and found it a second later on the dresser before she placed her laptop and charger inside it and zipped it up.

She blinked as she stared at herself in the mirror, her hand still clutching on to the black bag strap that held her precious laptop. She had always been a freak when it came to gadgets-which wasn’t a surprise since she was an IT specialist. She honestly felt a little hollow without her tablet now that she was finally distracting herself.

Initially, a part of her felt guilty that she was moving on too soon. But then her mother talked her out of it, making her realise that this was _life._ You can’t help it but live it. People who have to go will go but it is you that lives behind and have to live your life further. She also wanted to talk about _him_ but she refused to listen. One thing at a time was enough to deal with. She was going to fulfil his last wish and he will forever remain in her heart.

She looked at herself in the mirror. Her hair was in a ponytail-her usual hairstyle. She was wearing a grey dress that had a black neckline along with two orange patches in the middle. Coupled along with orange and black earrings plus heels-she was satisfied with her look.

She turned promptly before taking a breath or two and then she started walking out.

She had a meeting to reach.

**xxxxx**

Courtney waved her hand in the air as a goodbye while Felicity left the suite. She turned her attention towards her husband who just finished his coffee, a piece of bacon hanging off his mouth. She shook her head and Ray looked at her, his one eyebrow cocked-almost camouflaging itself amongst his black mop off hair, “What?“

“Nothing,” She laughed before pushing herself away from the table as she stood up. “You have a meeting with that Chinese businessman.” She reminded it and Ray frowned, “Xieng Chu!” He said realised a second later. “Oh god,” He mumbled, “Two hours of listening him speak.” He groaned, his expression making Courtney giggle.

She leaned forward, pecking his lips lightly before speaking, “Laptop and headphones are in the bedroom.” She told him before she turned around- _almost_ turned around when Ray caught her hand.

Her brown eyes met his as he spoke, “Do you really think I have creepy eyes?”

She giggled before escaping his hold and heading towards the bedroom.

“Courtney! “

She grinned to herself while making a beeline towards the bedroom, she realised that maybe everything was going back to normal.

Normal.

Yeah, she missed normalcy.

**xxx**

Oliver entered the elevator, his blue eyes flickering towards the buttons that were on the left side before pressing the floor number. He tapped his foot against the lift floor impatiently as the doors began to close.

He heard a distant ‘No!’ and he took this as his cue to press the open lift button.

A second later, he wished he hadn’t.

Her blonde hair was the first thing he noticed, followed by her dress and then her looks. She looked gorgeous like always and he hated the part of himself that acknowledged that. She was panting lightly and he was sure that she had made a run towards the lift. “Thanks,” She mumbled before looking at him and promptly froze at the site.

He flashed Felicity that clearly said ‘Fuck off’ now that she tried to analyse him. Yeah, same emotions this way buddy. As if there wasn’t enough of anger against him, he really pissed her off with his last conversation.

Her last words continued to ricochet in his mind and he bit his lip, his jaw locking tightly.

Awkward silence ensued as the lift started to move up, soft jazz music playing in the air and Felicity tried to look anywhere but him.

The door opened a minute later as they reached the floor and she breathed a sigh of relief, stepping out. He followed suit and she made sure she was ahead of him-more like she made sure that they weren’t side by side as they started to walk towards the conference room. Her eyes flickered around repeatedly as she realised that Queen Consolidated hadn’t changed over the years.

She entered the room, a minute later only to find two people already seated there and she blinked-clearly not expecting their presence. Oliver bumped into her as she had stopped short on seeing the people. Clearly, she wasn’t the only early one. She nodded her head towards the occupants in acknowledgement.

She moved into the room and analysed her surroundings before walking towards her seat.

She realised that another set of feet had stopped beside her and nearly contained her groan as realisation dawned that Oliver was sitting right beside her.

“Fill me in,” He told her and Felicity looked at him, “I will.” She knew she had to do that-this was a _joint_ effort for him.

What the hell was dad thinking while pairing him and her?

“You haven’t done anything.” She realised a second later and she flashed him a smug look, “What happened to ‘it’s my company Felicity’?”  She chose to keep her voice low. They didn’t want to give away the impression that the two CEOs didn’t get along.

“Well, unlike you I have proven myself over the years. “

“Yeah,” She mumbled sardonically, “I’m sure you have.” She said before adding, “And unlike me? I was the head of the IT department. “

“Because of me.” Oliver said and he knew it was a low blow as her eyes narrowed. Both of them knew that whatever Felicity had achieved in her life was due to _her_ hard work, he never had a say in that.

_Lies._

“Felicity Smoak and Oliver Queen,” The lady in question whipped her head and looked at the person who was sitting right opposite her. The nameplate right in front of her said ‘Margaret White’ and Felicity grinned at her. Beneath her name was written ‘Finance’ which was so very small that she was aware that she was without her glasses-she wouldn’t have able to read to that to save her life.

“Hello,” She greeted her back and Margaret smiled. Felicity mused that the lady was probably in her early fifties as she flashed her a smile. Her hair that was fixed in a proper bun along with her professional attire probably would have fooled Felicity into believing that she was a tough nut to crack but her warm smile told her something else.

“I must say I was glad when Robert put forth the names of you two as the potential CEOs. I wish we could have met in better circumstances,” She told them and Felicity nodded, “Thank you and so do we.” She mumbled softly.

“It is really great seeing you two get along despite..everything.” She could see that the woman hesitated with last word, “Yeah.” It was Oliver who answered and she looked at him, “Let bygones be bygones, right?”

She wanted to laugh at the irony.

“Are you still working with Ray Palmer?”  And this grabbed Oliver’s attention as he stared at Felicity while she answered, “Not at the moment,” She laughed it off, “He’ll probably have to find some other VP.” Margaret laughed too before she turned her head and Felicity followed suit, trying to catch her line of sight.

_Moira Queen._

Great, she was here.

“What is Moira doing here?” And Oliver turned his head for literally a nano second before he bit his lip, “I don’t know.” He sounded exhausted and Felicity almost wanted to comfort him.

_Almost._

But then that emotion vanished.

“You work with Palmer?“ Oliver looked at her sharply and she looked at him for split second before she zipped open her laptop bag. Oliver caught her hand and she finally looked at him, “What Oliver?”

She was seriously tired at the moment. She could see past the glass wall of the conference room that Moira was talking to the two people who were inside along with some people who had just reached the room-clearly a part of the board of directors.

She was probably bitching about her.

How her husband made a mistake and stuff.

She bit back a groan.

“How long have you been working with Palmer?” He asked indignantly and Felicity pulled her hand away, “First of all, don’t touch me.”  She said and for a second she thought she saw Oliver wince.

Nope, not possible.

“Second of all, one and a half year.” She told him before adding, “I really don’t think that is your concern though.”

She opened the laptop, her finger moving across the mouse as she opened the presentation, “Now can we focus on the task at hand?” She didn’t give a chance to talk as she started telling him what it was all about.

She failed to notice his clouded expression.

**xxx**

Moira clearly had done a good job. Felicity knew that most of the people that were present in the conference room were eyeing her warily despite the track record that she had set up in the past.

She hated Moira. She was one diabolical woman.

Luckily for them, Oliver and her coordinated really well and she didn’t put forth the rather mean comment that she had in mind about Oliver and Moira because it was clear-Oliver wasn’t a part of it.

She was happy that her hard work was being appreciated. She was happy Robert’s decision was being appreciated. It took her almost a night to complete the entire presentation. Ray had almost chewed her ear off that day, trying to give her pointers for the presentation.

She saw Oliver’s jaw click.

Did she say the last part out loud?

People were getting out of the conference room, shaking hands with both the CEOs as they did so. Not, _potential_ CEOs but the current CEOs.

Felicity looked at Moira, who seemed deep in thought. Oliver walked towards her mother who flashed him a remorseful look.

Did they hate her that much?

It took her a second to realize that all the people had left. She looked around once again-just to double check. Her gaze met John’s who stood at the end, his arms crossed as he looked at her. He smiled at her and Felicity smiled back-glad that they was someone around here that she knew.

He was proud of her.

He was proud of both of them.

Her phone rang as she recognized the face that was flashing across her screen, “Hey Ray.” She spoke, placing the phone against her ear.

And then, she ranted off.

**xxx**

 “Hey Ray,”  

Oliver chose to ignore her as he focused on his mother. His fists had curled up involuntarily but he refused to acknowledge her as finally opened his palm and placed one on her mother’s shoulder, “What did you say to them? “

“I told them what kind of a woman she is Oliver, “Moira’s was crisp and it was clear that she wasn’t regretting it.

Not one bit.

Oliver bit his lip, he was caught in a conflict. Never once did he doubt Felicity’s ability to lead a company but it had always been the fact that they’ll be working along and this was _his_ father’s company not hers. He deserved it-not her.

As much as she could run it, she didn’t deserve anything from them.

“I wish that somehow I could have prevented all of this.”  

“Don’t blame yourself for this,” Oliver told her, “There was only two ways out of this-her not signing at all or her signing after the time duration passes, “He declared.

Moira looked at him. “We could not have told her about it and then the board of director-“

“Mom, “Oliver paused, “Not telling her wasn’t fair to Dad and it is under the clauses too-she had to be told. It’s her decision.”

“And now she is back to wreak havoc again.”

Oliver turned his gaze towards Felicity, her back in his view. He wished somehow he could prevent this. He knew Felicity would lead the company well, but what about the other factors? The catastrophe happening inside of him? The emotional turmoil that was happening inside of him?

He _hated_ her.

They were bad together.

It was a mess.

“Yeah, she is.“

**xxxxx**

Felicity looked at Gerry again. Apparently both Oliver and she would get their personal assistants and Gerry happened to be hers.  Meanwhile, Oliver got a hot blonde as his assistant.

She’d wonder if that was planned.

“Your cabin is this way,” Gerry told the duo and they followed suit. Felicity remembered the last time she came here quite vividly. She didn’t need to be directed. Robert Queen’s cabin was probably the biggest room in the entire building. Glass walls, large shelves-it was simply perfect.

Her gaze flickered towards the desk that laid in front that was for the assistants. Two large computers kept on the desk and she frowned.

Why two?

Wasn’t this supposed to be her cabin?

Or perhaps Oliver’s?

A feeling of dread settled in the pit of her stomach as she looked at the glass door. Two dark mahogany boards were fixed on it, white text protruding out of them-the words written in cursive.

_Oliver Queen_

_-CEO, Queen Consolidated_

_Felicity Smoak_

_-CEO, Queen Consolidated_

“We are sharing a cabin,” Felicity whispered and Oliver didn’t look so happy either. She turned her gaze towards Gerry and let’s go with hot blonde, okay? “Why are we sharing a cabin?”

The hot blonde started to answer and Felicity almost had to squint her eyes to read her name on her ID card, Evelyn. “This is the cabin where the CEO sits, Ms. Smoak. Since we have two CEOs, you two would be sitting here and have to share it.”

“No,” Felicity to Oliver’s surprise was pretty verbal. She was always opinionated but if times arise, she co-operated too.

“I’ll talk to Walter,” Oliver told Felicity and she nodded. “But there is a slim chance we’ll get one on the same floor.” Oliver declared and Felicity let out a dry chuckle, “That would be better.” She said and Oliver knew he should agree with the sentiment.

And he did.

But some things pinch you really hard.

“Yeah, way better.”

**xxx**

The two sat inside the cabin. It was like they were beside each other, but they weren’t.

No one wanted to talk to the other.

Or maybe they did, but were too afraid.

Felicity stood up, pushing the chair backwards as she made her way towards the shelf that contained files and books.

The silence is the room was deafening.

Her fingers moved across the collection of books that laid in the second row when a knock snapped her attention.

“Two black coffees,” Gerry said as he made his way inside, two cups of coffee clenched in his hands. Felicity frowned-she didn’t order coffee, did she?

Oliver did.

Oliver thanked him as he kept the two mugs on the table when Felicity chose to speak, “I don’t drink black coffee.” She told him politely, “But thank you Gerry.” The assistant flashed her a smile that said ‘No harm done.’ Before he made his way back outside, this time holding one mug of coffee instead of two.

Oliver had a weird expression on his face and Felicity supposed it was due to the fact that he ordered her the wrong beverage.

But he didn’t know her, did he?

A lot had changed over the years.

Suddenly, the iPhone ringtone resonated in the large cabin and Felicity saw Oliver’s lips curl up before he answered, “Hey Laurel.”

As she stood beside the shelf, her eyes fixed themselves on the books-refusing to acknowledge his presence.

Indeed.

A lot had changed over the years.

**xxx**

**_Seven Years Ago_ **

_Felicity’s lifestyle had changed._

_And it was a drastic change._

_She woke up at six-slept late at night. Was on her laptop almost 24x7 and black coffee practically ran in her veins._

_The real world was painful_

_And exhausting._

_She remembered her small little self wishing she could grow up and be carefree._

_But children are stupid._

_Adults are never carefree._

_She learned that lesson when she escaped school._

_Then MIT happened._

_Which was tougher._

_But compared to real life?_

_Nothing._

_She chewed on her red pen as she read the file that her supervisor had dropped on her desk an hour ago._

_“Felicity?”_

_She whipped her head, her feet moving involuntarily as she pushed the floor, gaining momentum-her chair swinging to turn and face the occupant._

_Swinging chair._

_Probably the most favourite part of her job._

_“Oliver?” She mumbled, pulling the pen out of her mouth, “What are you doing here?”_

_He grinned at her, “I came here to pick you up.”_

_She frowned. “For what?”_

_“I’m taking you out on lunch,” He spoke, “Laurel is out with Sara and Tommy went on a trip with his dad.”_

_Felicity furrowed her eyebrows, not recognizing the names but she focused on some other part of the sentence, “Me? Lunch with you?” She squeaked in surprise and Oliver nodded, “Yes, you.” He stared at her._

_“Oliver-“_

_“It’s your break, Felicity.” Oliver told her, “I am bored and you are free. Isn’t that our moral duty as a friend to help me?”_

_Felicity’s eyebrows rose, “We’re friends?”_

_“Yes, friends.” Oliver looked at her, “Besides, you hit me with a frying pan, you owe me lunch.” Oliver laughed and Felicity giggled along, “You are never going to let that one go, are you?”_

_“Never.” Oliver told her, “Now, come on.” He said and Felicity shook her head, “As much as I‘d love to Oliver, I can’t.”_

_“It’s your lunch break!” Oliver moved his hands in exaggeration. He moved inside her cubicle and promptly pushed her chair, “Come on! You are new to Starling, I’ll show you the best diner in the city.” And Felicity moved her head against the head support of the seat, her neck arching as she looked at him, “Only half an hour.”_

_“Half an hour it is.” Oliver agreed and Felicity sighed before getting up._

_Later, Felicity thinks that getting a job at Queen Consolidated hadn’t only changed her lifestyle._

_It had changed her life._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the love! xx
> 
> Srishti! :)


	7. Life As We Know It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Betaed my @Spn_freakSaumya and @Kzava . They made my job so much easier! :)

**"Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional."**

**Chapter Six : Life as we know it.**

Felicity grinned to herself as she opened the door to the diner. She could hear the light tingle that ricocheted across the small diner that was full of people.

Big Belly Burger.

Ah, she loved it so much.

She remembered when she first shifted to Starling City and Oliver introduced her to this awesome burger place and she couldn't help but agree with all the people-this place was the definition of amazing.

She wished Central City had one too.

Walking towards the counter, her eyes wondered trying to locate a familiar face. John did say she was still working here but as a manager. Over the years, her hard work had paid off and she had been promoted.

Felicity couldn't be happier.

She looked past the employees that were wearing their uniforms before someone stopped right in front of her, on the other side of the counter.

"Can I help you?" the blonde guy looked at her, flashing his charming smile to her as she acknowledged it by returning the gesture. "Can I help you with something?" He repeated again.

"Uh, actually-" She was cut short by another voice, "When Lyla told me you were back in town I almost didn't believe her."

She pivoted her heard towards the source of the voice and her lips curled up, "Carly!" She said and the said woman walked through the small space beside the counter that led her to the dining area.

The two woman smiled at each other before sharing a hug. Felicity grinned at Carly, "Manager, huh?"  Carly shot her a look, "Well, it was either that or resignation. I have been working my ass off for five years," She laughed and Felicity nodded.

"Too bad you weren't there when that happened." She looked at her and Felicity sighed, "I missed you too."

"Yeah," Carly nodded, "I am still angry with you for not keeping in contact with me though." She stated and Felicity felt a twinge of guilt before she spoke, "I only talked to John and dad, Carly. We didn't even talk about anyone else here. It took me almost a year to talk to them. Even Lyla, are talks weren't frequent. I guess I just wanted a-"

"You wanted a life away from this." Carly understood, "I get it. When Andy died, I had pushed everyone away too." She empathized, "But now I realize I had been wrong." She added, "Pushing away someone is never the answer."

And Felicity couldn't help but agree.

Didn't she know it?

"Anyways," Carly initiated the change in the topic, "Why don't you grab a seat and order us something. I'll be back in five minutes," Felicity jiggled her head as a yes and Carly started to walk away.

A second later, Felicity heard her voice once again. This time it was soft, almost gentle, "I'm sorry about Robert."

And Felicity smiled ruefully, "So am I."

….

It had been more than fifteen minutes.

Not that Felicity blamed Carly or anything. She had always been really hardworking. Over the years, Oliver and she had gotten accustomed to visiting Big Belly Burger every now and then and she always used to be the one to serve them.

Plus she was Diggle's sister-in-law slash his ex-girlfriend.

Yeah, complicated history but never the less the Diggle family had moved past that. Lyla and Carly were good friends as a matter of fact.

She pressed the side button of her phone and it flashed telling her the time. It was quarter to eleven and she bit her lip as she waited for Carly. It was their third day as the CEO duo and Felicity realized that they had their first meeting of the day scheduled at one.

She had ample of time.

Having been bored enough she stood up and walked towards the board that was placed on the wall. The board was familiar. It had a tons of pictures pinned on it. Pictures full of people enjoying their time at Big Belly Burger. It was what Felicity used to call the 'Memory Board'

Her eyes flickered as she caught a picture of Oliver and herself on the board. She almost gasped in surprise as she realized that the picture was still there.

The two were leaning against each other, smiling brightly at the camera. It didn't help that the two were also drenched in coke and she remembered laughing her ass off later on. Followed by skipping the other half of her job that day.

She turned away.

….

**Seven Years Ago**

_Felicity moved her fingers faster as she realized her lunch break had started. Her fingers moved vigorously against the keyboard as her eyes flickered towards the clock, realizing it was two ten and she cursed under her breath in the best way she could._

_Fifty seconds later her phone started ringing. She almost laughed to herself at the timing as she finally closed the window and then promptly turned off her computer._

_She fumbled for a second before finally picking up her phone, "I'm coming! I'm coming!" She ranted as she cleaned her desk a little bit before placing her bag on her chair. She pulled out her clutch wallet from her bag before picking her coat._

_She promptly exited out of her cubicle and tried to ignore the smug grins that her female friends flashed her as she left the IT department._

_"You're late." He stated simply and Felicity could practically picture him pouting, "I'm almost there, Oliver." She told him as the lift reached the ground floor and she ran in her black heels as fast as she could._

_Her hand still clutched the phone against her ear, "I'm waiting." He answered her back and Felicity rolled her eyes, "Stop whining like a kid. I can hear you pouting through the phone." She laughed as she tried to put on her purple coat over her red triangle cut out dress. She moved her phone to the other ear as she moved her hand in the sleeve of the coat, her clutch placed in the arm pit of the other arm._

_"I don't pout."_

_Felicity grinned, "You do."_

_Before he could reply back, they saw each other. Oliver promptly hung up before waving his hand in the air, his lips curling up to form a goofy smile._

_She smiled to herself before walking towards him. "Hey,"_

_"Hey back," Oliver answered, "You're late."_

_"I have a job." She countered back, "Besides, I am super hungry." She sounded like a child, "Come on, I'll pay."_

_Oliver rolled his eyes as he followed her inside Big Belly Burger._

….

_They sat inside the diner, opposite each other, waiting for the waiter to approach them. "Tired?" Oliver asked her and Felicity sighed as she leaned her head against the table, a puff of air escaping her lips, "I'm okay."_

_Okay, maybe she was a little tired. She blamed not having coffee in the morning. Stupid machine._

_She ignored it._

_But Oliver could see it._

_He was a great friend._

_Sometimes she wanted to pinch herself. It had been almost a month since she had met Oliver Queen and three weeks since they had been having lunch together. At first it was only for a couple of days, since Tommy wasn't there with him and Laurel was at CNRI usually._

_She almost felt like a third wheel but she couldn't say no to him._

_Before she realized it became a habit. Meeting and having lunch with Oliver was now in her daily schedule. Felicity had a half an hour break and they utilized it to the full extent._

_That is when the realization hit her._

_They were friends._

_He talked about how his dad was after him to take over the company and how Laurel wanted him to stand up on his feet and do the same._

_He told her about how much it annoyed the hell out of him and made him believe that he wasn't good enough._

_She talked about her job and her life in Vegas and at MIT._

_He liked that she didn't judge him._

_She liked that he listened to her._

_It had only been three weeks but it felt like months._

_They met almost every day._

_They chatted on phone every day._

_Sometimes he was busy with Laurel._

_She didn't mind. She remembered the woman that had graced her doorstep a while ago, she wasn't just Laurel. No no, she was gorgeous-straight out of dreams- I want to make world a better place-Laurel. A young lawyer, who was really pretty and Felicity could see why Oliver was with her._

_She had flashed her a smile telling her she was happy that Oliver had found himself a friend._

_The smile felt forced._

_The situation was awkward._

_Felicity chose not to tell Oliver._

_"Hey," Oliver whispered and Felicity looked up. "If you are really that tired we could do this another time." He suggested and Felicity shook her head, "I'm alright." She flashed him a smile and Oliver smiled back, "I ordered for us." He told her and Felicity realized that she had been so lost with her thoughts that she didn't even hear him._

_"Okay." She spoke and a second later she whipped her head towards the side to see two large-like mega large jugs of coke coming towards them._

_"Oliver..?" Her voice trailed off, her tone questioning as she stared at the two jugs that had just now been placed on her table._

_She saw Oliver flash a thumbs up to the waiter and her eyebrows rose. "What's going on?" She said, "I'm really hungry," she whined and before she knew it, two burgers were placed on her table._

_Oliver moved the jug towards her. "You know what can cure fatigue?" He asked rhetorically and Felicity smiled, "Go on."_

_"Caffeine." He continued and Felicity stopped him, "You do realize I live on coffee, right?"_

_Oliver rose his index finger in the air before speaking, "And a good friend."_

_Felicity grinned._

_Oliver pushed one jug in her direction and she looked at him, eyes wide. "Let's have a drink."_

_Felicity laughed, "Did you forget that I'm paying for this?" She took off her coat, trying to get more comfortable. Besides, she knew she would spill the liquid so might as well take it off._

_Oliver simply laughed, "Last one to finish pays." He spoke, "We start at three."_

_"Competition." Felicity mock glared at him, "It's on, Queen."_

_Oliver counted till three before the two begin gulping down the liquid._

_Felicity could feel some part of the liquid falling down and trailing down her dress. Any other time she would have grimaced but not today. She was having way too much fun to bother_

_Oliver was no different either. She could see his clothes getting introduced to coke too.  Having reached her saturation point, Felicity moved the jug away as she gulped the beverage inside her mouth._

_But Oliver kept on drinking._

_Felicity's eyes widened._

_She whacked his jug which caused it to move and eventually causing most of the coke to fall on Oliver._

_On his jeans._

_Felicity's mouth parted open as she laughed and Oliver mock glared at her and before she could realise her face was hit by coke._

_He flung the coke at her._

_Oliver flung the coke at her._

_Felicity was shocked._

_She could the sticky liquid on her face, in her hair. She could feel the strands of her hair sticking on her forehead but she didn't care._

_She started laughing hysterically before flinging her coke in his direction._

_When the manager approached them, she was 100% sure that this was going to be their last day in Big Belly vicinity. They were so going to be kicked out_

_But to their utmost surprise he asked them for a picture & they couldn't deny._

_They laughed harder._

_It was a good day._

_It was a great day._

_They laughed, enjoyed and ate. Lots and lots of food._

_She didn't go back to Queen Consolidated._

_He didn't go back to Laurel._          

…

Oliver walked out of the mansion, Diggle in tow.

His leather shoes hit the pavement producing slight thuds, before turning around and looking at John, "Did you know she worked with Palmer?"

Diggle was caught off guard as Oliver frowned at him. This has been the question that had been plaguing his mind since the time Felicity informed him. He knew that she was close to Diggle, "Did you?"

Diggle let out a breathy laugh as if he expected this, "I did, Oliver."

"How come you didn't tell me?"

"Really Oliver?" Diggle asked rhetorically, "Something tells me that you don't like it when Felicity is brought up." He paused "It was on the news too. How come you didn't see it?"

Oliver shrugged. But Diggle knew the answer. His family had always been trying to push Felicity away. After they divorced, he had become depressed and his family had taken the initiative of cutting him off from anything related to Felicity.

He snorted.

"You knew she was coming to the funeral too, didn't you?"

Diggle nodded, "When Jean called, I picked up the phone. She was coming,"

Suddenly Oliver's voice rose, "And you didn't tell us?"

"I didn't." His answer was crisp, "You and I both know Oliver what your family would have done if they knew she was arriving."

"That wasn't your call to make."

"Not telling her about your father's death wasn't your call to make either."

"Will you just let that go?" Oliver seethed.

John breathed deeply. "That is what has been my mistake since the beginning Oliver. Letting it go. I should have stopped you the minute you walked out on her. "

Oliver rolled his eyes, "She deserved it, Digg! You know it." He snarled before he moved his left hand forward, "Give me the keys. I'm driving today."

"With that hand?" John laughed dryly, "You can fool anyone Oliver, but not me." He spoke and Oliver rolled his eyes. The other day when he crushed the glass, it had left two gashes on his hand. He chose not to tell Laurel or others as a matter of fact. It would have raised questions from the media and his family and they would have fretted over him. No, he wasn't going to tell them.

Besides, he was okay.

It didn't hurt much.

"Give me the keys." Oliver's jaw ticked as he almost growled. John rolled his eyes before shoving the keys in his hand. "Then don't cry like a baby when it’ll hurt."

Diggle saw Oliver gritting his teeth as he muttered something before leaving.

"When will he ever learn?"

…

 

Felicity hated her life.

She had been sulking in front of the diner for the past twenty minutes.

Twenty minutes

Why can't you get a cab when you need one?

She kicked herself mentally for telling Ray that she'll manage on her own today. She almost contemplated calling John.

Stupid cab service.

A few minutes later, a black Bentley stopped in front of her and Felicity felt her blue polka dot dress going in different directions as it happened. She frowned, expecting some hotshot personality to pop out of the car but instead the window rolled down and she found Oliver smirking at her.

"Need a ride?" he looked at her. His left hand lay on the steering wheel as he looked at her.

Felicity scowled, "From you? Never."

Oliver narrowed his eyes, "Who says I was offering?" His right eyebrow rise, "I am pretty sure I would end up crashing the vehicle if you would sit beside me." he chuckled.  "Oh really? I'm sure with your horrendous driving the possibility of that happening is in the near future." Felicity stomped as she started to walk away. "Idiot," she muttered.

Oliver tried to control his grin as he changed the gear. He hissed for a split second as his injured hand touched the gear box before shaking his head.

His eyes flickered towards the rear view mirror where he could see Felicity's reflection. He stopped the car at the curb, his blue eyes looking at the mirror as he watched Felicity waiting for a cab.

Felicity waved her arm in the air for the umpteenth time that day.

She was tired and frustrated.

Plus Oliver.

But it seemed that God had answered her prayers and a second later a cab did stop. She almost squealed before opening the door to the cab and moving inside.

Oliver watched the yellow cab go past his car and he sighed to himself as he started his car.

He was just looking out for her.

As a colleague, he had to remind himself.

Nothing else.

_Nothing else._

…

Oliver sighed as he leaned against his plush chair. Felicity entered the cabin as she looked at him, "Did you talk to Walter?" Her hands were clutching a file. It was almost three, the meeting had just finished.

They had just talked regarding the Applied Sciences along with the head of the said department and a few other people. They were naming it after Robert Queen and had planned to execute a cogeneration project. That way they can help the company and the city.

Oliver nodded, his eyes still closed-his head against the chair, "He said he wanted us together so that we can co-ordinate well, " He could hear Felicity scoff at that, "I told him that it is not possible with the two of us,"

Felicity nodded, understanding, "What did you say?" She said as she placed the red file on the table and picked out a pen from the pen stand. She flipped the pages, her hands moving as she signed them.

"I told them it wasn't possible. So, he said that you'll have a cabin too. On this floor only. He's going to shift one of the employees on a different floor." Felicity frowned, "Isn't this place big enough to accommodate all of us? This is a big building."

She didn't want anyone to face a problem.

Oliver opened his eyes, "Stop thinking about the employee. Walter said he was planning that way before we approached them. He's an accountant, so it makes sense if he is near the CFO. And the person whose cabin he'll be occupying is now going to handle the Moscow branch." The lines on Felicity’s forehead began to fade, “Just stop worrying.” Oliver sighed.

Felicity let out a deep breath as she moved the file towards the left where Oliver was sitting, "Sign it." She mumbled to him and Oliver looked at her, "What are these for?"

"Papers to name the Applied Sciences after dad," She answered and her gaze flickered towards the Robert Queen picture they had placed on the shelf two days ago. It was her decision.

It was his company after all.

Oliver nodded as he straightened himself up. Felicity walked out of the cabin before stopping in front of the desk of the assistants. She bent down and pulled out a mug from underneath the desk. The two assistants had been with them throughout the meeting and Oliver and she had decided to finally give them a break, they deserved one.

She bit her lip as if thinking before opening the door to the cabin and leaning in. She could see Oliver reading the papers and she could see how much had he grown over the years. She remembered when he took the decision to lead his father's company. It had taken years for him to agree to this and Felicity had been proud of him.

Verdant or Queen Consolidated.

She had always been proud of him.

Always.

"Do you need coffee?" Oliver looked up and his eyes narrowed, almost in a playful gesture, "Your stony expression makes me feel that you are going to add poison to it."

"I just might."

Oliver bent his head a little as if acknowledging her response, "In that case, no."

Felicity rolled her eyes as she exited.

At least she tried.

…

Felicity held the coffee mug as she reached the cabin. She frowned in an instant as she saw past the glass door.

Oliver was leaning on the desk, waving his hand in the air frantically. She could see him blow air on his hand. His pen lay on the table and Felicity was sure something was wrong with his right hand. He most probably had cut it.

In the morning too, he was driving with his left hand. Felicity didn't think of it much at that point because Oliver usually did drive with his left hand on the wheel. His right hand was usually in hers.

She tried not to think about it.

She sighed as she placed the hot beverage on the desk that belonged to Gerry and Evelyn. Bending down completely, she fiddled with the drawers. She pulled out the box that had a big plus sign on it, the words First Aid etched on the top.

She got up, one hand clutching the mug while the other held the first aid box. She pushed the door with the help of her shoulders, her both hands holding objects.

He looked up in an instant before frowning as he saw her holding the medical kit. She placed it right in front of it, "Here," She started, "Clean the wound before. There must be betadine in there. Take a cotton swab and apply it."

"I know how to do it," Oliver rolled his eyes, "I don't need it."

"You can't even sign the damn papers, "Felicity retorted, "Just shut up and do it."

Oliver scowled at her opening his mouth before closing it. He knew she was right. He could at least apply some cream right? It would ease the pain though.

But the woman needed to stop being authoritative, "I'm doing it. But you need to stop ordering around. I'm not your husband anymore."

Felicity flashed a forced smile, "I know."

_I'm not your husband anymore_.

Yeah, she knew.

…

Oliver cursed again as he tried again to open the bottle of the antiseptic liquid. He hit his left hand in frustration at his failed attempt to open the bottle again.

He couldn't even open it.

He blamed the bottle.

It was new and the bottle cap was so tight. He couldn't open it with his left hand. He could hear Felicity letting out a puff of air, clearly in frustration as she swung her chair in his direction and took the bottle from him clearly seeing his struggle. She opened the bottle in two seconds though it did take some effort on her part.

She had her poker face on as she moved her hand, "Give me your hand." And Oliver looked at her as if she had grown two heads. "Oliver, the sooner you the sign the papers. The sooner we are done with work. Give me your hand,"

Oliver sighed as he gave him her hand.

Felicity opened his palm, her eyes widening at the site of two deep cuts, "Oliver! These cuts are so deep, you need a dressing!"

"I don't-"

"Just shut up for once," She told him and her head moved as she picked out the cotton followed by a cream from the box.

"How did you get hurt?"

Oliver looked away, "Felicity-"

"How did you get hurt?" And Oliver finally looked into her blue eyes. He could see-what he thought was concern ...for him. He blinked again and finally answered. His voice was soft this time, "I crushed a glass."

"In anger. Over me," Felicity added, "You were drinking weren't you?" She quirked her eyebrows, "How many times have I told you that hitting and crushing things is never the answer," She continued, "One of these days you are going break your hand."

She looked at him and squeezed his hand lightly very softly. Her fingers ran over his cut and Oliver shivered lightly.

God, he felt like a girl.

It had been a while since they had been this close. Their chairs touched each other's, his hand lying in hers.

He almost felt overwhelmed with emotion. It seemed like he had lost track of what was happening. Or maybe a small part of him did have a clue but he let the former dominate.

"Did you take the glass out?" She asked again and Oliver nodded, "I did."

"Good," She answered as she pulled the cotton out before lightly dabbing it with antiseptic liquid. She rubbed the cotton softly over the cut and Oliver flinched in pain, "Sorry, sorry." She whispered softly as she leaned down and blew some air over the cut.

Oliver kept staring at her.

…

**Seven Years Ago**

_Oliver kept staring at her._

_Felicity wasn't aware of this fact as her attention was focused somewhere else. She dipped the cloth in hot water because placing it on his forehead, right above his cut._

_She lightly blew air over it, just so it didn't hurt him. "You shouldn't have done that," She whispered softly as she abandoned the cloth and then reached for the cream that was in her first aid box. Oliver sat on the toilet seat, his eyes at her._

_"He was touching you," He declared simply and Felicity flashed him a soft smile, "Thank you." She spoke, "But you should have gone with Laurel. I could have handled him."_

_Laurel._

_Of course she would talk about her._

_It was supposed to be a club night. Oliver wanted Felicity to meet Tommy and Laurel. But then Felicity told him she had already met Laurel, they were neighbours after all. Still though, he planned this evening._

_And it started brilliantly. Felicity looked gorgeous in the short golden dress and hair was left loose, curls moving past her shoulders. He had to blink twice. Felicity had always been gorgeous. But tonight,_

_She looked hot._

_Not that she wasn't before but today, it was wow._

_He had told Tommy about her and he was excited about meeting her too._

_The night was going well._

_Until Laurel told him that she wanted to go back home. Oliver wanted to say no because he wanted to spend time with Felicity and Tommy and so he did say no._

_Laurel had scowled at him and then left._

_God knows he was glad that he stayed or else someone would have hurt Felicity. Tommy was drunk so he hadn't been that much of a help. The guy was trying to touch Felicity and Oliver punched him hard._

_Oliver didn’t regret it. That jerk deserved it._

_"There," Felicity said as she pulled away. She pressed her fingers against his forehead again and made sure that the white bandage tape, "All done." She grinned at him._

_Oliver was still staring at her._

_"Oliver," Felicity started, "Are you alright? I think the head wound did something," She laughed lightly and Oliver finally snapped out of his thoughts and smiled at her._

_"Why is it that every time I come to your house, I end up hurt?" He asked playfully and Felicity placed her finger on her chin as if thinking, "Maybe it is God's way of telling you to stop ruining my life and leave me alone." She said, her tone light and Oliver laughed._

_The two got out of the bathroom only to find Tommy lying on the couch, dozing off. He was still wearing his shoes, his hair messy as ever as he snored softly._

_"Sorry about tonight, "Oliver apologized and Felicity looked at him, "What?"_

_"Tonight. It was supposed to be a good night. And then Laurel left and then the guy and now Tommy-I'm sorry."_

_"Laurel is a grown woman," Felicity spoke, "It was her choice to leave. Besides I want to hit you for that, you should have gone after her."_

_Oliver looked at her, surprised._

_"Leaving you?" Oliver bit his lip, why didn't she ever consider herself important enough?_

_"Tommy was there with me," She shrugged, "Which reminds me-you should go meet Laurel." Oliver almost protested, "I know Lance is away so Sara won't mind you there," She spoke, "And Laurel would be really pissed off if she realizes that you stayed here and not there."_

_"I-"_

_"Go," She said softly, "If she kicks you out. I'm here." She laughed and Oliver looked at her, contemplating_

_"Tommy-"_

_"Stays here." She ended before walking towards the door, Oliver in tow. She pushed him lightly, "Go."_

_Oliver sighed as he opened the door. The two stood face to face right in front of the open door. "Thank you." He said and Felicity frowned, "For what? I should be the one thanking you."_

_"For being you," He answered, his voice a whisper and Felicity looked up. She could feel herself turn crimson, "Thank you." She started, "For saving me."_

_Oliver was indeed very grateful. She had been so supportive of him and she encouraged him to make the right choices. He didn't know why he was feeling this way. But there was one thing that bothered him. Time and again he saw Felicity putting Laurel before herself, and sometimes it hurt him to see that she thought so low of herself? That she thinks that she was not as important as Laurel for him._

_He was glad they were friends. He could be himself with her and she was a great person, helping him every time he needed her. She listened to him without any judgement and guided him whenever he felt he was lost.  She was smart and funny and- She was the best and he was so damn lucky to have her in his life. It pained him to see how unaware she was about her importance in his life._

_"Anytime."_

_He walked out of the door and Felicity leaned against the door, still in her golden dress. Oliver turned around and looked at her, "By the way, you looked gorgeous tonight."_

_"Only tonight?" She questioned him and he looked like he was caught off guard before he gained his momentum, "Always. You know, you have that glint in your eyes."_

_Felicity's eyebrows furrowed._

_"A person eyes can speak volumes. You can even wear a paper bag Felicity and still look beautiful because it is your inner beauty that attracts attention." Felicity let out a breathy laugh as she blushed, "You are beautiful."_

_"How many girls have fallen for that?"_

_"Well, considering that I haven't said these words to anyone before, none."_

_Felicity tilted her head, "Not even Laurel?"_

_"Not even Laurel." He spoke and Felicity was caught off guard by the way he was staring at her, "You should go." She said a second later, "Good night Oliver."_

_"Good night Felicity."_

…

Felicity wrapped his hand with a bandage. She finally tied the knot and then looked up.

Their faces were inches apart. She could feel his hot breath on her face and she wouldn't admit but a part of her missed this.

A second later she pulled away, "Uh, it's done" she said and she saw Oliver's jaw tick as he realized what had happened. He flashed her a forced smile, "Thank you."

Felicity nodded as she took a deep breath.

_“No,” she thought.  “Stay strong Felicity.”_

Stay Strong.

She placed the things back in the box and closed it before getting up and walking away, the kit in her hand.

"It's weird isn't it? The one who caused me pain is the one who is helping me through it." she heard Oliver say it.

Pain.

He meant something else entirely.

Felicity did not turn around .She took deep breaths as she felt tears cloud her vision. Then she spoke with her voice cracking, "You are lucky, Oliver. This pain- these wounds would heal over time. But there are some wounds in life that no one can heal, no one. Not even you."

She walked out. 

 

 

 

 


	8. Ghost of Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "A brother is a friend God gave you.  
> A friend is brother your heart chose for you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Hope you all like this chapter xD
> 
> Betaed by Saumya and Kamaza. Thank you so much! 
> 
> Disclaimer : I don't own anything that seems familiar.

**Chapter Seven : Ghosts of Memories**

 “And that is how it is done,” Felicity smiled at the supervisor of the IT department as she fixed a major glitch that was plaguing the computers in there. Turns out, it was quite a big issue. One of the employees was rather adventurous when he tried to sneak up on different kinds of porn websites which resulted in a virus being caught up by the software.

And then it spread. Into the entire framework of the systems like the Arizona fire.

It was chaotic and until a day ago Felicity wasn’t even aware which made her feel a tad bit guilty since she was the CEO. The guilt was accompanied by anger at the employees since they should have informed her as soon as the trouble started. Instead, the employees chose to spend one day trying to fix the problem themselves. She appreciated the effort but they should have told her or Oliver.

She looked at the group of employees that had gathered behind her table before pushing her feet against the ground and standing up. “Next time something like this comes up, I-We should be informed first. This time we were lucky that I was able to recover all the data,” she nodded towards the group, trying to sound professional.

The group consisted of all kinds of people. Young, old, men and women-and Felicity did feel a sense of Déjà vu, remembering the time when she worked here.

“Thank you,” said Mr Mason who was the Supervisor. Felicity had made sure to know the names of most of the employees working there in the past one week, trying to make everyone comfortable with her presence. “You are really amazing with computers,” he added.  It had been almost four years since she had left her job here at QC and needless to say, most of the staff had changed.

“You’re welcome,” Felicity grinned slightly at the compliment before she turned to look at the employees. “Be careful from the next time,” Felicity instructed, “If something like this happens you should immediately contact Mr. Queen or me.”

 “Actually don’t contact him. He isn’t really much of a technical expert. The only thing he knows how to operate well is his phone but when it comes to computers he literally doesn’t know anything,” Felicity rambled.  “But you can contact him too. He’s the CEO too.” she muttered at last ending her babbling. She started exiting taking a deep breath as amused smiles were shot towards her from different directions.

She smiled back, trying to kill the awkwardness before she left the room. Well that went well, she thought to herself. She took a deep breath as she entered the lift and pressed the button of the floor where the managing department was there. She might as well get to know about the factories that were installed in various parts of the city if she wanted to do this CEO thing with Oliver.

She leaned against the bright yellow wall as she waited for the floor to come.

Being a CEO is tiresome.

Like really tiresome.

….

“So, you fixed the problem?” Oliver asked her the minute she entered the cabin. She nodded her head before speaking up, “I also went in to check most of the departments which by the way is your job too.”

“You were the one who was eager to be the CEO, right?” Oliver asked her, “Now pay the price.”

“I am working with you, aren’t I. Trust me, I already am paying.” Felicity told him as she reached her seat and swung it before sitting on it.

“Did you read about Isabel Rochev?” she asked him as she reached for the red file that was kept on her table. The front page showcased all the details about Stellmoor International, the company they currently wanted to deal with followed by the pictures of their current vice president, Isabel Rochev, “She looks scary in every picture.” Felicity murmured as she flipped the pages.

Oliver looked at her, his eyebrows hiking up, “It’s almost like she knows she is going to meet you.”

Felicity scowled at him as she snapped the file close before she threw it on the table. She sighed the next minute before closing her eyes and placing her head on the head rest.

She was so done with him.

Two minutes later, she heard Oliver sigh before he spoke up, “You checked the cabin?”  Felicity nodded, her eyes still closed. “Five more days” she mumbled “Just five more days.” It had been four days since they had approached Walter and probably three days since they had started renovating the new cabin for Felicity.

She had said no to the renovation since she didn’t want to cause any inconvenience for Walter but he disagreed saying that the cabin should look like it belonged to the CEO. In not a coincident, her cabin was adjacent to Oliver’s. Felicity wondered how intimidating it must have been for the previous owner of the cabin to sit in a cabin right beside the CEO. Because she knew it was no easy feat.

It was a pretty great cabin. It had leather seats just like Oliver’s cabin which Felicity believed was awesome since they were super comfortable. The only thing that lacked was the awesome view that Oliver’s cabin had and it was smaller, because, duh-not the CEO cabin.

She almost felt envious.

The only thing separating the two cabins was a mahogany coloured wall. The most significant difference between the two cabins was that since Felicity was occupying a normal cabin, she didn’t have the booth that is usually occupied by the assistants. Gerry would still sit in front of Oliver’s cabin which wasn’t much of a problem since the cabins were adjacent.

Felicity would take whatever she gets.

She just didn’t want to share a cabin with Oliver. Though the duo was civil to each other occasionally most of the times it was reminiscing old times condescendingly coupled with sharp words.

It was painful.

And it was weird.

They were better off apart. So much better off apart

Oliver’s phone rang and he picked it up. Sighing, he held the phone in his right hand and Felicity noticed that someone had redressed his wound and her lips curled up ever so slowly.

“Hey Speedy,” he greeted his sister who was on the other side of the phone.

_“Ollie, there is an architect here who says you called her.”_

A shadow crossed Oliver’s face as he realized he had forgotten about it, “I did. You remember we were planning to add another VIP lounge in the club?” he spoke, “I called her to talk about it.”

_“Well, you should come too, then.” Thea told him. “Tommy is busy flirting with her,” she continued, “So you might as well come handy since we are already down a member.”_

Oliver looked at his wrist watch as he realized that it was lunch break.  “It is lunch break, so I’ll be there,” he told Thea.

_“Why can’t you skip today? Felicity could do it.” Thea said, “The woman could do something productive for once.”_

Oliver saw Felicity’s grip tighten on the paperweight she was holding and it made him realize that she could actually hear them. Her expression had faltered slightly and Oliver moved in his seat involuntarily.

Felicity stiffened.

“I can’t Thea,” he said before seeing Felicity shaking her head at him from the corner of his eyes and Oliver frowned before pulling away from the phone. “Go, I am leaving too.” she told him and he moved his eyebrows up in the gesture as if asking ‘what?’

“I already took a round across the building and there aren’t any more meetings scheduled for today. So you can go.” she said before standing up.

Oliver mumbled something to Thea that was incoherent to Felicity. She shrugged it off and moved her hand across the table to fetch her bag. “Where are you going?” her eyes narrowed ever so slightly behind her glasses as she looked at Oliver before answering, “House hunting.”

“Again?” and Felicity was caught off guard. “Wait, how do you know I have been at it for days?” she questioned him but Oliver didn’t back down as he stared at her. “You can’t choose a house in a day, Felicity,” he answered and Felicity shot him a sceptic look before looking away. “Besides, with the list of demands that you carry while buying a house, it will take time,” Oliver added sarcastically.

“I don’t have a list of demands.”

“Actually,” Oliver finally stood up, his lips turned up ever so slightly. His right eyebrow moving up and Felicity internally groaned as she saw that. It was his fun smile. Great, now he was trying to push her buttons. “You’re right. You don’t have a list of demands. You have a list of silly demands,” Oliver chuckled.

“No, I don’t,” she protested.

“Checking if the house is haunted or not, that’s silly.” Oliver told her as he walked past her and she followed, her black heels hitting the ground and making soft thuds as they exited the office.  “It is not silly,” Felicity could feel herself turn red with embarrassment. “It is especially when ghosts don’t actually exist, Felicity,” Oliver added while smirking.

Felicity looked at his back as she walked behind him.  “Especially when ghosts don’t actually exist,” she said while imitating him, “What are you then?”

Felicity mentally face palmed her after this lame comeback. She clearly wasn’t an expert in trash talk.

“What?” Oliver turned instantly and collided with Felicity who was walking behind him. “Ow,” she yelped as her head collided with his firm chest. Her hand rubbing her forehead while cursing, “Stupid muscly che-“she stopped short when she felt his fingers move over her hand and Felicity immediately opened her eyes. “Did I hurt you?” Oliver asked, his eyes filled with genuine concern.

Oliver’s hand touched Felicity’s for a split second but he pulled his hand back the minute she looked at him, her eyes wide. Blue met blue and suddenly, a simple situation turned into much more. He took a step back and Felicity took this as her cue as she walked past him. Just like that the moment was over.

Oliver shook his head before letting out a frustrated huff, his teeth gnashing together. He sighed, trying to calm himself down.

Dammit!

“Sir?” Oliver opened his eyes before gritting his teeth, “What?” he all but barked. It was harsh and a second later, he did realise what had happened as he looked at Gerry. “What is it Gerry?“ he asked again. It was softer this time, almost tired.

“Are you leaving too?” Gerry asked him and Oliver nodded before replying, “Yes.” The assistant took this as his cue and left. Oliver fiddled with his coat pocket for a second before his bandaged hand found the phone.

He was about to call Diggle when he saw some workers approaching the cabin that was being made.

Okay, it wasn’t the workers that caught his attention-it was what they _held._

“She still has that picture,” he almost murmured to himself as he saw the photo frame with the picture he once cherished.

 A second later as the picture went out of sight, he snapped out of his thoughts. His eyes were almost glossy as he held the phone before pressing the speed dial number for John.

_Stop thinking about it_ , he mentally told himself before he tried to focus on the situation at hand.

Verdant.

Yeah, yeah.

He needed to be there.

…

**Six and a Half Years Ago**

_He needed to be there._

_That was honestly the first thing that popped up in his head the minute he exited the house._

_He drove faster as he reached for his phone. He even shouted at John! Goddammit, what was wrong with him?_

_Sometimes being rich sucked._

_He changed the car’s gear before gritting his teeth and swung the steering wheel. He reached his destination within ten minutes which usually took half an hour-that is how fast he was. He headed for the stairs straight away, ignoring the lift that he knew would take some time in approaching the ground floor._

_His feet moved faster than ever as he panted lightly before reaching her floor._

_He ran across the hallway before pressing the doorbell to her house. The door had the name plate ‘Felicity Smoak’ on it and a faint memory hit him of him and Tommy trying to fix it on the door._

_That was a good day._

_He rang the bell repeatedly and he could hear her fiddling on the other side of the door before she opened the door. She was putting her glasses on as she opened the door, her voice close to her loud one as she spoke, “Who is it?”_

_He knew he woke her up._

_A part of him felt guilty. It was almost one after all._

_But at the moment he needed her._

_“Oliv-“She was cut short as Oliver flung himself at her and hugged her tightly. Caught off guard, Felicity simply blinked for a few seconds. She finally gained her senses as she felt Oliver’s hands on her back and she swore she stopped breathing for a split second._

_She closed her eyes as she felt him hug her tighter and then she hugged him back._

_It was their first hug._

_Honestly, it felt perfect. Now, Felicity has always been a vivid thinker and even though she would not admit if asked out loud but she always wondered how it would feel to hug Oliver. Now she knew._

_Oliver was not a person who hugged everyone. The only person Felicity ever saw him hugging was his sister._

_She always imagined what it would feel like to wrap her arms around his broad shoulders, to breathe in against his chest, to touch his amazingly hot body so close. And in her wildest dreams she even saw him shirtless-not that Felicity had seen him shirtless even though she wanted to but alas, she hadn’t._

_Great, now she sounded like a creepy stalker._

_She got distracted from her thoughts when she felt Oliver letting out a puff of air and his arms tightened. Now that Felicity thought about it, it was almost intimate. But she didn’t care. She moved her head on his shoulder, relishing the feeling. “Are you okay?” she tried to ask him, her voice soft and Oliver mumbled, “Just don’t let go.” Felicity agreed, not knowing what to say._

_Few moments later, Oliver moved away. And Felicity could feel the gust of cold wind hit her and she missed the warm feeling of his hug._

_And then the awkwardness kicked in. They were friends-so, what was that? Oliver fumbled for words, figuring out what to say.  “Uh, I don-“Felicity knew it was going to be awkward and she sure as hell didn’t want him to be uncomfortable around her._

_Not when he needed a friend._

_“What’s wrong?” She chose to say instead and when she didn’t get a reply, she looked up. Oliver was staring at her. His gaze was sincere and she almost felt goose bumps on her skin before her natural instinct kicked in, she felt self-conscious. It took a few moments to realise she was still in her PJs. Her hair haphazard, her face make up free._

_She had probably scared him._

_She could feel herself turning red as she spoke, “I should go change.”_

_She turned around._

_Well, almost. Oliver immediately reached for a hand and Felicity pivoted her head in his direction as he whispered, “Don’t go.”_

_Felicity frowned. Ignoring the feeling of butterflies doing somersaults inside her stomach, she tried to focus on the situation at hand._

_She moved forward and pushed the door with her right hand, her left still clutched in Oliver’s._

_“What’s wrong?” She whispered softly and Oliver looked into her eyes. “What happened?”_

_“I just-“ Oliver started. He bit his lip, his brows coming together as he blinked rapidly, “I just feel so angry,” He paused, “And confused.”_

_He came here because he knew she would calm him down. That she would listen and talk to him instead rather than thrashing his opinion. She would help him and that is exactly what she did._

_Felicity smiled reassuringly as she encouraged him to speak. She didn’t want to force him. The two sat on the couch and Felicity finally squeezed his hand that was clutched in hers asking him silently to continue. “Dad wants me to join the company. But I don’t want to. He wants me to stand up on my feet and I know I am not a good son and I party and I am reckless-but I can’t help it” he said it in one go and Felicity simply looked at him._

_Oliver continued._

_“Laurel thinks the same way and it is frustrating!” he told her and Felicity could see that his anger had resurfaced._

_“What do you want?” she finally whispered in a soft voice and Oliver looked up, his eyes meeting hers as he answered honestly, “I don’t know.” Felicity let out a breathy laugh as she answered, “That’s normal.” Oliver looked at her in confusion. “Not everyone knows what they are going to do Oliver. Some people go to the best schools, they study most of their lives and yet they don’t know what exactly they want to do. That is completely normal. Sometimes it takes some time to find your true calling,” Felicity explained._

_“But does that mean they don’t want to do anything in life? No, absolutely not.” she fidgeted on the couch for a split second, trying to get comfortable, “See, it isn’t always about carrying the legacy. You can have different choices, a different life. You don’t want to be a part of his company than don’t be. Do something you love.”_

_“It’s better to be good at something else than being a bad businessman.” she ended her side of story. “I don’t how many times I have to tell him no,” Oliver sighed._

_“Then don’t tell it, show it,” she said, “You said it yourself Oliver, you think you are reckless. If you think that about yourself, everyone else will believe the same?” She then patted his chest, “Believe in yourself Oliver and that is when your parents will start believing in you. Ask yourself, where do you see yourself in the next ten years? What is it that you don’t want?”_

_“If you can’t see it then how can you expect them to see it? You know Oliver, you have a great lifestyle but it is not something that you could carry on forever. Now the question is, how soon would you realise that? You don’t have to be a businessman for that, Oliver. Do something you love. Believe in yourself and then, your parents will start believing in you.”_

_Oliver finally whispered the question that has been plaguing his mind since the beginning, “I still don’t know what I want. How do I figure out what do I want?”_

_Felicity grinned, “Well, you know that being a businessman is something you don’t want. That’s progress, right?” She paused, “We’ll start from the beginning. What do you like and don’t like and then we’ll decide further. You’ll decide further. The thing that would be the easiest to envision in the future is the answer. The thing you love the most. Something that clubs passion and work.” She bit her lip, an amused smile crossing her lips as she finally spoke; “I should probably get money for this, Queen,” she told him playfully, “I am an awesome counsellor.”_

_“Thank you,” he said. Felicity nudged his shoulder with her left one, “You’re welcome.” She grinned, “Someone once told me I was great listener.” Oliver smiled lightly as he realized it was he who said it._

_And just like that she grounded him._

_She squeezed his hand before releasing it and Oliver felt his palm come in contact with the cold air as his fingers twitched, missing the warmth. “Now, come on, I’ll make you some hot cocoa,” she told him as she finally got off the couch, “With marshmallows.” she added in the end as she headed towards the open kitchen._

_“Do you have movies?” Oliver asked suddenly & Felicity blinked at his sudden mood change. “Let’s have a movie night? That is if you don’t have a problem with it. I just wanted to distract myself and spend some time-“_

_“I have movies.” Felicity stopped his babbling. It was weird not to be the one who was babbling and instead being on the other side of it. “Almost of kind of genres. Romantic, comedy, drama but no horror, yeah definitely no horror. Every time I see a horror movie I get scared in the night and think my house is haunted which I am pretty sure is not since I double checked with the dealer while purchasing it.”_

_“You checked if the house is haunted or not?” Oliver laughed all of a sudden and Felicity almost felt proud of herself for making him do that before she gained her momentum back, “Of course. Haven’t you seen AmityVille Horror? Half of the bad stuff that happens in movies is because of the damn house.”_

_Oliver couldn’t control his laughter and Felicity threw a spoon at him, “Now come help me with this and then we’ll select a movie.” As Oliver grunted and pushed himself off the comfortable furniture, “Pan and then a spoon, what’s next a knife?”_

_“You will never let go of it!” Felicity moved her arms in the air in exaggeration and Oliver shook his head, “Never.”_

_He would never let go of it_

_He never wanted to let go of her._

…

“Come again?” Tommy frowned as he stared at the blonde woman leaned against the table, a pencil clutched in her hand and the blue print of Verdant lying on the table, in front of her. She started scribbling on the paper as she spoke, “I am saying that you want it bigger than the current one or you want this lounge to be the same in size?”

“Same,” he answered and Thea nodded from her seat right beside him. “Otherwise it would be VVIP lounge,” Tommy laughed at his own joke causing Thea to roll her eyes as she turned towards Roy “What do you think, Roy?”

The guy in red nodded at his girlfriend, “Same,”

“So,” Tommy’s voice ricocheted, “Kate,” the woman looked up and Tommy found himself leaning further against the table, trying to be closer to the blonde, “Since you have been working so diligently, I should offer you a drink or two, right?”

Kate flashed him a smile before she finally answered “No.”

Thea couldn’t control the laughter that bubbled out of her lips and Tommy almost felt happy knowing he made her laugh. It wasn’t common these days due to obvious reasons.

They heard another laugh in the small lounge where they were gathered and the four occupants pivoted their heads towards the source only to find Oliver and John approaching towards them. “Hey Ollie,” Thea greeted him, “John.” The two nodded, passing small smiles along her way before joining them.

“So, Kate Manson, right?” Oliver asked her as he sat next to Tommy who shot him a grin, “Yes Sir.” She told him, “As I was telling Mr. Merlyn-“

“Hey,” John whispered to Roy who looked at him, “How is she holding up?” He asked him, his eyes shifting towards Thea.

Roy smiled, “Good.” He told him, “She visits his grave daily. But she is okay. She is coping up just fine.” John nodded.

Good, at least one girl he was supposed to care of was okay.

Now the only one he needed to worry about was Felicity.

….

“I like it,” Felicity told Courtney as the two finally came down the stairs while Ray was inspecting the living room. It was a great house. Townhouse to be pretty specific. The floor was wooden and it almost resembled Felicity’s house back in Central City.

It was small but it consisted of everything Felicity want. It had an open kitchen and two bedrooms-one for her and one for the guests. The walls were furnished and it was in a great condition.

Almost ready to move in.

Felicity wanted it that way.

“You sure?” Ray asked her one last time and Felicity nodded, “Yup, I like it,” she said “Plus it doesn’t have a spooky ghost story.”

Ray looked at her, his eyebrows raised, “What if it does have one, but the dealer didn’t tell you?”

Felicity’s eyes almost widened as she whacked Ray in the chest, “Way to ruin it, Ray.” Courtney laughed before noticing Felicity’s thoughtful face, “Hey, he is just pulling your leg. Don’t think too much.”

“I know that.” She mumbled but her mind was running really fast.

Ah, ghosts really suck.

Her attention snapped and laughter bubbled out of her thought as Ray protested, “Hey!”

“We should leave now.” Felicity suggested a second later, a small smile still on her lips. Courtney nodded, “Yup and then we’ll go shopping.”

Felicity turned her head towards the brunette instantly, “Shopping?”

“Of course. Once we sign the lease for this house we are going out to celebrate.” Courtney cheered and Ray looked at her, “How am I celebrating?”

“By paying the bills, silly.”

“Why do you think we keep you around?” Felicity turned towards her best friend.

Ray rolled his eyes as he started walking, “Come on, we got a deal to fix.”

….

**Six and a Half Years Ago**

_“So, what’s the deal you guys have fixed?”_

_Oliver looked at Felicity whose both eyebrows were risen up as she asked him the question, “Dad agreed to fund the club” he told her and Felicity moved her head, trying to give him the message to continue further, “He liked the entire presentation and he is willing to give it a chance. Although he does have Walter keeping an eye on me so that I don’t mess up.”_

_Felicity grinned at that, “That’s a start, right? How did Tommy’s dad take it?” Oliver made a face at that but nevertheless answered, “He too was happy for Tommy, which was weird because I don’t really remember the last time I saw him smiling. He said he’ll invest in the club if he likes the progress.”_

_“You guys talked-“_

_“We talked to the constructor, interior designer and the architect. We’ve also searched on some other clubs-so we know what we are up against. Like you said, we are looking into every nook and corner. From competition to club development to blue print designing to everything, “ He shot her a grateful smile,” Thank you for everything. The presentation, the nagging, getting us in touch with outside competition. Everything, thank you.”_

_“Since when did you become so formal?” Felicity retorted and Oliver passed her a small genuine smile at that. He really was grateful to her-for the handling the club and more importantly handling_ him.

_“When are you meeting the interior designer and the architect? Actually shouldn’t you meet the architect first? I mean, we should finalize the design before we actually think about interiors. Not that it is wrong to actually the start in the opposite way. Actually,” Felicity paused as if thinking, “Starting the opposite way doesn’t make any sense-“_

_“Fe-li-ci-ty.” Oliver tried to grab her attention as he enunciated her name. Felicity looked at him instantly and almost blushed at the way he said her name._

_He didn’t even give her a nickname, yet it sounded precious. She liked that feeling._

_Yeah, she did._

_“I am meeting the architect first. We have already planned a few areas and how it would look-but we need professional opinion. We just want to talk to designer too since the work can start as soon as the construction begins. With the constructor-we need to just settle some money deals since they are already shaping the basement to be something remotely functional. “_

_“You sound like a true businessman.”_

_Oliver smirked at that, “It’s in my blood.”_

_A second later he spoke, “We have the meetings tomorrow, so you would be there…right?” Felicity was caught off guard by his tone. He was hesitant as if afraid she would say no. “Of course,“ she answered him in an instant and Oliver let out his breath he didn’t even realise he was holding._

_“Good because I need my best friend there.”_

_Felicity leaned against the study table in Oliver’s room as she smirked at him, “I know you do. But it seems like Tommy and you are doing pretty well on your own.”_

_“Well, we had help.” Oliver told her before he paused, “Which we would always need.” He moved his head forward ever so slightly, his blue eyes glinting as he stared at Felicity. Her lips curled up at that._

_“Now, come on, we need to go shopping.”_

_“Shopping?”_

_“Yeah,” Oliver answered, “We need to see some stuff. Wall patterns, crockery, wine glasses-loads. We need some ideas before we talk to the interior designer, don’t you think?”_

_“And I am tagging along?” Felicity pointed towards herself and Oliver nodded at that, “So, the two of us would go together? Not that by together, I mean together-together. I mean, how can we?” She laughed lightly, “You are with Laurel. Gorgeous Laurel-not me, so we can’t be together but we will still be together like friends-“_

_Hey, breathe!” Oliver touched her shoulders & Felicity breathed a sigh of relief at the escape from the embarrassment. At that very moment Tommy walked towards the duo and Felicity knew he had his mischievous smile as he spoke, “Am I interrupting something?”_

_Felicity shook her head almost instantly, “No.”_

_Tommy grinned wider at this, well-if that was even possible, “Just asking.”_

_Oliver’s phone rang and Felicity laughed at the ‘Barbie Doll’ ringtone that resonated in the room. Tommy too dissolved into peals of laughter and Oliver growled under his breath, “Thea.”_

_Felicity couldn’t control her giggles and leaned against Tommy’s chest that was too rumbling with laughter._

_Oliver flashed the two of them an annoyed look before walking towards the corner and picking his cell up._

_Seconds later, Oliver hung up and turned towards them before speaking, “Laurel’s joining us too.”_

_Tommy could swear he saw Felicity’s face fall. He nudged her and she looked at him, her eyes widening as if trying to say ‘What?’_

_Tommy shrugged but didn’t answer even though she could see his mind forming some questions._

_Felicity chose to ignore the current scenario._

_She also chose to ignore the pang she felt in her chest at the mention of Laurel._

_…._

_So, Felicity was alone outside the mall._

_Come to think of it. It had been what, four hours? She honestly expected herself to spend the entire day with ‘dumb and dumber’ as she eloquently quoted the Queen and Merlyn duo._

_It was almost eight at night and Felicity didn’t really mind leaving. Although she could have enjoyed more inside the mall with everyone but being here doesn’t hurt either._

_She can watch all her television shows on time._

_At least that was what she tried to tell herself. She sighed before picking her phone out from the back pocket of her jeans. She went through the contacts, her lips pouting involuntarily as she stared at Oliver’s name._

_Should she call and tell him that she was leaving?_

_But then Laurel would be there._

_And she was sure Tommy would have told Oliver that she had to leave._

_She shook her head before placing the phone back in her pocket._

_A second later someone pulled her arm and she immediately went into alert mode before calming down as she realised it was Oliver._

_“Where were you?” he questioned, rather demanded which made Felicity groan. He had a  tight smile plastered on his face aka what Felicity called his ‘Monkey Face’ .Ooh, he was pissed off._

_Still, she pulled her arm away since the grip had thankfully slackened, not that it was tight before, “I have to leave. I have work tomorrow.”_

_“Really?” Oliver retorted, “Felicity, you said it yourself. You were happy to come. So stop lying. Why are you bailing on me?”_

_Okay, so he caught that._

_What was she supposed to say? That your girlfriend hinted for almost an hour that I should leave before she came off straight to my face and said that I should leave since Oliver doesn’t need her at the moment._

_Yeah, that would go well._

_“I am not bailing on you,” Felicity started, “Tomorrow is Monday, Oliver. You know how much I hate those-so I need to go home and sleep on time and probably have a pint of mint chip because I really hate Mondays.”_

_In the history of her babbling this was the worst babble of all time._

_“No,” Oliver suddenly grabbed her hand and Felicity wanted to pull away but she couldn’t. It was not hurting but it was tight. “You are coming with me inside.”_

_“Oliver!” Felicity shouted all of a sudden as Oliver practically yanked her, “I can’t!”_

_“Can’t or won’t?” Oliver looked at her sharply._

_Felicity chose to ignore that question, “You have Laurel and Tommy there! They’ll help you out. I should leave.”_

_“I want_ your _opinion,” Oliver told her firmly before he pulled her against him. And suddenly Felicity was looking at Oliver closely._

_Like really closely._

_Their faces were close to each and he was staring at her intensely._

_Felicity could feel like thousands of butterflies were fluttering in her stomach._

_The only thing that happened to be separating them was her glasses._

_Honestly, why can’t love stories be ever about a girl who wears glasses?_

_“You are coming with me,” he declared as he let go of her hand and suddenly in a snap the moment broke. Felicity immediately cast her eyes towards the ground, feeling her cheeks turn red. Her body always worked against her._

_It was a second later that her mind registered what he had said. “No, I am not coming with you,” she answered him and she saw Oliver’s jaw tick, “Felicity you are coming with me!”_

_He was shouting._

_“No! Oliver, you don’t need my opinion!” Felicity told her, she was on the verge of her loud voice too. “You have Laurel in there. And Tommy too. You have known them for your entire life. They know you better. Go there!”_

_Oliver growled, “Laurel again?”_

_Why can’t she get it in her head that she was important too._

_Felicity rolled her eyes, “Why not Oliver? She is your girlfriend.” She poked her index finger in his chest, “Which I’m not,” she said, “So you can’t order me around. If I said I’m leaving means I’m leaving.”_

_“Really?” Oliver’s gaze darkened, “Well, that’s a good thing. Because you suck at being a friend, let alone a girlfriend.”_

_Ouch._

_Felicity’s face faltered for a split second before she regained her momentum, “I’m sorry, okay? I know I told you I would help you. But I just want to go home.” Her hands moved involuntarily as if listing her points, “You don’t need me there.” She said, her hand moving in the direction of the mall as she realised how she stupid she looked before hesitatingly pulling it back._

_“I need you!”_

_Felicity closed her eyes at the sound of his voice. He sounded sincere but she couldn’t go inside, could she? She couldn’t jeopardize his relationship._

_Besides, why does he talk like that? It makes her heart flutter._

_Uh._

_“I can’t.” She said simply and Oliver looked at her before he scowled, “Fine. Go. Thank you so much for everything. You know what? I don’t need to consult you anymore. You’re free.”_

_“Oliver,” Felicity said instinctively. She didn’t expect him to be this way, “Don-“_

_“Just go,” He said, “Don’t call me. I can handle stuff without you. You’re right, Laurel’s my girlfriend. Tommy’s my best friend, “ He paused before speaking, “You’re just an employee in my company. Why would I need you?”_

_“Oli-“_

_He left._

_He freaking walked away from her._

_She bit her lip, trying to control the scream that was about to escape her lips. He walked away and his words hurt. Tears clogged her vision and she raised her hands in the air and clenched her fists as the tears finally escaped._

_Oliver Queen was an asshole._

_“Douchebag,” Felicity murmured to herself as she wiped the tears._

_Maybe this was it. A small fight ending their friendship. She knew she was at fault too but what is it that she could have done?_

_Oliver should have understood. Period._

_She turned around and was ready to leave when a limo stopped in front of her. The window rolled down and she could figure out that the man behind the wheel was Oliver’s driver._

_“Ms. Smoak, Oliver told me to drop you at your house,” He said and Felicity rolled her eyes, “Well, then tell that douchebag that I would take a cab. I don’t want any favours from him.” Anger was radiating off from her._

_The guy smirked, “That is exactly what he told me you would say Ms.Smoak. He told me it was late and if you disagree then to pick you up and throw you inside the car. His words not mine.”_

_Felicity growled under her breath._

_She growled._

_Damn you Oliver._

_First he pisses her off and then he helps her? What was she supposed to do with this guy?_

_Well, it wasn’t her headache anymore._

_He made it clear._

_But, she didn’t have any option apart from leaving in his car, did she?_

_Plus, she was so tired._

_She almost yanked the door open and got inside the vehicle. She could see the driver smirking behind the wheel and she couldn’t help herself as she spoke, “Would you tell him that I put up a great fight? And that I called him a douchebag?”_

_“I would Ms. Smoak.” He laughed as he turned the wheel._

_“Thank you, Mr--.”_

_“John. John Diggle.”_

_“Mr. Diggle.” Felicity said as she nodded. She looked outside the open window before turning her gaze back towards the front seat, “Would you mind stopping at a convenience store? I need to buy some ice cream.” She sounded like a little kid._

_“Not at all.” He told her, his face showing off a grin that said he understood and Felicity nodded._

_Ice cream._

_Yeah, she needed mint chocolate chip tonight._

_You’re just an employee in my company._

_…_

“I thought she was just an employee in your company.” Thea looked at Tommy who sat on the couch in the VIP lounge, a drink in his hand, “She was. Until she wasn’t cause dad fired her because she mixed her professional and personal life.”

“And one more innocent girl loses her job,” Thea ended the story and this made Oliver chuckle from his seat on the couch, his head lying against the head rest.

“She definitely wasn’t innocent.”

“Really?” Thea made a face at that before she turned her gaze towards Oliver, “How is everything going with the company?” Oliver straightened up at this before answering, “Good. She is getting a new cabin soon.”

“Ollie, I seriously think you should consider taking my part of shares too-“

“Don’t even think about it.”

“How can you sit besides her knowing all the things she has done in the past? Things have already started to go haywire. Look at your hand. It’s like she is a bad omen.” She ranted off.

John snorted.

Oliver gazed at the bandage he had on his hand as he recalled their conversation that day,

_These wounds would heal over time. But they are some wounds in life that no one can heal, no one. Not even you._

He let out a breathy sigh at that, “She isn’t that bad, you know.”

Now, this grabbed a lot of attention.

Tommy whipped his head in his direction and Thea was staring at him as if he had grown two heads. John smiled lightly and Roy probably just looked confused, “Did you seriously just say that?”

“This hand,” Oliver started as he waved it ever so slightly in the air, “She didn’t do it. In fact, she was probably the first one to notice it and then it patch it up. I am not saying I don’t hate her. I’m saying...she is tolerable” he ended and Thea blinked before getting up, “You’re really making no sense, Ollie,” with that Thea walked out of the room.

Oliver sighed and just closed his eyes as he leaned back against the couch. He should have known before starting to talk about her.

“You don’t really mean it, do you?” Tommy asked him and Oliver didn’t open his eyes as he answered him sincerely, “I do.”

 

…

Felicity sipped her coffee as she looked at Ray and Courtney, “So my stuff is coming?” and Ray nodded at this, “Yup. Tomorrow morning and then two more days and voila, new house.”

Felicity grinned at this before placing the coffee mug on the table and moved her hands forward. She held both their hands before squeezing them, “Thank you,” she started, “You know for everything.”

Ray grinned at that, “Really? You’re going to thank us now. Starling City taught you manners, huh?”

Courtney laughed at that, “Exactly. What are friends for?” She asked her a rhetorical question and before Felicity could counter back her phone rang.

She mouthed a sorry as she reached for her phone. A frown shadowed her face for a split second as she stared at the name flashing on the screen. She got up almost instantly which made the couple frown as she just shrugged them off saying, “Work.”

She walked outside the café muttering under her breath.

Since when did he call her?

…

“You came on time,” Tommy chimed in the minute she entered the small coffee house. She ignored his comment as she sat right opposite him, “Why did you call me here?”

Tommy looked at her, “I just wanted to talk about Oliver,” He said and it was Felicity’s turn to frown, “Is he okay? I mean when he left the office he was-“

“He is okay.” Tommy assured her as his mind ran a thousand miles an hour. A part of him was acknowledging how much she cared of him while the other one made him realise that he couldn’t be fooled once more.

Not again.

“Stay away from him.”

“Excuse me?” Felicity was caught off guard at that and Tommy took this as his cue to speak, “I don’t want to create a scene, Felicity. I didn’t want you as a part of his company. I don’t want you as a part of his life,” He paused, “You and him, it isn’t going to happen. He is vulnerable around you,“ he told while Felicity continued to be silent.

He continued.

“He is attracted to you like a moth to a flame. Both of you are. You can’t resist the other. I know him and I don’t want that to happen. God knows how bad it went the first time. So, I just wanted to talk to you and say, don’t mess his life up again. Just don’t.”

“I messed up his life?” Felicity uttered before she stood up, “Can’t anyone just see or acknowledge that maybe it could have been the other way round? I can’t believe you were my friend once Tommy,” She told him, “And you believe that him and I could get back together?” She laughed humourlessly, “Never.”

“I am just doing my job” she told him, “I don’t need to be taught how to do it. Certainly not from you.” She ended the conversation before rushing past the waiter that was coming towards their table.

Tommy hit his fist against the table as she rushed out.

….

Felicity walked towards the diner where she had left Courtney and Ray. Her pace seemed slow and it seemed like she had been walking since forever.

_He is vulnerable around you._

_You can’t resist the other._

_Like a moth to a flame._

She didn’t realise that she had reached her destination before she saw Courtney’s face pop up amongst the crowd in the diner.

Walking up to them, she sat on the table as Courtney asked her, “How did it go?”

Honestly, Felicity wanted to say the truth but all that came out was, “It went well.”

Ray nodded before his face coiled up to form a frown. “You’re lying,” he declared calling her out on her lying which came after years of experience as a best friend. Felicity looked up as he asked her, “Who was it?”

….

**Six and a Half Years Ago**

_“Who is it?” Felicity yelled as she started running towards the door, cursing under her breath when the person on the opposite end won’t stop ringing the bell._

_She opened the door and was greeted by Oliver’s best friend. She was a tad bit surprised. It had been two days since the fight between Oliver and her and Felicity had been sulking. Tommy had been a good friend of hers, but she thought since her contact with Oliver broke-then her friendship with Tommy ended too._

_“What are you doing here?” she asked Tommy as he entered her house. She certainly hadn’t been expecting him, “If you are here to talk about him, then forget it.”_

_“What the hell happened between the two of you?” Tommy asked her as he made himself comfortable on the couch and Felicity sat right beside him, “Your friend is an A grade asshole,”_

_Tommy’s eyebrows rose at that._

_“Okay, it might be my fault too but he was really mean and I know our friendship has ended so there is no point talking about it.” She chose to change the topic and Tommy rolled his eyes at that, “Both of you are the same. You want to talk about it but you don’t want to talk about it. Both of you are insane.”_

_“He talked about me?”_

_“Is that the only part of the sentence you got?” Tommy asked her before speaking again, “Listen, I know you have feelings for him. Don’t even try to deny that.”_

_Felicity’s mouth was left parted open like a fish at that. So, she couldn’t really defend herself now could she?_

_“And the reason why you left that day is because of Laurel.”_

_“Yeah, it was Laurel, “she finally admitted, “She practically had to ask me to leave, Tommy. I couldn’t jeopardize his relationship with her.”_

_“Yet you don’t like the idea of them together.” He told her and Felicity frowned at that, “Are you talking for yourself or for me, Tommy?” She asked him softly and he was caught off guard at that. He sighed before speaking, “Is it that obvious?”_

_Felicity let out a small laugh, “Yes it is.”_

_“Do you think Oliver knows-“_

_“There is a reason why I call him the dumber one, Tommy.” She told him, “I don’t think he knows.”_

_Tommy shrugged, “I always knew he was the dumber one.” Felicity suddenly laughed at this as she pushed his shoulder with her own. A small smile formed on Tommy’s face, “It’s been four years of seeing them together and I have tried to move on. But something just pulls me back,” He let out a sigh full of melancholy._

_Felicity leaned her head against his shoulder, “Well, maybe it is because you always thought of moving on because they were together. Not because you wanted to” she told him, her voice soft. “Or despite everything you are hopeful. Every time Oliver cheated on her you thought she would leave him but she didn’t. You are too hopeful for your own good Tommy,” she said as if talking about herself too._

_Tommy wanted to say something, “He hasn’t cheated—“ He knew the reason behind it, “in the past six months.”_

_“It scares you, doesn’t it? You want to move but you want to hold on too. When you try to move on but you feel afraid thinking what would happen when something wrong does happen and she wants to rush back into your arms but you won’t be there because its too late” she said, her voice trailing off as if voicing her own emotions, “But the truth is, no matter what happens-the waiting only kills you day by day. And you are better off with someone else who actually is there for you and loves you rather than her whom you might never be with.”_

_Tommy nodded, her words leaving a deep impact on him. “I guess you’re right.”_

_She was, wasn’t she?_

_It had been four years. They were eighteen when Oliver first asked Laurel out. It was great in the beginning but then Tommy found himself being attracted to his best friend’s girlfriend and he almost cursed the Gods for this stupid cliché but he couldn’t help it. She was amazing and a part of him wished that she would see him like that too._

_But then he felt guilty because that would mean betraying his best friend. But ever since Felicity that guilt has vanished._

_Unfortunately, Oliver couldn’t see it. It did hurt him._

_And he knew it hurt Felicity too._

_He felt her nodding against his shoulder, “When am I ever wrong?” she added and Tommy chuckled, “Never Ms. Smoak,” he told her before resuming to the initial topic, “What about you?”_

_Felicity lifted her head, her brows coming together, “What about me?”_

_“Felicity,” he said, his tone telling her to not to avoid it. She chose to listen to him once while gazing down at both her hands entangled together. “I don’t know. Laurel is an amazing girl. I mean she is gorgeous and nice and has a big heart and she is a complete package. How many times did I use ‘and’?” she looked up towards Tommy who shot her a look and Felicity got up and headed towards the kitchen._

_“Wine?” she looked at Tommy who nodded before he jerked his head forward ever so slightly, telling her to speak, “She is a great girl. How come anyone would not fall for that? She is Laurel, gorgeous Laurel,”_

_“You are amazing too, Felicity.”_

_Felicity ignored him, “Tommy, guys like Oliver, they don’t fall for girls like me. And I’m okay. It’s just that even after knowing that there is nothing stopping us from falling for them and it hurts.”_

_It was the truth. As much as Felicity has read clichés and stuff like -a jock falling for a nerd, two different people ending up together, it is all fake_

_Maybe that is why it’s just in Mills and Boons romance novels because things like that can only happen in glossy romance novels and not in reality._

_“You know what?” Tommy suddenly got up from her couch and marched towards her before picking up the wine glass that she had just finished pouring wine into, “You are an amazing woman. You are intelligent and beautiful. So, don’t go all that guys won’t fall for me excuse. You never know who is falling for that smile of yours.”_

_“Where did you read that line?” Felicity laughed and Tommy mock glared at her as he sipped the liquid and said, “We should go out and have fun. Find ourselves a girl and a guy and move on with our lives.”_

_“I mean, what is wrong with us? We are amazing, okay? We deserve something better than pining over someone,” Tommy ended and Felicity nodded._

_“So, that is our new life plan. Tomorrow we’re going to go out and find someone. Especially you. We need to move on okay, Merlyn? Think about your happiness for once,” she ended her side of conversation and Tommy agreed to this._

_“You do realize that you would have to patch up with him, don’t you?”_

_“Eventually,” Felicity chose the word wisely and Tommy couldn’t help but roll his eyes at that. “You know I just want the best for you Felicity” he added and Felicity closed her eyes sending him a silent confirmation_

_“You remind me of Ray” she told him and Tommy eyebrows furrowed, “Ray?”_

_“He is my best friend. We met back at MIT,” she paused, taking a breath before continuing, “Thank you for this. You are like a brother I never thought I wanted but now that you are in my life I’m glad to have someone like you.”_

_Tommy chuckled at this, “I don’t want a sister like you too. Seriously? How many guys would I have to beat on a frigging daily basis?” And Felicity shoved him hard but she could see the sincerity in his eyes._

_“Is there anything we can do?” Tommy asked and Felicity’s eyes flickered around, “I have games, books and movies” she listed off and before she could help herself, she spoke, “I also have the movie ‘My Best Friend’s Girl’ if that is what you want to see.”_

_Tommy pushed her and she gasped, not expecting it. “You are mean, you know that?’_

_Felicity only laughed harder._

_…._

“Who was it?” Courtney asked her again and Felicity snapped out of her thoughts before she answered, “Nothing. Just an old friend.”

_Old indeed._


	9. Then and Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "True love never fades away.   
>  No matter what."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Betaed by Saumya and Kamaza! They are gems. Thank you so much!

**Chapter Eight : Then and Now**

 

"And this is my room," Felicity turned her iPad around showcasing her room to her mother Donna while standing in front of her bed. Donna Smoak had a wide smile on her face as she gazed at her daughter who was video conferencing her from Starling City.

Felicity walked out of her bedroom before heading towards the guest bedroom where Courtney and Ray were staying, "This is the guest bedroom." She said, moving the device across the room.

Courtney suddenly popped up behind Felicity and Donna could swear, her heart stopped beating for a split second.

These kids would be the end of her one day.

"Hey Donna," She grinned at the screen and the elder Smoak smiled back, "Hi Courtney." She greeted her too, "Where's your husband?" Courtney pointed towards the bathroom, "He’s in the shower." She told her and Donna nodded, "Felicity, the rest of the house..?"

Felicity blinked, "Of course." She started walking, this time heading towards the stairs that would be lead her to the living room.

"Please tell me you have a bar too?"

"Mom!"

…

 

"Felicity, did you talk to the realtor?" Felicity looked at Ray as she dropped the spoon she was clutching on the table. "I did." She told him and Ray frowned, "And you paid."

"Ray, this house is for me." She declared as she picked up the spoon again before dipping it in the milk and cereal bowl. "But I thought the money thing ended when I let you pay half the bill at the hotel," Ray countered. Felicity groaned at that, "That was cause I did stay with you guys and I was supposed to pay half of it."

Ray rolled his eyes, "When will you stop being so-"

"Stubborn, independent?" Courtney offered him words before she pushed the sandwich plate in his direction and he looked at her before completing the sentence, “Stubborn. I mean, why do I even try?" He ended while Felicity laughed. Ray frowned, the next second as he stared at the breakfast that was laid on the table, "Sandwiches, cereal, fruits? What happened to bacon and eggs?"

Courtney clicked her fingers in front of his face which snapped his attention, "This is our first day in this house Ray. This is all we have. Do you seriously expect bacon and eggs?" she said before pointing towards the kitchen, "Just look at that kitchen."

The kitchen wasn't really ready at the moment. Although it did look pretty, thanks to the workers and the three occupants working their ass off for three days straight. It had two bedrooms. The first one belonging to Felicity which she had decorated in a short amount of time, it was bright and beautiful while the other one was the guest bedroom-that was plain and simple much to the chagrin of Courtney. The living room happened to have a dining table at one end, while on the other end there was couch-right in front of was a large LED television.

It was great.

But some necessities were still missing. Like the gas supply, groceries and wifi.

Felicity definitely needed wifi.

She’d wondered if it was weird that for her it came before food.

Ray rolled his eyes as he reached for the sandwich while grumbling under his breath, "I get it."

Felicity's phone started buzzing as she let go of her spoon for the second time that day, her right hand reaching for the phone while her left cleaned the residual milk on her mouth, "I need to leave." She said while skidding her finger across the screen to dismiss the alarm. She got up and the couple looked at her, their eyebrows raised.

They looked alike in the expression.

Freaky.

"Meeting in an hour," She answered their unspoken question before putting up hers as she made her way towards the couch where her bag was kept along with her coat. "When do you guys plan on leaving?" And Courtney chose to speak, "We still have to book the tickets." She told her and Felicity jiggled her head, trying to acknowledge her response, "That's good. I'm leaving. I'll call you later," She ranted before promptly closing the door.

"She has been working so much these days." Ray murmured and Courtney agreed.

"Yeah. But at least she is settling back," She added with a small smile before getting up.

Ray bit his lip for a split second before asking her something, "Are you sure we're doing the right thing?" He paused momentarily, "Shouldn't we stay here with her? I mean in two days-"

Courtney chose to cut him off, her voice soft, "I know, Ray. But just trust me on this one, okay? She needs to do this alone."

Ray sighed.

Alone.

Would she able to do it?

…

Felicity fiddled with her purse as she took out her car key.

Yes, finally.

Her car was here.

She grinned to herself as she walked towards her Mini Cooper. The car was small and cheap but it was the emotional attachment to it that made it special. The vehicle was what? Seven years old- she furrowed her eyebrows as she thought about it.

Honestly? She didn't remember. But she had never been able to let go of it. She had another car back at home which was a gift from her friends – An SUV to be precise when she finally overcame her fear. It was amazing but still she preferred her small car over it.

Nothing can beat memories, right? Even if many of them were with Oliver.

Most of the time, she tried not to think about them.

And most of the times she failed to do that.

 

…

"Mr. Queen," Oliver was greeted by an unfamiliar voice the minute he entered the conference room and his eyebrows furrowed as he tried to locate the source of it.

_Isabel Rochev._

God, she looked scarier in person.

"It seems like people were right about you" she told him coldly and Oliver was pretty sure that this was what her actual voice sounded like.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, his eyes flickering towards the blonde who was sitting on the chair, a smirk on her face. She waved the red pen she was holding in the air lightly, her eyebrows hiking up and she gave him a grin.

Oliver groaned internally, "Clearly, being a CEO didn't change you Mr. Queen." She ranted and Oliver snapped out of his thoughts, "I'm sorry?" It came off as a question as his head moved forward slightly, both of his eyebrows rise

"Forget it." Isabel sneered and Oliver saw Felicity flinch at that.

Not that he was noticing.

Oliver chose to ignore the brunette as he made his way towards the vacant chair beside Felicity. He made sure to nod his head towards the other people who were present in the room while doing so.

He sat on his chair, his blue eyes turning towards Felicity who was fiddling with her pen. She stared at him as she pressed her lips together, trying to control her laughter. "Something funny?" Oliver questioned her sardonically and Felicity immediately shook her head, "Nothing."

The duo noticed Isabel staring at Oliver rather harshly and if looks could kill Oliver is pretty sure he would have turned into ash at that moment. "Stop," Oliver mumbled and Felicity looked in his direction, "What?"

"That smile," Oliver spoke, his teeth gnashed together as he tried to show everybody he wasn't really speaking, "This was the first and the last time this has happened," he told her, "No one talks to Oliver Queen like that," he started, "and stop smiling." He looked at her and Felicity stared back before she focused her attention on the file opened in front of her.

"You really need to stop referring yourself in third person." She mumbled.

"It still freaks you out?" He laughed lightly, "I'll continue doing it."

"Asshole." Felicity mumbled under her breath.

Someone clicked their fingers and the two CEOs turned to look at Isabel who shot them an annoyed look.

Felicity was pretty sure that was her usual look.

"If the romance is over, can we focus?" This caused Felicity and Oliver to look at each other before Felicity pulled the file rather harshly and swung her chair, her back facing Oliver.

Romance.

Yeah, right.

 

…

"What? No!" Oliver's voice was full of astonishment and Felicity did wonder for a split second what was it that the person on the other end had said but she chose to ignore it.

She sipped her cappuccino before picking her phone up and messaging Courtney, reminding her of the people who were going to visit her house later during the day. It made her feel guilty that it was them who were doing all the work at her house and she made a mental note to visit Big Belly Burger on the way to fetch them some delicious burgers.

"Hey," She blinked before turning towards Oliver whose hand was in the air. He was clutching his iPhone and before Felicity could ask anything further, Oliver cleared her doubt, "It's for you."

Her eyebrows rose up and she pointed her index finger at herself, "Me?" She double checked. Oliver grunted before nodding and Felicity placed her phone on the table before taking his phone out of his hand.

"Hello?" she spoke hesitantly. Up until now, her track record with the Queen Family wasn't the best, so you couldn't really blame the woman for bracing for the worst, right?

 _"Felicity?"_ And Felicity let out a sigh of relief she didn't know she was holding. Apparently, Oliver had been chatting with Judith. "Grammy," She greeted her, a smile crossing her face, "How are you?"

 _"I'm great dear."_ She heard from the other end and it felt good to be talked to politely for once. She had wanted to talk to Grammy before but alas, when were circumstances ever in her favour?

"What about you?"

She could see Oliver roll his eyes before he stood up and walked out of the office, without even  looking at her once.

Talk about awkward.

" _I'm fine."_ She spoke softly, " _Listen, the reason why I wanted to talk you_." And Felicity pressed the mobile closer to her ear-if that was even possible, " _Day after tomorrow. We have a small party."_

Felicity's eyebrows furrowed, "Party?"

" _Yeah, we have it every year. It's more like a small function. Not many people come-and media is not allowed too. More like a charity ball so we can celebrate and donate money-You know, because day after tomorrow it's-"_

Felicity's heart thudded as the realisation dawned on her. She pulled the phone away instantly, pressing the side button as the screen lit up and she saw the date.

8th February.

"Two days to go,"-she mumbled incoherently, her lips moving. She can't believe she forgot such an important day.

"Felicity, are you there?” she blinked repeatedly before nodding her head as her response. She closed her eyes, realizing that Judith couldn't see her. She ran her left hand through her-or well tried to, since her hair was in a ponytail. She pressed the hand on her head and closed her eyes while murmuring _, "_ Yeah, yeah I am here _."_

_"Will you come too?"_

Felicity was caught in an emotional conundrum as she stuttered to answer, "I-I don't know." Thankfully for her, Judith understood, _"It's alright sweetheart. I'll put your name on the guest list either way. But I'll really appreciate it if you come, okay?"_ Felicity sighed and nodded, "Yeah, yeah." She murmured, "Thank you."

" _You alright?"_ Judith asked her.

Felicity stage whispered, "I'm okay." She told her, not really in the mood of talking at the moment. Ten seconds later, she hung up having exchanged her goodbyes with Grammy who also had asked her to call her later. Felicity placed the phone on the table-the screen illuminating to show her the wallpaper.

_Oliver, Tommy and Laurel._

She let out a hoarse chuckle as she saw the happy picture before she pushed the phone away. She held on to the table lightly while she recalled the conversation that took place minutes ago.

She forgot. How could she frigging forget?! She could feel tears welling up in her eyes at her stupidity. She stood up in an instant and started walking out of the cabin.

Evelyn turned her attention towards the blonde who had just gotten out of the office, her eyes analysing her and she could tell something was wrong. Call it girly instinct. Or maybe it was the fact that her eyes were red and her pace was fast.

"Are you okay, ma'am?" She asked her and Felicity answered almost instantly,

"Yeah," She spoke, "I just need some air." With that she walked out.

…

 

Oliver found his way back to the cabin fifteen minutes later. Honestly, he didn't want to hear his Grammy invite Felicity to the party. He knew she should be invited-after all it was a special day for both of them, but _should_ was the key word.

Doesn't mean they have too.

He didn't want her in his house and he believed if he did invite her-it would be his first step towards weakening. After all, he had been always vulnerable around her.

He didn't want to be weak.

He frowned the minute he saw the vacant cabin. His head pivoted towards the two assistants who were sitting on their chairs, "Where did Ms. Smoak go?"

"I don't know," Evelyn stated and Oliver's brows came together, "She said she needed some air." The lines on his forehead disappeared as he understood.

She needed some air.

….

Felicity sat on the bench on the roof of the building. She wrapped her arms around herself and mentally cursed herself for not bringing her coat.

She looked down, her mind running a thousand miles an hour.

Day after tomorrow was a great day. One of the best days in Felicity's life but yet she forgot about it. Was this how important it was?

The guilt was clawing her from inside. How can she forget something so special? A set of twin tears rolled down her cheeks and she didn't bother wiping them as she knew soon, more would follow.

She forgot about it. Something that was supposed to be kept so precious and she couldn’t even remember it. She briefly wondered if Grammy hadn't called-maybe she would have carried on with her life normally, without even realizing that she had missed a special day.

No, she couldn't forget about it.

That was just wrong.

So wrong.

She sniffed as her eyes flickered around. It had been more than four years since she had visited the rooftop of Queen Consolidated. It was her secret hideout. Only a few selective people knew about it. A place where she knew no one would disturb her.

A place where she came when she wanted to feel alone. A place she came to when she needed to think. Not many people visited the rooftop. Probably only the janitor. The roof mainly consisted of a couple of storerooms.

It was really high and that was probably the reason why she never neared the railing. Okay, maybe she did once or twice-it wasn't that great of an experience. The best part of the place was that it was really isolated which made Felicity love it even more.

Isolation, yeah.

All Felicity needed was to be alone.

…

Oliver held the pen tightly, his eyes skidding across the text that was written in the file. He snapped it shut the next second.

Isabel would probably kill him for that.

He didn’t care.

He lacked focus.

His attention was getting deviated and he hated the feeling.

He dropped his pen as a sigh escaped his lips. He leaned completely against his chair as he contemplated the situation.

He raised his finger in the air before dropping it down-he shouldn't? Should he? He sighed at the last minute, knowing he wouldn't stop thinking about it otherwise-"Gerry,"

The assistant turned his attention towards the CEO in an instant before getting off his chair and moving into his office "Yes sir?"

"I need you to do something for me."

…

 

Felicity sighed as she brought her hands near her face before pressing her palms on her eyes as she took a deep breath. Her glasses had been discarded long ago because she felt the constant need to wipe her eyes.

Her palms felt wet and she wiped them against her eyes, trying to get rid of the wetness. Small thuds echoed across the small space and Felicity pivoted her head towards the source of it.

It was blurry.

She could tell it was a man though.

She pressed her eyes together as the residual tears escaped and her vision cleared, still not at its best though-"Gerry?" She murmured before wiping her cheeks and reaching for her glasses. The assistant smiled sheepishly and she could see a couple of things clutched in his hands-what was that? Pen boxes, pen stands-tissue boxes and Felicity was pretty sure they were other things in there that she couldn't make out, "What the hell?" She muttered as she stood up and Gerry gulped.

"I was just-" Gerry tried to wave his arms unsuccessfully, "Trying to help the janitor." A shadow crossed Felicity's face as she bit her lip, swallowing the doubts she had in mind.

She nodded and before she could realize what was happening, Gerry had walked past her and placed all the stuff near the bench that happened to be the closest to the storage room. She blinked and then, turned away.

Okay, no one was supposed to find her here.

"You look like," Gerry came towards Felicity, holding a tissue box and Felicity frowned, "Like you could use this." Felicity let out a breathy laugh as she took it,

"Thank you" she said as she sat down, the box right beside her.

Okay, what else was she supposed to say?

"Since when do you help the janitor?" she frowned and Gerry muttered, "Since now." And Felicity's eyebrow furrowed, "What?"

"Since forever!" Gerry laughed before he had a lightbulb moment, his eyes widening momentarily.

He turned his eyes turned towards the exit, "Ah, I forgot to bring the key to the store room." He said as he moved his hands in his pocket and shot Felicity a nervous smile. "The key?" Felicity's eyebrows rose and Gerry nodded hastily, "I should leave." He pointed towards the door, his voice trailing off and Felicity gave him a slight nod at that.

Gerry breathed a sigh of relief as he started walking out. Felicity called out his name and he groaned internally, his eyes closing tightly, "Yes?" he turned around the next instant.

"Don't-" Felicity hesitated, "Don't tell anyone about this." Her voice trailed off before she added, "Especially Oliver."

Gerry gave her a thumbs up before he made an about turn, "He already knows." He murmured to himself as he started heading towards the lift.

…

When Gerry came downstairs, he made sure to nod towards Oliver who breathed a sigh of relief at the site of it.

Evelyn scrunched her nose as she looked at Gerry, "Why did you have to take all the supplies to the roof? What's the janitor for?" She questioned him and Gerry shook his head as he took his seat. "Perks of being the assistant." He laughed lightly.

Evelyn shook her head, a small laugh escaping her lips, "It just that, it makes no sense."

Gerry smiled knowingly, "It makes perfect sense actually."

….

 

**Six and a half years ago**

_"You know for someone who is afraid of heights," Oliver started and Felicity whipped her head in his direction, "It makes no sense," he paused, when he saw the look of confusion on Felicity’s face.  "You know, you coming to the terrace to clear your head which is the highest point of this building," he explained._

_Felicity's eyes widened for a second before she gained her momentum back and glared at him. She turned herself away from him as much as possible and Oliver smiled wryly, his hands tucked in his jean pocket._

_Felicity shifted lightly in her seat when she felt Oliver sit right beside her. He looked at her warily before speaking, "I guess I deserve the silent treatment."_

_Felicity pivoted her head in his direction as she narrowed her eyes, "You think?" And Oliver's right eyebrow rose, "This would sound a lot more threatening if your cheeks weren't wet." Felicity let out a sound-that sounded like a cross between a whine and a whimper before she rubbed her cheeks, trying to get rid of the traces, "What are you doing here, Oliver?"_

_"Well," Oliver began as he trailed off the word, "I figured out that I was being an asshole that day so I came here to apologize but as it turns out your friends told me you were upset and you needed some air," He paused, "So I looked for you and found you."_

_"You came to apologize?" she murmured and Oliver nodded his head, his lips curled inwards._

_Felicity scoffed at that she turned away and Oliver groaned. "Felicity-"_

_"You should go."_

_Oliver stayed adamant as he refused to leave, "I'm not going anywhere."_

_She had been with him whenever he needed and now it was his turn. He'll be damned if he left her alone._

_Felicity was simply tired. Frankly, she didn't even have the strength to fight. After a fifteen minute crying session clubbed with a hectic day-_

_She was exhausted._

_And he wasn't going to leave without answers, so she might as well talk to him, "What do you want Oliver?"_

_His voice was soft as he spoke, "I just want to know what is wrong with you"._

_Just like that Felicity could feel tears collecting in her eyes. "I-" she started and Oliver looked at her expectantly, "The supervisor told me to make a presentation for a project and when I saw the material-I made a few changes because I thought it would make it better." She stopped as she took a deep breath, "But I-I was wrong and he shouted at me in front of the entire staff." She burst into tears at the end of it and Oliver's mouth parted open, "You are crying because you got scolded?"_

_Felicity tried to muster a glare, "I've never been scolded in my entire life and he shouted at me in front of everyone!" She waved her arms in exaggeration while Oliver looked shocked, "Never been scolded in your entire life?" Felicity whacked him in the arm, "Is that the only part you got?!" She sobbed and Oliver rubbed his arm as he realized she had started to cry._

_“Don't cry," Oliver moved his hands in the air as he curled himself around her, hesitant to do anything. He was never good with crying women. The only crying girl he had ever comforted was Thea-and that was when he bribed her with ice cream. "Don't cry," and looked down at Felicity, sobs wracking her small body._

_He didn't know how to make her stop but he didn't like seeing her cry._

_"Don't," Oliver muttered as he titled her chin in his direction. Her eyes were shiny and they looked brighter-if that was even possible, Oliver mused to himself-"Don't," He enunciated the word as his thumb wiped away the tear tracks on her cheeks, "Cry." He ended it at a soft note and Felicity looked at him as she blinked her eyes repeatedly._

_A moment of silence passed between them as Oliver ran his thumb along her cheek, a small smile on his lips. Felicity sighed softly as she leaned her head against his hand._

_It was a second later that realization dawned on her as their last conversation ran through her head and she snapped out of it before promptly moving away from him. "You should go."_

_"Oh come on," Oliver whined, waving his hands in the air the minute she moved away, "Are you seriously still thinking about our fight?" He waited for an answer but when he didn't get one, he spoke sarcastically, "Fine. Cry alone. Besides, who cries over getting scolded?" And Felicity narrowed her eyes at him, "If you can't help me then get out!"_

_Oliver chuckled at that, "I think you ae forgetting, my father's company." He started, "I can stay here as long as I want." He ended stubbornly, his tone still playful._

_Felicity looked at him as tears filled her eyes again and she cursed herself for being so sensitive, "And I am just an employee in your company?"_

_Oliver sighed, his face softening in a nanosecond. "Felicity wait,” he said, stopping her from turning away. Felicity turned her face away from him. "I'm sorry, alright? That was a dick move and I shouldn't have said it." On getting no response, he clenched his fists and he stared right ahead, "How about this? You want to cry, cry all you want. Just don't behave-"He looked at her, her blonde hair shining as the sun hit them-"Can we just forget about it for five minutes?"_

_He saw her stiffen and he knew she was listening._

_"For five minutes. Can we forget about our fight?" He asked politely and Felicity didn't look at him. He took a deep breath, "You want to cry-" He had figured it out._

_If Felicity wasn't going to stop crying, he wasn't going to force her to do it either. Sometimes the best way is to let it all out and he could see that this had clearly affected her. So, he was going to comfort her while she cried._

_It's the least he could do._

_"Cry all you want." He hesitated for a split second, "You-you can," His tone was tentative and he didn't even know why. "You can use my shoulder," He pointed at himself, his finger hovering in the air before he dropped his hand. His rubbed his fingers together, a nervous habit he had since he was kid._

_Why was he so nervous? He had seen her do that with Tommy before, hadn't he? Besides, he was Oliver Queen._

_Since when was he nervous around a girl?_

_But then again, he had seen a lot of firsts since he had met Felicity._

_He stared ahead, his eyes capturing the view that was before his eyes-it was indeed very beautiful._

_He waited for an answer._

_And waited._

_He didn't get any response._

_He mouth parted open, ready to speak when he felt a hand on his arm. He bit back a smile as Felicity placed her head on his shoulder, her hand curling tightly around his bicep, "Five minutes." She whispered softly and Oliver could feel droplets of tears falling on his T-shirt._

_Oliver turned his head, his lips hovering close to her golden hair, "Are you going to tell me now?" Felicity whimpered, "About what?"_

_"What did he say to you?"_

_Felicity tightened her hold on his arm and Oliver neared closer, "He said the truth. It was my fault." she started, "It's just that I've never been treated this way before." She sniffed and Oliver realized she wasn't crying anymore, "Back at MIT, I was one of the best students they had," She buried her head in the crook of his neck._

_Oliver loved how it felt._

_"My mum worked really hard for all of this and it all goes down the drain. When he shouted-I was just frustrated. I was really tired. I was awake for almost the entire night and then he screamed at me in front of everyone. Everyone!” She exclaimed, “How bad is that for my professional career?" She stage whispered and Oliver placed his hand over hers._

_Felicity blinked rapidly at the contact._

_He squeezed her hand, "You are awesome at computers, Felicity. These things don't define you. We're humans, we make mistakes." He comforted her, "God knows the amount of mistakes that I have made in my life." He chuckled at that and he could even see a ghost of a smile on Felicity's face._

_"So, cheer up, okay?" He told her, "Small mistakes don't overshadow your career." He stated before adding, "Besides, you screwing up gives me hope."_

_Felicity pulled away instantly, although her hand still lingered on his bicep, "My screwing up gives you hope?"_

_Oliver grinned goofily, "If people from MIT can screw up, then I can sure as hell screw up." Felicity laughed at that before she noticed where her hand was. She pulled it away almost instantly and a spasm crossed Oliver's face._

_"Your T-shirt is wet." She pointed out as she stared at the wet blotches on his black tee. Oliver smirked in return, "Do you want me to take it off?" He asked suggestively and was rewarded by her laughter._

_Felicity giggled at that before she took a deep breath and removed her glasses, ready to wipe them when Oliver snatched it out of her hands. "Oliver!" She said, her tone full of astonishment. She saw Oliver wipe her glasses with his T-shirt and she rolled her eyes, a breathy laugh escaping her lips as she rubbed her hands across her cheeks._

_Her eyes flickered towards Oliver, wanting to fetch her spectacles when she gasped before dissolving into a fit of giggles as she saw she saw Oliver's eyes blinking behind her glasses._

_He was wearing them._

_He looked really cute._

_He scrunched his nose as he looked around, everything seemed blurry to him, "How can you see from them?" And Felicity smirked as she pulled it out using both her hands, "They are designed for my eyes, not yours."_

_A second later, she wore them before she blinked rapidly. She looked at Oliver who grinned at her, "Thank you." She told him before she got up and Oliver's expression looked hopeful as he asked her, "Does that mean I'm forgiven?"_

_Felicity didn't talk for few seconds as she started to walk away, "Felicity!" She turned around and grinned at him. Walking backwards, she showed him her entire palm, "Five minutes."_

_"What?" Oliver turned to look at his watch as he realized it had been more than five minutes, "Oh, come on!" Felicity shot him one last look before she walked out and Oliver moved his entire weight forward, his back arching as his hands joined together. He grinned to himself._

_At least he made her smile._

…

"I tried making her smile," Ray pointed out and Courtney rolled her eyes at that, "Really?" Courtney asked him, "And how did you manage to comfort a girl who just got her heart broken by a guy?"

"I-" Ray rubbed a hand against his neck, "I sort of danced and cracked jokes." This made Courtney giggle in surprise as Ray blushed. She pulled his right cheek before grinning, "You're so adorable," she gushed, "I knew there was a reason I fell for you."

Ray laughed a little at that, "She is like a sister, you know."

"I know," Courtney smiled knowingly.

"Who is like a sister?" Felicity decided to enter the conversation as she moved inside the house, her hand clutching onto the bags of food she got from Big Belly Burger.

"You," Ray answered her in an instant and Felicity grinned as she headed towards the kitchen, placing the bags on the countertop.

"Did you guys book the tickets?" She asked as she walked out of there and made a beeline towards the couch.

"Tomorrow," Courtney stated as she shifted slightly, allowing Felicity to sit beside her, "Five pm."

Silence surrounded them for the next minute as Felicity fiddled with her hands, trying to find the right words, "I forgot." She whispered, her eyes still focused on her entangled fingers.

Ray's eyebrows furrowed as he shared a look with Courtney, "Forgot what?"

"Day after-" Felicity looked up, her hands separating, "Tomorrow." She ended and Ray's eye widened, his eyebrows rising, "You forgot?" His tone was nonchalant and Felicity gasped, "Yes! How come you are not making a big deal out of this?"

"Because," Courtney started, "You would have remembered it by then and plus, every year you are sulking before it." Felicity narrowed her eyes, "I do not sulk!"

Courtney narrowed her eyes, "You do which sucks, because tenth February is an awesome day." Felicity rubbed her fingers as she spoke, "It is but-" she stopped, her eyes turning glossy. Damn her tear ducts.

"I know," Courtney whispered softly, "We understand." Ray neared his chair against the couch as Courtney continued, "Which I why this time we want you to understand something," Felicity lifted her head, "You're going to do it" Courtney said and hearing this both Ray and Felicity's eyes widened as the realization dawned on them,

"What?" they asked in unison with the same comical expression.

"I can't-" Felicity stuttered and Courtney's gaze softened, "Listen to me once, okay? It's been three years Felicity and you have moved on." She paused momentarily as if checking if Felicity was paying attention or not which she was.

 

"You have built a life for yourself. So, maybe it's time-to let go of the past completely. To finally get this closure." She looked at Ray who nodded, "When Ray said that the reason why he wants you here in Starling City is to get closure, I hesitated. But you know what? As I thought about it, I realized-he was right." She looked at her husband who passed a small smile her way. "You need closure." She patted her shoulder, “Accepting reality is the first step towards it. You need to accept what has happened.”

Felicity sniffed and before she could muster a reply, Courtney started speaking again, "It's up to you. We just want the best for you. Be the heroine of your own life, rather than being the victim." She told her a saying she once read during her school days and a ghost of a smile came on Felicity's face, "I'll think about it” her answer came off as a question and Courtney smiled warmly, "Yeah." She paused, "And whatever decision you make, we're okay with it. Alright?"

Felicity nodded and Courtney pushed herself off the couch, "So, what did you bring?" She looked at the bags and her eyes brightened, "Did you get food from Big Belly Burger?" she asked, her voice full of delight and Felicity shot a small smile her way and nodded.

Courtney made her way inside the kitchen. She entered the area before looking around for the utensils. She could make out that Ray was talking to Felicity through the side windows of her eyes, she smiled involuntarily.

Maybe his talk would affect her too.

Courtney initially was hesitant in letting her come to Starling, who wouldn't be? It was clear that the Queen Family hated her but then Ray talked about closure and she realized he was right. She wanted to voice her opinion about Oliver too. Despite the fact the couple had broken up three years, she still believed that there was still hope for them.

His family had been protective of him and which is why they were mean. But with Oliver it was different. He was blinded-that is what Courtney believed. She tried to talk about it but Ray continued to cut her off and when she did have the chance, she realized that Ray really did hate him. So she kept quiet.

Despite everything, she hoped she was right. It was clear that Felicity still cared for Oliver, heck she even loved him and she hoped he did too.

Maybe this was the push the two of them needed.

She just hoped for the best.

…

**Six Years Ago**

_"Here's to hoping for the best!" Tommy shouted as the four people clinked their glasses together, wide smiles on their face._

_It was the opening of Verdant. The party was in full swing, an awesome response on the first day itself and Oliver couldn't help but grin at that._

_Tommy leaned in closer as he whispered to Oliver, "Thanks you know," he told him and Oliver's brows furrowed. "For everything," he elaborated and Oliver realized what he was talking about. "Are you kidding me?" he laughed as he placed the glass on the nearby table before the two shared a hug, "You did most of the work."_

_Laurel smiled widely as he watched the two. Felicity meanwhile had walked away from the group to check up on the caterer._

_She felt a little out of place._

_"Actually," Tommy's voice trailed off the minute he separated from his best friend, "There is someone else who did all the work." Laurel's face faltered slightly as she realized the minute Tommy said that, Oliver's eyes flickered towards the blonde woman who had been the centre of his attention for weeks now._

_"And she is still working." Tommy said, his voice laced with appreciation for Felicity who was talking to the caterer. Oliver patted his shoulder lightly before he started making a beeline towards Felicity._

_"Oli-"Oliver didn't really hear Laurel as he walked towards Felicity. The brunette bit her lip, her face recoiling in pain. Seeing this, Tommy decided to jump in, "So, what do you think of the new club?"_

_Laurel gave him a small smile._

_…_

_Oliver walked towards Felicity, a wide smile on his face. He really wanted to thank her for everything-all of this, he still couldn't believe that Tommy and he owned a club._

_A freaking club._

_He was stopped short by a brunette appearing in front of him and he blinked, "McKenna?" The cop grinned widely, "Long time no see, Oliver."_

_He nodded his head as the two shared a hug. "I didn't know that Tommy invited you." He stated and McKenna pretended to be offended, "Yeah, he did. You forgot about me, Queen. I should arrest you for that." She laughed and Oliver shook his head, "Actually, it's been-"_

_"I get it." She understood and Oliver breathed a sigh of relief, "But I must say, you guys have done an amazing job." Oliver grinned at the compliment, "Thank you." He looked at her empty hands and frowned, "Why aren't you having anything?" McKenna looked at him, surprised. "Excuse me?" He waved a hand in the air and a waiter started to walk in their direction._

_"You certainly have changed." She laughed, though her tone was full of appreciation, "And now I know why your girlfriend and you get along. It seems like you two share the same thoughts," She picked up a glass from the tray and the waiter took this as his cue and left._

_Oliver frowned, "Laurel?" Lines appeared on his forehead and McKenna's eyes widened momentarily, "You're dating Laurel?" Her tone was laced with surprise and Oliver blinked, "What about the blonde right there?" She asked, she jerked her thumb backwards and Oliver tilted his head to look past her head._

_Felicity._

_He instantly shook his head, "She is not my girlfriend." He clarified, "Just-just a friend." He ended, although his mind was running a thousand miles an hour._

_She was just a friend, wasn't she?_

_A very special friend._

_"Could have fooled me," She giggled and Oliver blanched, "Yeah. I-I should go." He said, his voice sounding distant and McKenna nodded, "I was nice meeting you. Keep in touch,"_

_Oliver smiled, "Yeah. You too." This was the end of their conversation as McKenna got lost in the crowd. Oliver stood right there as he replayed McKenna's words._

_Girlfriend?_

_A push snapped him out of his thoughts. Someone bumped into him and his mind finally focused. "Tommy?" He said after a moment as he realized that the person was his best friend._

_Tommy flashed him a lopsided grin, "Hey Ollie." Oliver blinked repeatedly, "Are you drunk? Tommy, I left you for only fifteen minutes!" He exclaimed as he noticed his dilated pupils and staggering form._

_Tommy laughed loudly and Oliver eyebrows furrowed as he finally asked her, "Tommy, does everyone think that Felicity is my girlfriend?"_

_Tommy Merlyn was an honest drunk._

_Oliver could trust him._

_"Duh," Tommy laughed loudly, "You two are so adorable!" He exclaimed and Oliver looked surprised, certainly not expecting this, "Why?" He asked the next second and Tommy stiffened._

_"Why?" he muttered, "He asks why." He laughed loudly and he pushed his hand against Oliver's forehead, "You're really dumb."_

_Oliver didn't reply and Tommy continued, "You are so confident when it comes to girls. But you turn into a stutteri-stutte-stuttering idiot when it comes to her." He ranted off, "She believes in you, she doesn't judge you and she can tolerate you." He tilted his head as if thinking, "And she is the first one you turned to for comfort. Not even me." He pointed towards himself, "And I am your best friend." He declared as he narrowed his eyes at him._

_"You can't see her cry and you sent her chocolates daily when you guys were fighting. You were so jealous when she went on a date with that Brad guy." He waved his arms, "You say she is beautiful. You call a girl sexy, pretty-but beautiful?" He asked rhetorically._

_"Dude, you are so whipped and you don't even know it!" he giggled at the end and Oliver bit his lip. Tommy pushed his forehead with his hand, "Dumber!" He chuckled, "She is never wrong." He frowned a second later, "Know it all." He mumbled before his eyes focused on something behind Oliver, "Charlotte!"_

_He patted Oliver's shoulder before he smirked, "Don't wait for me tonight!" He winked at him before shouting again, "Charlotte!"_

_Oliver let Tommy go, lines appeared on his forehead as his mind recalled his best friend's words._

_Jealous... Was he really jealous when he found out that Felicity was going out with that Brad guy..? Was the feeling of ripping Brad’s face and shoving him out of anywhere near Felicity, the sharp pain in his heart when he saw Felicity touching him, was actually jealousy and not some normal reaction. “Huh, I was jealous,” he thought as the realisation of the words of his best friend hit him_

_You can't see her cry._

_She believes in you._

_She did make him feel something. Emotions that he had never felt before._

_And now, it was crisp and clear._

_He breathed a laugh as his forehead cleared. His lips curling up as he grinned widely, the realization dawning on him._

_He couldn't stop smiling._

_He snapped out of his reverie when he felt an arm on his shoulder. His head turned right as he realized, Felicity was leaning against him, her elbow resting on his shoulder._

_"Where's Tommy?"_

_Oliver sighed lightly as he answered her, "Drunk and lost." Felicity giggled at that, "Of course he would be. The girls here look so gorgeous. It seems like Merlyn and you are doomed."_

_Oliver looked at her. She was looking at him, her eyes blinking behind her glasses. She was wearing a black dress-which in Oliver's opinion was sexy as hell. He remembered his mouth dropping open at the site of her._

_But that wasn't the only thing that got to him._

_"You're right, I am doomed." He countered and Felicity turned her attention towards him._

_"The girls here look gorgeous as hell but I can't stop thinking about how cute you look in those glasses."_

_And in that very moment Felicity could swear her heart stopped beating._


	10. Settling Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Does it hurt?”  
> “Not as much as somethings.” – Oliver Queen, 2x02, Arrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! You all, hope you are liking the story so far! x Thank you for reading!

There are some things in life you realize later on.

Well, the typical meaning of later on being in the next few hours and it’s mostly because your ego refuses to accept it.

Just like Ray Palmer realised something, like literally a few hours ago.

Well, minus the ego part.

He did agree with his wife about going back to Central city and finally providing Felicity with the opportunity to get closure. He appreciated it and thought it was the right choice to make.

But then the night came in and so did weird thoughts. Thoughts that scared the crap out of him. It is often said that girls have the nature of over thinking, but guess what so did men.

 His mind kept up conjuring worst case scenarios. He honestly wouldn’t have minded leaving if the situation was stable but with tomorrow being an important day for her, he was hesitant. It was an important day for all of them. He still remembered it and as much as it hurt him, he knew he had to keep her need for closure above his fear.

And yet he was scared.

Scared of leaving her alone and as much of a great day it was, he knew that emotionally it would affect her and especially with the suggestion that Courtney had expressed the day before, it was going to be a big day for her.

And he wanted to be there for her.

…

“We’re not going.” Ray declared the minute he entered the room. Felicity had left seconds ago and Ray finally had the opportunity to tell Courtney that they weren’t leaving.

Telling, being the keyword here.

Not asking. Telling

Courtney blinked, her hands stopping mid-air, her fingers tightening on the cloth she was holding, “What?” She asked as she threw Ray’s shirt in the suitcase clumsily.

“We’re not leaving.” Ray repeated, his tone firm and Courtney’s eyebrows hiked up touching her forehead which would have been comical any other time but not now, “And may I ask what made you change your mind overnight?”

Ray’s eye flickered towards the ground momentarily before he looked up, “She needs us.”

Realization dawned on Courtney as her face softened, “I know, Ray but you’ve got to trust me on this-“

“Your trust can go to hell!” he told her, his voice rising an octave higher than his usual and Courtney flinched before regaining her momentum, “Don’t raise your voice at me.” She stated firmly while crossing her arms across her chest. Ray rolled his eyes, “Court, why don’t you understand-“

“Why don’t you understand?” she moved her arms in the air to create emphasis, “She needs to do this alone, Ray. This was our fight until here but now it is just hers! She needs to face it on her own.” Ray glared at her as he patted his right foot against the floor, “Don’t think that I don’t know what you’re doing.”

Courtney blanched, “I’m sorry?”

“You want them to get back together.” He stated and Courtney bit her lip before replying, “I just want her to confront the truth. If she faces one truth, she’ll be emotionally be ready to face the other one. We need to stop babying her Ray. She has to face this alone.” She tried to put her point forward and Ray rubbed a hand across his face, “Courtney, you don’t get it-“pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Then help me get it.” She told him and she walked towards him, “What’s wrong?”

“I saw the way she was before, Court. You all still don’t know the entire story-it’s complicated. I can’t risk it.” He shook his head frantically, “I can’t risk her falling into the same hellhole again.”

Realization dawned on the brunette, “You’re afraid she’ll try to commit suicide again, aren’t you?”

Ray took a deep breath, “Yes.” He answered her after a moment of silence, “I’m afraid she’ll coil into herself again.”

“She won’t,” Courtney countered, “She was vulnerable then, Ray. She regrets that decision and she is not the same person anymore. She’s a strong woman. This time she won’t falter, we’ll make sure of it.” She paused, “But we can’t always baby her, can we? It’s been three years, if not now then when?” She asked him and Ray sighed, “I-I don’t know.” He mumbled before pressing the heels of his palms on his eyes, “I don’t know.”

“She’ll make it through, Ray. She will. We are there for her either way. She is strong, always has been.” Ray nodded his head twice, “She has always been strong, Court. But what happened years ago had shaken her to the core-“ he blinked rapidly as a realization dawned on him. A second later, he turned around promptly leaving the room.

“Where are you going?”

“Making sure she doesn’t falter.” He repeated her words before he made a beeline towards the door.

It’s about time he pays someone a visit.

….

Courtney bit her lip as she walked out of the room, her hand lingering on the banister. She saw her husband’s retreating figure climbing down the stairs and she sighed as she realized what he was up to.

In a way he was doing the right thing, but on the other hand the consequences of his actions could be bad. If there was anything that she learned at the funeral was that Oliver Queen hated Ray Palmer.

Just like he hated him.

Her lips formed an ‘o’ shape as she let out a deep breath, her hand tightening on the railing. She let it go a second later, turning around.

She needed to meet someone too.

…

Courtney bit back a retort as she clambered out of the cab after shoving some money into the driver’s hand.

Felicity wasn’t lying when she said that Starling City’s cab services sucked. Ah, why did Ray have to send the driver back to Central City?

Yeah, because they were supposed to go back.

And now she wasn’t sure about that too.

Ahh!

The only good thing out of this situation was that she had finally reached her destination, an hour late though but she was happy.

She blinked, her hands pushing the glass door as she entered Big Belly Burger. Her eyes shifted to the huge lines towards the counter before she stalked towards it and questioned a waiter who was at the opposite end “Hi, I am looking for Ms. Carly Diggle.”

One milkshake and ten awkward minutes later Courtney finally decided to give up when a sweet voice broke her chain of thoughts and said “I was told you were looking for me.”

“Carly Diggle?” Courtney asked and a frown adorned on the face of the woman in question before she gave a slight nod.

Courtney stumbled for the right words, “You don’t know me.” She said, the pace of her words rather fast, “My name is Courtney Palmer. Felicity’s friend,” Carly smiled at that.

“I was looking for Mr. John Diggle.”

…

Oliver Queen stood near the glass wall in his cabin or well, soon to be his cabin. Felicity’s office was almost ready and soon, the two CEOs won’t be sharing a cabin anymore.

He sighed for the umpteenth time that day as he stared outside.

It is often said that an empty mind is a devil’s workshop.

Well, the thoughts that were appearing in his ideal mind weren’t devious but it certainly weren’t helping him either. He didn’t even know why he came at the office today. They had cancelled all the appointments for the next two days much to the chagrin of Isabel Rochev but Oliver could care less.

During these days Oliver chose to be left alone. Despite the heart-warming memories of this day, he couldn’t help but grieve silently.

It was his way to deal with the problem.

Seclusion.

Even if it brought memories. Most of them were happy ones and he found himself caught in an emotional battle whether to laugh about those moments because they were so beautiful or cry because they are now in the past.

It was weird.

The onslaught of all the emotions he started to feel during these days.

He snapped out of his thoughts as a voice reached his ears, “Sir? There is someone here to meet you.”

“I thought I cancelled all the appointments,” Oliver frowned as he turned towards Evelyn who shot him a sheepish smile, “Actually-“

“I don’t think I need an appointment, Queen.” Ray finally joined in the conversation and one gesture from Oliver was enough for Evelyn to a make a move. She closed the glass door on her way out.

Ray crossed his arms as he stared at Oliver, “I think it’s about time we have a chat.”

Oliver’s jaw locked as he glared at him.

…

**Six Years Ago**

_Oliver glared at his two friends who were grinning at him._

_Yeah, well. Rather than helping him, they chose to grin._

_What were they? Girls?_

_It is often said that it takes a second to realize that you are falling for someone._

_Falling is long part but the realization part just takes seconds._

_It’s like a switch going off._

_Where you start seeing a person in a different light._

_Sometimes, you realize it on your own. Sometimes, your friends need to make you realize it._

_That’s exactly what happened with Oliver._

_He had found himself thinking about Felicity beforehand. Of course, he had. But now that he realized his feelings for her, he can’t stop thinking about her that way._

_To be fair he had always thought of her that way. But he had realized it only now._

_Ah, since when was_ love _so complicated?_

_Tommy walked out of the room where Oliver sat, entering the kitchen. John was standing near the kitchen island, a can of beer in his hand, “He is a goner.” Tommy laughed and John nodded, “About time.” He answered him._

_“Do you think he realizes he is in love with her?”_

_“No,” John shot him a smirk, “We all know that his head is shoved up his ass. It’s going to take time. He realized that he likes her more than a friend, not love.”_

_“Do I need to get him drunk for that too?” Tommy asked him, his tone full of amusement and John took a sip from his beer, “Love is something he will realize on his own, Tommy. Even now, you made him_ see _it. He has been feeling this for a long time.” He paused, “You know him. He has always been obtuse. Eventually, he’ll come around.” His eyebrow rose, “And if not, we’re there.”_

_“And how long will that take?”_

_John patted his shoulder, “I don’t know, Tommy.” He started walking out of the kitchen, “How long did it take you to realize that you loved Laurel?”_

_Tommy curled his lips inward, his lips forming a thin line as he watched his friend’s retreating figure._

_John Diggle._

_Always the wisest._

…

Courtney had heard a lot about John Diggle.

He was probably the one person Felicity was in contact while she was in Central City.

Well, apart from Robert and Judith occasionally.

He had to be special.

She was going to talk to him about her.

She would be damn if she let anything happen to her friend.

…

“Just the person I wanted to see,” Oliver’s voice was laced with sarcasm. He walked towards the desk before standing right in front of it, “Here to pick up your girlfriend?” His eyebrows hiked up, trying to sound as innocent as impossible.

Ray gritted his teeth, “Really, Oliver? That’s the best you could come up with?” He rolled his eyes, “I don’t want to sugar coat anything. Stay the hell from Felicity.”

“Excuse me?”

 “Stay the fuck away from Felicity. I am leaving Starling but that doesn’t mean you can do whatever you want with her. So, I’m here to tell you in simple words, stay away from her.” Oliver blinked momentarily before he responded, “Leaving so soon? Why? Didn’t Starling treat you well? Or better yet, “ He paused to give a dramatic effect, “Didn’t Felicity treat you well?”

A look full of sheer protection crossed Ray’s face.

Oliver’s fist clenched. He made a beeline towards him, “I should have done this a long time ago.”

And with that Oliver’s fist met Ray’s face.  

 

 

                                                                                 ..........................

He felt angry. God knows for how long he had wanted to hit this guy. His name made his blood boil.

He punched him and Ray retaliated. Oliver moved his head sideways as he blocked a punch but then another one came his way and a second later, he felt the familiar metallic taste of blood in his mouth. He moved his leg up, hitting Ray in the stomach before punching in his stomach. Ray groaned before he moved his arm up, hitting Oliver in his jaw.

It was a pretty gruesome fight.

It could have been worse if it wouldn’t have been for the two assistants who had rushed to call Felicity. They tried calling John too who happened to be the head of the security department but he wasn’t available. Resorting to just Felicity they hoped she would calm both the the two of them down.

Felicity rushed in, her voice rising, “What the hell is going on in here?” She hastily made her way inside the office, “Should we call the security-“ Evelyn proposed

Felicity gave Evelyn a sharp look, “No security.”

“Ray!” She shouted a second later, stepping between the two as she clutched his bicep, “Let him go!” Ray glared at her but didn’t stop.

“God dammit you two! Stop!” She said as she used all her strength to moved Oliver’s hand that was holding Ray’s collar, “Oliver!”

It happened it a split second.

Oliver’s grip slackened before he moved his arm away. Felicity didn’t have the time to analyse the situation because a second later, she felt a gust of wind hit her-a growl echoing in the office as Oliver moved his hand to punch her.

She closed her eyes tightly, lines marring her forehead waiting for the impact but it never came.

She popped one eye open only to see Oliver’s fist hovering in the air. She could see trails of blood on the bandage. She was pretty sure that he had injured himself.

Oliver’s expression softened for a nanosecond, his shoulders sagging before he glared at her harshly. Felicity flinched lightly as Oliver unclenched his fist, his fingers moving in thin air as if wanting to hold something, “You…you should go” he muttered before giving Ray a sharp look, “Get the fuck out of here” Oliver growled.

Ray was furious, “How da-“Felicity squeezed his bicep rather harshly and he turned his gaze towards her. Felicity looked at him, her eyes wide. She shook her head slowly whilst bringing her hand towards his face, she turned it a little towards the left, trying to analyse the bruise on his right cheek. She bit her lip as she saw that.

He had a busted lip, a pretty gruesome cut on his right cheek and near his right eye. It seemed like Oliver had taken out all the frustration at him meanwhile, Ray had done the same. Oliver had ended up with a busted lip, blood dripped down from the corner of his mouth, his cheek was turning black and blue and Felicity was pretty sure that his fist was broken.

She let out a puff of air. She knew that the two of them were angry and anything that she would say now would fuel their anger.

So, she chose to remain quiet.

Ray narrowed his eyes at her and Felicity pulled his arm, trying to get him out of the office, “Let’s go.”

Oliver let out a sigh as he stared at their retreating figures, “You hear her, Palmer? Get out,” Oliver sneered, his eyes fixated on the paperweight in front of him. He was standing against the shorter side of the table, his hands pressed at its corners as he leaned his entire weight on it. “Or is there something else you need?” He turned his head towards the two.

“God knows you’ve always had a habit of taking all my _leftovers.”_

Felicity stopped dead in her tracks. She had honestly tried to get out of here without saying a word to him. He was already very angry and so was Ray, she wasn’t about to instigate him and then cause another fight.

But this was enough.

She felt Ray stiffen and she knew he was about to retaliate too. The two exchanged a look before Felicity whipped her head, turning it towards Oliver, “Say that again.”

Something in her had just snapped.

Leftover, how dare he?

Oliver blinked rapidly before he smirked and Felicity was pretty sure that she didn’t know the person who was standing in front of her. “Say that again.” Felicity gritted her teeth as she crossed her arms, “Just because I am quiet, doesn’t mean I can’t speak.” Ray bit back a smile as she shouted in her loud voice, “Don’t you dare take my silence for my weakness.”

“I am not your fucking leftover,” Felicity swore, biting each word and Oliver’s mouth parted open for a split second, shock evident on his face. He regretted his words in an instant but chose to ignore that feeling.

He wasn’t _supposed to_ regret them.

“Yes, it’s true that you left me but you know what Oliver that makes you a coward for not fighting for us,” She enunciated the word ‘coward’, “And that certainly doesn’t make me your leftover. I am not your leftover.” She glared at him, blue eyes wide behind her glasses, “Don’t forget that I tried to fight for us while you let go. That doesn’t make me a leftover, instead it makes me strong and it makes _you_ weak.”

Felicity watched while Oliver didn’t utter a word. He had loads to say but something had happened.

He was speechless.

Felicity shot him a look before turning around and walking out of the office.

Ray grinned merely before he followed her, a proud smile on his face.

A blank look situated itself on Oliver’s face. His hands lay limp by his side. He twitched his fingers, an old habit of his and hissed in pain when he moved his right hand fingers.

They hurt.

But not as much as some things.

…

“Stupid, stupid, stupid.” Felicity muttered to herself as she paced in her newly made office. It was in its final stages, she would finally be shifting day after tomorrow-tomorrow being preoccupied due to obvious reasons.

“What did you?” She muttered finally looking towards Ray, her pace fast before she made a one eighty degree turn, “What did you do?!” She asked her best friend who was holding an ice pack over his right eye, “I just wanted to warn him.” He shrugged.

“Warn him?!” Felicity narrowed her eyes, “What is this? Some sort of high school drama? Come on Ray! You know that I can take care of myself.”

“I know,” Ray’s voice trailed off and Felicity raised her eyebrows at that, “Okay, I had my doubts” he admitted sheepishly, “But seeing you stand up for yourself today I think I was wrong. You can take care of yourself.”

Felicity let out a huff before she sat on her chair, behind the desk, her lips curled up ever so slightly, “I really did, didn’t I?” She grinned before she clapped her hands, “I mean, I’ve been wanting to do this for soooo long!” She pressed her hands on the table, “He called me a leftover, Ray. His leftover. I mean, who the hell does he think he is?” She muttered, “You remember, when I told you about how my dad left and that-“

“That’s what people called you.” Ray nodded, “I know.”

“He knew it too.” Felicity murmured, “And he still said it.” Her voice had become soft and eyes gleamed with tears

“But you totally burned him, “Ray tried to cheer up while waving his free hand in the air and Felicity let out a small laugh, “I did. But what you did out there was stupid.”

“He started the fight.”

“He could have sued you!”

“My wife is a lawyer!” He countered back and Felicity sighed, “Who is going to kill you by the way, but-“

“No buts.” Ray stood up, “You did an awesome job. You should have seen his face.” He frowned, “And you need to fix this up.” He said gesturing to the cut on his cheek that had been cleaned but still needed a band aid. He walked inside the washroom and Felicity nodded her head slightly, Ray’s words ricocheting in her head.

“You should have seen his face,” She murmured lightly, his face flashing in front of her eyes. She shook her head, trying not to think about it.

Nope, never.

 Pushing the chair backwards, she stood up, her eyes looking outside the glass door where she found Oliver staring at her.

She stopped in her actions. She saw his hand curling up before he turned his face away from her and walked away.

She let out a hoarse chuckle at that before pressing the edge of her hand to the corner of her left eye, trying to stop the tear that had been close to escaping. No, she would not cry in front of him. Never in front of him because that Felicity is long gone.

…

**Six Years Ago**

_Oliver Queen wanted to escape the restaurant._

_Like really._

_Because it was pissing him off the way Felicity was ranting about Ray._

_Her best friend._

_Or maybe more than a friend._

_The thought just killed him on the inside. It was like that Brad guy all over again, he remembered following her to the restaurant that day because he wanted to check if the guy was good enough for her or not._

_He wasn’t._

_No one will ever be._

_Not even him._

_She was Felicity._

_Felicity was busy babbling, her hands moving in the air and he instantly noticed the red nail polish on her nails. He laughed a little at that. Felicity frowned, her nose scrunching, “What are you laughing about?”_

_Oliver instantly started shaking his head, “Nothing.” Felicity brought her arm on the table and leaned her head on the palm of her right hand, “You’re lying.” She stated simply and Oliver moved his head back before he tilted his head sideways, his eyebrows hiking up in gesture that said ‘Really?’, “Am I?”_

_Felicity nodded, “You weren’t listening to me!” She said as she shoved him lightly with her left hand and Oliver defended himself, “I was.” Felicity pouted her lips involuntarily, “What was I talking about?”_

_Oliver was taken back before he let out his signature sighy laugh, “Something about Ray and computers?” He moved his hands trying to emphasize and Felicity laughed, “Have you ever listened to me? Like ever? “_

_“I do listen to you!”_

_“Really..? Then tell me what am I allergic to?”_

_“Peanuts.”_

_“What did I major in?”_

_“In computer sciences and cyber security.”_

_Felicity grinned widely at that as she patted his head, “Good boy.” She ruffled his hair and Oliver laughed, “So, Ray, huh?”_

_“Yup,” She said popping the ‘p’, “He is my best friend. We met at MIT and I have told you all of this beforehand, “She stated, “Your focus is really lacking.” She told him while tapping the table with her hands. A second later, a waitress approached them holding a tray with two cups of black coffee and plat of chocolate brownie._

_She smiled as she placed them on the table and the two of them mumbled a thank you to her. Felicity held the spoon, she took out a piece of the brownie, a smile crossing her face when she saw chocolate liquid oozing out of it._

_“Wait,” Oliver told her before he took a big bite of her brownie and Felicity frowned, “No peanuts.” He said as he munched it down and Felicity looked at him, “We ordered a plain brownie, Oliver.”_

_“They could give us peanut butter brownies for all we know. You know that it is me who would have to take care of you if something happens, right?”_

_Felicity huffed but she did smile. She sipped her coffee before taking a bite of her brownie, savouring the taste. Oliver scooped out a piece too and Felicity scowled at him while Oliver simply grinned at her, licking the extra chocolate liquid from the spoon._

_Felicity was about to retort something but a familiar voice grabbed her attention, “Missed me, Fee?” She beamed as she greeted Ray._

_But failed to notice Oliver’s scowl._

_…_

_So, Ray Palmer wasn’t that bad of guy._

_He was a great guy actually._

_And Felicity and he got on really well._

_Which bugged him to no extent._

_Especially when they started reminiscing their time at MIT._

_Plus Palmer was nice. Ah, he could not even hate him even if he tried._

_The three of them sat in her Mini Cooper and Oliver wondered how Ray fit in the back in the first place. He knew he won’t be able to but then again, he didn’t know. He always sat beside her, because he always complained that he might not fit in the back and made Tommy sit there. She would scowl at him and tell him that it was because his body was large and muscly and then he would laugh but would still call the shotgun seat and force Tommy to sit in the back._

_He wished Tommy was here but he had ditched the two of them last minute. Oliver had a nagging feeling as to why he did that._

_“So?” Felicity started as she stared in the rear view mirror, trying to catch a glimpse of Ray’s eyes, “You coming tomorrow, right?” Oliver frowned, “What?” He turned towards Ray before looking towards Felicity who was rotating the steering wheel, “Tomorrow?”_

_“Yeah, he is staying with me,” She declared, “He was stupid enough to book himself a hotel but tomorrow, he’ll come and live with me.” She turned her head and her blue orbs met cobalt blue ones, “What?”_

_“What?” Felicity repeated him, though her voice was filled with confusion. “You’ll stay with her?” He pointed towards Ray who nodded, “She’ll eat up my head if I won’t. I would have before but then I thought she already had so much of work and if she-“_

_“Oh please.” Felicity shot him a glare and Ray rolled his eyes, “You know you’re staying with me. So, don’t even try to fight okay?”_

_“I won’t,” Ray raised his hands in surrender, “God knows you might as well crash the car and kill me.”_

_“I might.” She laughed._

_“What about your work?” Oliver asked him, he really wasn’t liking the banter between the two, “Didn’t you work in a company too?” The idea of Ray living with Felicity didn’t appeal to him, “Kord Enterprises.” Ray nodded, “But I’m off for a week and Felicity could help me with my project too.”_

_“Project?”_

_“He wants to make his own company,” Felicity commented, “Palmer technologies,” Ray grinned at that and nodded his head, “I’ve been working at it for a year. Felicity is helping me with it.”_

_Oliver nodded his head and he let out a sound that sounded close to ‘uhuh’ His jaw was tight, his lips in a firm line._

_They dropped Ray at his hotel and Felicity made him promise of actually checking out of there in the morning so that he could move in with her. Oliver had glared at him before saying good bye and then had turned towards Felicity, “You’re staying with him?”_

_Felicity’s eyebrows rose as she spoke slowly as if talking to a little kid, “Yeah.”_

_“I don’t like it.” He bit out._

_Felicity looked at him bewildered before focusing her gaze back on the road, “I mean isn’t your job going to be affected? If you spend time with him?” He really didn’t want the two under the same roof, “I mean, my dad wants to meet you so I guess something important must be there.”_

_“Your dad wants to meet me?’_

_“Yeah,” Oliver mumbled, “About that. He said he wanted to meet you like at my house, he wanted to talk to you. “Felicity frowned, “But I didn’t do anything wrong!  I mean I did scream at him once when I thought he was about to fire me but I think we made peace later on. Especially when he thanked me at the night Verdant opened. Oh god, what if Cindy from the department bitched to him about me?” The realization dawned all of her sudden, “She is a despicable woman. I mean, she is so jealous of me and I don’t even know why and I’m pretty sure she has fake hair, “She squinted her eyes, “And fake everything. She has this whiny voice and I bet your father believed-“_

_“Felicity,” Oliver pressed his left hand against her shoulder, “Take a deep breathe.” Felicity complied. “My dad loves you.” Felicity frowned at that, “You think?” Oliver nodded and Felicity tightened her hands on the steering wheel. “You have nothing to be afraid of.”_

_Felicity sighed at that, “I trust you.” She nodded, “When did he say he wants to meet me?”_

_“Eh,” Oliver eyebrows furrowed, “I don’t know. Next week maybe? I don’t really remember.” He scratched his head, “I’ll tell you later.”_

_Felicity let out a light laugh at that, “Okay.” She managed to get out before they reached Oliver’s home. Oliver looked at his house gate before turning towards Felicity, “How long are you and Ray going to stay together?”_

_Felicity laughed, “Why are you so hung up on this?” She questioned him before shaking her head as if afraid of the answer, “Never mind, don’t answer that. You heard Ray, one week.”_

_“I just-I don’t trust him yet.” Oliver mumbled to her trying to hide the fact that he was jealous._

_“He’s my best friend, Oliver.” Felicity declared as if Oliver had said the stupidest thing in the entire world, “Like my brother. I trust him.”_

_Oliver suddenly had seen the light, “Like a what?” He asked, trying hard not to grin._

_Felicity frowned, “Brother.” She narrowed her eyes, “What is wrong with you?” She moved her hands in the air._

_“Nothing.” Oliver grinned as he got out of the car._

_It was as if he had seen the sun._

_Mumbling a goodnight and flashing her the biggest smile he could muster he started walking towards her mansion._

_“Idiot,” Felicity mumbled, a shaking her head lightly before twisting the car key that was fixed inside the ignition switch. She was about to reverse the car when Oliver appeared outside her window. He grinned goofily at her and Felicity pressed the switch which rolled the window down, “What?”_

_“Ray is like a brother to you, right?” He clarified and Felicity groaned, “Again-“_

_“What am I like?”_

_And Felicity was taken back. Her ruby red lips parted open in surprise and Oliver leaned his head against the door, “What am I like?” His voice was a whisper and Felicity felt he was too close to her. Not that she minded. She could smell his spicy after shave and his faint breath that smelled like coffee. She gulped, her eyes widening, “You’re-“she stuttered suddenly failing to find words which was ironical considering her tendency to babble._

_“I’m-“ Oliver encouraged her, liking the way she was reacting to him. If only he could lean his head further, “You’re..Oliver.” She definitely couldn’t say he was her brother nor could she utter out that she was falling for him._

_Frankly, she didn’t know what to say._

_So, she said Oliver._

_Because Oliver was Oliver._

_Wow, Felicity._

_You just voiced a null statement._

_Clever._

_“Oliver.” She said at the end and Oliver grinned at the response. She was pretty sure that it was his playboy smirk and she tilted her head, pulling away lightly. “My best friend.” She answered him and Oliver was about to say something but his phone rang._

_Moving away, he pulled out his phone and blinked as he muttered, “Laurel.” He picked it up and turned around, wanting to talk to her._

_Felicity’s face fell down at the mention of his girlfriend and she rolled the window up before reversing the car._

_Oliver hung up, turning around to face Felicity only to realise she had left._

_He cursed. So, he had managed to fight with Laurel, which is all they have been doing for the past few days and now, Felicity had left._

_John was right._

_He needed to do something about Laurel._

“You can’t keep messing with their feelings, Oliver. Choose and let the other go. It’s not fair to either of them.”

_It wasn’t fair to either of them._

…

Life wasn’t fair to anyone.

Felicity knew this fact.

But she did have the strength to face it. It had taken quite a long time to gain this strength and she was grateful to her friends.

Friends who were just about to leave her.

And she was going to miss them so much. They were her rock. And now, they had to leave. Sooner or later, this moment had to come and now that it had finally arrived, she felt sadness clawing inside of her.

Courtney grinned as she clicked her fingers in front of her face, “I take it that your expression means you will miss me,” And Felicity tilted her head slightly, “Of course I will.” She mumbled before hugging her tightly. The brunette laughed lightly.

Ray crossed his legs as he leaned against the chair, “What about me?”

“You too, jerk.” Felicity rolled her eyes and Ray grinned, “She will miss me more. Right, Felicity?” He asked her just to coax a reaction out of his wife who glared at him. Felicity shook her head, “I love Courtney more.”

“So do I,” He grinned cheekily as his wife whacked him on the arm while sitting down, “Ow!” He murmured, “Courtney, stop acting so childish.”

“Childish?” She murmured, “You had a fist fight with Oliver!”

“I thought you said that I needed to help my friend.”

“Yes,” She nodded, “By helping her. You stood up for her, I like it. You did the right thing when you went to talk to Oliver, “But punching him, Ray? Nope.” She stated, crossing her arms, “I would have stopped you if I would have known.” She huffed and Ray rolled his eyes, “It wasn’t that bad.”

“Wasn’t that bad?” Courtney blinked, “Look at your face. You know what will happen when we go back to Central City? My mum is going to kill me!” Courtney bit out.

Felicity laughed at that. It was a known fact that Courtney’s mother loved Ray more than her own daughter.

“Geez, Court, so much of concern for me?” Ray retorted sardonically and Felicity giggled, “You’re just jealous that your mum loves me more.” Ray let out a huff and Courtney narrowed her eyes at him, “I’m not-“

The flight announcement ricocheted across the Starling City airport and Felicity realized that it was time for the two to board their flight. Suddenly, everyone’s expressions changed as they realized that it was time to bid good bye.

Courtney got up from her seat, hugging Felicity with all her might, “Take care of yourself, okay? And if you need anything, we’re a call away.” Felicity beamed at that, “Stay strong.” She told her before she turned around to pick up her handbag.

Ray took in her position and Felicity felt herself being hugged tightly. “We’re here, okay? If you ever feel low, we’re there. Call anyone,” He grinned at her, “Show Oliver what you’re made of.” Felicity laughed at that. Ray pressed a kiss against her forehead before the couple turned around and walked away.

Felicity waved when they turned around to smile her way one last time. She sighed when she finally lost sight of them. A feeling set up in the pit of her stomach but just then a figure popped out in front of her, “Hey Felicity.”

She blinked, taken aback before she grinned.

..

Courtney sat in her chair and then turned towards her husband, “Stop worrying.”

“I’m not,” Ray laughed and Courtney blinked, “What?” He wasn’t tensed.

‘’Let’s just say I’ve had an eventful day.”

Courtney flashed him an impish smile, “Well, then let’s just say I’ve had an eventful day too.”

Ray looked at her curiously.

…

Oliver frowned as he entered his house. _Their_ house. It had been a while since he had been here. He usually came here to calm himself down.

He walked straight towards the wine cabinet and pulled out a bottle of whiskey. Pouring himself a drink in no time, he gulped the entire liquid in one go.

What did she think of herself? She had the guts to show up in his office with Palmer.

Palmer.

She really was trying to test his patience. He was the coward? Yeah, right. He wanted to scoff at that. He didn’t know why he didn’t reply her then.

It was her voice.

Felicity has always been a woman who didn’t hesitate to put her opinions forward and every now and then he would found himself on the receiving end of her loud voice, but today it was loud and if he wasn’t wrong close to cracking.

_“My dad, when he left..they called me things. They called us his leftovers and it hurt. He made a mistake and it’s us who are paying the price.”_

He gritted his teeth as he recalled that moment.

But wasn’t she a bitch too?

He tried not to think about the fact that she still had a hold on him. He needed another drink. He was about to go for another glass when the doorbell rang.

He groaned to himself and used his left hand to keep his glass down. He walked towards the door, opening the door with his left, his right hand bandaged by the doctor he had visited before coming here. His hand apparently needed physiotherapy. He had cracked his fingers.

“What?” His tone was snippy as he opened the door and Tommy Merlyn grinned from the other side. Thea Queen stood beside him, a small smile gracing her face too. Oliver frowned, “What are you guys doing here?”

He tried to ignore the way Thea gasped as she entered the room, pressing her finger on Oliver’s cheek, “What happened?”

Tommy narrowed his eyes as if perfectly aware what had happened, “We thought you might need a friend.”

…

Felicity smiled at John, “What are you doing here?” It took a moment for her to put two and two together and she beamed when she did, “They did this, didn’t they?” she asked him feeling grateful for having Ray and Courtney in her life.

“Yeah, Courtney talked to me.” He told her and she grinned, “Thank you for being there.” She told him, “But I don’t think you need to bother about me-“ She turned her head, trying to point towards the booth that Courtney and Ray had passed minutes ago, “It’s alright-“

“Felicity, do you really know me or not?” His eyebrow had risen as he shot her a knowing look.

“I know, I know.” She said, she didn’t mean to offend him, “It is just that I’ve been a headache for all of you and I think it’s time I take care of myself.”

“I’m not babying you Felicity,” John laughed, “And I certainly think you can take care of yourself. I just wanted to hang out with my friend, you know?” He tilted his head sideways and slowly Felicity’s lips curled up, “Okay. Hanging out it is.”

The two walked out of airport while John told her about how good it was to talk to her in person because his fingers ached while texting her and joked about how he was turning old. Felicity laughed at that before her eyes brightened lightly at the sight of a red Honda FCX, “That is your car, isn’t it?” She vividly remembered John sending a picture to her when he bought his car a year or so back. John nodded his head, reaching for his keys as he pressed the automatic button and Felicity saw the indicator lights of the car lighten up momentarily.

They got into the car and Felicity’s gaze kept changing directions as she tried to analyse the vehicle, “This is an amazing car.” She commented before she pulled the seat belt. “And the colour is awesome.” Her voice was laced with admiration.

John laughed, “Yeah,” The car revved as he started it, “I kind of love the colour a lot. It is the same one as Roy’s hoodie.”

Felicity frowned when she heard the unfamiliar name, “Roy?”

“Thea’s boyfriend.” Felicity’s lips formed an ‘o’ shape as she nodded, “How is she these days?”

John’s hand remained on the steering wheel, his eyes flickering towards the rear-view mirror every now and then, “She is coping up just fine.” He paused for effect, “How are you dealing with all of this?”

“Dealing with what?”

John shot Felicity a knowing look, “You know what I’m talking about. Tomorrow and Mr.Queen’s death and then-“

“I am okay,” Felicity cut him off, shaking her head up and down, “At least I will be.” She added as an afterthought, “I thought about it and I think I can cope up and face it. I am not really sad. Is that … Does that make me a bad person, John?” She asked him, looking for reassurance.

“Not at all.” John answered, “It’s a great day, Felicity. You shouldn’t remember it any other way.” Felicity nodded, her eyes blinking behind her black framed glasses, “But if something happens, you know I’m here, right? I know you haven’t told me everything and if you ever need to, I’m here.”

Felicity grinned softly, “You’re awesome, John.”

John just smirked as he drove.

…

**Six Years Ago**

_Felicity often wondered what was it with her and cars._

_They stopped in front of her._

_And they were always black._

_It was creepy._

_And dangerous._

_But then again, what was she thinking when she decided to walk alone in the streets of Glades to buy mint chip and some red wine._

_Ah, but they were just so tempting._

_Plus, she had a pepper spray in her pocket and also a retractable pen in her left hand, which she would use to stab someone momentarily if they approached her._

_It was Oliver’s idea._

_It was a great one._

_She sighed to herself as she walked down the street, flinging the brown polybag every now and then when a black car stopped in front of her. Now, Felicity did freak out, a squeal escaping her lips and she curled her toes, almost ready to run._

_Despite all the techniques._

_Running is always the best option._

_The window rolled down and she almost breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of a familiar face._

_John Diggle._

_She had talked to him and had thanked him before. He had lied to Oliver about how she cursed him into oblivion after their verbal spat. She really had loved the look on his face when he uttered that he knew how much she had fought and cursed._

_John had helped her._

_And they had met each other a few more times and Oliver always had talked about how awesome he was._

_He was a friend._

_Or maybe not._

_But Felicity needed a friend._

_And he was nice._

_And wise._

_So, she was happy._

_“Ms. Smoak?”_

_Felicity blinked rapidly, “Yes?”_

_“It’s twelve thirty. What are you doing here?”_

_Felicity didn’t say a word as she raised her hand, showing the polybag to John who raised his eyebrow, “I stress eat.” She defended herself, “I really needed mint chip and red wine. I mean, it’s Saturday and tomorrow’s Sunday which means waking up late and I have so much to worry about. Oliver is an asshole, “She huffed before her eyes widened, “But he is your boss and friend too. I didn’t mean to offend him. He’s my friend too.” She muttered at the end and John let out a laugh and Felicity shook her head, “I shouldn’t be talking to you about it, right? I am boring you, you should go.”_

_She started walking away and John honked the horn. Felicity turned around, “Get inside. I’m dropping you at your house.”_

_Felicity contemplated before tucking her pen inside the pocket of her Mickey Mouse pyjamas. She opened the door before getting inside the car. She chose to sit on the seat beside the driver’s, “You should sit in the back.”_

_“No,” Felicity answered, “Sitting behind makes me feel like I own the car which I don’t.” She said pointedly, “And you’re my friend. Sort of. I can sit here.” She told him._

_John glared at her, not harshly though, “You shouldn’t be out here. It’s dangerous.”_

_“I know,” Felicity mumbled, “But today I wanted ice cre-“_

_“No.”_

_“But I was prepared.”_

_John’s eyebrow rose, “Prepared.” Felicity nodded before taking out the pepper spray and the retractable pen out of her pocket, “Prepared.”_

_She thought John would falter._

_He didn’t._

_“No.” He said firmly, “Or I can tell Oliver about this too.” Felicity eyes widened before she nodded her head vigorously, “No.”_

_Silence ensued momentarily before John turned towards her, a small smile on his face, “So, Oliver is asshole, huh?”_

_Felicity nodded her vigorously, “Asshole.” She paused before repeating, “Biggest Asshole.”_

_John laughed when she repeated the word, “Why?”_

_“Well, he is acting weird.” Felicity crossed her arms after placing the polybag on the back seat of the car, “Like he flirts with me. Well I think it’s flirting. And he has a girlfriend back at home? Why flirt when he has a girlfriend. Uh, that is against the rule book.” She raised her hands in exaggeration, “He is weird now. Good weird though but good weird with a girlfriend and then I can’t enjoy his weirdness,” She scrunched her nose, “Asshole.”_

_John laughed as he changed the car gear, “Asshole.”_

_John complained about Oliver too._

_He dropped her at home._

_Felicity mused maybe she was stupid to think that John wasn’t her friend._

_The way he agreed to her calling Oliver an asshole John Diggle was definitely her friend._

_…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I'll like to remind everyone that this story is ahead on FF and the reason why it is taking time here is because of betaing. I hope you all liked it x
> 
> Seeya next time! :)


	11. Gone Too Soon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The worst day of loving someone, is when you lose them." - Thea Queen, Arrow.

10th February 2015.

It was a precious day for Felicity Smoak and Oliver Queen.

Usually, the day begins with a happy Felicity who despite everything tries to keep the past and tries to muster a smile in every way possible.

She tries to be happy as she remembers him, remembers all the precious moments that they had spent together.

 But then as the day passes the reality of the situation hits and she finds herself curled up in bed crying her eyes out.

There is an roller coaster of emotions that day. It hits you initially that how precious the day actually is and you just want to appreciate it but then it hits you that all of these things are over and all that is left behind are memories. 

She remembers the fact that he is gone.

…

Oliver Queen didn’t know what to think of today.

Whether it’s a sad day or a happy one?                      

The day usually begins with his family fussing over him, afraid that he might break anytime soon. Followed by a crying Thea and then, a grieving Tommy.

Oliver doesn’t want to remember him that way.

He wants to cherish him and honour his memories and so Oliver smiles. Despite, the emotional breakdown he is so close to having, Oliver smiles.

Because he deserves it.

His family knows that.

 They try to celebrate this day with great pomp and show because they think it will take off his mind and it does helps for a while. But then Oliver goes back to his room and it all comes crashing down

And then he cries.

 He cries at night behind closed doors and his family doesn’t know that.

…

Felicity squinted her eyes behind her thick spectacles as she tightened her hold on the piping bag causing white icing to ooze out of before moving her hand and making the letters on the cake.

She smiled to herself as she pulled her hand, her eyes moistening lightly at the sight of a birthday cake. She kept the bag down and shook her head, trying to smile.

She bit her lip as she tried her best to grin at the sight of the chocolate cake that she had just made.

Conner Queen.

That is what the birthday cake said.

Felicity Smoak always made a cake on her son’s birthday. She knew it wasn’t much but it was a habit that she would continue in the future too. She made his first birthday cake and she’ll happily make cake for all his birthdays.

It made her feel that he wasn’t actually gone.          

That his first birthday cake hadn’t turned out to be his only birthday cake.

Her phone buzzed as she snapped out of her reverie, a glassy layer covering her eyes. She really needed to stop crying. Trying to shrug away the thoughts, she picked up her phone reading a message from Iris that asked her to send her a picture of the cake which made her chuckle lightly. She snapped a picture, sending it to her quickly before walking out the kitchen.

Her feet padded against the linoleum floor as she entered her room. Her eyes flickered towards the Scooby doo stuff toy that was laid on her bed before she picked it up and hugged it tightly against her chest.

The next moment, she opened her closet and crouched down fumbling  with the stuff in there for a second before pulling it out a box. The box had the word “Conner” written over in bold letters and Felicity removed the tape with a little effort before opening it.

The box was full of toys and pictures. Felicity had a few pictures with him in her house and in her office too but they were some things that were still inside the box. She usually opened the box when she felt nostalgic and just wanted to be left alone.

She preferred the past over the present.

Because the past was filled with her baby’s memory.

She plucked out a couple of toys. His toy cars, she remembered him squealing happily when Oliver moved it in the air, his toy guitar that he tapped on repeatedly not knowing what to do before bursting into giggles at the sounds that the strings produced. His teether that he kept chewing on for more than two weeks, her heart breaking every time he let out a shattered cry when the dull pain hit him.

She fidgeted with the stuff inside the box before coming across a picture frame. A frown adorned her face as she turned it over and blinked when she saw it.

It was a picture of the three of them. Conner was squashed between Oliver and her as the two kissed his cheek from either side, his tiny hands pressed together.

She let out a breathy laugh as she stared at the picture wondering how it escaped her vision when she had shifted back to Starling.

She hugged the picture tightly to her chest, her silent tears blurring her vision.

She sobbed for her past.

She sobbed for her present.

She sobbed for her future.

She sobbed for her dead son.

And she sobbed for her and Oliver.

….

**May 2011**

**Post Marriage**

_Felicity hugged her baby tightly to her chest. She kissed his cheek and Conner made a face at that causing Felicity to chuckle before he moved his tiny hands in the air wanting to grab something. “Who is the most handsome looking boy here?” Conner looked at his mother as she spoke to him, his head turning lightly at the mere sound of it. Felicity nudged his nose with hers and Conner flashed her a small toothless smile before bringing his hands to his nose which was scrunched up and Felicity smiled at that. He looked really handsome in his black tuxedo and she was glad he wasn’t fidgeting with his bow._

_She placed her son on her lap before swaying left and right and Conner burst into giggles, his blue eyes twinkling with delight as his mother held on to him, “You’re enjoying this, huh? You enjoy swings.” Felicity’s tone was soft and three month old blinked rapidly as he stared at her._

_“Sorry, sorry!” Felicity heard a distinct voice before rolling her eyes. She picked Conner up, the latter’s hand reaching for her blonde hair which cascaded down her shoulders, “Daddy’s here.” She told him, “He is late. Again.” She retorted and Conner stared at her as if understood everything before pulling her hair._

_“No,” Felicity shook her head before she removed his hand and Conner’s eyes began to shine while his lip wobbled and Felicity kicked herself mentally, “Conner.” She sighed as she picked the kid up and lifted him in the air and she could see a ghost of a smile on his face. She brought him down again before lifting him up again, “My baby likes this, doesn’t he?” She laughed at the sound of his laughter._

_“And you tell me to not to do that with him.” Oliver made his presence known and Felicity pivoted her head in his direction, “Well, unlike you I actually hold him in the air. I don’t throw him.” She stated and Oliver rolled his eyes as he made his way towards his wife and son._

_Felicity eyed him unabashed as she stared at her husband who was wearing a tuxedo and she definitely could make out the suspenders he was wearing underneath his jacket, “You look hot.” She told him and Oliver laughed as he sat on the chair beside Felicity, “And you look beautiful.” He told her before dropping a kiss on her forehead. She looked drop dead gorgeous in red._

_“And you’re late.”_

_Oliver looked at her as if she had grown two heads, “I’m always late.” Meanwhile, Conner squealed as he felt his father’s hands on his stomach, his hands moving in air and Oliver moved his fore finger which Conner grasped in his hand._

_“That is not a good explanation,” Felicity pointed out before she shifted Conner on her other thigh, the three month old now between Oliver and Felicity, “It’s picture day followed by the boring ceremony that you rich people have to do to acknowledge that you are rich,” Felicity scrunched her nose at that._

_Oliver blinked, “You do realise you are a part of this family, don’t you?”_

_Felicity sighed, “Unfortunately.”_

_“Unfortunately?” Oliver’s right eyebrow rose, “You weren’t saying that in bed this morning!”_

_“Oliver!” Felicity shrieked as she tried to cover Conner’s ears but wasn’t able to since she had to hold the baby too, “Not in front of the baby!”_

_Oliver laughed, “Really Felicity?” He paused, “It’s not like he would get anything.” He lowered his head and narrowed his eyes at him playfully, “Right champ?” Conner blinked rapidly before moving his head towards Felicity and she laughed, “He knows I’m right.”_

_“He just likes bright colours more.” Oliver pointed out and Felicity just merely shot him a smug smile, “You know he does.”_

_Felicity looked at him, “I didn’t say anything.” She told him before her gaze flickered around. Moira and Robert stood near the photographer who was going to take their snapshots. It happened every year. It was mainly for publicity purposes despite the fact it was a personal photo shoot. Later on, there was an annual party that happened where all rich people of Starling City got together. Felicity had always thought about the party but had never imagined being a part of it._

_It was super boring._

_Oliver had told her that._

_She didn’t believe him._

_The pictures were the best part though. It was one thing that Felicity had admired the most. They kept all the photographs in the family room – which to Felicity’s surprise was a room just for photographs._

_Rich people, right?_

_Despite that it was precious. Felicity still had a picture of Oliver and her from last year and this year it was Conner’s first family picture,  so of course she was excited._

_“I’ll go help them,” Felicity told Oliver and Oliver grabbed her hand, “My kiss?”_

_“Excuse me?” Felicity laughed and Oliver grinned mischievously, “My kiss or are you going to say not in front of the baby?” Felicity narrowed her eyes at him, “You really want a kiss?”_

_Oliver nodded, “I’ve been working really hard for the past few days, you know? And I am wearing my sexy suspenders,” He winked, “Don’t I deserve a kiss?” Felicity grinned before nodding, “You do.”_

_Oliver grinned as he leaned in and Felicity squealed before picking Conner up. The baby made a small sound at that and Felicity placed him between the two. Oliver’s lips landed on his cheek. Felicity leaned in to kissing his cheek and the baby squealed loudly pressing his hands together, his eyes closed tightly. A flash light caught their attention and Felicity chuckled as she realized that Moira had snapped a picture of them. Her head was tilted, a huge smile on her face and Felicity in that moment felt proud of the family she had._

_“Felicity!” Oliver groaned and Felicity shook her head before handing over Conner to him. “Oh come on!”_

_“Not in front of the baby,” Felicity winked before turning around and walking away._

_Oliver huffed as he hugged his son tightly. “Conner, you would give me a kiss, won’t you?” He looked at him and Conner turned his head towards his father. He responded to his voice, “Right?” He brought him closer to himself and Conner’s lips landed on his cheek, leaving a small patch of drool on his cheek but Oliver didn’t mind, “Yeah, champ loves me more, doesn’t he? Mommy is mean.” Conner blinked repeatedly before grinning brightly and kicking his feet in the air._

_Oliver laughed, “Definitely my son.”_

…

Yeah, it was her son’s birthday.

Felicity smiled wryly as she hugged the photo frame tightly against her chest while whispering, “Happy Birthday baby.”

…

As soon as Oliver entered the living room he saw a huge banner that said Happy Birthday Conner. It was beautiful but sadly a reminder that he wasn’t around anymore.

Neither was his dad.

He tried not to think about that. Not today. He would at least try. He was supposed to remember his son in a happy way. Cherish his memories and not cry over them.

He started walking up the stairs before heading towards the room that he did every time on February Tenth.

Conner’s nursery.

He entered the room which hadn’t changed one bit. He visited this room every month because somehow he was afraid that if he wouldn’t he would forget about him.

His blue eyes moved around, he gazed at the rocking chair placed in the corner where Felicity or him sat with Conner.

He loved the view and always smiled at the sight of it.

The colours of the walls were bright yellow- a neutral colour since the two of them had decided not to know about the baby’s gender. The two had worked together for a two days straight, painting the walls yellow and had gotten cartoons all over those walls after his birth.

Especially Scooby doo.

God, he loved that dog.

He grinned before staring at his son’s crib which had taken hours to build. Tommy, John and he were so tired and he was pretty sure he had broken his back while making it.

But it was worth it.

Right opposite to his crib on the wall was his name written with stickers. His nursery was bright and colourful.

Just the way he liked it.

Just the way his mother liked it.

He made a beeline towards his crib where he picked up a toy that had once been his favourite. Well, except from the Scooby doo stuff toy. Felicity took that. Conner had a nursery in this house because he was brought up here but occasionally three of them visited their previous home too. Oliver and Felicity had bought a small apartment for themselves but after the pregnancy news came they shifted back to the mansion. They sometimes went back there, temporarily though. Hence, the apartment had a room for Conner too.

It was great.

They could enjoy their privacy and have time for family as well.

He picked up the rubber duck and pressed it tightly and it made a squeaky noise.

He laughed as a faint memory hit him.

…

**October 2011**

**Post Marriage**

_Oliver and Felicity were lying on the floor of the nursery, Felicity’s head laid against his stomach._

_They were exhausted._

_Meanwhile, Conner Queen still had energy piled up inside of him. He was playing with his toys. He picked one up before throwing it followed by crawling towards it to do the same._

_“Where does he get that much of energy from?” Oliver huffed and Felicity laughed. The two of them had been playing with Conner since morning. It was Sunday and that usually meant a day with Conner. The entire family spends the day with him. But at the moment it was just the two of them, the other family members were busy in some work or the other._

_“He’s a baby Oliver.” Felicity stated, “All he knows is how to play."_

_Oliver simply nodded as he ran his hand through her blonde hair. Felicity’s gaze was fixed on Conner who was now chewing on his rubber toy, “Conner.” Felicity’s tone was firm and the blonde kid turned his face towards her, “No.” She said firmly and Conner’s bottom lip wobbled before he started crying. The two parents were alert in a second before getting up. Oliver held his arms out for him before picking him up. Conner kept on crying, his toy now lying on the ground. Felicity picked it up immediately, “See?” She flashed it in front of his face and Oliver bounced him up and down, “You started crying? At such a small thing? Queens are strong, Champ.” He told him and his sobs turned into whimpers._

_“Mommy made you cry, right?” He asked him and Conner opened his mouth, making a sound that sounded like ‘Blah’ Felicity pressed the toy tightly, it produced a squeaky noise and Conner sniffed._

_“See?’’ Oliver talked to his son, “Everything is okay.” He looked at Felicity, “Don’t give him this toy.” Felicity nodded before picking up his Scooby doo stuff toy that lay on the ground, “Conner loves this, doesn’t he?” She asked him and Conner’s eyes brightened before he took it from Felicity. Conner hugged the stuff toy tightly as he laid his head on his father’s shoulder, Oliver moving every now and then and as Felicity stared at the two of them, a thought hit her._

_It’s the simple moments really._

_Simple moments that make you happy. She was a little kid when her father had left her. Maybe he was a great father too when he was there but the irony is that she doesn’t remember him. Unfortunately, Conner won’t remember this too._

_But he had a great father. And in the future too, he would be around and her child won’t go through the same things she went through._

_He’ll lead an amazing life._

_“You crying?” Oliver looked concerned and Felicity shook her head, “Nothing.”_

_“Happy tears?” Oliver mumbled and Felicity nodded, “Happy tears.” Oliver smiled brightly at that before pulling her towards him. He wrapped his left arm around her before dropping a kiss on his forehead while holding his son in his right arm._

_In that moment, Oliver Queen was content._

…

Oliver’s eyes blurred as he recalled the memory. Life can be weird sometimes. You never know what might happen the next moment.

He was content then.

Life had changed so much.

…

Thea Queen took a deep breath as she stood up. A small smile was etched on her face although it didn’t reach her eyes. Her peripheral vision caught the glimpse of another grave and she felt a pang against her chest.

She hadn’t even fathomed the scenario she was facing today.

In this very garden they had the best of memories. She had the best of memories and suddenly it was all gone.

Maybe he was an angel and God loved him too much and that is why he called Connor back.

But so did Thea.

And she missed him.

Every single day.

…

**December 2011**

**Post Marriage**

_“Con!” Thea tried and called out to her nephew. The littlest Queen was in her mother’s arms before Felicity noticed that Thea had her arms wide open for Conner. She set Conner down, “Conner. Look Aunty Thea.” The little boy blinked before looking at his aunt. A smile came on the face of the baby before he began walking towards him._

_He had recently started walking and God, it was the cutest thing ever and it looked like he never stopped. He wanted to walk everywhere. Felicity and Oliver had to lock the doors of their room- which was where he was staying these days because of his habit of running away -so that Conner didn’t escape. He could tumble down the stairs and injure himself._

_Thea squealed and Conner giggled loudly as he collided with Thea. The latter picked him and blew raspberries on his stomach causing him to dissolve into peals of laughter. “He is in a good mood.” She pointed out and Tommy finally joined in the conversation. He was sitting on the white chairs that the Queens had in their garden along with Laurel and Sara. “Of course he would be. It was me who woke him up this morning.”_

_“He was awake before that.” Laurel pointed out, “You just want to barge into everything.”_

_“No! Absolutely not-“_

_Felicity fixed her baseball cap while sitting on the grass. They were in the Queens garden. It was a Sunday and the weather seemed pleasant. It was a good thing that Starling City had a moderate climate throughout the year. Oliver was sitting beside her, his back against a tree. They had been playing baseball and God, were they tired._

_But Felicity loved it._

_Raisa walked past her straight towards Robert who was sitting on a hammock before placing the pancakes in front of him. His eyes brightened at the sight of it before Moira hit his hand. “What?” He asked._

_“No pancakes dad.” Felicity laughed and Robert glared at her, “What? Today is a Sunday. I’m off my diet.”_

_“Which is why you had a great breakfast.” Felicity pointed out referring to rather wholesome meal he had a few hours ago, “And you have just exercised. I don’t think you want it to go waste.”_

_“I was having fun.” Robert stated and Moira looked at Raisa, “We don’t need it Raisa. And don’t listen to what Robert says.” She said and Robert looked appalled, “I own the damn house. I order pancakes. I will get pancakes.”_

_“Your cholesterol level-“ Moira was cut off._

_“Raisa?” Oliver finally spoke, “Ignore them. Get the pancakes here.”_

_“No way-“_

_“Yes.” Moira smiled, “Just take them away from him.”_

_Robert huffed._

_Oliver straightened up the minute the plate was placed in front of him. Felicity looked at her husband before turning her eyes away. She was pissed off at him. He had come home late the night before and didn’t even have the decency to inform her. “Oh, come on.” Oliver snapped her out of her reverie as he shoved the plate in her direction, “Have a bite.”_

_Felicity ignored him._

_“I apologized, didn’t I? I’m sorry, okay. I won’t happen again” he mumbled, “Now you want to eat this or should I finish all of it” he said eyeing the delicious plate of food. Felicity huffed at his antics._

_She sighed before picking up the spoon that was kept on the table. “We’ll share.” Oliver smiled at her and Felicity narrowed her eyes, “I don’t like sharing with you. You eat too fast and I’m stuck being hungry.”_

_“Take the romance out of it, why don’t you?”_

_Felicity shoved him lightly, “I’m still pissed at you.”_

_“I know. I’m trying to convince you to forgive me,” Oliver retaliated and Felicity rolled her eyes, “And I hope it is working because I’m being super romantic.” He grinned like a cheshire cat.  Damn he was using that charming smile on her which she knew she couldn’t resist. He wasn’t playing fair and Oliver knew he had won when she laughed at him shaking her head and started eating._

_Thea Queen laid on the grass, her brown hair in perfect coordination with the green hue of the grass. She raised her nephew up in the air who was made an ‘Ah’ sound and Thea responded the same way acting as if she understood his baby gibberish. She looked around. Her dad was busy with his mom. Oliver was with Felicity and Tommy was talking to Laurel. Sara was busy on her phone and Thea was pretty sure she was texting someone, her boyfriend perhaps._

_She sighed to herself, “Everyone has someone.” She mumbled before looking up and meeting Conner’s eyes, “But I have Conner”._

_Conner made a soft sound and she was pretty sure he was about to fall asleep in a few moments. Being the youngest in the family, she had always been the centre of attention and had been loved by everyone._

_Now, it was her chance. Finally there was someone who was younger than her and it was her turn to play the aunt._

_To take care of someone. To love someone._

_She smiled to herself as she pressed a kiss to Conner’s head._

_And she would make sure she does that._

_…_

Tears dripped down Thea’s cheeks as she recalled the memory.

In this very garden they had the best of memories.

And now two graves laid there, her heart breaking as the reality of the situation dawned on her.

Life is weird.

And it’s unfair.

_Completely unfair._

…

Felicity straightened up when she heard the doorbell ring. Using the back of her hand to wipe the tear tracks on her face she walked down the stairs and opened the door. “John?” she uttered being surprised while the person in question grinned at her.

“I thought you might need someone today,” John added as he entered inside, “And I brought some company.”

Felicity couldn’t help but smile widely when she saw Sara. The toddler was holding on to her father’s hand, a shy smile on her lips. Her eyes wondered around, trying to analyse the new environment before they brightened as she stared at the cake Felicity had baked hours ago, “Cake” Sara mumbled, licking her lips involuntarily.

Felicity smiled as she shut the door.

Well, today was going to be a really eventful day.

…

Oliver smiled as he greeted the guests. He smile was genuine. This might be the only event that he enjoyed because the people that were invited were real and genuinely cared for the family and weren’t there just for business purposes.

A lot of them also questioned him about him being the new CEO and also the fact that Felicity was missing despite the fact that she happened to be Conner’s mother.

He ignored it.

A little while later, while he was in the party, a security guard approached him. Laurel frowned while watching him interact with Oliver and seeing a frown on his face. She perked up her eyebrows questioning Oliver who flashed a smile in reassurance before heading out the door.

This was something Oliver had to deal himself.

 

…

Felicity blinked repeatedly as she entered the Queen Mansion. It wasn’t much of a problem since her name was already on the guest list. Although, she did receive weird looks considering her attire which clearly wasn’t the party type. Just a plain simple red dress with a coat she had put on last minute. She didn’t give a damn about what all these people thought. She was here for Grammy and for her son.

She had finally decided to take up Grammy’s offer.

Well, in a way.

She wasn’t entering the party.

Nope, she was going to visit his grave. Courtney had encouraged her. Hell, everyone had and they were right. Sooner or later, she had to let go and it wasn’t fair to her son’s memory either.

She clutched on to the two sets of white lilies in her hand. Moving tangentially, she headed towards the Queen Gardens rather than making a beeline towards the entrance towards the mansion.

A security guard was standing right in front of the gate towards it and Felicity frowned when he stopped her, “You don’t know me.” She breathed and almost wanted to curse Oliver was employing new staff members, “I need to go in there.”

“I’m sorry miss” the security guard said firmly, “That is not allowed.”

Felicity glared at him angrily. She was already close to breaking down. He wasn’t helping her, “Go talk to Oliver Queen. Tell him Felicity Smoak is here.” Felicity walked past him not bothering to listen whatever the hell he was saying. Nothing could stop her from seeing her son today.

…

Judith had tried calling Felicity since the beginning of the event. She also had managed to ignore the dark looks that Moira and Thea had shot her way.

She didn’t care.

She hoped Felicity would come. She knew that the latter still wasn’t in terms with Conner’s death. She wasn’t able to save Robert or Conner.

The least she could do is save Oliver and Felicity.

She walked out only to see that one of the guards who were standing at the gate of the mansion making a beeline towards her. She frowned as he walked past her and towards the Queens Garden. She heard a little bit of yelling and to her surprise caught a glimpse of Felicity.

A smile formed on her lips and she was sure her son was rejoicing in heaven right now. She saw Felicity shoving past the guard and the two guard were about to follow her when Judith interrupted. “Let her go.”

The two of them looked at her weirdly.

“Go tell Oliver that Felicity is here.”

She smiled.

She knew only he was the one that could get through her.

Just like old time.

….

**March 2012**

**Post Marriage.**

_Felicity refused to come out of bed._

_Her baby was dead._

_Gone._

_It had been two weeks since his death and all Felicity could do is bawling her eyes out. She cried, screamed and kicked wishing it was her God had chosen to take away instead of her precious one year old._

_She had ignored Oliver too._

_She knew it was wrong._

_But she couldn’t help it. He didn’t get it, did he? He wasn’t there when it happened._

_But he was his father._

_So, he had every right to cry, to break down but Felicity didn’t give him a chance._

_She knew it was unfair and selfish but she just couldn’t help it._

_“Hey,” She heard a voice and her head snapped towards the door. Her bloodshot eyes met Oliver’s and she turned away, “Go away.”_

_“I’m not going away” Oliver told her sternly before he entered to room. She was pretty sure his eyes were puffy too but she didn’t have the courage to see him._

_She didn’t deserve anything. She didn’t deserve his love, the comfort he was offering. Nothing, she deserved nothing._

_“Felicity,” Oliver mumbled softly as he sat down on the bed. He turned her head towards him and Felicity gulped, “Look at me.” She didn’t moved her eyes from the comforter so Oliver moved her chin upwards, “There we go.” He said before showing him the tray he was holding, “I made pasta.”_

_Felicity bit her lip, “You?”_

_“Yup. Me.” Oliver smiled though it didn’t reach his eyes, “I figured out since it has almost been two weeks of don’t talk to me. I think it’s about time we get some food in our system, shouldn’t we?”_

_“Oliver-“_

_“Hey,” Oliver reprimanded, “Not now. You know because of you, I haven’t eaten today? You made me fast. Don’t you pity me? I’m hungry and so are you.” He said shoving a fork in her hands and Felicity hesitated, “Oliver-“_

_“I promise I would eat slow, okay?” He mumbled and Felicity knew he was trying to control his tears, “Let’s just eat.”_

_She picked up the fork and Oliver got comfortable on the bed before the two of them took a bite. Felicity closed her eyes as she started giggling, swallowing the food with a lot of difficulty. “You made this?” Oliver groaned as he tried to smile, “It’s really bad, isn’t it?” The pasta was bland and undercooked._

_Felicity nodded her head and she could feel tears drip down her cheek as she tried to smile, “Super bad.”_

_Oliver pushed to plate away, the forks dropping on the bed. Felicity started sobbing loudly as her husband pulled her closer. Oliver hugged her tightly, pressing his head against hers as two tears leaked down his cheeks too. “I’m sorry.”_

_“Shh.” Oliver shushed her, “You have nothing to be sorry for.” But she kept on mumbling._

_It was the first time that she had broken down in front of anyone._

_He was glad he was there for her._

_They were glad they were there for each other._

…

Felicity’s heart thudded in her chest as she began to walk towards the grave.

Why is it that she wanted to run away now?

This was the main reason why she didn’t want to come to Starling. She was afraid to see _him._

She was afraid of seeing Conner.

Her baby who she thinks she will let go of if she’ll visit his grave. Whom she thinks she will forget if she’ll let him go.

Who she almost _forgot_ about two days ago.

That was unfair to him.

Suddenly she felt like she couldn’t breathe. Her feet started moving backward as she found herself moving further and further away from the two sets of grave.

Her son and her father had left this world, left her too.

Even her husband had left her.

What was she fucking doing here?

She moved backwards, her back suddenly colliding with someone’s chest and she turned around only to find Oliver staring at her. The tears that had pooled in her eyes were about to fall and she didn’t want Oliver to see that. She lowered her gaze, her voice thick, “I’m leaving. You don’t have to kick me out.”

She began to walk away when his hand caught her wrist. She whipped her head towards him but his back was to her, “What?”

“You came to see him?” It wasn’t a question but a statement.

“Yes.” Felicity just wanted to leave, she didn’t want to deal with him, “And I don’t want to now.” She tried to move her wrist but Oliver pulled it tightly causing her to jerk towards him as he turned, “You called me a coward, Felicity. What are you now?”

Felicity blinked, “Wha-“

“You don’t even have the guts to see your son Felicity. It’s almost three years and yet, you couldn’t come and see him _once._ You called me a coward.” He told her, “What does that make you?!” His voice rose as he spoke the last sentence.

Felicity couldn’t believe this, “Fine. Oliver. You are right. You are not a coward. Now is your ego satisfied!” She shouted, “I was wrong before.”

“That is not what I meant.” Oliver spoke, “You came to visit him and you will visit him.”

Felicity blanched, “No way. I can’t.” She shook her head vigorously, “I can’t.”

“Felicity!” His hold tightened but not enough to hurt her. He was practically dragging her towards his grave, “Oliver!”

He let go of her hand the minute the two of them were standing in front of their child’s grave.

_In the memory of our precious angel,_

_Conner Queen._

_10 th February 2011 – 16th March 2012_

_An angel opened up the book of life_

_To record our angel’s birth_

_She closed to book after a little while_

_whispering, “Too beautiful for earth.”_

_Forever in our hearts_

And Felicity crumbled. She sobbed her heart out as she stared at the grave. Tears streaked down her cheeks as she finally turned towards Oliver, “Why are you doing this me?”

He smiled sadly, “Because he doesn’t deserve it, Felicity.” He whispered softly, “Because he doesn’t deserve it.”

Felicity pressed immediately fell to her knees. The lilies falling out of her hands and Oliver’s heart broke as he stared at her. He sat down right next to her whispering, “Say it.”

“No.” She said, her voice loud and Oliver growled, “Don’t test my patience, Felicity!”

“Oliv-“

“Dammit! You need to move on!”

Felicity whimpered as she stared at him. A pang hit her chest, “Conner is dead.”

Conner Queen was dead.

Her little angel was dead.

Gone.

Never coming back.

“Conner is dead.” Oliver sighed as he closed his eyes. A tear leaked out of his right eye before he opened them.

She had done it.

She needed this.

She hadn’t seen him once.

He had tried before.

He had failed.

But not this time. She needed to get this off her chest. She needed this closure.

Felicity’s hand dug into the mud, her nails filling up with dirt but she didn’t care. Oliver’s hand hovered over hers for a split second as if wanting to hold it but he moved away, shaking his head. He had no right but suddenly, it was Felicity who was falling against him, her back pressed towards his chest, “He is gone.” She mumbled and Oliver felt his heart break right in two.

He hesitated before he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer. He waited for two more seconds, expecting a push from her but when she didn’t, he hugged her with her both his arms. Tears leaked down his cheeks too and he closed his eyes. Felicity pressed her face against his chest. Hatred be damned. She needed him and as much as he much as he tried to deny he needed her too.

Grief hits everyone differently.

_An intense sorrow, especially caused by someone's death._

When you are grieving all you want is comfort. All you want is to forget about that tragedy.

All you want is love.

Even if it is coming from a person you claim to hate.

…

Courtney sat on the table as she skidded her pen across the case study she was ready. Iris sat on the opposite end, a glass of hot coffee in front of her. Courtney had asked for her help to cover up the cases she had missed while she was in Starling City since Iris was a prosecutor.

“Where is Ray?” Iris mumbled as she realized it was already nine and Ray was usually home by eight, “He won’t be back until eleven.” Courtney stated, “He is probably hanging out with Wells.” She grinned lightly.

“Why?”

“You know why, “Courtney sighed, “He misses Conner too, Iris. Hell, I miss the kid and I knew him for a week or so. He was an amazing kid. “She spoke softly.

“It’s hard,” Iris mused as she stared at Courtney who nodded, “It is.”

“Why did you leave her alone then?” Iris had wanted to ask this question since forever.

Courtney pushed the file away, knowing they weren’t going back to work any time sooner, “I don’t know Iris. I just wanted her to stand on her own feet and finally accept things.”

“You want Oliver and her to get back together, don’t you? You know he is the only person she could rely on.”

“Nope,” Courtney answered, “He is the only person who will understand and she will _choose_ to rely on if we aren’t there. He is the only one who can help her,” She mumbled, “Because it is not just about Conner, Iris. It’s about a lot of things.”

“They can’t even stand each other. They are a divorced couple, Court.”

“That’s the thing, “Courtney grinned.

“A divorce is between a wife and a husband. It’s never between two parents.”

_“Never.”_

..


	12. Needs and Encounters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “My only encounter with drugs was with a pot brownie my freshman year. By mistake! Which could have been fun, except I'm allergic to nuts.” – Felicity Smoak, 2x07, Arrow.

Felicity Smoak sipped her coffee as she leaned against her couch, her eyes fixated on the television screen where Dora the Explorer was playing. Her lips curled up as her eyes flickered towards the three-almost four year old who was holding on to a book, a colouring book placed on it, her right hand moving every now and then as she scribbled the crayons that Felicity had gotten her over a cartoon figure of Pikachu.

“Aunty Fee?” Sara’s brown eyes met her and Felicity smiled warmly, “Do you like it?” She showed her the cartoon which she had coloured yellow. Various strokes of the said colour were also coming out of the picture. Felicity looked at it before saying, “I love it.”

“Then, will I get cookies for lunch?”

“Sara,” Felicity started, “Your mom said-“

“Only one Aunty Fee.” She dropped the book on her couch, joining her hands together. Her brown eyes had widened and she could see them shine. Was this the thing John was talking about?

Because it worked.

“Only one.” Felicity told her and Sara grinned, showing her two missing front teeth, “But no telling mom, okay? It’s our secret.” She pressed her finger against her lips.

Sara followed. “Shh” she stage whispered, “Sara keep secret.”

Felicity laughed before ruffling her hair and Sara slapped her away before giggling and then getting back to her crayons, her eyes flickering towards the TV every now and then.

Felicity smiled. Her hold tightened on her cup as she thought about her own child. Sara and he were almost of the same age, him being a few months older. She had always thought about how they would grow up and be best friends and Lyla had suggested they might be even get married. Digg had been so angry while Oliver had just laughed and shrugged it off.

Now that she thought about it, talking about Connor was easier now.

She realized that maybe visiting him and confronting that fear isn’t exactly wrong. She was afraid that seeing him would make her forget him because she was actually resorting to moving on.

Initially, she pushed everyone away because she thought she didn’t deserve anything. She shouldn’t get to live her life if her child didn’t. And there was a fear too. She felt if she did move on she would forget him.

She was wrong.

She didn’t go back to QC. In normal situations, she would have engrossed herself in work but Oliver would be there. She just needed some time for herself. Maybe make a new software or something.

She had moved on.

And it wasn’t wrong.

It took her a long time to realize that and be ok with that fact but she finally did.

She visited Conner’s grave daily.  She had a lot to talk about and make up for. She realized she cried less yesterday than the day before that. She was making progress.

A small part of her wanted to thank Oliver. She was sure she would have left the Queen Gardens the other day without even seeing him once. But she hadn’t seen him since Conner’s birthday. Well, she had made sure of that. She went to the Mansion only when he wasn’t there. She was grateful for Grammy being there. She guessed she was the one who stopped the evil glares she used to receive from Thea and Moira.

She didn’t want to see Oliver as she didn’t want it to be awkward. The hug that they shared was brief. The moment leaving as soon as it came. It felt good but-

It didn’t wipe away the past.

It didn’t.

“Aunty Fee?” Sara called out for her and she turned her head towards the little girl. She placed the mug on the table, “Yes?”

It had been two days since John had been dropping Sara at her house. Usually, the couple dropped Sara off at the Queen Mansion or hire a babysitter for her. But she was at home and Sara and she got along well. She apparently loved her cakes and Felicity loved kids. It was weird how she didn’t like kids before but post Connor, she found them to be the most adorable people on this plant.

She liked spending time with her and didn’t mind babysitting. Lyla had to go to A.R.G.U.S while John had his own shifts. She liked spending time with Sara.

“This colour matches your eyes!” She declared before showing her the blue crayon and Felicity laughed, “It matches Uncle Ollie’s eyes too!” The child stated gleefully and Felicity playfully narrowed her eyes at the crayon, “It does, doesn’t it?” Her voice was full of astonishment, “I like this colour.” Sara mumbled.

Felicity laughed before getting up, “I like this colour too.”

She made a beeline towards the dining table where her phone kept. Picking it up, she slid her finger on the screen, realizing that it was one pm in the afternoon. Hearing Sara mumble his name triggered a thought. Her thumb hovered over the contact icon for a split second before she shook her head.

He will manage everything on his own.

He has been doing that for the past few years, hasn’t he?

…

“Has Miss. Smoak come today?” Oliver asked the minute he entered his office. Gerry shook his head and Oliver heaved a sigh before walking past them and heading towards the desk.

Three days.

She hadn’t come back to QC. Oliver did understand her turmoil but it didn’t help that the entire work load of QC was on his shoulders. It had been a few stressful days.

A chorus of heels echoed across the small space as Evelyn followed Oliver inside who sat on his chair. He leaned forward, his fingers moving on the keyboard, “What’s today’s status?”

Evelyn furrowed her eyebrows, “Sir, you have meeting with Isabel Rochev. Applied Sciences Division has a new idea and they want to discuss it. Also, a meeting with the shareholders of this company. The stock exchange ratings are in.”

Oliver frowned, “The share market ratings? I thought that was Felicity’s job-“ He stopped momentarily.

But she wasn’t around, was she?

He closed his eyes for a second and raised his hand in the next. Opening his eyes, he parted his mouth ready to say something when he was interrupted.

Seeing John entered the cabin, Oliver raised his fore finger pausing mid conversation with Evelyn. “Please tell me you got me a cup of coffee and something to eat.” Oliver groaned and Digg laughed, “Already stressed?” he asked Oliver while Evelyn bit back a groan.

That was her job, wasn’t it?

Luckily for her, Oliver waved his hand in the air making her leave. Evelyn promptly exited the office followed by walking out of the assistant booth  to get him coffee.

“Yeah,” Oliver sighed, “I have so much to do.” He said while John sat opposite him, “I have a meeting with Isabel Rochev. God that is woman is despicable and the last thing I want is spend two minutes with her. Then we have the shareholders to talk to and that was Felicity’s-“  He paused and John smiled knowingly.

“It was Felicity’s job.” He completed and he had rendered Oliver speechless for a second. A look of realization did cross his face before he shrugged it off, “I’ll manage.” He bit out, “Is there anything you need? Coffee, tea?” He tried to change the topic.

John laughed as he got up, “I don’t need anything Oliver.” He made a dramatic pause, “But you definitely need Felicity” he said before turning around to leave.

Oliver sighed before pushing his hands against the table for getting up. He knew staying here, he won’t be able to focus and even more so after Diggle’s great insight.

“I am going to Verdant today.” he told Jerry as he walked past Diggle.

Gerry blinked rapidly, “Sir, we are already behind schedule-“

Oliver shot him a look which shut him up for good before walking out. He ignored Evelyn’s presence who had just joined the three people, a mug of black coffee in her hand. Evelyn frowned as Oliver walked past her, “Co..ffee?” She murmured, confusion stark across her face.

John smiled before taking the mug from her hands, “I’ll take that.” He sipped the coffee, his legs moving as he made a dash towards the lift.

He chuckled to himself.

When will Oliver ever really learn?

…

Laurel smiled to herself as she entered her house. She had told her dad and her sister to not come home tonight. She wanted to do something special.

It was Valentine’s Day tomorrow.

Every year, she plans this day. Oliver usually doesn’t but she gets it. It was four days post Connor’s birthday so she gets it. But despite that, he celebrates it with her and the two of them have a good time.

This year too.

It would be amazing.

She would make sure of it.

…

**December 2008**

_Laurel was sure Oliver was going to break up with her._

_Well, to be very honest the relationship wasn’t really working out._

_But there was hope._

_She wanted it to work._

_She wanted to give it a try._

_But maybe fate wanted something else._

_“We need to break up Laurel.” The female in question closed her eyes, small tears leaking down her cheeks as the reality of the situation hit her_

_Doesn’t mean it has to hurt less._

_“I-“ She paused, she knew the reason too, didn’t she? “It’s because of Felicity, isn’t it?”_

_Oliver was taken aback before he nodded his head, “Yes.” And Laurel didn’t know whether to laugh or cry._

_“Did you kiss her, Oliver?! Did you sleep with her?” A sense of betrayal was still there. Five years and they go down the drain for a woman he knew for a year?_

_Oliver looked appalled, “I didn’t. I won’t do that to you.” He uttered, “I didn’t. She doesn’t even know I like her.” He was speaking the truth. She could see that._

_There it was._

_Oliver Queen was a playboy once who just knew how to screw people’s feelings._

_And now, he cared for them._

_He had changed._

_Something that she wanted to do._

_Something that Felicity Smoak had done._

_Without even realizing it._

_Is this what love is?_

_In hindsight, she should have seen this coming._

_It was pretty obvious, wasn’t it?_

_“You know,” She took a deep breath, “I always thought it was going to be the two of us. I always looked past your mistakes, hoping for you to be the better man. To be a successful man,” She raised her hands in the air, “And then, you cheated on me, so many times. But I forgave you Oliver every single time. You tried screwing my sister, I forgave you because I hoped we’ll be strong together. We faced it together and what happened to us, Oliver?”_

_Oliver pressed his fingers to his head before answering her, “That’s the thing Laurel. We expect so much from each other,” He walked towards her, “We are not in love with each other. We love the idea of being with each other. You love the guy you expect me to be and I was never the person that you wanted me to be, I have never been faithful to you. I took you for granted. You don’t deserve me.”_

_“You’re right, I don’t” she snipped surprising Oliver, “Get out of here Oliver.”_

_She didn’t deserve a man who was in love with someone else. She didn’t. She forgave him everytime thinking that he would eventually learn from it and will be hers ultimately because of her love and devotion._

_But clearly, that didn’t happen._

_Oliver wanted to say a lot but suddenly he couldn’t .He began to walk out and stopped midway to turn towards her. “I’m sorry, Laurel” he said, asking for her forgiveness for everything._

_And just like that he was out of her life._

_Laurel almost growled in frustration. She had tried so much to fix this relationship but in the end she lost him. She had always been jealous of Felicity. She knew the kind of spark Oliver and Felicity shared._

_And now, she had lost him to her._

_Life is funny sometimes._

_It takes it a split second for it to crumble._

_And now, Oliver was out there chasing the girl of his dreams._

_And she was stuck here alone._

_…_

Tommy was stuck at Verdant. It was five in the evening and he had sent Thea back home because he wanted her to relax. The girl had been sweating since the very beginning because of the huge crowd as it was a day before Valentine’s Day and the club was in full swing tonight. A couple of extra bouncers were appointed for tonight and all the workers were busy decorating the space, making it a bit romantic.

To top it all, there was a bachelorette party to be organized in the VIP lounge. So, he had to take care of that.

It was a long day.

Well, the only thing he could hope for is leaving tonight with a girl on his arm. Sometimes, he wished he would find a girl who could change him. He wanted to settle down. He wanted solace and home with someone whom he loved and who loved him back. It took him time but he got over Laurel. It was tough but he did. He realized it now that even though Oliver and Laurel were together, it didn’t hurt him much. Although, it did fill his heart with envy but it definitely wasn’t jealousy. When Oliver had started dating Felicity, Tommy had tried his chances with Laurel but when she rejected him, he moved on.

But look at him now, he still was alone wasn’t he?

…

Oliver entered Verdant late at nine pm. He would have come sooner. He left QC at twelve but he chose to go back to his old apartment because he needed some time alone, just to think.

_And you need Felicity._

In all honestly, he did. He was the CEO of a multinational company and so was she. Initially, he expected doing all of this on his own, but now that she was a part of it, he did rely on her.

He won’t lie.

He did need her.

She was his partner.

He knew the reason why she wasn’t coming. He too felt awkward after the hug. It did feel good though. Just to be there and cry. Cry for the life they had lost and for the lives that had been ruined.

Oliver never really cried in front of anyone. But that day he did. Felicity and he needed each other in a twisted way.

At that point, a traitorous part of him did feel good. It felt good to just hold her and be with her. To be with someone who understood your pain completely.

He shrugged these thoughts as he entered Verdant, his eyes looking for Tommy. A faint sound reached his ear and he furrowed his eyebrows, trying to concentrate and locate the source of it which was quite difficult considering the DJ in the club was in full swing. He was pretty sure it was the new VIP lounge in construction and he felt a bit guilty for not visiting Verdant sooner. He walked out, reaching the alley where he found Tommy.

 “Oliver!” Tommy yelled the minute he saw him while Oliver gazed at the men who were drilling the wall, the noise ricocheting across the entire space. Wooden logs were placed in a criss cross manner, workers standing up on them.

The work was in full swing.

Oliver at first didn’t really hear Tommy calling him but when he shoved his shoulder, he turned, “What?”

He could hear Tommy say something and he frowned before nodding his head pretending that he understood everything. He even managed to smile.

But he didn’t understand anything. He heard fragments of sentences, the word party and wine were the only words that he actually got.

And then Tommy shoved a bottle of red wine in his left hand. His right hand was still bandaged and undergoing physiotherapy.

A Cabernet Sauvignon to be specific.

Felicity used to love that drink.

His eyes widened as he gazed at the bottle before grinning at Tommy. He muttered something else and Oliver continued nodding his head before pointing towards the exit. Tommy understood what he meant and nodded his head.

Oliver wanted to say something else too but figured that he won’t be able to hear him anyway so he just shrugged it off. He walked inside the club once again, his eyes flickering towards the VIP lounges and he was sure that a hen party was going on in one. The other one seemed occupied by a couple of guys. The club was filled with red and white balloons and it went with the blue-purplish light of the club.

His hold on the bottled tightened as he decided to walk out of the club. Tommy had everything handled. Making sure to pay a visit to the kitchen staff, he told them to serve something to the workers too.

 And then he exited the club.

…

**December 2008**

_Felicity wanted to exit the house._

_Which was pretty bad considering the fact that she had just arrived._

_Robert Queen had invited her to dinner._

_And she was freaking out._

_Oliver stood right beside her, reassuring her. But easy for him to say, right? He was his son._

_“Felicity,” Oliver declared and Felicity rolled her eyes. She sighed, wiping off the imaginary dust off of her red dress. Oliver laughed lightly before offering her his hand and Felicity grinned lopsidedly before putting her hand in his, “Nothing will happen, okay? Trust me.”_

_Felicity closed her eyes for a second before opening them and nodding her head._

_The two entered the house, Felicity’s eyes flickering around the way it did every time she entered this mansion._

_It was freaking huge._

_And beautiful._

_Oh, so beautiful._

_She didn’t notice someone running towards her. A second later, the girl had flung herself at her, “Felicity!” The female in question looked downwards, a huge grin on her face, “Hey Thea.”_

_“You look beautiful,” The fifteen year old gushed as she stared at the blonde and Felicity smiled, “So do you” she said looking at her black dress. Thea pulled away before lowering Felicity down, whispering in her ear, “I need to talk to you.”_

_“Is this about Liam?” She murmured softly, referring to the boy she had a crush on and Oliver frowned. Thea blushed before nodding her head._

_“Hey there Blondie,” Felicity lifted her head to look towards Tommy who was holding a glass of wine in hand, “You’re here too?”_

_“Why? You don’t like it?” He cocked an eyebrow at her, “Are you saying you don’t like me?”_

_“And here I thought you weren’t that smart.” Felicity let go of Oliver’s hand as she started making her way towards Tommy._

_Oliver narrowed his eyes._

_Thea tapped her foot as she watched Felicity’s retreating figure. Looking at her brother, who was gritting his teeth, she smirked, “So Felicity is here.”_

_Oliver looked at his younger sister, “Thank you Captain Obvious.”_

_Thea grinned, “My pleasure Lieutenant Sarcasm.” She laughed while Oliver rolled her eyes, “So, are you going to tell her you lurrrvve her?”_

_“Shut up.”_

_“Felicity!”_

_Oliver wrapped his arm around Thea’s neck, pulling her towards him, his arm tightened kinda like pulling her in a headlock, “Don’t you talk too much?”_

_“I don’t-“ Thea squealed loudly as Oliver dragged her._

_…._

_Felicity was in the library._

_And just like every other part of the house, it was frigging huge. She had explored the entire house. In all honesty, she had wanted to do that since the very beginning but she felt awkward. How could she ask Oliver that she wanted to see his house?_

_She did once though._

_Damn verbal diarrhoea._

_Oliver had laughed it off._

_She sighed to herself, her hand moving to touch the spines of various books, their names etched on it before picking out the book she loved the most._

_Wuthering Heights._

_She had always been a fan of age old classics, her hand always stopped on books like Pride and Prejudice and Emma or fantasies like Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings._

_Oliver knew that. Just like he knew many other things about her, things that she hardly shared with anyone else before._

_She was about to open the book when a knock at the door caught her attention. She frowned for a second knowing it wasn’t Oliver. The guy never knocks._

_Never._

_Not even at her workplace since his excuse is that it isn’t the ladies room._

_Not good enough._

_Nevertheless, Oliver was Oliver._

_She turned and gasped, the black book dropping to the ground as she stared at Robert Queen. She laughed nervously and mentally kicked herself for dropping the book, “Sorry.” She mumbled before crouching down and picking it up._

_Robert laughed, “I never really thought myself of the scary type.”_

_“No,” Felicity spoke, “You’re not. I mean of course not. It’s just that-“ She waved her hands in the air, the book clenched in one, “Your personality is really intimidating.” She paused, “And it’s not like we talk much. I mean you did say thank you to me and we talked once before that. I like it but you still have the power to…” Her eyes widened, “Fire me.” She ended before taking a deep breath, “Three...Two...One.”_

_Robert looked at her, amused, “I can see why you’re different.”_

_Felicity frowned, “What?”_

_“Thank you.” Robert chose to say instead and Felicity blinked, “It’s been three months since Verdant opened. You did say me thank you.” She stated and Robert let out a breathy laugh._

_Okay, so she guessed this is how it became Oliver’s habit._

_“Thank you for making my son grow up. He has changed.”_

_Felicity bit her lip._

_What was she supposed to say?_

_She thought about it for a second before speaking, “It was all him, Mr. Queen. I didn’t do anything. He did everything. He wanted to do everything for you. For himself and he did. He just was confused. He didn’t want to work at Queen Consolidated but wanted to do something else. I just helped in nudging him towards the path he always wanted to go. Rest was all him. His hard work, his compassion. Tommy’s too,” She added her friend’s name, “They have been working really hard.”_

_Robert beamed, “Well, then I guess it’s a good thing that you’ll always be around.”_

_“Yeah,” Felicity spoke, “As a friend of course. For both Oliver and Tommy.” She uttered the last part hurriedly._

_Robert laughed this time, “Kids these days.” He murmured causing Felicity to frown._

_Did she amuse him?_

_She made a fool out of herself, didn’t she?_

_“No, you didn’t.” Robert answered and Felicity’s eyes widened, she uttered the last part out loud?_

_She groaned._

_Fortunately for her, Robert ignored it, “Come on, my wife wants to meet you too. She seems to love you.”_

_“Really?” Felicity frowned, “She doesn’t seem the loving type.”_

_Robert laughed._

_And Felicity face palmed herself._

_…_

Felicity bit back a groan as she walked her townhouse. She had just visited Connor’s and her dad’s graves and she was tired.

Her phone buzzed and she slid her finger on the screen, reading it.

It was a message from Gerry.

_Check your mailbox. QC related._

She frowned before walking towards the mailbox. It was a good thing that the message came right now or else she would have been too lazy to actually walk out of her house.

She opened the box only to find a black file inside. The words ‘Queen Consolidated Salary Structure’ were written on it.

Moving inside her house, she dropped the take away boxes on the kitchen slab. She walked upstairs, reaching her room where she walked straight to her bathroom and changed. Ten minutes later, she came out, wearing the most comfortable pair of pyjamas she owned. She picked up a pen from the pen stand that was lying on her study table before getting comfortable on the bed.

And then, she began to read.

And read.

And read.

Almost forty five minutes later, when she had finished reading the entire file did she sign. Biting the tip of her pen, she frowned seeing that Oliver hadn’t signed the papers.

She reached for her phone, dialling Gerry’s number. She bit her lip as she heard it ring and a second later, someone picked up.

_“Yes, ma’am?”_

“It’s Felicity, Gerry.” She didn’t know why she tried because Gerry never listened.

“I was reading the documents that you had sent. First of all, how did know where I live?” She didn’t tell anyone as such. Well, Digg knew.

_“I asked Mr.Diggle.”_

 “Oh okay then. Why didn’t Oliver sign the papers..?” she questioned

_“What?” Gerry’s voice was full of surprise, “Evelyn didn’t make him sign it? Shit!” He swore._

And Felicity blinked, “Calm down. It’s the salary papers. When I would come to QC tomorrow, I would give it to him. I wanted to talk about-“

_“Ma’am today is Friday. Tomorrow, the bank would be open only till twelve. The papers won’t reach the bank in time and the people would receive the salary by Tuesday. We are already running late due to Mr. Queen’s death. The salary needs to enter the bank accounts of the office staff by the first of every month.”_

“How come no one told me about this?” Felicity cursed herself too. She knew that salaries reach the employee by first. But she had so much on her mind lately that she totally forgot.

_“You both have a lot on your plate these past few days.” Gerry told her, “We just figured-“_

“Leave the figuring to us,” She said, making sure her voice didn’t come out as rude. Is this why dad handed over the company to them?

 “Why don’t you come and pick up the documents and take it to the Queen Mansion.”

_“Ma’am, I am a bit busy.” He told her._

Felicity frowned, “Busy-?”

_“Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. I want to spend it with my-“_

“Oh. _Oh.”_ Felicity mumbled, “That’s fine.” She pressed a hand against her head, “I’ll-I’ll do it.” She dropped the pen on the bed, “I’ll do it.”

_“You will?”_

“We can’t delay this any longer.” Felicity mumbled, “Thank you Gerry.”

_“It’s my job..Felicity.”_

Felicity hung up before leaning back, a groan escaping her lips.

So much for a movie night.

…

**31 st December 2008**

_Well, this night was eventful._

_Like really eventful._

_And Felicity was sure that she would remember it forever._

_Because here was Oliver Queen actually telling her that he liked her._

_Well, it was unexpected for him and her, both._

_It started with him talking about Laurel and telling her that their break up was something that was inevitable and this year he would woo the girl that he liked very much._

_Felicity was jealous._

_But then again, Oliver wasn’t really hers, was she? That is when the curiosity kicked in._

_Who was this girl?_

_But Oliver shrugged off the topic. She thought that maybe this girl Oliver was talking about was her but a part of her refused to believe that they could ever be together. They were unthinkable._

_That’s when she started to babble, to ease the situation, about she would go home and call Ray and would probably set her priorities straight this year. How this year she would date and try to settle into a good relationship._

_Suddenly Oliver’s anger flared up and shouted or more likely declared that he liked her. That she was the one he wanted to be with this year._

_All Felicity could do was blink._

_The clock buzzed and squeals ricocheted across Verdant telling Felicity that 2009 had begun. In normal situations, she would have been murmuring the countdown but now she was speechless._

_Oliver Queen rendered Felicity Smoak speechless._

_He admitted he liked her._

_Like, like her._

_More than a friend like her._

_She blinked and Oliver bit his lip, which made him look sexy but Felicity really needed her focus at this point, “What?”_

_“I like you.” Oliver started, “More than a friend.” He paused, “And since I’ve embarrassed myself already. I might as well talk further”_

_“I like the way you babble. The way you talk to yourself thinking that no one is around. The way you talk to your computers” he sighed with a small smile on his face and Felicity swore her heart started beating faster, “The way you always know how to make me feel better. To not expect anything but still believing in me.”_

_Felicity almost cracked a grin._

_“So, yeah. I like_ you. _And I know you won’t believe me and I know, it is my fault. I should have realized this sooner-“_

_“Hey.”_

_One word and Oliver stopped. It was soft and Felicity wanted to say tons of things. She wanted to tell him how long she had wanted to hear this and how much had she waited for this very moment-_

_“Oliver, I like you too.” She mumbled and Oliver flashed her the biggest grin she had even seen, “I’ve liked you for a long time. Still do.” Oliver blinked, how did she feel when he talked about Laurel in front of her face? He knew she had crush on him but she liked him-_

_It must be painful. And she must be doing it for Laurel and him._

_It hurt._

_“But-“_

_Oliver’s face crumbled._

_“You just broke up with Laurel, Oliver. It’s not that easy.“ She paused, “Before that you were with Sara. It’s just that I need-“_

_“You’re afraid I’ll cheat on you too.”_

_“No!” Felicity started, “I know you better than that Oliver. You won’t do that to any girl.” She mumbled, “You have never_ not _been in a relationship. Maybe you’re channelling your emotions somewhere else.” She stated, “I need stability.”_

_“I need time, okay? You need time. You can’t just jump from one relationship to another.”_

_There was a pregnant pause._

_“Maybe you’re just trying to get over, Laurel-“_

_“This is real, Felicity.” Oliver walked towards her, “It’s real.”_

_Felicity smiled softly, “We need stability. So, maybe we should take this slow, okay? Give me some time..to process things?”_

_Felicity liked him, she did._

_Hell, she thought she loved him._

_But did he feel the same way?_

_She just needed time to process things._

_As much as it made her heart swell up with hope._

_She needed time._

_“I understand.”_

_Oliver understood._

_Doesn’t mean it has to hurt less._

_He broke up with his five year old girlfriend a week ago and here he was in front of Felicity._

_She had to have doubts._

_This must be too much for her._

_She wanted stability._

_His heart swelled up with the possibility of a stable relationship._

_She thought they could last._

_If she needed time, then she’ll get it._

_She waited for him._

_He could wait for her._

_He would wait for her._

_And maybe, it wasn’t that bad._

_Because later that night, when he followed Felicity who was standing outside in the alleyway that led to Verdant, she was gazing at the stars. She didn’t even turn to face him, just staring up at them._

_She mumbled about how her father once told her that Sirius was the new-year star and how it shined the brightest on New Year’s._

_Oliver just smiled as he heard her speak. She rarely talked about her father. He moved his hand, hesitatingly before stopping it mid-air. But last minute, he shrugged the thought off before reaching for her hand._

_Felicity looked at him the minute she felt his fingers on her knuckles. And Oliver almost kicked himself mentally for even trying that._

_But then, Felicity opened her palm and interlocked her fingers with his. Her hand felt soft and warm and Oliver didn’t want to let go of it._

_She turned and looked towards the stars once again, not saying a word._

_But Oliver had the brightest smile on his face as he held her hand._

_There was hope._

_Maybe waiting wasn’t that bad._

_…_

Felicity didn’t like to wait.

But this is what she had to do. She wanted to go back to her home and just go and lie in front of her television and eat the Chinese food which she hadn’t even opened.

She was afraid that she would give into the temptation and would stay in her house rather than coming over here and seeing Oliver. It took her a good ten minutes to convince herself into leaving and changing into a t-shirt and jeans along with a pair of sneakers.

She got up and headed towards the window, her eyes fixing on the graves that laid there. The flowers she had left their earlier that night were still there.

Maybe she should go and visit them again.

Felicity was thankful that Moira was in her room and Thea wasn’t around.

And she also thankful about the fact that Oliver was here.

It was eleven pm and tomorrow was Valentine’s day, she expected him to be with Laurel.

The thought suddenly made her frown. A pang hit her chest at the thought of it and she frowned.

Since when did she care?

…

Oliver was looking for his belt when he heard a knock at his door. He walked towards the door and peeked his head out. Raisa looked at him, “Felicity is here.”

Oliver blinked, surprise etched on his face, “She is here?” He asked “Yes,” Raisa answered, “I’ll be down in two.” He answered, “Get her something to drink, meanwhile.”

“You don’t need to tell me that, Oliver.” Raisa said softly, “I’ll get her some wine.”

“Red?”

Raisa frowned, “I think we’re out of the red one.”

Oliver bit his lip, “But she likes red.”

Suddenly he remembered something.

He turned his head and caught the sight of the bottle Tommy had handed over to him. Letting go of the doorknob, he headed towards the table where the bottle was kept. He smiled before picking it, “Cabernet Sauvignon,” he mumbled right before he handed over the bottle to Raisa , “Give her this. She used to love it.”

Raisa flashed him a knowing smile before leaving with the bottle in her hand.

Oliver turned around and moved his head across the room, continuing with his search. Ten seconds later, he found it. He put it on before reaching for the brown leather jacket that was lying on his bed. He was about to put it on when his phone started ringing.

He grinned to himself when he saw on the name, “Hey Tommy,” He said as he placed the phone against his ear.

_“You reached Laurel’s?”_

“Not yet.” He mumbled, “What about you? Still at Verdant?”

“ _Yup.” Tommy answered from the other end, “It’s pretty stressful here.”_

Oliver felt guilty hearing this, “How about I’ll drop by at the club by twelve thirty. I’m sure Laurel will understand.” He offered and he could hear Tommy let out a sigh of relief from the other end, _“That works for me. It’s pretty hectic here especially with the bachelorette party. God knows what would have happened if hadn’t stopped them from drinking that spiked drink, I handed over to you. Did you throw it?”_

Oliver frowned, “Spiked?”

“ _Yup.” Tommy said, popping the ‘p’, “They were about to make the bride drink the red wine. Luckily, I saw one of the girls messing with the drink. When I asked her she said that the bride was her best friend and she just wanted her to loosen up for tonight. Yeah, right.” Tommy scoffed, “I’m telling you. She would have totally acted like a drunkard who had just downed a few bottles,”_

Oliver paled, “Is that what you were telling me in the alley way?”

_“Yeah.” Tommy answered, seemingly unaware about the situation._

“Tommy..I..I got to go.” He stuttered before placing his phone in his pocket and then running out of his room. Discarding the jacket on the floor, he ran. “Felicity!”

…

Felicity was grinning to herself. She didn’t even know why. Maybe it was because the drink tasted heavenly.

It was so yummy.

She thought about asking Raisa for one more glass. “Rai-“

“Felicity!”

“Oliver,” She smiled brightly, her eyes squinting behind her glasses.

Since when did everything seem so blurry?

She got up, her feet wobbling lightly before standing up her. The man in question appeared in front of her and Felicity showed her pearly whites, “Oliver.” She repeated before shoving the wine glass in his face, “Get me more.” Her voice was slurry as she ordered him.

“What-“

“It tastes heavenly” Felicity mumbled, licking her lips. “I want more” she shoved the glass against his chest, “Gimme more!”

“Fuck.” She heard him mumble and she almost gasped at the word, “You don’t swear, Oliver! You would get punished!” She looked around, “What if someone heard you?”

Oliver’s expression looked like he was constipated.

“I’m not-!” Oliver stopped mid-sentence, frustrated. He placed a hand on her cheek, his eyes meeting hers as he realized that her pupils were dilated. “Shit.” He mumbled and Felicity closed her eyes.

“Felicity,” He spoke softly while Felicity leaned her head against his palm, her eyes closed, “Are you listening to me?” Felicity hummed, her eyes still closed, “Soft.”

“You want more wine, don’t you?” Felicity’s eyes opened at that, a surprised gasp escaping her lips as she nodded her head vigorously, her lips pressed together, which oddly reminded Oliver of a child. “Then I will get you some.” He told her, “But right now, I need you to sit down, “He pushed her shoulders causing her to sit down on the couch. “Be a good girl and I’ll get you two glasses.”

“Two glasses?” Felicity’s tone was full of awe. “I want two glasses.” She clapped her hands together.

“For that you need to sit down,” Oliver bit back a smile seeing her expression. He pressed a finger against his lips and Felicity followed, “Keep quiet.”

“Keep quiet.” Felicity blinked and repeated the gesture.

Oliver eyes caught hold of the file that was on the table before he picked it up. Reading the title of the file, he held on it as he walked past her and headed towards the kitchen, telling Raisa to dump the bottle before walking past Felicity once again, who was sitting on the couch, a finger on her lips and headed up the stairs to fetch his jacket.

God, this was a big trouble.

Luckily, Felicity was behaving but for how long because he knew how tipsy she can get.

He didn’t notice Felicity’s eyes narrowing at the portrait of the Queen Family in the living room.

He definitely didn’t notice her glaring at Moira in the picture.

…

When Oliver came back, Felicity was gone.

Oliver swore to himself.

“Felicity?” He asked, his head moving around hoping to locate the blonde.

He heard someone giggle.

“Felicity?” his ears perked up but he didn’t find anyone.

“Oliver!” Felicity said his name and Oliver turned his head, only to see her standing at the top of the stairs.

How the hell did she reach there?

“Fe-“

“I am going to meet Moira, Oliver.” She declared with a huff and Oliver’s eyes widened. Her grammy and Thea were out. The only person inside the mansion was his mom, “I’m going to tell her that she is a bitch.”

“Felicity-“ Oliver started as he started running up the stair but Felicity only giggled as she started running towards her room. “Moira Derdenene Queen!”

She didn’t even get her name right.

“Fuck.” Oliver swore to himself as he ran after her.                                                     

Tonight is going to be one long night, isn’t it?

**…**


	13. The Drunk Adventures of Felicity Smoak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "They say it will get better, they lie. You just get used to it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so something happened and I screwed up. I sorta missed this chapter? Yeah, I am REALLY sorry. I don't know how I ended up skipping this. I am SO sorry.
> 
> Hope you like it. 
> 
> I am so sorry :(

Felicity remembered the first time she had pot brownie.

Well, she didn’t remember but her friends and Cooper had given her a vivid explanation of what she had done.

She screamed at a teacher (she remembered cringing when she had heard that) and had danced on a table.

And then she went into anaphylactic shock.

Right there on the table.

In front of everyone.

Which later on made Felicity sad. Because she did have a dream of getting drunk and someone just recording her antics.

Her allergy took the fun out of it.

But she did realize that being drunk heightened her emotions.

But, since then, she never really got drunk.

And so she never really went into her vampire mode (she seriously needed to stop watching television shows.)

She‘d wondered if that was a good thing or a bad one.

Because being drunk has its consequences.

But it sure is fun as hell.

Besides, she got drugged.

Not drunk.

Drugged.

Eh, that sounds worse.

…

“Moira!” Felicity screamed again. Her drunken self was grateful she was wearing white sneakers as her feet moved rapidly.

Meanwhile, a string of curses were coming out of Oliver’s mouth as he climbed up the stairs, two steps at a time. “Dammit!”

Felicity reached the door and narrowed her eyes at them.

Moira Queen was one diabolical woman.

She needed to be taught a lesson.

She moved back and raised her jean clad leg in the air. She had seen this in movies. She would kick the door open and Moira would be shocked before she would beg for forgiveness, crawling on her knees.

She grinned wickedly. But before she could do so, two strong arms held her waist and lifted her in the air. Felicity’s eyes turned into small planets and before she could open her mouth to scream, a hand was removed from her waist and placed on her mouth.

Still she screamed.

It was muffled.

Oliver groaned when he heard the sound of shuffling from the other end of the door. He held on to Felicity before moving his head. He spotted a door that he was sure was some sort of storeroom. They had tons of these small rooms across the house. Felicity’s head was against his chest when he spoke, “Don’t scream, okay?” He told her and Felicity’s eyes brightened as she nodded her head vigorously.

“Felicity.” He was serious.

Her eyes lowered and Oliver sighed before he removed his hand from her mouth, “Don’t.” He said again and before Felicity could blink he had opened the door and had pushed Felicity in, “Oliver!!”

“Stay inside and keep quiet. Or I won’t be getting you those drinks.” Oliver told her as he turned the light on and Felicity whimpered, “But-“

“Please.” Oliver looked at her and Felicity groaned, “But I want to-“

“Rude!” Felicity told him before kicking the door. She cursed the next second as pain resonated in her right foot. She hopped on it, “Frack.”

…

Oliver looked at his mother, his eyes wide, “Hey mom.” Moira smiled at him, “Did you call me?”

_“I did!”_

Moira frowned, “Wh-“

Oliver coughed violently, “I did.” He patted his chest before leaning down. He was standing way to close to the door to the storeroom. “I called you mom.”

“Why?” Moira’s eyebrows furrowed.

_“Because I wanted to tell you that you are a-“_

Oliver coughed even more violently. He leaned against the door and slammed his hand on it two times, rather harshly.

“Are you okay?” Oliver was acting weird.

“Of course.” Oliver answered, his back now against the door of the storeroom, “I was-“

Oliver frowned, his mind reeling.

“I was thinking about spending some time together with you and since dad is not around, I-” Oliver paused, “Yeah? I mean, it’s been way too long.” He had been far too caught up in all of this. He knew his dad wasn’t around and come to think of it, he really had been a reckless son of not thinking about his mom, “I don’t have the time now. You know…Laurel,” He added, “But tomorrow. A date?”

Moira grinned, her smile genuine, “Of course, sweetheart.”

“Are you heading to Laurel’s?”

“Yeah.” He answered, “I’ll see you later?” He asked her and Moira nodded, “Good night.”                           

“Night.”

The minute the door shut, Oliver opened the door to the storeroom.

His eyes flickered around. The yellow bulb illuminated the small room. A ladder was lying in one corner. They were wooden shelves towards his left where stacks of toilet paper and cloth that he was pretty sure was used for dusting were kept.

“Felicity?” He narrowed his eyebrows, trying to locate the blonde. A sound that was close to scowl resonated through the small space and Oliver blinked, “Felicity?”

A second later, he spotted her. Her blonde hair which weren’t in their usual ponytail were hiding her face which was pressed against knees that were brought up to her chest. She was hiding her face, the loose sleeves of her grey t-shirt hung loosely and he was sure that Felicity had deliberately pulled them forward.

She looked good.

It took a second for Oliver to realize that it was his t-shirt.

Before he could think about it further, she had lifted her head and was looking at Oliver. Then she turned her face away.

“Felicity?” Oliver’s eyebrows furrowed, “Go away.” She mumbled.

“What?”

“Go away.” Felicity declared, her pale coloured lips pouting involuntarily, “What?” Oliver questioned, “Why?”

“You pushed me in a closet.” Felicity turned her head sharply towards him, “You are a meanie,” She crossed her arms, “I don’t like meanies.”

“Fe-li-ci-ty.” Oliver groaned, his hands moving in air, “I-I just wanted to-“He racked his brain, “Mom has had a tough time. She is-“

“A bitch!” Felicity moved her arms in the air, her knees still buckled up. “You don’t know her Oliver,” She suddenly whispered, her eyes wide and innocent as if afraid that someone might hear them, “She looks at me like she will eat me.” She moved her hands in the air like claws, “Oh god,” She mumbled again this time to herself.

“She doesn’t-“Oliver tried protesting but Felicity shrugged him off, “She is.”

“My mother is not a bitch, Felicity.” Oliver said this as if trying to end the conversation.

“You’re right.” Felicity placed a finger on her chin and Oliver heaved a sigh of relief. “She is a ghost!”

“What?” Oliver blubbered out and Felicity blinked, her head moving up and down, “Yes! She is everywhere Oliver!” She said as she joined her hands, “She has an evil stare.” She narrowed her eyes.

“What? No-“

“No!” Felicity stopped him, “You don’t know her, Oliver! When I’m anywhere, she stares at me.” She narrowed her eyes. She pointed her index and middle finger at her eyes before pointing them towards Oliver’s blue ones, “Watching me. Always watching me.”

Oliver’ mouth parted open for a split second and Felicity continued to ramble, “She is.” Felicity’s voice trailed off, “Everywhere!” She said, her voice rising, her hands opening to show her palms to Oliver as she tried to exaggerate, “Everywhere.” She mumbled, “We need to find her body.”

Oliver sat down on his knees, “Is that all you think in your free time?”

Felicity ignored him before she reached for her phone.

“What are you doing?”

“Calling Dean and Sam, stupid.” Felicity shook her head at his idiocy, “They will salt and burn her body.” She scrunched her eyebrows, “Where did Moira perform voodoo magic when she was alive?” 

Oliver laughed all of a sudden before he bit his lip to control it. He snatched away her phone. “I’ll take that.” He told her before pocketing her phone. The last thing he needed was her drunk dialling someone.

“But Dean and Sam and Castiel-“ Felicity blubbered out, reaching for her phone but Oliver had already placed it in his pocket.

“I’ll talk to them,” He stated before shaking his head. Years later and she still was obsessed with television shows and books.

There was a time he found it adorable.

Now? He just wasn’t sure.

“Will you let me watch her burn?”

Oliver frowned, “Ye..ah?” He wasn’t sure how to answer that.

Felicity hummed happily and Oliver sighed. “Come on.” He stood up, offering her his hand.

Felicity curled further into the small space if that was even possible, “No, I want to sit here.”

“What?” Oliver closed his eyes, frustrated, “Felicity.”

“No,” She declared adamantly, “I will sit here.” She pointed her index finger towards the floor, “He..here.” She looked at him, “Here only.”

“Felicity.” Oliver warned.

“I will sit here!” She crossed her arms and pouted. “Here only. It’s comfy.”

Oliver in the next second had placed his arm underneath her knees and had lifted her up. Felicity squealed as she latched onto Oliver, her wide eyes gazing into his. “You might want to repeat that?”

Felicity huffed as Oliver carried her.

Oliver’s hold tightened on her. He remembered when he used to carry her and now that he thought of it, she hadn’t gained weight at all. She hadn’t changed. Her hair still smelled like strawberries and as if on cue, Felicity jiggled her head causing wisps of her blonde hair to hit his face. He closed his eyes involuntarily before opening them, only to find Felicity staring at him, “What?”

“Nothing.” Felicity smiled before she buried her face in his chest and Oliver felt his heart swell up. She was adorable and it had been so long since-he shook his head, “What are you doing?”

“Cuddling with my husband.” She grinned at him, “I love it when you carry me.” She stated and Oliver was caught off guard. He wanted to say something but he didn’t.

Why didn’t he say anything?

They reached the gate of the mansion and Oliver dropped Felicity down, although she did protest. “I’ll go get the car.”  He said softly, his hands landing on her shoulders, “And you stay put.” Felicity blinked her eyes, “I mean it Felicity. “ His tone was firm. “Don’t go anywhere.”

Felicity nodded.

Oliver ran towards his car. In normal situations, he wouldn’t have ran but Felicity was alone and he had a nagging feeling that this won’t end well.

When Oliver neared the gate, ready to move his car out when he bit back a groan realizing Felicity had left.

_Again._

“Now what?” It’s been _only_ half an hour since Felicity had been drunk and-

_Only freaking half an hour._

“Felicity!” He yelled, the minute he got out his black Mercedes. This attracted the attention of the two guards who were standing in front of the gate.

“Where is Miss. Smoak?”

The guards looked at each other for a second before pointing outside. Oliver’s eyebrows scrunched up as he walked out of the gate. He tried to look for Felicity amongst the people who were walking on the street only to find Felicity hugging a guy who had a huge white beard and bifocals, “Dumbledore!” She was yelling, hugging the guy happily whose expression Oliver couldn’t see. “You’re alive!”

Oliver didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

He walked towards his car and got in. His right hand was still bandaged but it had gotten better, thanks to his physiotherapist.

He stopped his car right in front of Felicity and the man before getting out. He bit his lip, trying to control his laughter as Felicity grinned at him, “Oliver! Look, Dumbledore!” She pulled the man’s cheek, “He is alive!” The old man looked at him and Oliver straightened up, “Felicity.”  He said softly, pulling her towards him and the blonde frowned.

“Let’s leave, okay? Dumbledore needs to be somewhere else.” He declared and Felicity frowned, “Where?” She looked at the man, “Would you take me to Hogwarts?”

The man looked surprized for a second before a small smile came on his face. “I’m so sorry, Sir. “ Oliver apologized, “She is just a little...” His voice trailed off. He certainly didn’t want to utter the word ‘drugged’ or ‘drunk’ for that matter because he knew that Felicity won’t believe it-

“Drunk. “ The man finished and Felicity narrowed her eyes at him while Oliver groaned.

“If I was drunk, I would know it Mister.” She glared at him, “Just because you are a wizard doesn’t mean you know everything. “ She let out a ‘humph’ before walking around the car and sitting on the seat beside the driver.

“I’m so sorry.” Oliver apologized again but the man laughed, “Don’t be.” He waved his hand in the air, “I get that every time.” He smiled, “Good night. “

“You too.” Oliver watched the man leave and frowned, his head tilting ever so slightly. Meanwhile, Felicity rolled down the window, “Did he leave?” She frowned, “I wanted a Hogwarts letter. “ Her gaze moved towards her lap.

“You’re too old. “

“I could be a professor.”

“Hogwarts isn’t that good of a school.” Oliver declared as he got inside the car.

“How would you know?” Felicity punched his arm, “Bloody muggles.” She mumbled and Oliver rolled his eyes as he started the car.

It was silence for the next ten seconds before Oliver turned towards her, “Now where do you live?”

Felicity frowned, “In a house, silly. “

“ _Where_ do you live, Felicity?”

“On the street, silly.” She answered before grinning at him.

“Felicity-“

His phone started ringing and he raised a finger in the air. Realizing that it was Laurel, he stopped the car at one side of the road before picking it up, “Hey Laurel, “

Felicity’s eyes fixated themselves on a sign in front of the club that said ‘Valentine’s day.’ She moved her head forward to read better. The name of the club was Sapphire and it had red lights.

Felicity liked red lights.

So, she got out of the car.

“Felicity!” Oliver yelled, placing a hand on the mouth of his phone as he watched the blonde’s retreating figure. “Laurel, I can’t. Not today. I’ll make up to you tomorrow,” He said hurriedly before hanging up and getting out of the car. He didn’t realize that he had left his phone in the car while doing so.

“Felicity!”

..

Felicity Smoak was pissed off.

The guard was eyeing her sceptically and wasn’t allowing her to go inside. He thought she wasn’t dressed club like. She even showed him her small purse that was in the back of her jean pocket and then her driver’s license-but no.

Asshole.

Luckily, she had a knight in shining armour.

 “Oliver!” She grinned the minute she him heading towards her. Oliver came and stood right beside her before taking a deep breath, “What did I tell you? No running-“

“They aren’t letting me in!”

The guard that to some extent resembled Mark Henry cocked an eyebrow towards Oliver, “You are with Oliver Queen?” He asked, his voice heavy.

Felicity nodded her head vigorously before she hooked her arm with Oliver’s. She smiled as she leaned her head on his shoulder, “He’s my husband.”

Oliver turned his head slightly. He was caught off guard as the guard looked at him, expecting a reply. He could have denied it, he should have denied it-

But he didn’t.

“I’m…I’m her husband.” He stuttered, looking at her and Felicity hummed in content when the guard allowed the two of them inside.

It took Oliver ten seconds to realize what had just happened.

And then another five to realize that they were in Max Fuller’s club.

Oh crap.

“Hey Queen,”

And there he was, the devil himself.

Could this night get worse?

“Hey! Aren’t you the guy whose fiancé Oliver screwed long before we met?”

He jinxed it, didn’t he?

“Oliver.” Max greeted the two with a smile and Oliver flashed him a forced one, “What brings you here? Is our party better than the one at Verdant’s?”

“No,” Oliver smiled, “We just came here to see what not to do the next time we celebrate Valentine’s Day at Verdant.”

Meanwhile, Felicity had unhooked her arm from Oliver’s, her hand latching onto his hand instead as her eyes flickered around. They were loads of people out here. The song ‘Kiss me’ by Ed Sheeran was echoing through the club. They were couples slow dancing. The ambience was perfect. Red balloons and soft music. The environment was surreal.

“Oliver!” Felicity pulled his hand, “Let’s dance!” She pulled his arm and Oliver let her because he seriously needed to get away from Fuller.

The minute Fuller was out of sight, Oliver heaved a sigh of relief before looking at Felicity who was looking at him. He let out a breathy laugh, “I don’t dance, Felicity. You know that.”

Felicity frowned, “But today is Valentine’s Day and you always dance with me!” She pouted but Oliver simply shook his head before he pulled her hand, “No and we’re leaving.”

“No!” Felicity protested before she released her hand from his, “I’ll go dance on my own.” She huffed before walking away and Oliver pinched the bridge of his nose, frustrated.

“Felicity!” He said her name the umpteenth time that night.

It was weird.

How much he had loved her name to how he didn’t like anyone uttering her name for quite a long time. How he despised that name and now a month in since she has been in Starling and all he is doing is blubbering out her name.

With so much ease.

Felicity always knew how to get to him, didn’t she?

…

Felicity huffed again before stomping her foot rather harshly and making her way towards the bar top. The song had changed to John Legend’s ‘All of me’ and Felicity really wanted to dance.

Her wish was answered in the form of Max Fuller approaching her. He smiled at her and Felicity grinned back, “Wanna dance?”

Felicity jiggled her head as a yes before placing her hand in his.

She really wanted to dance.

Max shot her a coy smile. He was about to lead her to the dance floor when a hand was pressed tightly against his shoulder.

Oliver gritted his teeth as he eyed the two set of hands, “I think I can manage that.” He told him and Max glared at him, “The lady will get what she wants, Oliver. And right now, she wants to dance.”

“I said, I can manage that.” Oliver repeated, “She is my _wife,_ Max. So, I suggest you let go of her hand.” His hold on Max’s shoulder tightened. The word wife came out involuntarily and it took a second for Oliver to realize.

“Weren’t you two divorced?” He paused, “I don’t see a wedding right eit-“ Before he could finish both of the occupants retaliated.

Oliver’s lips formed a thin line and Felicity suddenly pulled her hand away from Max, “I don’t like you.” She declared, moving herself closer to Oliver.

Oliver cocked an eyebrow at Max, “I believe the lady spoke.” Max glared at Oliver before turning around and walking away.

“What is wrong with you?!” Oliver turned towards Felicity and she narrowed her eyes at him, “What did I do?”

“Dancing with Max, Felicity?”

“You refused to dance with me.” Felicity poked her index finger in his chest, “You. You!” She kept poking his chest.

Oliver looked away, not knowing what to do. His eyes caught the sight of a couple of tequila shots lying on the bar, a half cut lemon lying beside it. He moved his hand, picking up the lemon, “Here. Eat this.” He shoved the lemon in her face. Lemon would help. He didn’t have lemonade here and he could ask, but he was really lacking patience.

Lemon it was.

 “Eat this?” Felicity eyed the yellow fruit. She licked it before squeezing her eyes as the taste hit her buds, “It’s too sour!”

“It’s a lemon, what do you think?!”

Felicity glared at Oliver before throwing away the lime. “Did you joke?” She blinked her eyes, “Ha ha ha.” She clapped her hands sardonically, “Idiot.” She mumbled as she threw the lemon away.

“Felicity!”

Unfortunately for her, it landed in a girl’s drink causing it to spill on her not so cheap white dress.

And then the girl screamed.

Oliver groaned.

Felicity giggled.

Oliver honestly thought that it might be the end of it but the girl walked towards them and shoved Felicity real hard, “You bitch.”

As if on cue, the music stopped.

Like, really?

“What?” Oliver let out before stepping in between, “It was a mistake, let’s calm down, okay?”

“What calm down?!” Felicity yelled, anger radiating off her, “You bloody- !” She was cut off when Oliver tried to pull her back, “Don’t call me a bitch, _bitch_!” She narrowed her eyes at her.

“Felicity, sweetheart, calm down.” Oliver said, his back still facing Felicity, “I’m sorry, Miss. This wasn’t supposed to happen,” He raised his hands in surrender, “I apologize.” He flashed her his ‘playboy’ grin, hoping she’ll melt. “I’ll buy you a drink too.” He moved his fingers in the air and the bartender nodded his head.

She eyed him warily for a second before smiling slowly.

“It’s..okay.” She did calm down, “Just control the leach.” She pointed towards Felicity, a pissed off look on her face before walking away.

“Thank you.” Oliver uttered.

At least something was going right.

“I’m not a leach you fuck-“ Oliver turned around and immediately placed a hand on Felicity’s mouth. She kept on babbling, her voice muffled and he could see her eyes widen every now and then.

He knew she was cursing.

When she became quiet, he removed her hand. “You shouldn’t really curse, you know?” 

“She deserved it.” Felicity hummed before crossing her arms. Oliver bit his lip.

“I see you have made quite a big scene, here.” Max made his presence known again and Oliver bit his lip, “Max, not now. Felicity let’s go-“

“I don’t want to go.” She stomped her right foot on the ground and Max grinned like a cheshire cat, “You can leave Oliver. I’m here.” He smiled before wrapping an arm around Felicity’s waist and squeezing it.

Oliver narrowed his eyes. He gritted his teeth before grabbing Felicity’s arm and pulling her towards himself, “She is _my_ wife, Max. I can take care of her. Mind your own fucking business.” He said harshly before looking towards Felicity. This time the use of the word ‘wife’ was intentional and he didn’t regret it.

“We’re leaving.” He declared and pulled her arm.

Now he knew why Max hadn’t kicked them out in the first place. He wanted to mess with him by using Felicity.

Why didn’t he think of this before?

“Bye Max!” Felicity yelled happily as Oliver dragged her out of the club. The minute he let go of her hand, she glared at him. The two were standing on the threshold of the club, right in the middle of the street. It was probably two am at night and the silence was deafening.

“You are such a party pooper, “Felicity murmured, “We should have stayed inside. But no, you have to mess things up.” She uttered, “Ahhh! Look at me I’m all broody!” She puffed out her chest, “I wanted to enjoy. You know what? I’m going in!”

“Felicity!” Oliver suddenly yelled at the top of his voice.

He was furious.

The image of Max wrapping his arm around her was burning in the back of his mind.

“I don’t want to deal with all of this, right now, okay? We’re leaving means we’re leaving.”

Felicity blinked.

And then she shoved him real hard.

It was like a sudden switch. Her voice rose,“Don’t shout at me!”  She told him and it was a wonder why the guard standing in front of the club hadn’t approached them yet.

“What-“

Oliver didn’t anticipate what was coming next. A sound echoed across the space and he blinked, his head turned towards right, his cheek red.

_She had slapped him._

“You know that I don’t like you shouting!” She continued to yell, “I don’t like this side of yours.” She crossed her arms.

Oliver’s gaze darkened as he stared her. “Did you just fucking slap me?”

Felicity nodded her head happily, “I wanted to teach you a lesson.” She clapped her hands, “You left me. You screwed that woman while I watched. You walked out! You! You!” She poked his chest, “And then you shout at me!” She narrowed her eyes at him, “So, I slapped you.” She rubbed her hands together. “I’ve always wanted to do that for so long.” She mentally smiled, “You deserved it.” She scowled.

Oliver saw red. She was the only person who knew how to press his buttons and she had. It was the  thought again. The thought of Ray and her made his anger reach its peak.

Oliver eyes narrowed at her all of a sudden and before Felicity could retaliate, he was cornering her against the wall _wanting_ her to listen to him once. “I slept with that bitch because you were with Ray.” He bit out, “You chose him over us.” He glared, and Felicity stared at him, not turning her eyes away once. “No, I-“

Oliver stared at her, “You know what?” He started, “Go inside and be with Max too! That’s all you know how to do, don’t you, Felicity?”

Felicity felt tears in her eyes as she pushed Oliver away, “Stay away from me!” She pushed his chest violently, “I never was with Ray. You are a bastard, Oliver!” She yelled in her loud voice.

“I never was with Ray,” She whispered before hugging herself before glaring at Oliver, “You screwed that bitch!” She glared at him and Oliver huffed before turning his face away. “You ruined our relationship.” She mumbled

“I hate you.” Felicity said with disgust and Oliver suddenly turned to look towards her, his expression softening for a second.

“Then what is stopping me here?” He regained his momentum and shot Felicity a sharp glare. She narrowed her eyes at him before mumbling, “Get lost then.”

Oliver raised his hand in the air as if trying to say something before turning around and walking away.

Felicity felt tears dripping down her cheeks as she hugged herself tighter.  

She sat down, her back against the wall and cried.

She fucking hated Oliver Queen.

…

Oliver started his car and gritted his teeth. He recalled the conversation and his hand on the power steering tightened.

_I never was with Ray._

They say, drunk words are sober thoughts?

What if- Oliver shook his head, she was drugged and it was too late.

_I hate you, Oliver Queen_

He felt a pang in his chest _._

He stopped the car before slamming his hand against the steering wheel.

She was drugged, what about him?

He should have had control on himself.

He recalled her face that had been coiled in pain when he realized he had left her there.

She wasn’t even in her senses. For once in a long while, it had felt that both their anger was out in the open. Is that what happens? When three years later, you _finally_ allow yourself to confront some of it?

He fucked up, didn’t he?

He growled, “Fuck.” He mumbled before getting out of the car.

He needed to fix this.

He was the one who got her into this mess.

He was the one who will get her out of it.

…

“Hey,” Oliver mumbled as he approached her, his hands tucked in his jean pockets and Felicity looked up, glaring at him through her tear filled eyes, “Go away.”

“I’m...I’m sorry, okay?” He closed his eyes, “You just-“ He opened them, “You made me angry. It doesn’t justify this, I am sorry.”

Felicity rose to her feet, “You hurt me!” She shouted at him before turning her head away, “I hate you.” She wiped her tears with her hands, “Get lost.”

Oliver sighed, he knew she wouldn’t listen to him. “Come here.” He said softly and Felicity shook her head, “No. You are a meanie.”

Oliver let out a breathy laugh before he stepped in front of her, “Does it hurt?” They were standing mere inches away from each other, “Where does it hurt?”

“You care?” She scoffed.

Oliver decided to ignore her comment and pressed his hand against the right side of her head, “Here?” He asked her before pressing his hand at the back of her head, “Here?” He mumbled again and Felicity pressed her lips together, but did not say a word.

Oliver sighed as he pressed the area tightly and rubbed his hand against it, “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have reacted that way.” He told her again and Felicity looked up, “Sorry doesn’t make everything better, asshole.”

“I know. You’re drugged and still you have the sass,” Oliver noted and Felicity sniffed, “It’s not sass. I am stating facts.” She tilted her head sideways as the light hit her on face and Oliver could see she was still crying, “I’m not drugged.” She paused, “If I was drugged, I would know it. I went to MIT.”

“I know that,” Oliver grinned, “You’re the smartest.” He told her instead and Felicity let out a huff and nodded again.

“Don’t ever hurt me again, okay?”

She looked innocent and suddenly Oliver felt his mind reeling back.

Hurt.

He wanted to laugh a little.

If only the situation had been different.

If only.

But still, he answered it with utmost sincerely.

He tilted his head sideways, his eyes closing for a split second, “ _Never_.”

“Good. I’m okay now.”

“Then why are you still crying?” He asked her and Felicity closed her eyes allowing the water to escape, “I don’t know.” She told him, “My eyes like to sweat.” She huffed.

“Really?” Oliver smiled, “Is that why you stink?” He pulled her glasses out, Felicity eyes following him. Oliver wiped the moisture on her spectacles with the help of his jeans. He blew a little on each frame before putting it back on Felicity, “There.” He made a face when he noticed Felicity’s serious expression, “You still stink though.” He hoped it would cheer her up.

Felicity raised her arms in the air before sniffing them, “I don’t stink.” She told him a second later, “Do you think I stink?” She frowned, “I bought this new roll on so I shouldn’t sweat. Do you think the people of Dove screwed with me?”

Oliver let out a breathy laugh before he cupped her face with his bandaged hand. Felicity tilted her head sideways, a small smile on her face as Oliver used his thumb to wipe away the moisture. The gesture was soft and slow and Oliver found himself gazing into her eyes. Felicity blinked and Oliver suddenly snapped out of it before he took a step away.

Felicity frowned.

“Uh, we should go.” He muttered and Felicity nodded before wrapping her arms around herself. Oliver saw her doing this and sighed before taking off his jacket and holding it out for Felicity, “Here.” He said and Felicity took it. He was wearing a black t-shirt underneath.

“Such a gentleman.” Felicity grinned before moving her hand to touch his face, “Good boy.” She smiled as she moved his face sideways with her hand, “You aren’t that bad, you know?” She grinned and pushed his sideways one more time. Oliver’s mouth parted open. Felicity took the jacket and moved her right arm through it followed by the left. A huff escaped her lips before she pouted because the jacket was too big for her.

Oliver smiled, sometimes he forgot how tiny she really was. It was still the same thing. Somethings never really change. He sighed before holding Felicity’s hand and folding the sleeve that was way too long for Felicity’s arm. Both the arms. He fixed the collar and then moved her hair sideways. Felicity smiled, “Now, should we go?”

“Oliver Queen,” Felicity started, “You are not a meanie anymore.”

Oliver huffed out in amusement. Drunk Felicity was kind of adorable, “I’m sorry again,” He whispered this time.

Felicity simply shook her head, “It’s okay. I slapped you too.”

“Nah, I think I deserved that one.”

“That, you did.”

Whoever said that marriage is a relationship where one person is always right and the other is the husband was a bloody genius.

Really.

A genius.

She was right though.

She always was.

…

**February 2009**

_For a genius Felicity should have figured out what Oliver was up to. But she hadn’t been able to because Oliver Queen had completely blown her away._

_She twitched her fingers, a parody of Oliver’s habit that she had caught without even realizing. She was really nervous because it was their first date. She still remembered Oliver pumping his fists in the air when she finally had said yes after a month and giggled._

_She sat on the chair and twitched every now and then. Oliver was late and it wasn’t really a surprise but she really hoped he would come soon or else she would overdose on benzos. She already had taken three of them and was contemplating whether she should go for the fourth one or not._

_Luckily for her, Oliver decided to make his presence known within the next few moments. She whipped her head to see him and he looked-_

_Wow._

_She had seen him in suits before but right now, he looked really hot in his three piece blue suit._

_It was pretty formal._

_But Felicity liked it._

_Oliver smiled at her while walking and Felicity got up the second he came to stand in front of the table. The two looked at each other before exchanging a nervous look and hugged the other. It was nice and certainly lacked the awkwardness that Felicity had felt the first time round. They parted away, their hands that they had interlocked during the hug lingered while doing so._

_“What?” Felicity questioned seeing his expression._

_“Sorry, I’m just-“ Oliver mumbled as he sat down._

_Oliver Queen was nervous and Oliver Queen was never nervous._

_The power that this girl held over him._

_“Nervous?” Felicity supplied, “Line forms behind me.” She laughed and Oliver smiled lightly before looking at the waiter, “Scotch.”_

_“Water for me,” Felicity spoke and Oliver stopped the waiter before looking at Felicity, his eyebrows hiking up, “Are you sure? Because it might sorta help with-“_

_“Alcohol is not going to mix well with the three benzos I took.” Felicity laughed and Oliver let the waiter go._

_“Am I being crazy?” Oliver asked Felicity, “I mean what do we have to be nervous about?”_

_Felicity leaned forward, “Well, we’ve already exhausted what normally people talk about on their first date,” She said, “And second date. And third date. And every date.” She ranted, “I’ve even seen you shirtless.” She told him to prove a point recalling the time when she was waiting for him at his house and he had just gotten out of shower and-she leaned back and curled her lip inwards, her cheeks red before moving forward, “Multiple times.” She uttered, eyeing the napkin like it was the most fascinating thing she had ever seen before stopping, reaching for the glass of water that the waiter had just placed on the table._

_“So?” Oliver asked, interlocking the fingers of his hands together, “Now, that we’ve established that you love seeing me shirtless, what else should we talk about?”_

_Felicity tilted her head sideways. Was there anything about Oliver Queen that she didn’t know? “I don’t..know?”_

_Okay, what if they had a really sucky first date?_

_And then, they decide they were better off friends?_

_It would break their friendship._

_The thought itself made her want to cry._

_“Hey,” Oliver whispered and she felt him holding her hand, “Nothing will go wrong, okay?” And Felicity frowned, she said that thought out loud, didn’t she?_

_Uhh._

_But for the first time she was grateful. She knew she didn’t have the courage to verbalise it on her own._

_Felicity smiled, “Yeah.”_

_“Okay, now let’s talk about when you first found out you liked me.” He flashed her a cocky grin, “Was it when I saved you? Or was it when we hugged?” His eyes widened, “It was when I stayed at your house for a day wasn’t it? You realized you found me sexy-“He grinned cockily and Felicity shoved him._

_“You’re impossible!”_

_Oliver laughed, “Only for you.”_

_Felicity rolled her eyes._

_…_

_“Here.” Oliver turned his head right, “This is the best ice cream place in town.” He pivoted his head towards Felicity, “You eat ice cream here once and I swear, you’ll come back here again and again.” He grinned._

_“Oh.kay.” Felicity smiled before frowning as she the people, “We’re dressed formally. It’s going to be awkward.”_

_Oliver cocked an eyebrow, “Since when do you care what people think?” He nudged her, “Come on.” He bit out and Felicity let out a breathy laugh before getting out of the car._

_The name of the shop was ‘Frozen’ which was highlighted in blue and white giving the illusion that it was ice. Felicity realized that they were an awful lot of people here but then she figured out that it was ten pm, so of course people would come here for dessert. Oliver held out his hand for her and she took it and the two of them headed inside._

_“Hey Mrs.P,” Oliver greeted the elderly woman who was behind the counter. The lady smiled, her brown eyes lighting up. Her hair was in a bun and the warm expression on her face reminded Felicity of Raisa, “Oliver!” She said happily before walking through the small space beside the counter. She walked past the rest of the customers and made her way towards him._

_“Oliver!” She said as she hugged him and Felicity smiled, her hand still in Oliver’s. “Is this Felicity?” She looked at the blonde and Felicity was surprised, her eyes shifted to Oliver for a second before Mrs. P hugged her, “I’ve heard a lot about you, dear.” And Oliver blushed._

_“Hopefully good stuff.” She let out and laughed._

_The elderly lady winked, “Definitely good stuff.”_

_…_

_“How come you’ve never taken me to this place before?” Felicity asked Oliver. The two of them were standing in a park that was right behind the ice cream parlour. The park had a bridge, underneath which water from a river-Felicity didn’t know the name of- flowed. The two were leaning against the railing of the bridge._

_Oliver finished his ice cream before wiping his hands with a tissue, “I wanted to take you out here on a date, not just randomly. Besides, you don’t expect me to tell you all about my secret hideouts, do you?”_

_“So you do have secret hideouts,” Felicity started, “I had secret hideouts too. But then mom discovered it-“ She pouted involuntarily, “And it all got ruined.”_

_Oliver turned around, his back against the railing, “I have a lot of secret hideouts.” His eyebrow rose, “Really?” Felicity gave him a lopsided grin, “Will I get to see them?”_

_“Absolutely not.”_

_Felicity punched Oliver with her left hand. Before she could take her hand away, Oliver pulled it towards himself, “So,” He started, his eyes widening as he looked at Felicity._

_“So?” Felicity tilted her sideways, perfectly aware of what he was thinking, “So, what?” She shrugged her shoulders._

_“For a genius you really are dumb, you know?”_

_“Hey!” Felicity protested, trying to pull her hand away, “You’re being mean.”_

_“It’s true.” Oliver answered before pulling her towards himself. He leaned a little bit closer, way too close, “After the first date-“ Felicity placed her right hand in front of her mouth, “I have a third date rule.” She told him._

_“What?” Oliver frowned, “Really?”_

_“Well,” Felicity started, “Not really. But I’ve definitely not kissed guys on the first date itself. Well, I didn’t have that many of first dates though, which, “She frowned, “Sounds bad.” She shivered, “But the point is, I definitely don’t kiss-“_

_She was stopped by a pair of lips on the top of hers._

_Soft lips._

_Really soft._

_Oh._

_Oh._

_It took her five seconds to retaliate as Oliver’s hand cupped her cheek ever so slowly, his other hand travelling to her back, which was bare thanks to the her backless dress. She shivered as she kissed him back, her eyes closing while her hands held on to the lapels of his jacket which she pulled tighter. His lips were soft and gentle. The two of them wanted to savour this moment. It was unlike other kiss Felicity had ever had. It wasn’t hot, it was sweet and passionate._

_And filled with love._

_She had imagined kissing him a hell lot of times and her imagination didn’t do him justice._

_No freaking away._

_Felicity smiled as Oliver pulled away for a second before kissing her one last time. Their foreheads leaned against each other momentarily before she tilted her face upwards, “I like this. The next time I’m on a first date with someone, I’ll definitely kiss him.”_

_Oliver wrapped his arms around her waist, “The next first date, huh?” He asked her and Felicity nodded, her eyes closed, “Probably with a billionaire.” She answered, a mischievous smile on her face as she linked her arms behind his neck, “Who would kiss me all the time and buy me stuff-“_

_Oliver leaned down kissing her lips gently, “Like this?”_

_Felicity made a face, “I don’t know.” She uttered, “Show me again?” She tilted her head and Oliver laughed._

_And then he kissed her again._

…

“Again?” Oliver groaned, “Felicity, one last time-where do you live?” He asked her, “Please be serious.”

“In a house, “Felicity answered nonchalantly before picking up his phone that was lying on the dashboard, “Down the street.” Oliver’s ears perked up, “On the street!” She ended with a clap of her hands and Oliver groaned.

Although he was grateful about one fact, she wasn’t in a sore mood

And now that he thought about it, he wasn’t in one either.

Funny, how half an hour ago they were fighting and here they were.

Funny indeed.

Oliver’s eyes shifted towards the phone in her hand that happened to be his.

“Phone,” He muttered, “Of course!” He slammed his hand against his forehead

How could he be so stupid?

He snatched his phone out of Felicity’s hands and Felicity protested, “Hey!”

Oliver sighed before stopping the car near the street yet again. He pressed the speed dial for Digg’s number and then pressed the phone against his ear, muttering under his breath.

He really needed him to pick up his phone.

But it rang.

It rang and nothing happened.

He pinched the bridge of his nose before Felicity poked his arm. He turned his head sideways and she offered him her phone that she found in his jacket, “You look stressed.” She pointed out and Oliver bit back a smile. His eyes furrowed as he stared at her phone.

Maybe he could call Palmer.

But he definitely didn’t want to call Palmer.

Still, he had no option did he?

He took her phone and Felicity took his face. Her eyes brightened as she stared at his wallpaper, his passcode was an easy thing to crack-"Oliver, let’s take a picture!” She said excitedly as she stared at the selfie of Tommy, Laurel and him. “Then you can make it your wallpaper.” She told him, “I don’t like Laurel on your wallpaper.” She told him sincerely and Oliver frowned before shaking his head, “No-“

“You said no on the dance floor too!” She punched his arm, “You always ruin my day!” She mumbled before crossing her arms and turning her face away, “I want a picture. They are all I have, you know?” She pouted her lips.

Oliver sighed and took a deep breath, “Will that make you happy?”

Felicity turned towards him and nodded her head, “Yes. Yes!”

_They are all I have._

Felicity snapped a picture of the two of them and for once, Oliver tried to ignore the way her thumb skimmed over their faces as if she has done this before. As if she this was all she had – _memories._

“Now, can I call?” He asked her and Felicity nodded. She looked at Oliver’s phone and chose to play Circle meanwhile.

Oliver huffed before sliding his finger across her screen. “Passcode?” He mumbled and surprisingly, Felicity answered that in an instant.

Oliver shrugged the stray thoughts before entering the digits and frowned when he saw the wallpaper. It was a picture of baby Sara and her, the two of them cuddling together. And despite the fact the fact that it confused him of how they knew of each other, he smiled.

She was grinning at the child her arms wrapped around the little girl who was grinning widely, showing her two missing front teeth.

Is this how she would have been if Conner was alive?

If only.

...

So, Oliver tried calling Diggle and then Palmer. Hell, he even called Gerry wondering if he knew where Felicity lived.

But no one picked up, no one.

To make matters worse, Felicity’s phone died.

Oliver had to hastily add the numbers in his phone before it switched off. He had tried calling again a few number of times. He called Ray and at his home to, much to his chagrin but no one picked up.

He also discovered that he had missed calls from Tommy, Laurel and Thea.

He wanted to call them back but didn’t.

He simply messaged them that he was safe and will meet them in the morning.

He had much bigger things to worry about.

Now, where was he supposed to take Felicity?

“Cause I give you all of me. And you give me all of you, “Felicity sang with the radio, opening her arms, “I give you all of me. And you give me all of you!” She ended the song, “Oh oh!”

Oliver laughed. The only thing remotely entertaining in the past hour was Felicity. She sang well, Oliver knew that but it was her gestures and her expressions. For the past half an hour she had been singing all the songs that had been playing on the radio and Oliver wasn’t surprised. Even during the time when they were together, Felicity had a habit of listening to songs.

He had watched her sing ‘Dance till the world ends’, followed by ‘A-team’ and then by ‘Never say Never’ and then best one yet, ‘Eye of the Tiger’.

It was fun.

Seeing Felicity smile like that. It had been a while since he had done that, for once it felt like they were back to their old selves. There was nothing between them, no baggage whatsoever – it was just a nice light hearted moment.

Not to mention, it kept her distracted and made her _laugh._ Suffice it to say, Oliver absolutely loved it.

 It was good.

Oliver was having fun.

He was smiling.

So was she.

But it didn’t hide away the real situation.

_It never really goes away, does it? They just had to get used to it._

He really needed to take Felicity somewhere.

…

Felicity eyes widened the minute the entered the gate and she looked at Oliver, “Are we home?” Her tone was laced with excitement and Oliver hesitated for a second, before nodding, “Yeah.” He mumbled.

He had no other option.

So, he took her to their old house.

He parked the car in the parking lot before getting out. Felicity blinked her eyes repeatedly as she got out, a huge smile on her lips. She pulled the jacket closer to herself as she started to walk behind Oliver.

They were home.

…

Felicity entered the house and she pivoted her head in all directions. She squealed as she saw that the house hadn’t changed one bit, “This is our house Oliver!” She told him excitedly while he dropped the keys in the bowl on the table beside the door.

Felicity’s feet moved on the hardwood floor as she smiled. The house had brick walls at some ends when went well with the soft shade of cream on the other part of the walls. Two brown couches faced each other forming a ‘u’, cushions lying on them haphazardly, a table lying between them that had two small pots placed on it. Right in front of the table was a LCD set, right in the middle of two wooden shelves full of books.

It was home.

Oliver smiled wryly before putting his hands in his jean pocket. There was time a when they were pictures of Felicity, Conner and him around the house. Now, it was just Conner and him.

Felicity whipped her head only to find herself gazing at the kitchen and right on cue, her stomach growled, “I’m hungry.” She declared and Oliver frowned, “What?”

“I’m hungry.” She shrugged, “I want food.” She started walking towards the kitchen, “Loads and loads of food.”

Oliver pinched the bridge of his nose, just when he thought the situation was getting better.

…

“Just stop alright?” Oliver looked at Felicity who had a huge knife in her hand. She was still wearing his jacket, Oliver didn’t know where the apron was, her tongue sticking out as she focused on cutting the piece of chicken, “Why do you want me to stop?” She narrowed her eyes at Oliver, the knife pointed dangerously close to his neck. Oliver took a step back, his eyes widening, “Because you are tired.”

He couldn’t say that she was drunk-drugged.

He kept forgetting that fact.

“So you would cook?” Felicity crossed her arms, the knife held in one hand, “But you don’t know how to cook.”

“I know how to cook.”

“No, you don’t, “Felicity started before she made a face, “Bleh.” She muttered with disgust, her tongue coming out, “You make bad food.”

“I-“ Oliver leaned over before snatching the knife, “don’t.” He muttered.

“You do.” Felicity nodded her head and Oliver walked past her to fetch some water for the rice, “I have gotten better, okay?” Oliver defended himself, “And look who is talking it’s because of me you learned how to cook in the first place.”

“Did not!”

“Did too!”

Oliver turned around, holding the utensil with water in it. He grinned at Felicity, “Now, I’ll teach you how to cook.”

Just then his hip collided with the slab causing the water to spill on him.

Felicity laughed loudly.

…

**March 2009**

_Felicity smiled to herself as she stood beside Thea, her hands interlocked. She was eagerly waiting for Oliver to come. They were at Verdant and Oliver and Tommy had been super busy with everything._

_So, Felicity decided to cook for him, for them._

_Oliver recently had told her that he loved Italian, red sauce pasta to be pretty specific, so Felicity decided to cook something for him. They had been dating for a month and she felt like both Tommy and he had been working really hard and they deserved a break._

_Although it was tough. She had googled all kinds of recipes and had made tons of mistakes. From boiling the pasta wrong to actually adding too much of chilly, she had made every sort of mistake._

_But in the end she made it the right away._

_She hoped she did._

_Laurel made her way past them and Felicity looked at her, not knowing what to say._

_It had been very awkward._

_But Laurel did flash her a ghost of a smile as she walked by. Sara who was behind her grinned at Felicity before making her way towards her, “What are you guys waiting for?”_

_“Oliver and Tommy,” She muttered back to Sara. Now to be honest, she didn’t know Sara that well. Come to think of it, she didn’t even know Laurel that well. But Sara and she were acquaintances. They were neighbours who smiled at one another, she was Oliver’s friend. Now, she wasn’t as close to her as she was with Tommy and Thea but she didn’t mind her company._

_Sara was nice girl, yeah._

_“Why?” Sara asked placing her hands on her hips, “She cooked for them. Well, Oliver to be pretty specific.” Thea supplied, her gaze wandering towards the liquor that laid on the bar top. Felicity placed her left hand on her cheek and turned her gaze away, “Hey!”_

_“You’re too young!”_

_“It’s not like I’m drinking!”_

_Felicity was about to reply when Oliver made his presence known._

_“Hey,” He walked towards Felicity before leaning down for a kiss, “Hey.” Her eyes closed as he leaned in, a bright smile on her lips._

_She could never get tired of Oliver kissing her._

_Never._

_“Uh,” Thea poked Oliver’s arm, “Little sister right here?” She raised her hands and Oliver flicked her forehead, “You too Speedy.” Before Sara could protest, he said hi to her too._

_“Where’s Tommy?”_

_“Still in the back talking to the bartenders,” Oliver told Felicity, “Laurel went to meet him.”_

_Oliver’s gaze flickered towards the chair right in front of the bar. It was a box and his eyes squinted before he reached for it, picking it up._

_Opening the box, his eyes widened,_ _“Is this pasta?” He picked up the fork, “I wanted to have Italian today. Who brought this?” Before anyone could answer him, he put the fork on his mouth. He cringed at first before taking another bite of the food, almost as if testing it._

_Felicity exchanged a look with Thea while biting her lip._

_And then Oliver placed his arm on the bar top and pulled out a tissue._

_And then, he threw up in it._

_Felicity gaped._

_“Who the hell brought this?” He asked, his face coiling to show disgust, “Yuck. This is so bad.” He murmured before reaching for another tissue and wiping his mouth with it. He looked at Thea, his left hand clutching the box, “Did you bring this from the place down town? You know I don’t-“ Thea was shaking her violently, her eyes big._

_“What?”_

_Just then Felicity stomped her right foot before turning around and walking away._

_“What?” Oliver looked at Thea and Sara. The latter shook her head, “You’re an idiot, Ollie. She cooked it.”_

_“What?”_

_“She cooked it for you and you basically told her it was crap. Way to go big brother,” Thea crossed her arms._

_“Shit.” Oliver muttered, “I’m in big trouble, aren’t I?” Sara nodded, “Big one.”_

_…_

_Felicity huffed to herself as she crossed her arms across her chest. Tears threatened to make their presence known but Felicity refused to cry._

_Who did he think he was?_

_She had worked for days over it. Well, you could say she was stupid enough to not taste it but still, she had tasted the previous attempts and they turned out okay, so she expected this one to be good too. Especially because it smelled really good._

_She’d wondered what went wrong._

_Maybe Oliver lacked taste buds._

_She huffed._

_“So,” She heard Oliver say and she turned around, narrowing her eyes, “Go away.”_

_Oliver smiled sheepishly, still holding the lunch box, “So, you cooked, huh?”_

_Felicity scowled, “Yes I did. And you are an ungrateful fool.” She stated, “How can you be so mean? I worked hours on it!” She raised her hands in the air, “For days, Oliver! And you say it sucks which it did, okay! You could have been a bit more polite?”_

_Oliver laughed, “Polite? Felicity eating that was potential suicide.” Felicity gasped, taking a step forward, her hands flaying in the air, “Oliver! You’re so mean-“_

_Oliver took this as an opportunity and stabbed the pasta on the fork before putting it in her mouth. Felicity’s eyes widened as she tasted it before turning around and throwing it out of her mouth, “See?” Oliver retorted._

_“Yuck!” Felicity wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, “That’s gross. This is even worse than my mom’s food.” She could still could feel the taste of it lingering in her mouth. The salt was too much, the oregano was almost as if it wasn’t there and she was pretty sure that the pasta was undercooked._

_“And you wanted me to eat it,” Oliver declared and Felicity pouted, “I worked really hard, you know?”_

_“And I love it,” Oliver placed his free hand on his cheek before pressing his thumb near her eye, wiping away the moisture, “I love the effort, thank you for it.” He paused and Felicity looked at him. She knew him well enough to know that he was biting back a retort, “Just the next time stick to computers rather than the kitchen.”_

_Felicity gasped before shoving him lightly. She tried to be angry at him and Oliver laughed, “What? It’s true!” He exclaimed and Felicity wanted to say something back but instead she just laughed, “You’re an asshole.”_

_“Your asshole.”_

_“Really?” Felicity raised her eyebrows. On the outside she may laugh at this but on the inside her heart melted into a pile of goo._

_Oliver shot her a smile, “Yup. But the next time, you want me alive, just lay off the cooking why don’t you?” Felicity laughed while whacking his arm. Oliver made a face before picking up the fork, the pasta stuck on it, “Here.”_

_“What?” Felicity asked, bewildered, “I am not eating it.”_

_“I ate two bites,” Oliver shoved the fork, “You would eat two too.” He huffed, “You screamed at me.”_

_“You were being a mean!”_

_“You almost got me killed.” Oliver pointed out and Felicity’s bottom lip jutted out, “No.”_

_Oliver raised an eyebrow and Felicity cringed before opening her mouth. Oliver smiled and made her eat the pasta. Felicity made a face before munching on it, “I really shouldn’t cook.”_

_“You think?” Oliver asked rhetorically, “I’m pretty sure even if I throw them on the street, even the dogs won’t eat it.”_

_Felicity stomped her right foot, “Enough.” She declared with a huff, “Why don’t you go and dump it on the street then, just to see?” She glared at him before walking away, “First, I cook for him and then he insults me.” She muttered as she walked away from him._

_Oliver groaned. He was just joking, “Felicity!” He called out, “I’m sorry!” He continued and Felicity turned around to glare at him one last time._

_Oliver laughed. Felicity was feisty and he loved that about her. But a small part of his brain supplied that he would also need to convince her. He made a mental note of getting her gift today._

_He sighed as he brought the box close before sniffing it. The pasta did smell delicious though. Whatever he might utter, he did appreciate the fact that Felicity cooked for him. She cared that much and he might just be messing with her, but he really loved the effort._

_Just not the food so much._

_Yeah, definitely not the food._

_…_

 Felicity eyed the food before she licked her lips. Taking a bite of the chicken and rice that _Oliver_ had cooked, she almost moaned while tasting it. She looked at him, “This is super yummy.” She commented and Oliver grinned, “I told you that I’ve gotten better.” Wiping his hands with a towel, he made his way towards Felicity before sitting right in front of her on the couch.

Oliver placed one leg on the couch in ‘L’ shape, his other leg touching the ground, “You like it?”

“Yeah,” Felicity hummed happily. She looked at Oliver before moving her arm that was holding the spoon filled with rice towards him, “Here.” She mumbled.

Oliver blinked, “What?”

Felicity talked to him in a way that strangely reminded him of a child, “You must be hungry too. You didn’t eat anything too.” Oliver stared at her for a second and then slowly he smiled, “I’m not hungry. You eat.”

“No.” Felicity was adamant, “If you won’t eat, I won’t eat.” Oliver sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose. To be very honest, he was hungry but Felicity as his priority at the moment. He didn’t really think about it that much while cooking because he wanted Felicity in bed as soon as possible. He’ll probably look for something after she goes off to sleep, “Felicity-“

“No!” Felicity shoved the spoon in his direction and Oliver sighed before taking a bite, “There. Happy?” He asked her and Felicity closed her eyes before nodding her head, “Happy.” She paused, “Now go get one more spoon.” She told him, “We’ll eat together.”

Wait, what?

“Felicity-“

“Go and get your spoon now.” Felicity declared, “We’ll eat together. If you won’t eat-“ Oliver raised his hands in surrender before getting up and going to the kitchen. He picked out a spoon and shot her a sarcastic grin, “There. Happy?”

“Very.” Felicity clapped her hands, “It’ll be like old times. You and I eating from the same plate.”

Oliver frowned before he smiled sadly, “Yeah. Like ..”His voice turned soft, “Like old times.”

He sat right in front of her and Felicity looked at him, “Just don’t eat that fast or I’ll-“

“Starve, I know.” He mumbled before moving his spoon on the plate. Scooping some rice in the spoon, he ate it. Now that he thought about it, he really was hungry, “Good boy.” Felicity patted his head and Oliver rolled his eyes.

“It would be better if you had that red wine. You never gave those two glasses you promised!”

“No, I didn’t.”

“You did! You broke a promise. A promise breaker is a shoemaker, you know?”

“I didn’t promise anything.”

“You are a liar.”

“I’m not.”

“Liar and shoemaker.”

“Felicity.”

…

Oliver rubbed his eyes as the fatigue kicked in. It was already four thirty am and he just wanted to doze off. He turned his head towards Felicity who still wasn’t tired and was babbling off stuff.

Oliver bit back a groan before getting off the couch. “Get up,” He told Felicity and the female in question blinked before getting up. Her feet were bare, she had long ago discarded off her sneakers and she had also taken off his jacket, “Let’s get you to bed.”

Felicity gasped, “No!” She crossed her arms, “I don’t want to sleep. I want to stay right here.” She pointed towards the couch, “We’ll sit right here and talk.”

“Felicity.” Oliver closed his eyes, “ _Please.”_

Felicity frowned, her mouth turning upside down before she sighed, her shoulders sagging, “Then you’ll promise you’ll stay with me?”

“Felicity, I can’t-“

“Please?” She repeated the same word that Oliver spoke, but unlike him it lack exasperation and was filled with expectation.

Expectation.

He never realized how they had stopped looking at each other with expectation.

A pang hit his heart and the realization that the two of them were too far gone.

But still, he murmured, “Yes,” He made a mental note to escape the bedroom whenever she falls asleep, “Now, can we go?”

Felicity nodded, “Yes.”

…

Felicity tried to catch a peek of the closet Oliver had entered from behind his shoulder but he was so tall that they weren’t able too.

“You’re too tall, move away.” Oliver didn’t reply her for the next two seconds before turning around, “I thought I told you to stay in the living room.”

“I was curious.” Felicity told him simply.

“Curiosity killed the cat, you know?”

“A cat has nine lives, you know?” Felicity countered, “I wanna see!” Oliver raised his hand, his mouth partng open almost as if to say something but then he just let out a breath before stepping away.

Felicity blinked as she tried to take in her surroundings. The walls of the room closet were filled with photographs. It was photographs of _them,_ Oliver, Conner and she .A couple of them were placed on the shelves too and slowly Felicity’s lips curled up. The top shelf had the photographs, some with frame, and some without. The shelf below it were full of gifts that they had placed in their house. It consisted of a beautiful snow globe, a music box, a set of cufflinks that she had gotten them on his birthday and so many things. The shelves below it were filled with clothes. Conner’s and hers.

Felicity’s head tilted sideways as she turned around. Walking forward, she didn’t really think before she kept her hand on his cheek, “You still have them.” She murmured and Oliver’s face softened, “I-“

Felicity smiled ruefully, “You still have them.” She repeated, “You still care.” She whispered, “What happened to us, Oliver?” She rubbed her thumb across his cheek and Oliver closed his eyes as if savouring the moment.

“I don’t know,” Oliver laughed dryly and a second later, he placed his hand on Felicity’s removing it ever so slightly, their hands still joined before letting it go, “I don’t know.” He wanted to say things, he wanted to clear things but he knew it wasn’t the right time and she wasn’t in the right mind.

He didn’t think she would care.

But then, why did his heart tell him something different? When she left, his heart and mind agreed and he hated her. His heart was broken and he hated her. But now, his mind said that she wasn’t good but his heart told him something else.

When did that happen?

Why was that happening?

A small part of his brain told him that he was still in love with her but he shrugged it off. He wasn’t. He couldn’t be.

“We were a good family. Not perfect, “Felicity laughed and Oliver bit his lip, “But we were great. You, me and Conner-“ She stopped.

“Conner.” She repeated and this time, tears filled her eyes. She tolted her head and Oliver felt his heart breaking as he saw her expression, “Conner.” She mumbled his name and Oliver moved his hands, trying to hold her but she took a step back. She closed her eyes causing a tear to escape from her left away, “He is gone.” She mumbled, “We can’t be a family anymore. My baby is dead.” She almost gasped, “Our baby is dead.” In a second, she ran past him and Oliver turned around only to see her retreating figure, “Felicity!”

Hastily, he grabbed the first pyjama he spotted. This was the main reason why he came here. He just wanted to get her some clothes but it seemed like the situation had turned out to be different.

Quite different.

…

Oliver’s first stop was their bedroom. _Old_ bedroom, he corrected himself and frowned when he didn’t find her there.

He sighed to himself as a location where she could be did come in his mind and he almost cursed himself for not looking there before. He walked towards the said room, making sure that he doesn’t make any sound that would make Felicity know of his presence.

He moved the door ever so slightly, hoping that it won’t creek as he peeked in.

She sat on the floor, her knees pulled up to her chest as she gazed straight away. It was similar to her position back in the closet of the Queen Mansion but there the situation was different and here it was completely opposite.

Oliver looked at her one more time before taking a deep breath. His own heart was breaking on the inside. She looked so _lost._ It made him reminisce their old times. She used to sit in his nursery then too and now also, things haven’t changed.

Oliver finally gathered the courage to talk to her. He pressed his hand against his face before making his away inside, “Hey.” Felicity stiffened at the sound of his voice before she lifted her head and looked at him. She scooted closer to the wall if possible. “Hey.”

He leaned his back against the wall, crouching down right beside her. “Somethings never change, huh?” He murmured to her, his hands dropping the pyjama that he had gotten on the floor.

Felicity sniffed before speaking “This was his nursery.” She stage whispered, “Do you remember whenever we used to come here, he used to crib a lot, because-“

“Because the walls didn’t have cartoons.” He grinned ever so slowly, “Yeah.” Conner was really observant. But Oliver guessed all babies were. The walls of this nursery were beige. A crib was right in the other corner, a small toy hanging above it for Conner to play with. Oliver remembered the time this room used to be full of toys, “And when we went back home, he used to cry when Thea held because he used to,” Oliver laughed a little as Felicity spoke, his eyes moistening, “Forget who she was. How can a baby forget someone so easily?”

“Well, it is possible.” Felicity sniffed, “Mom told me I used to cry when she used to get back from work because I didn’t remember who she was.”

“So, he was just like his mother then,” Oliver nudged her shoulder with his own and the word ‘was’ wasn’t lost to him. “He used to wake us up,” Felicity murmured, “Remember?” She looked at him and Oliver nodded. If Felicity was happy recalling his memories then they would do so.

“Thea or Tommy or anyone used to enter our room and place him on the bed and he would tap our cheeks with his tiny hands,” Felicity’s voice trailed off and her fingers twitched, her thumb rubbing slow circles on the first two fingers of her hand. “And he would make these noises-“

Oliver sighed before turning his face away from Felicity, his eyes filling with tears, “Yeah.” Felicity noticed this and spoke, ever so softly, “I’m sorry.”

Oliver pivoted his head towards her, “For what?”

“For not letting you grieve.” Felicity whispered, her gaze flickering towards her lap, “You lost him too, Oliver. And I was selfish enough to only think about myself and I know I’ve apologized before but it doesn’t make it-“ She was cut short as Oliver lifted her face, their eyes meeting, “There is no need for this, okay. I wanted to be there for you.”

“But I wasn’t there for you.” Felicity whispered, “You were there.” Oliver answered, “Always there.” Felicity let out a soft whimper before placing her head on his shoulder, her hand curling around his bicep and Oliver stiffened, “Why do you think God took Conner away?”

Oliver gazed at the wooden floor, the uneasiness going away, his shoulders relaxed as he answered her in a soft voice, “Sometimes, God needs angels. He loves them too much to give them away and so,” He moved his head towards her, his lips close to her blonde hair, “He takes them back.”

“So, our Conner was an angel?”

“Yes.”

“But he was supposed to be _our_ angel.”

Felicity’s hand tightened on his bicep and Oliver suddenly felt wetness on his cheek. He immediately wiped it with his left hand before sniffing lightly, “He is. Who says he isn’t?”

“I tried seeing him, you know.” Felicity started, “But then I couldn’t. No one would let me,” She closed her eyes.

“See him?” Oliver’s heart filled with dread, “What do you mean see him?” Did she try to do something? A sudden pang full of fear hit him, his breath seizing for a split second as he found himself reaching for the hand that was curled around his bicep, “What do you mean you tried seeing him?” Did she try to commit suicide?

“I just missed him,” Felicity murmured, “I missed you.” She said before Oliver could say anything further, “I love you.” She ended with a soft sigh and Oliver closed his eyes, leaning his head against the wall.

_I miss you._

_I love you._

_I tried seeing him, you know._

They say drunk words are sober thoughts but somehow, his heart couldn’t grip the reality and accept it. It was still rattling with the fear of losing her and then trying to accept her last sentences. 

It couldn’t be true.

His heart wasn’t ready to accept it.

Still within the silence in the room, a soft response of his did come out, ever so slowly, “I missed you too.”

But Felicity was already asleep, her breath even as she dozed away. A soft smile was on her face and Oliver reckoned that she was having a good dream.

Because reality was painful.

It was harsh and bitter.

Unlike dreams.

Which are happy and positive.

_And unreal._

…

Oliver covered Felicity with a blanket. He had carried her all the way from the nursery before placing her in their bedroom. She was still wearing her jeans and Oliver knew she would crib in the morning but he had no other alternative.

Leaning down, he took off her glasses ever so slowly before placing them on the side table. He allowed himself to gaze at her face for a second. The look on her face was soft and solemn as if she was away from the harsh realities of the world. Although, the tear tracks on her face told him another story. He sighed before brushing his hand on her cheek ever so slowly. Wiping away the stray moisture, he leaned down, his lips dangerously close to her forehead as he recalled her previous words.

Could it be true?

But then Felicity moved and Oliver snapped away. He moved back in an instant before turning around. Flicking off the light on the way, he turned around one last time casting her a long look.

_I tried seeing him, you know._

_I miss you._

_I love you._

He walked out of the room. He was read to head towards the guest bedroom when his eyes caught the sight of the closet door that he must have forgotten to close in haste. Oliver’s foot padded against the ground as he walked towards it. He was almost about to close the door but then he changed his mind and instead stepped inside it.

He made his way towards the shelves before reaching for the photographs, a particular one. He remembered a time when this photograph used to be his favourite. It was a picture of Felicity and Conner that he had snapped minutes after his birth. It was the first time they had handed him over to them and Felicity was all smiles.

_Was._

Then, he had everything.

Now, he had nothing.

He didn’t have Conner.

He didn’t have Felicity.

Now, all he had was memories.

Just memories.

Painful memories.

 


	14. Fools Of Nature

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Being in denial, never solved the problem. For anyone, anywhere.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! :) Just wanted to let you know, that I skipped the last chapter accidentally and posted this one instead of it. Hope everything makes sense now. I am so sorry :( 
> 
> The next one will be up soon, hope you like it :)

A soft hum ricocheted across the large bedroom as Felicity turned, her face landing on the plush pillow. Closing her eyes tightly, she opened her mouth, trying to get rid of her blonde hair that had landed in her mouth. She almost opened her right eye but then the light in the room felt too much and then she thought against it.

She lifted her face, her eyes still closed tightly and her head throbbing with pain. A sharp pain hit her head and she slammed it against the pillow. “Oh god, this is not going to be a good day for me.” mumbling to herself, she turned around, her back towards the bed, and her legs all over it. Groaning to herself, she pressed her right hand on her head, massaging it as she finally opened her eyes.

“Frack.”

She mumbled while massaging her head before her vision cleared and she blinked repeatedly, trying to analyse where she was.

A gasp escaped her lips as she lifted herself up on her elbows. She moved her head trying to figure out where exactly she was. She pivoted her head towards the right, looking for her glasses.

Wearing them, she blinked twice before she looked at the room and suddenly it was all clear.

“What the-“ she asked with her eyes wide open, taking in the view that she had in front of her eyes.

Nothing had changed really.

There was a plasma TV right in front of the bed. The ensuite bathroom right beside it. Towards the right, they were two closets that were once filled with their clothes. The aura of the room once felt homely. That was one of the reasons why she had chosen light shades of colour brown for this house. It was home and it needed to be felt like one.

It was their home.

Only now it wasn’t.

It was a house.

Just a house.

Felicity closed her eyes tightly as her head landed on the white mattress with a thump.

What in the world was she doing here?

…

“Oliver.” Felicity uttered the minute she entered the living room, finding the guy in question standing in the kitchen. In any other situation, she would have shouted.  She would have used her loud voice and God knows she wanted to but her head felt like it was being hammered by a carpenter and the loud voice wasn’t going to help much.

“Felicity,” Oliver greeted her, a small smile on his lips and Felicity almost felt like déjà vu. It was just like old times.  But it wasn’t, it wasn’t like old times. This was different.

Way different.

“What the fuck am I doing here?”

Well Oliver now knew how angry she was if she had replaced Frack with Fuck.

He knew this was going to happen.  “You got drunk last night,” he told her before turning around and pulling out a mug for her from the cupboard.

“I got what?”

Oliver turned to face her again. His eyes looked clouded and Felicity was sure that something was running through his brain. She crossed her arms, her head tilted towards right. “I got what?” she bit out again when she got no reaction from him.

Oliver sighed. Of course, she didn’t remember. How could she? She was totally whacked out of her mind, he was stupid enough to think that she would actually remember.

_He’s my husband._

_I never was with Ray._

_I tried seeing him, you know?_

_I love you._

_I missed you._

“Drunk” Oliver started, “Drugged” he corrected.  “The drink that you had at my house,” he paused, his voice trailing off, ” It was spiked.” Felicity’s eyes widened behind her glasses, “Spiked?” her voice rose and she cringed for a second, “You spiked my drink! How low can you stoop?”

Oliver eyebrows rose, “I didn’t spike it!” He defended himself and Felicity scoffed, “Yeah right. Like I am supposed to believe that,” she rolled her eyes. “As if the leftover thing wasn’t enough now you want to flaunt it, right? That you have moved on and I’m still stuck in the past.” she bit out.

It hurt her saying it out loud because the truth is that she was stuck in the past.

Despite all the assurances of moving on, despite the sessions, despite getting a dose of reality everytime she saw Oliver, a part of her was still stuck in here. She was making progress but that doesn’t mean that she had gotten over it. It still hurt and she didn’t know whether she would ever get over it and the fact that that Oliver had moved on hurt her even more. Of course, they still loved their son. Of course, they felt melancholy and grief over it but Oliver somehow had _gotten used to_ the pain while Felicity was still going through the initial stages. He had a girlfriend, a support system from his family and Felicity did too but it didn’t make up for a lost son and a lost husband. He left her, he has a life and he has moved on but she couldn’t move on. She wasn’t really over it and the realization was painful.

It hurt more than she thought it would.

“Do you seriously think that low of me?” Oliver gritted out through his clenched teeth, “Don’t you know me at all?”

“That’s the thing Oliver,” Felicity turned her face away, “I never knew you at all.”

And she didn’t because the Oliver she fell in love with was different. It never even occurred to her that he would ever give up on her and their relationship but he did. She knew she wasn’t perfect and she had made mistakes too but she was still there ready to owe them and move forward but not him. He had let go. He didn’t stand by her. He walked out on her. For such a long time she believed that it was her fault, that she didn’t deserve him or Conner and that it was her fault that they both were gone. But now she knew, she knew that it wasn’t her fault. Whatever, whatever mistakes she made in her life, she didn’t deserve Oliver leaving her.

Oliver flinched visibly as the statement escaped her lips. His eyebrows furrowed as he searched for words to come out of his mouth. How could Felicity think of him this way and more importantly why did he care.

_Why did he care about her opinion?_

“I didn’t do it,” he finally spoke breaking the silence and Felicity turned to face him. Oliver’s face softened, “It was a mistake. That bottle belonged to a customer at the club who had it spiked. I didn’t know it. I didn’t do it. _Trust me.”_

His blue eyes were shining with sincerity and Felicity saw a glimpse of her old Oliver. “I do, I do trust you on this,” she bit her lip. She might have been angry but despite everything she trusted him.

Knowing their history, she didn’t know _why._ He was always there for her when they were together and she never doubted that. But then things happened and her perceptions changed.

_Or maybe they hadn’t._

Maybe she was still in denial.

But she knew it in her heart that he was speaking the truth.

He was.

“How come we landed up here?” she mumbled, her voice turning soft and Oliver bit his lip before passing the coffee mug to her, “I don-“

“You have headache right now” Oliver cut her off. A small part of him was grateful for that otherwise she would have been screaming at him by now.  “Drink this and then also, if the headache doesn’t go away in half an hour, you know where the aspirin is.”

Felicity looked at him before taking the mug, “How did we end up here?” Oliver then shoved a plate in her direction that had two butter toasts on it.

“You weren’t telling where your house is.”

“Really?” Felicity’s eyebrows rose up, “Yup.” Oliver declared before sighing, “Every time the response was that I live in a house, on a street.” Oliver grinned lightly.

“You shouldn’t have.”

“I know.” He paused, “But I had no other option.”

“You should-“Oliver could see her expression, her gaze lingering at the floor and he spoke before he could think. He needed to distract her, “You did a say a lot of things last night though.”

This grabbed her attention and Oliver smiled a little. Felicity frowned as if trying to recall last night but it was all blank. “Like what?”

_You said you loved me._

_That you missed me._

_That you almost tried committing suicide._

_That you never were with Ray._

Last night after listening to Felicity’s drunken confessions, Oliver couldn’t bring himself to sleep. Instead, his mind ran a thousand miles playing the past events in his mind. He once thought about calling Laurel, Tommy or anyone but then decided against it because he thought that would be betraying Felicity.

Did she really try to commit suicide?

His heart had rattled with fear just at the thought of it. He had lost his son, his dad- did Felicity really reached that stage where he could have lost her too?

He made a mental note to look into it further and had tried not to think about it because the thought itself gave him chills.

Despite everything, he wasn’t ready to lose her.

He had in one sense, but even then he knew that she was alive, living somewhere but living.

He couldn’t lose her.

He was sure he would lose himself then.

He also found himself thinking about her I love you. He won’t admit it to himself but he would have said it back had he not given it a thought.

He missed her despite everything there was a piece of his heart that she still owned

Or maybe she still owned his heart completely.

Last night’s admission did help him realize that.

Helped him in remembering the old her, his Felicity.

Their memories.

But did he love her?

His heart had started saying something different after a long while but he refused to accept it. No matter how he feels he knows she didn’t love him because if she did the she wouldn’t have cheated.

Which brought him to the ‘I never was with Ray’ part.

That was wrong.

He knew it in his heart, he knew they were together. He just knew it.

 

“You hugged a guy thinking it was Dumbledore.” Oliver told her and Felicity’s jaw dropped open, “No way!”

“Uhuh” Oliver nodded, “You kept saying to him you’re alive and you also, wanted to call Sam and Dean..?” he fumbled with the words and Felicity blinked, “I need to stop watching TV.”

Oliver chuckled as she walked towards the couch, “So is this your place?” she sat on the couch, a sense of longing in her tone. “Like you come here often? With Laurel?” she uttered before she could stop herself biting her cheek with embarrassment.

“Laurel has never been here.” Oliver declared, “The others have but they don’t stay.” Felicity looked at him with a questioning gaze and knew she wanted to know why but he didn’t answer.

Felicity didn’t say anything either.

“I slept in jeans.” Felicity groaned as she sat on the couch “Now my insides are all sweaty.”

Oliver crossed his arms as he leaned against the slab, his right brow risen as he grinned recalling her statement. He was about to open his mouth but Felicity looked up the last second.

“Don’t.  Just don’t.”

Oliver let out a breathy laugh.

….

Felicity gripped the edge of the door as she peaked in the nursery that once belonged to her son. Her eyes had moistened but she wasn’t bawling which was a good sign considering her recent track record with crying.

“He shouldn’t have brought me here,” Felicity mumbled to herself as she entered the room. To be honest, she had wanted to see the nursery and maybe even think about Conner since the day she landed in Starling City. Even though she knew that the wounds in her heart are still not healed and it might not heal ever but she now knew how to live with that. Or at least she tried.  The pain of losing Connor will always be there. But right now it wasn’t Conner’s memories that were hurting her at this point, it was theirs.

Oliver’s.

Which is why, she didn’t really want to stay in this house.

She might be at peace with Conner but she wasn’t at peace with Oliver. 

“I knew that you would come here,” Oliver murmured and Felicity turned around. She looked at him for a second before her gaze flickered back to the room. Since the time Felicity came back everything that was related to her late son reminded her of Oliver and each time she found herself getting hit with the realization that he was gone and she comes one step closer to embracing reality.

Back in Central City, she usually ignored the feeling. The emptiness. She usually embraced the void that used to surface whenever she remembered about Oliver’s birthday, or Connor’s or their wedding anniversary but in Starling, each day she found herself face to face with what she had lost. And she was trying her best to conquer this battle with this void, this emptiness, her loneliness.

But even after everything she couldn’t help herself but think about where did they stand..? Where did Oliver and Felicity stand now?

“You know, Felicity,” Oliver started and she turned her head towards him, “You told me you were stuck in the past. The truth is, we all are,” he murmured softly, “We still haven’t let go of it.”

But how could they have? The question lingered on their lips. For moving on you need support, they needed each other but life had something else in store for them.

There were a different things she wanted to say but she couldn’t.

“The next time you bring me here without my permission, I would feed all of your wealth to the dolphins.” Felicity stated firmly before walking past him and Oliver sighed while moving sideways. His peripheral vision caught her retreating figure and he felt a pang in his chest on seeing her cold behaviour.

He sighed to himself before making an about turn and following her.

….

Felicity leaned against the elevator wall and Oliver looked at her, millions of question in his head but he shook his head before fixating his gaze at the door waiting for it to open any moment.

It was weird. Almost a month back, when the two of them had their first encounter in the elevator itself at QC, Oliver remembered glaring at her and even she rolled her eyes at him. But now, they weren’t even seeing each other, but something had vanished.

Of course, they didn’t like the other person. They still _hated_ each other but something had changed.

Oliver wasn’t sure what though.

The elevator dinged and the second it opened, Oliver’s eyes widened and Felicity cringed as the flashes of the camera hit her. It didn’t help the fact that her headache had just gotten away and now, the flashes were hitting her eyes. She brought a hand in front of her face before closing her eyes as the throbbing in her head returned and Oliver in a second had pressed the button to close the lift.

“Media?” Oliver muttered, “Who the hell informed them?” Felicity closed her eyes as she leaned her head against the wall, “Press, really?” she said under her breath, “They are like dogs.”

The two reached back to their floor and Oliver stepped out of the lift. Felicity raised her eyebrows and Oliver moved his head forward, “It’s the house or the media.”

Felicity huffed before narrowing her eyes at him. She forced a sarcastic grin, “Fine.”

…

**April 2009**

_“You remember how I told you that I was fine with the reporters following us across the town?” Felicity looked up at Oliver who hummed in reply._

_“I think I was lying.” She bit her lip, her gaze flickering towards the tree that she was pretty sure was a hiding spot for one of the paps, “I always think that they are people following us.”_

_“Because they are.” Oliver said nonchalantly and Felicity gaped at him before shoving his arm, “How can you be this calm?”_

_Oliver rubbed his arm, “Why do you always hit me?” Felicity glared at him and Oliver sighed, “Fine. I keep forgetting that you are new to this. I-I’ve grown up with these things happening to me so I’m used to it. I don’t like it, but I can’t help it.”_

_“You should at least try,” Felicity crossed her arms across her chest as the two of them stopped. They were in park. It was a beautiful night with the moonlight falling on all the trees. Felicity could see the dew drops on the leaves that were on the verge of falling. It was about to rain and that is what made Felicity drag Oliver here. She loved the smell of wet mud and the rain was something that she always had found beautiful. So, here she was with Oliver._

_But some sneaky people were ruining their fun._

_“Your life isn’t a reality television show, Oliver.” She stated firmly and Oliver bit his lip before nodding, “You’re right. I’ll talk to dad about it.”_

_He had always loved the limelight, the spotlight. But now, he preferred the cosy and sweet moments he had with Felicity and he wanted it to be private unlike the way his past self would have wanted._

_Things really had changed._

_“Good.” Felicity smiled before hooking her arm with Oliver’s, “Or maybe I should talk to them. Your dad loves me anyway.”_

_“You’re so cocky.”_

_“What? It’s the truth.” Felicity grinned, “Hell his mother likes me. You’re just jealous because they love me more.”_

_“I’m not.”_

_“You are.” Oliver’s face was hovering near her, a smile full of amusement on his lips and Felicity grinned back. He leaned forward trying to steal a kiss when the camera flashed causing Felicity and Oliver to pull away with a groan._

_Oliver turned towards the man who had his camera clenched in his hand. He began to strive forward but the man started backing away before gaining speed and running away. He seemed scared._

_Felicity pulled his hand back and Oliver’s gaze was still fixed in the direction in which the guy had ran away, “Hey.” Felicity tilted his face towards herself, “Don’t fight them on your own.”_

_“Why?” Oliver frowned, “I should teach them a lesson-“_

_“You’ll talk to your dad.” Felicity told him and Oliver huffed. The latter pulled his arm and his eyebrows rose, “What are you doing?”_

_Her gaze flickered around to the people in the park before fixating itself on Oliver. She pulled his arm and he followed her reluctantly, the two of them going towards the area under a tree that was in one corner. It was pretty dark and remote and in normal situations, Felicity would have felt a bit scared._

_But she wasn’t._

_She pulled Oliver towards himself and his eyes widened, “What are you doing?”_

_“Spending some private time with my boyfriend.” Felicity shrugged as she wrapped her arms around his neck and bringing her lips dangerously close to his. Oliver felt warm breath on his lips and he almost groaned as Felicity pulled away, “What?”_

_“Nothing.” Felicity just wiggled her eyebrows suggestively and Oliver groaned before he pulled her arms that were around him and slammed her against the tree._

_His mouth covered hers and Felicity almost moaned, her hands travelling underneath his t-shirt, his muscles clenching as she did so. Her other hand pressed his shoulder tightly as she bit his lip before she soothed the pain with her tongue and Oliver groaned, his mouth travelling towards the neck and Felicity tilted it sideways, her hands clenching. His one hand rested against the tree which he slowly shifted towards the back of her head while the other was on her waist and gradually, his hold loosened causing Felicity to frown. “What?” She asked, her lips slightly swollen._

_“Don’t start something you wouldn’t finish.”_

_Felicity blinked before realizing where her hand was and she blushed before pulling away. “Sorry. I didn’t do it on purpose. I mean, I want it but not here. Park is definitely not the place for it. It’s wet and soft but still not good. I mean wet and soft it is good-not like that! Definitely not like that,” Felicity uttered, “I just imagined this in my bedroom or yours-just in a,” Felicity bit her lip, “Bedroom.”_

_Felicity felt like maybe she shouldn’t talk._

_Maybe Oliver wasn’t ready and she was just making him nervous-_

_Oliver kissed her again._

_Okay, so maybe he was ready._

_Not for that!_

_Not in the park._

_In a house._

_Definitely in a house._

_…_

The two entered the house and Oliver immediately reached for the phone calling the guard asking him to make sure no one comes up and to get everyone out. He then went to check hi phone which he has switched off last night after sending a message to Thea and Laurel that he was safe and at his old house. He knew they were minimal chances of Thea visiting due to it being Valentine’s Day and all and Laurel had never visited this place before. She knew where it was and how much it meant to him. He had never asked her to come here and she never questioned him either.

Today was Valentine’s Day and he vividly remembered the promises he had made to his mother and Laurel but he needed some time alone. To rest and to think about last night. He would probably call John later on because he needed his insight. But right now, he needed a break. His phone had been switched off and he knew it was pretty careless but he needed a break and a good sleep.

The sound of the television snapped him out of his reverie and Felicity was sitting on the couch, his tablet in her hand. “Hey, that’s my tablet,” he chided her.

Felicity glared at him but didn’t reply back. Oliver sighed before going to his bedroom and getting her an aspirin. Returning to the living room the next second, he placed one of the table along with a glass of water. Felicity eyed it warily before taking it and Oliver didn’t say anything while going back to the kitchen to keep the glass in the sink.

His ears perked up at the sound of news reporter.

 _“Well, it seems like history is repeating itself. Oliver Queen was spotted with his ex-wife Felicity Smoak. Maybe the two of them were spending some quality time together on Valentine’s Day. It’s been almost three years since the Starling City ‘It’ couple has broken up and it seems like they are finding their way back to each other._ “

The lady on the screen smiled brightly, a picture of Oliver and Felicity popping up on the screen. It was a picture that dated a few years back. Felicity was grinning in it, her hand in Oliver’s who was looking at her, his eyes full of love. It was a pretty subtle moment and the timing was pretty impeccable.

A second later, another photo popped up on the screen. This was yesterday’s, Felicity’s hand was in Oliver’s. And this picture she was the one who was looking up at him kinda similar to the way he was in the previous picture.

 _“However, there is still one heart that is broken at the knowledge of our favourite couple uniting.”_ A picture of Laurel popped up on the screen and Oliver groaned, “ _Laurel Lance had reportedly been dating Oliver Queen since January 2014.”_ She paused for dramatic effect and that was all it took for Felicity to switch off the television.

She turned her head towards her ex-husband, “Oliver!” She glared at him, “This is all your fault!”

“My fault! You got drugged!” Oliver pointed out.

“After you gave me that drink in the first place,” Felicity bit out.

“It wasn’t my intention. And I’m sorry I wasn’t able to keep an eye out at the reporters because I was busy looking out for you.”

“Yeah but-frack, this is such a mess.” Felicity started, “People believe we are together again! Do you even realize how bad could this be, Oliver? Like together, together which we are not. They have misunderstood the entire thing. I mean you and I can’t even stand each other. What if they ask us to give an interview?” She frowned, “We won’t be able to. And what if they ask your family? Oh my god! Your family, Oliver! They will slaughter me. Well, figuratively of course.” She tilted her head, “Or maybe not. I do co-own the company after all-“

“Felicity,” Oliver stopped her short, “Calm down.” She took a deep breath, “I’m handling this.” Oliver raised one finger in the air and placed his mobile against his ear. His voicemail was full of messages and a list of missed calls were displayed on his screen. He was pretty sure that his entire family knew.

Felicity stood up. She hugged the tablet to her chest before walking towards the balcony and stood near the door. She could see reporters standing outside and her lips turned upside down, “They are like animals.”

“I talked to Reece,” Oliver told her and Felicity shot him a questioning gaze, “He is from the PR department. They are sending people here” he told her, “I don’t know how they spotted us last night.”

Silence ensued for a split second before, “Oliver?”

“Yeah?”

“Did..did something happen last night?” Felicity bit her lip as she looked at him and Oliver shook his head, “No. Nothing happened last night.”

_Well, except you dropping some eye opening facts last night._

“Good.” Felicity nodded her head. She slid her finger across the tablet, “You still don’t put a passcode on them?” She frowned and Oliver shook his head, “You know I don’t use them, Felicity.” Oliver’s gaze was on his phone as he talked to her. She shrugged before getting comfortable on the couch.

“What are you doing?”

“Trying to look into a few news agencies.”

Oliver huffed a chuckle before vacating the living room.

_Hacking is such an angry word, Oliver._

…

“Yes John, “Oliver nodded his head while talking to him, “She is safe and no, she didn’t do anything stupid,” he continued, “Now would you please see that the crowd goes away? And yes, do meet me after that. We need to talk.” Oliver hung up his cell before dialling another number.

“Hey Laurel,” he started as he leaned against the window in his room, “Yeah, I’m so sorry.” He pressed the bridge of his nose with his left hand, “I know, it was reckless.” He muttered out the last part.

_“What about the news, Ollie? Were you really with her?”_

“Yeah, about that.” Oliver didn’t know where to begin from, “It’s long story. I’ll explain it to you when I reach home, okay?”

He heard her sigh on the other end, _“I just-“There_ was a brief pause, _“I don’t know why, I feel insecure when she is around. I know I should talk to you about this in person but I just-I just don’t want to lose you. I love you, Oliver.”_

Oliver bit his lip as he contemplated a reply, “I know how this looks, okay? But trust me, nothing is the way what the media makes it out to be.” He paused when he heard her speaking, “Thank you.” He said a second later, “I love you Laurel.”

He turned around, wanting to tell Felicity that the situation had been handled only to find her standing on the threshold of the bed. “I just-“ Felicity stuttered under his gaze. Her hands moved showing him her phone, “I needed a charger.” She bit out, her voice suddenly small and a second later, realization dawned on Oliver. “Sorry.”

“Feli-“

Felicity turned around and walked away.

Oliver’s finger twitched as he pressed his lips together. His hand rose as if he wanted to say something but Felicity had already fled. This was all that he had wanted since the beginning. To show her that without her he was happy. That her screwing with Ray had paved a happy path for him and he wasn’t a lovesick fool anymore.

Now he had.

Then why the hell he wasn’t feeling satisfied?

…

Felicity moved her finger across the tablet, trying to distract herself. She knew that Oliver was with Laurel so it shouldn’t hurt that much. Well, it shouldn’t hurt at all but Felicity figured out that the only reason she was hurting because he was a link to Conner and she was sad about losing that.

But the pain was intense. Being a genius, it didn’t take her heart and mind to put two and two together but she still was in denial. She didn’t have feelings for Oliver.

She didn’t.

The doorbell rung and Felicity looked towards the bedroom, almost expecting Oliver to walk in any moment but when he didn’t, she made her way towards the door and opened it.

“Oliver, your neighbour shouted at me-“Thea tilted her head as she stared at Felicity. Tommy and Roy (at least that was the name that Felicity remembered) were standing behind it. “You’re not Oliver” Thea uttered and Felicity didn’t say a word as she moved a little to the side allowing them to enter inside.

“What in the world are you doing here?” Tommy’s voice was harsh and Felicity got comfortable on the couch. She knew that this would be their reaction and at this point she might as well get comfortable to listen to the things they have to say about her.

 “Yeah, about that.” Felicity grinned sardonically, “Ask your best friend.” She gritted out the next moment.

“Why can’t you just leave my brother alone?” Thea narrowed her eyes at her, “Haven’t you done enough? Slee-“

“Whose there?” Oliver interrupted them and the four occupants of the room pivoted their heads in his direction, “Oh thank god.” Felicity heard Thea muttered before she reached forward and hugged Oliver. She pulled away and then shoved his chest, “Where were you? I was worried.”

“I messaged!”

“Still!” She exclaimed before whipping her head towards Felicity, “And what is _she_ doing here?”

“Geez, Thea. So much of love,” Felicity mumbled under her breath.

“It’s a long story,” Oliver shrugged it off, “I’ll explain it you guys later today.” He looked around, “Reece and John?”

“Downstairs.” Tommy informed him, “John is getting rid of the crowd. He has a whole team down there and Reece told us to fetch you. You both are having a press conference.”

“Press conference?”

“Yup,” said Thea “To get rid of the rumours. Mom, Laurel and Sara will meet us there.”

“Isn’t this at a short notice?”

“That’s the only solution.” Tommy told Felicity and she frowned, “But I’m not dressed for it.”

Thea shot her an exasperated look, “I don’t think people are going to notice your dressing style, Smoak.”

Felicity’s eyebrows furrowed as she heard the last word, “Actually, statistics tells us that ninety pe-“

Tommy sighed, “We’ll get your clothes on our way.”

“Now come on!” Thea moved behind Oliver and then shoved his shoulders, “We need to get going.” She looked at Felicity the next moment, “You too.” She paused, “Or do you want to delay this further? Want a place back into my brother’s life?”

Felicity tilted her head sideways, “I’ll skip.”

Thea rolled her eyes, “Now come on!” Tommy was about to open his mouth to say something but he shrugged it off the last minute. Felicity watched Oliver, Thea and Tommy leave before she realized a person was standing right next to her, “So, you wanna say anything too Roy?”

Roy gulped, “Nope.” He stuffed his hands in his jean pockets, “I don’t know you so I can’t judge you.”

“That’s a great opinion you have there.”

“Well, I’ve been judged my entire life so I know how it feels like.” Felicity was about to say something but before she could utter the words, Thea came in through the open door. She looked at the two of them before pulling Roy’s arm, “Come on, let’s go Roy.” She looked at her boyfriend and Felicity rolled her eyes.

“Or she would start ranting about how she lost her son and husband.”

Felicity froze. For a second she felt like someone sucked out blood from her entire body.

A pang hit her chest and her eyes begin to burn. Thea’s face got clouded with regret for a split second on seeing her reaction. Her mouth was slightly parted, her eyes glossy and for a moment Thea felt like the biggest bitch on this planet. The look of disappointment on Roy’s face didn’t help much either. A second later, the look vanished and she glared at Felicity coldly before turning around and walking away, Roy in tow. She did stop midway though when she saw her brother who glared at her before walking past him.

Felicity bit her lip.

_Or she would start ranting about how she lost her son and husband._

Just when she thought she was accepting reality.

Lines appeared on her forehead, her lower lip wobbling. She was dangerously close to crying. But then she saw Oliver standing in the doorway, a frown on his forehead and was that regret? She didn’t know what to think.

She mustered up the courage she had as she started speaking, “I was just…” She pointed towards her bare feet. She had taken off her shoes a little while after they entered the house again. “Looking for my shoes.” She mumbled, her voice small as she bent down, moving her hands just to distract herself and him, so that she won’t cry in front of him.

The tears did flow then and she wiped it with her hand.

“Felici-“

“Yeah, I can’t find them.” Felicity looked around only to find her sneakers lying haphazardly a few metres away. “There they are.” She picked them up before moving up.

Her face was red, her cheeks were wet and Oliver felt his heart break at the sight of it, “Felicity, Thea-“

“Has grown up.” Felicity completed the sentence, trying to muster a smile but failing miserably. At this point, she should have replied back harshly but she felt weak and she wanted to just cry. Somethings hurt you really bad. “Yeah, you would be proud of her.”

Oliver flinched. Was he any better than Thea? He called her a leftover and Thea said this thing to her.

Was this the way she reacted when he called her so?

He told himself she deserved it.

But did she really?

He made himself believe that she did.

But this? What Thea said was absolutely ridiculous. Bringing up Conner was way out of line. “We should go.” Felicity mumbled, looking at her reflection on the hardwood floor as she ruffled her hair lightly. Her nose was red and her voice was wavering, “Felicity, can you-“

“We should go.” Felicity rubbed her hands on her jeans as she started to move past him.

Oliver needed to talk to her so he said what came to his mind in a second, “What about the charger?”

“I’m sorry?”

“You needed to charge your phone, right? Did you find it?”

“Actually,” Felicity sniffed, “I didn’t.” She told him, “You can keep your phone here-“

“No thank you, Oliver.” Felicity started, “It’s not like I have people in Starling who are worried about me, right? It’ll be fine.” She tried to give him a smile before walking out.

And suddenly, Oliver felt a lot worse than before.

…

**May 2009**

_Oliver felt like a douchebag. It was his fault anyway. He shouldn’t have left her alone. He knew how fundraisers usually were, well the people present there usually were yet he left her alone there._

_He opened the door to her apartment and placed the key back in his pocket. It was something that Felicity had given him a little while after they had become friends. But recently, she gave him a keychain too for it, with a heart on it and Oliver knew what it meant and it made him love her more._

_She could be so adorable some times._

_Okay, all the time._

_He entered her bedroom only to find her sitting on the bed in one corner. Doctor Who was playing on the television and he knew that this was her comfort show. He forgot how many times she had gushed about Rose and Doctor Who. And then there was her epic babbling that who she liked better between Matt Smith and David Tennant._

_Oliver personally like Matt Smith though. Yes, Felicity had made him watch the entire series and he would admit that he enjoyed every bit of it. Sometimes, when he found the episode boring he would just sit there and watch Felicity repeat the lines, her voice trying to match up the voice of the actors and laugh._

_But now, tears were dripping down her cheeks and Oliver bit his lip, his expression getting clouded._

_He didn’t like seeing her cry._

_She made him happy. She was the part of his life that he looked forward too. She made everyone happy. She didn’t deserve pain. She did not._

_“Felicity?”_

_The girl in question turned her head towards him and Oliver tilted his head sideways as he sighed watching her cry. Felicity wiped her tears almost instantly, “Oliver.” She tried to grin, “I was just watching the Doomsday part,” She waved her hand in the air, “You know how it gets to me, right?” She looked really vulnerable right now. Her smile was fake, her lower lip wobbling._

_“Felicity.” Oliver sighed before taking off his shoes and coming to sit right beside her, “I heard.”_

_“What?” Felicity tried to shrug it off, “That I made a fool of myself out there? Don’t worry. I’m pretty sure people would forget about it by tomorrow.” She grinned, or tried to, her hands fisting on the hem of her batman t-shirt, “It’s fine.”_

_“You can talk to me, you know that right?” Oliver pressed his hand on her shoulder and a tear dripped down Felicity’s cheek, “They just-they just started talking about how I was dating Oliver Queen and then the conversation suddenly shifted towards the fact that I didn’t have a dad.” She whispered, “They called me his leftover Oliver and how despite of everything, I had managed a position in a big company only because I slept with the CEO’s son.”_

_“You know,” Felicity wiped her tears with the back of her hand and Oliver leaned closer to her, “People called us that. His leftovers. It’s like he made the mistake and we paying for it-I don’t understand. Why are people so mean, Oliver?” She whimpered, “Why?” She uttered before she fell into his arms and Oliver hugged her tightly, his hands running through her blonde locks._

_Felicity whimpered, pressing her cheek on his shoulder. Oliver whispered soothing words and this calmed her down a little. She pulled away a minute later and Oliver cupped her cheek, “Sometimes,” Oliver started, his thumb wiping off the tear tracks on her cheeks, “The world is not as innocent and pure as you are, Felicity. It’s not.” He told her softly and Felicity leaned her head against his palm, “People say. They talk bullshit but you don’t let them faze you. You have reached here because you have that strength. Don’t let some high class bitch ruin your life._ _“_

_He smiled, “These tears are really precious. Don’t waste them for anyone, okay?” Felicity sniffed but nodded against his hand before Oliver pressed a kiss against her forehead causing Felicity’s eyes to close._

_There was a pregnant pause before, “Dad kicked them out.”_

_“What?”_

_“He kicked those ladies out of the fundraiser and I might have started shouting at them, telling them that I am dating you and it’s because I love you.”_

_“You what?”_

_“Yeah,” Oliver grinned lopsidedly, “I might have confessed that in front of everyone? Also, I think the papers would definitely publish them.” He uttered, “But you don’t like publicity and I still don’t know your response. This is bad-“_

_Felicity flung herself at her, hugging him tightly. She couldn’t stop grinning as she pressed her cheek against his shoulder. She could feel tears collect in her eyes and some of them might have escape but this was different._

_She was happy._

_“What? You’re crying again? I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. You know you don’t need to cry. God, please don’t cry.”_

_Felicity pulled away the next second and hit his shoulder with her right hand, “You dork! I love you too!” She said and Oliver’s eyes brightened, “You do?”_

_“Yes!” She smiled happily before hugging him away and this time she felt Oliver wrap his arms tightly around her, “Uh, Felicity.”_

_Felicity’s head was still on his shoulder, “Yes?”_

_“This is the part where we kiss.”_

_“Later.” Felicity didn’t want to let go of him now, “Loads of kissing and sexy times.” She mumbled again, snuggling up to him, “Especially since you’re wearing your sexy suspenders.”_

_“I thought you didn’t notice.”_

_“Oh, I noticed. I notice everything.”_

_She felt Oliver chuckle and then press a kiss on her hair._

_She might not have a father._

_But she had her world right here._

…

Felicity sat on the stairs that were behind the hall where the press conference was taking place.  She was glad that she chose to wear jeans when she stopped by at her house earlier today.

The minute they stepped out of the car, Oliver and Felicity parted ways. Oliver was with his family and she was sitting here all alone.

She wanted to cry.

She did.

Frankly, her mood did brighten up in the car when John had opened up the front door for her asking her to grab the shot gun. Felicity agreed and John told her how she once told him she was his friend, so she would sit on the shotgun and hence, it would always be reserved for her.

But now, she was out here all alone and she couldn’t help but recall Thea’s words.

 _Or she would start ranting about how she lost her son and husband_.

She voiced what was real though, didn’t she?

She did lose her son.

And her husband.

Honestly, what was she even doing here in Starling?

Oh yeah, to fulfil her father’s last wish.

Whom she lost as well.

Felicity sniffed and leaned her head down. She was sure her face was red and one tear leaked out from the corner of her eye. She was about to wipe it when a white handkerchief was shoved in front of her face and she frowned before turning towards the person who was offering it.

The person’s blue eyes were filled with curiosity and Felicity could smell his cologne on the handkerchief that probably he had gotten out of his suit jacket that he looked really good in. He moved the hand further, his black hair moving accordingly and when Felicity didn’t accept it, he shoved it back in his jacket before standing up, “I am guessing that’s a no then.”

Felicity frowned for a second before calling out, “Yes.” She didn’t even know why she said yes. Maybe she just needed a companion at this point. The guy laughed a little, before giving the handkerchief to her and she sniffed lightly, “Thank you.”

“So?”

“So?” Felicity echoed.

“I see a girl crying on a staircase, _alone._ So, I was wondering how you got here?”

“Just because you offered me a handkerchief doesn’t mean I’ll talk to you about my life. This is not Forrest Gump.”

“Funny, I always believed that life is box full of chocolates. Maybe you got stuck with the nutty one, huh?”

“I’m allergic to peanuts.” Felicity wiped the tear tracks and the guy frowned, “Really? That’s a shame. That means you’ve never had peanut butter sandwiches.”

Felicity nodded, “I did once. Then I went into anaphylactic shock and discovered I was allergic to them,” She smiled softly and the guy laughed. Felicity sniffed a second later and the guy frowned, “You want to talk?”

“No.” Felicity bit out, “Why would I talk to you about my life? Why are so keen on knowing about it anyway? Like my life wasn’t already a mess. My husband left me and now people think we’re together, isn’t that twisted?” Felicity frowned, “It’s like God is planning things against me. Next thing we know, that Oliver and I are engaged. Oh my god! I said it. What if I jinxed it? Do you think I jinxed it? Because statistics tells us that jinx do come true like thirty seven percent of the time and what if I fall into them? My luck has already ditched me. Let’s face it, even my bad luck is bad.”

The guy laughed loudly and Felicity furrowed her eyebrows, “What is so funny, Mister?” Her head tilted sideways, the end of her pony tail landing on her shoulder.

“Nothing,” He raised his arms in surrender, “You’re just...”

“Just what?” Felicity frowned, “Screwed. Alone.” She counted on her fingers and then her lips curled upside down, “I’m alone.” She murmured as she looked at the guy for a plausible explanation. His gaze lowered and then his expression changed, “How about we change that?”

“Change what?”

“Here.” He said before taking out a card and giving it to her. Felicity didn’t see it but she was sure it was a visiting card, “I’m alone too. Recently shifted here. So, I could use some help.”

“Are you asking me out on a date? Because let me tell you-“She raised a finger and then pointed it towards herself, “I don’t date. My track record isn’t good at all. The last guy I dated is now my ex-husband, the guy before that my said ex-husband scared him off and the guy way before that  ditched me because I refused to hack into the government when he asked me to.” She sighed, “I don’t date.”

“It’s a not a date.” He raised his hands in surrender, “I just want my handkerchief back.” He looked at the cloth that Felicity had been clenching in her hands, “Oh. _Oh.”_ Felicity mumbled, “Of course.”

She squinted her eyes at the card and gasped, “You’re a reporter.” Her gaze turned vehement, “Is that why you were asking for my life story?” She shoved him and the guy frowned, “I know. I’m sorry. My boss sent me here to grab some information about the case.”

“If you tell your boss about anything I will ruin your career,” She narrowed her eyes at him. She threw the card at him and then the handkerchief, “You guys just know how to play with emotions, don’t you?”

He got up a second later, his hands reaching for the card and the cloth lying on the ground. Felicity was still glaring at him, “I am telling you, I would ruin your career if anything I said would get published in the papers. My life is already a mess, I don’t need people like you in my life.”

“I know,” He sighed, “My intention was never to get the story, Ms. Smoak.” He paused, “You actually looked like you needed someone. I never would have taken advantage of you. I’ve been in that position and it doesn’t feel good,”

Felicity’s gaze softened but she didn’t say anything, “I just wanted to help. I won’t tell my boss anything, not that you’ve actually told me loads but no.” Felicity looked at the ground and she felt him keeping the card right beside her, “I don’t blame you for not trusting me.” He bit his lip, “Just in case, you change your mind Ms. Smoak. You really look like you need a friend,”

He walked away and Felicity frowned, crossing her arms. “What does he know about friendship anyway? He just came here for business.“ Still Felicity found herself reaching for the card.

_Ed Raymond._

_Senior News Reporter_

_BBC News_

She contemplated whether she should throw the card away or not but she went with the latter, figuring that if she would have to ruin his career, she would need some information.

“Felicity.”

She turned herself, her elbow resting on the step that was above as she looked at Oliver. His face resembled what hers for hours ago. “I just came here to call you,” He bit out, “But it seems like you are busy.”

Felicity got up in an instant, the card being shoved in her back pocket, “No. I’m coming.” She stated and didn’t say another word while walking past him.

Oliver’s gaze lingered on the guy who apparently was a reporter and now standing with his crew. He shook his head the next second and turned around and walked towards the hall.

He had other things to worry about.

…

The flashes was something that Felicity will never get used to, to be honest. People were sitting on their seats, mics clenched in their hands. Felicity had attended numerous of press conferences with Ray and with her dad too but she wasn’t in the front line.

“So are the two of back together?”

And the questions weren’t this painful.

“No.” Felicity leaned forward, her mouth hovering near the mic, “We’re not getting back together.” She looked at Oliver who was looking ahead at the crowd, “Ever.” Oliver looked at her as she uttered the word. Felicity moved back, her hands on her lap.

“So, Mr.Queen is still dating Laurel Lance?” This time it was Oliver’s turn and he smiled, “Yes.” Felicity could swear she saw Laurel grin widely at the fact and she frowned.  

“What were the two of you doing together last night?”

“Uh,” Felicity stuttered for reply, “He was just helping me,” She raised her eyebrows towards Oliver who took this as his cue and started speaking, “We’re still friends. Besides, I don’t think we owe anyone an explanation. We just wanted to clarify that we aren’t together.”

Well, that was to the point.

Clearly, Oliver was better than this than her.

…

Oliver sighed as he sipped his coffee. “Thank you for the coffee,” He told Diggle who nodded, “I needed it.” And he did. He hadn’t showered and had simply changed his clothes. He had gone through days where he hadn’t showered (Felicity used to make a face when she discovered that but he knew that even she had days when she didn’t shower) but he felt uneasy rather than dirty. The past two days had been hectic and he needed to have a warm shower to relax, just relax.

He had a pretty rough day. From the words that Felicity to now. Laurel had suggested that they should reveal they were engaged ( okay, maybe Oliver had forgotten about it) but he said no. Moira had chewed his ear off and wanted to talk to Felicity but Oliver and Diggle had to handle her. Felicity had enough for a day.

It was a rough day.

“No problem.” Diggle stated before he asked the question that had been plaguing him for quite a long time, “What happened last night? And why was Felicity’s mood off earlier?” He looked at the woman in question who was standing at one corner talking to Gerry who had appeared moments ago.

“Thea,” Oliver started, “She said her something.” Digg crossed his arms, “And you let her.” He glared at him, “You are a coward, Oliver. Why can’t you ever take a stand for her?” John shook his head in disappointment. He started to make his way towards Felicity, away from Oliver when the latter stopped him, “I tried talking okay? But she just won’t listen. She was-“ He paused, closing his eyes, “She-I should have said something, you’re right.”

Who the hell was he denying?

The comment about Conner was uncalled for. It was.

And he kept envisioning her expression.

Sure, the way she was reacting was because of the comment about Conner right? She left him for Ray, so she shouldn’t be sad about leaving him.

She wouldn’t be.

“But there is something else we need to talk about.” He told Digg, “Last night, when she was drunk...Felicity said a few things,” His voice trailed off and Diggle’s eyebrows rose in question, “She said-“ He pressed the bridge of his noise, “She said that she tried to commit suicide.”

Digg gaped, “Suicide?”

He looked at Felicity, suddenly hit by the thought that what if she really had succeeded?

“I need to-I need to know.” Oliver mumbled, “I need to know. I need to talk to her, I-“

“You weren’t there for her, Oliver.” Diggle was suddenly angry. He was this close to losing her, “You left her! And she could have-“

“I could have lost her too, okay?” Oliver frowned, “I could have lost her too.” His voice trailed off as the scenario hit his mind. He closed his eyes, “You’re not the only one.” He raised his finger, “I need –I need to get some answers. I need to talk to her. Please just help me with this, okay?” He was almost desperate.

“I’ll look into it.” Diggle crossed his arms, “I’ll-I’ll look into it.” He furrowed his eyebrows the next minute, “That’s not the only thing she said though, right?” Oliver’s expression gave it all away.

“You don’t need to worry yourself about that,” Oliver started, his fingers tightening around the coffee cup, “It was nothing serious.” He flashed him a forced smile.

John Diggle was a smart guy.

“She said something else, didn’t she?” He smiled a little, the tension easing off. “But you refuse to believe it.”

“No.”

“I’m not asking what it is but there is still something that you refuse to believe. Ever since she left, you’ve been fooling yourself. How long will that go for, Oliver?”

Oliver pressed his lips together, “I’m not fooling myself, Digg. She didn’t mean it.”

“Really?” Diggle raised his eyebrows in question, “It’s your choice whether to believe it or not. All I am saying is that if you believe the fact that she-“he paused, “tried to commit suicide then why can’t you believe the others? If that is true so are the other things.”

Oliver looked at Felicity who must have felt his gaze on her, turned to look at him too.

_I never was with Ray._

_I missed you._

_I love you._

Felicity turned her head slightly towards the left in question, waiting for something from Oliver before shaking her head and turned her attention back to Gerry. Oliver snapped out of his gaze.

_I love you._

“For how long will you continue to fool yourself, Oliver?”

_I love you._

 Oliver’s eyebrow furrowed.

_I love you._

“You don’t understand. She said she-“His phone rang and he raised his finger in the air, pausing mid-conversation. He frowned when he saw an unknown number on the screen.

“Hello?”

 _“Hello?”_ There was a female on the other line and Oliver pressed the mobile closer to his ear, “Who is this?”

_“I should be the one asking that question, don’t you think?” The lady laughed at the other end, “They were bazillion calls from this number on our landline.”_

Oliver was flustered, “I’m sorry, I don’t remember. I called a lot of people last night.”

 _“This is the Palmer Residence.”_ And suddenly the realization dawned on him. He remembered calling Ray’s home last night and he also remembered thinking why it was saved as Ray’s home in Felicity’s phone. Shouldn’t they be living together by now? He didn’t save his home number though. He had kept going back to the last dialled list.

But who was this other lady at the end?

“I’m sorry, who is this?”

_“Wait, who is this?”_

“I’m Ray’s friend. It’s been a long time since we’ve talked so-“

 _“Oh, I’m his wife. Courtney Palmer.”_ She paused, “ _Now, if you could only tell me your name, I’ll tell Ray about it.”_

Oliver took a really deep breath, “His wife, of course.” He pretended to agree with Courtney. He wanted to reach at the root of it.

Ray had a wife?

“So, I guess congratulations is in order?”

_“You’re two years too late buddy.”_

Oliver hung up.

Two years?

Ray had been married for the past two years? Then what about Felicity and him?

Ray Palmer had a wife.

Wife.

He was married.

Courtney Palmer.

The name did ring a bell though.

He just couldn’t pin point where but it did ring a bell.

God, where had he heard that name before?!

Ray was _married._

He had a _wife._

So, Felicity and him were not together? Was she the lady who was with Felicity and Ray at his dad’s funeral? Because Oliver simply thought she was Felicity’s friend or something.

Oliver’s hand tightened around his phone. He needed answers. Ray had been married for the past two years.

Two.

How could he if-

His gaze flickered towards Felicity who was talking to John.

_I never was with Ray._

_“All I am saying is, if you believe the fact that she tried to commit suicide then why can’t you believe the others? If that is true so are the other things.”_

_“For how long will you continue to fool yourself, Oliver?”_

_For how long?_


	15. Coast City

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where is there is love, There is no resentment,  
> Instead, there is hope.” – Unknown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Thank you for reading this fic! I'm so grateful to everyone of you. Hope you all like it x

**“Where is there is love, There is no resentment,**

**Instead, there is hope.” – Unknown**

**Chapter Fourteen : Coast City**

 

Oliver was confused.

Ray Palmer had a _wife._

So, did that mean Felicity and him were never together?

Questions like these kept popping up in his head. He frowned to himself as his fingers curled around the railing of the balcony. He whipped his head when he heard someone approaching him. Laurel smiled when she saw him but Oliver didn’t reciprocate it. He just turned around and chose to stare ahead instead.

“Hey,” Laurel placed her hand on his shoulder, her ring shining under the moonlight and Oliver smiled a little. “Don’t you think you’ve been spending an awful lot of time being mopey these days?”

Oliver shook his head, “I’m not mopey.” He paused, “Besides, I think it’s the just stress getting to me.”

“Stress.” He mumbled under his breathe, “Yes, it’s nothing to worry about,” he told her, his hand reaching for Laurel’s.

“How’s the hand?” she asked.

“Good,” he mumbled. He had taken off the bandage he wore on his hand hours ago. His hand was in a good shape thanks to his physiotherapist.

He knew what was coming ahead. They had talked about how he ended up with Felicity and Laurel understood-or tried to but she did express her annoyance about the fact that it was Felicity before deciding that they would go on a date the next week but they still needed to talk about some other things.

Oliver just wasn’t in the mood though.

“Ollie,” Laurel started and Oliver looked at her, “What I told you on the phone earlier today, I-I love you, okay? But these days it’s just-“

_I love you._

Oliver pinched the bridge of his nose before he placed his hands on her shoulders, “I know we have to talk about that.” He told her softly, “But not today, okay? I’m just stressed.” He bit out, “Tomorrow, first thing in the morning.”

_I love you._

He bit his lip and Laurel smiled a little, “Okay.”

Oliver smiled lopsidedly before leaning down and pecking her lips. He walked past her and out of the room, wanting to clear his head.

Yeah, he really needed to clear his head.

…

Felicity really needed to clear her head. Thea’s words kept ricocheting in her head and her lips turned upside down as she put the spoon back into the mint chip tub that she had been feeding on for the past one hour.

Doctor Who was playing on her television as she dug in for another scoop.

Thea was a bitch.

Honestly, Felicity should have told her something right there and then, at that moment. But she was so emotionally hurt and stunned that she uttered out incoherent words just to get the hell out of their presence of the Queen siblings.

Damn them.

Well, at least she wasn’t crying now. That was the only good right now-scratch that, _that_ and mint chip were the only good things now.

Although she did have bloodshot eyes.

And a rather menacing glare.

Just then her phone rang. She frowned before pressing the pause button on her remote. She groaned when she saw Walter’s name flashing on the screen.

Not today.

Today was _Sunday._

Sunday

She was supposed to be free. Come on, she didn’t even visit her dad and Conner today.

She sighed before swiping her finger across the screen, “Hello?”

She really hated everyone right now.

…

Oliver walked down the hallway wanting to head back to his room when a certain song ricocheted across the small space and he found himself turning.

_Jailhouse Rock._

Whipping his head towards the door that was slightly open, he pushed it further only to find his grandmother sitting on her bed, her head jiggling lightly as she mumbled the song along.

Oliver missed having her around. She had been living with them since his father’s demise and he was glad about it. He really did miss her.

Oliver huffed a laugh before knocking and Judith snapped her attention towards him, “Oliver!” She grinned when she saw him, her face wrinkling but she still was one of the most beautiful women in Oliver’s life, “Come here,” she patted her bed before turning off the gramophone.

Oliver didn’t waste any time as he sat beside her and to her surprise, he placed his head on her lap, his cheek landing on it and Judith frowned a little before her lips curled up, realization dawning on her, “What’s wrong?”

Oliver simply closed his eyes, “Nothing.”

“Oliver.” She ran her fingers through his hair, “What’s wrong?”

Oliver turned his head, his gaze fixating itself on the ceiling, “It’s nothing, Grammy.” He mumbled and Judith pushed her hand against the side of his head, “You’ll keep secrets from me now?” Oliver had always been close to her. Heck, Felicity was too. But at this point, Oliver certainly would prefer talking to her mother about this matter rather than his grandmother.

Why?

Because she hated Felicity.

Call him a douche, but some part of reality did dawn on him. And the more it did, the more painful it was.

But he can’t be right, can he?

But he couldn’t be- he remembered, they were together-

But he has a wife.

Two years.

Maybe they broke up.

But then what was he doing at the funeral?

Were they still friends?

What if- _what if he was wrong all along?_

The realization was painful and he knew that if he told his grandmother that, the only response he would get will be in Felicity’s favour. It might be wrong, it might be right. (Although he found himself leaning dangerously close towards the latter) And the closer he leaned, the harder was accepting the truth because then, it would all be pointless.

Everything would be _meaningless._

“Have you ever done something,” Oliver started murmuring, his eyebrows furrowing, “and then realize…there is a chance that you are _wrong,_ ” He paused, “But the thing you did,” He blinked, “Was a big thing. Like that one wrong decision changed your life but now you can just undo it. You can’t come back from it. It’s that big but you want to come back from it-“

Judith ran her fingers through his hair and Oliver stopped mid conversation, his eyes turning towards her, “Sometimes, life is unpredictable. You make some decisions instinctively and they can be wrong. But Oliver, where there is love, there is no resentment. Instead, there is hope.”

Oliver’s eyes clouded and he frowned, “Wait, love-“

“Oliver,” Judith cut him off, “There’s always hope,” she said knowingly looking in his eyes.

Oliver blinked for a second before his lips parted with the words he wanted to say dying in his throat. He let out a deep breath before getting up, “But-“

“There’s hope, Oliver.” Judith crossed her arms and leaned against the pillow lying behind her, “You still have hope-“

“Yeah,” Oliver breathed, “But what if-“

A pillow hit him, “Ow. Grams!”

“Why do you have to be so obtuse all the time? Just listen to the old lady. For god sake, I’m your father’s mother, give me some credit.”

“Fine.” Oliver raised his hands in surrender after dropping the pillow on her bed, “You are so impatient though.” He grinned a little and Judith glared at him and that was Oliver’s cue as he exited the room but not before mumbling her a thank you and receiving another glare in return which made him chuckle.

“You try waiting for almost three years, son.” Judith crossed her arms, “And they call me impatient.”

At least Oliver was coming to his senses.

It was long overdue.

…

**July 2009**

_Felicity had her head on Grammy’s lap as she combed through her blonde hair. Growing up, she didn’t have a father and her mother was in Las Vegas so she really didn’t remember the last time she had felt home. But ever since she had known Oliver, she didn’t realize how his family had become hers. She remembered how she had cried to Oliver about this, how happy she was to have found him and his family._

_She really loved them._

_She sighed before closing her eyes and she could here Grammy chuckle before she felt someone pulling her arm and she popped one eye only to see her pouting boyfriend, “It’s my turn!”_

_“Go away.” Felicity mumbled, moving her leg forward which hit Oliver, “Grams do you see her? I can’t believe you like her.” He mumbled and Felicity finally opened her eyes and glared at him, “She is here all the time so you can have your chance when I’ll leave.” Felicity closed her eyes again, “This is really good.”_

_“You’re supposed to spend time with me not with Grams.”_

_“Yeah,” Felicity started, “Like if I get up you would spend time with me. Liar.”_

_“I’m not-“_

_“That’s it,” Judith cut them off, “You two are acting like kids.” She reprimanded playfully and Oliver rolled his eyes, “Talk to her-“_

_The door of the room slammed grabbing their attention and they pivoted their heads only to find Thea holding onto her blanket, a sad look on her face and Felicity got up in a second. Thea took her place and Judith smiled a little, “What happened to my baby girl?”_

_Oliver pulled Felicity towards her and she frowned, her bottom lip jutting out, “Oliver-“_

_“No,” He started, “She is most definitely on her period.” He told her nonchalantly and Felicity gaped at him, ”Yeah?”_

_“Yeah,” Oliver nodded, “And since she has come to Grams and not to mom.” He tilted his head as he stared at his sister, “It’s bad.”_

_“Then we should help her, Oliver. Because period pain is bad. Like it feels like your insides are on fire. It’s like a message saying boom! You’re not pregnant, here now pay the price-“_

_“We should go.” Oliver mumbled, holding Felicity’s hand and she furrowed her eyebrows, “But Thea needs us-“_

_“No, this one is bad.” Oliver reasoned, “What she needs is just Grams. She knows what to do. Raisa would be coming upstairs with her special soup. We should go.”_

_“Where?”_

_“I don’t know,” Oliver admitted, “But let’s get out of here. Speedy will be cranky right now. You probably don’t want to face her wrath.”_

_“Yeah but she needs us-“_

_“I’ll check on her tonight okay?” He told her softly, “Trust me, at this point she only needs Grams.”_

_“Oh..kay.” Felicity scrunched her nose adorably, “I’ll get my clutch.” She mumbled and then turned towards Thea and Grams, “You’ll be alright, Thea?”_

_Thea groaned and buried her head in her grandmother’s lap, “Yeah, you both just take all this mush somewhere else,”_

_Felicity’s eyes widened a little and Oliver moved his hand beside his head, mumbling the word ‘crazy’. She laughed a little and Oliver grinned._

_Crazy or not._

_She definitely loved them._

…

“Ray, tell me about Ted Kord again?” Felicity mumbled, a pen fixed between her fingers as she kept on writing what he was telling her.

Walter had called her a few hours ago, in the middle of her Doctor Who marathon ruining her already _ruined_ day. And as the clock struck ten, Felicity was doing _work_ rather than relaxing. She thought that Oliver and she had done their fair share of work earlier that day when they fixed up the salary structure with Walter who told them that it was him who told Gerry to get the papers signed.

And now here she was working again.

_On a Saturday._

Apparently, Ted Kord had been facing some problems with his company. Well, that wasn’t a surprise, Felicity and Oliver did keep tab on the share market ratings and Kord Enterprises weren’t faring well. Where as Queen Consolidated was. They were the second most successful company, just behind Wayne Industries which Felicity had planned on taking over very soon. It was a surprise really that how most of the people chose to focus on the fact that they were chances that Oliver and she were getting back together rather than the success rate of the company.

Walter had told her how he has offered an acquisition between Queen Consolidated and Kord Enterprises and it did grab Felicity’s interest but not before she asked him why wasn’t he talking to Oliver and why in the world was he calling her on a Saturday night.

Oliver didn’t pick up his phone and she made a mental note to talk to him about it and then Walter told her that how Ted Kord was about to head to London for another meeting regarding his company and Felicity scoffed. Pretty bold for throwing a tantrum by the CEO of a company that needs help.

But now that Felicity thought about it could really benefit Queen Consolidated. The stocks would belong to Kord Enterprises and Queen Consolidated, most of the shares belonging to the latter and it would be QC’s aim to make sure that Kord Enterprises’ targets are met. QC would also receive cash and it will be perfect growth strategy for the other company too since QC happened to be amongst the top companies at the moment.

It would be perfect for Kord Enterprises too. It could be the rise that they need and it can push it forward to be the number one company. Now Felicity had her doubts which was why she was calling Ray who had worked under Ted Kord once.

She really needed to fix this up before Tuesday because that was the last day they could actually meet Ted Kord in Coast City.

Where was Oliver when you needed him?

Probably spending some time with Laurel.

She grumbled under her breath.

She wasn’t going to get much sleep tonight.

She really hoped that Oliver won’t get a good night sleep today either.

…

Okay, so maybe Oliver wasn’t really planning on sleeping tonight.

He pressed his eyes with the help of his thumb and middle finger and blinked as stared at the laptop.

_Courtney Palmer._

A lot of search links had popped up and he found himself clicking at one.

Getting comfortable on his bed, he waiting for the site to load.

He really had a long night ahead of him.

He would find the truth.

_There’s hope._

….

Monday approached before Oliver and Felicity could even realise. The former had been busy with his recent _findings_ and he also spent some time with his mom while the latter was busy setting up things for the acquisition.

Oliver exited the lift only to come to face to face with Diggle who just nodded at him. He had talked to John yesterday who had gritted his teeth the minute he mentioned what he thought of Ray and Felicity. John, his Grammy and his dad were the only ones who were carrying a baton for Felicity back in the day. Oliver was too much depressed and angry to listen to them and Felicity had literally been off the charts. Oliver knew where she was but he didn’t tell them. He didn’t even want to talk about her back then. He was hurt and didn’t trust her. But they did.

He couldn’t have been wrong.

They had been blinded by her.

Just like he was.

But, maybe...maybe it was him who had been blind all along.

Slowly and steadily, the realization was dawning on him but he still needed to hear it from her.

The bubble he had created for himself was yet to be broken, a small part of him still holding on to the belief that maybe they were indeed together before and he wasn’t a fool.

Because the alternative was too painful.

 Knowing that it was him-

He _couldn’t._

“Oliver!” He heard a voice call out and he stopped in the middle of his walk and pivoted his head towards the right only to find the woman who had been occupying his mind for the past three days, glaring at him. “Come here!” she instructed and Oliver’s right eyebrow rose up as he walked inside.

The cabin surely did look different from the last time he saw it. The black mahogany panelled walls paired well with the circular lights that illuminated the office with soft white light. Right in the middle of it, was a desk, its colour matching with that of the walls, two white computers placed on it and Felicity was sitting right behind them. Two white sofas were placed at one far end, a black table in the middle of it, a flower pot placed on it that he was pretty sure was Felicity’s touch. Behind Felicity was a set of white wall shelves. Randomly attached to the wall at various places, Felicity had kept her coffee mug, a couple books on it. A frame was kept on it that had the words ‘World’s Best Mom’. He remembered him giving it to her Mother’s day.

His fingers moved, turning the photo frame that was kept on Felicity’s desk. It was a picture of Conner and Felicity that he once had snapped unbeknownst to Felicity. She was lifting Conner in the air, rubbing her nose against his, the two of them smiling brightly. They had a million photos of Conner, because when you have a little baby all you want to do is grab every moment of their waking life, but this one was definitely his favourite. His wallet used to have that photo a long time ago. Tucked in the corner of the frame was another photo, this one of his dad and her. Both of them were smiling at the camera.

“Do you know what happens to Queen Consolidated when Queen goes missing?” she started talking, ignoring the way he was staring at the frame on her table, “Where the heck were you? I tried calling you but you were out with Moira and I don’t-oh, I don’t like that woman and then when I tried again there is that annoying automatic voice at the end saying that the phone was switched off! Switched off? You’re a CEO! And then when I visited your house to meet dad and Conner-you weren’t there!” She looked around, wanting to throw something at him but sighed when she didn’t find anything. “You should really be more responsible, Oliver.”

“Wait,” Oliver raised his finger in the air and then sat on a chair opposite to her, “It was a _Sunday,_ Felicity.”

“Exactly,” Felicity pointed out, “It was Sunday and I was working. _Working!”_

“Wait, what?” Oliver rolled his eyes sideways, “Why were you working?”

“You know,” Felicity leaned her elbows on her table, the red pen she was holding in her hand moving in the air, “When your co-CEO does absolutely nothing you _have_ to resort to that.”

“Done?” Oliver tilted his sideways, “Or do you want to say something else too?” He smiled sweetly and Felicity narrowed her eyes behind her glasses. Before she could utter another word, he took the file that was kept right in front of her and leaned against the chair. Felicity chewed the back side of her pen as she waited for Oliver’s reaction, “Ted Kord?” He looked at her, “His Company is facing downfall. We can’t take that much of risk. The acquisition can fund us but the risk is too high.” He shook his head, “Nope.”

“Oliver!” Felicity said, exasperated, “You don’t realise how good it can be for us. I’ve planned everything. We can achieve their targets and we have that capacity. We can buy company stock and the bidders. Oliver!”

“No. We had a merger with Merlyn Global once, let me tell you Felicity, it _sucked.”_

“That was a merger! This is an acquisition!” She stated.

“And I’ve planned everything!” Felicity bit out, “Look I’ve made charts, I talked to Walter about who has told Ted Kord that we are ready to meet him. If we can buy his company’s stock, do you realise how high can we reach, Oliver?” She moved her hand in the air, fingers dangling, “Come here. See this.”

Oliver pushed his feet against the ground and got up before making his way around the table and scooting down to see what was on the computer screen. His head was dangerously close to Felicity’s head, “I’ve planned this.” Felicity moved her pen in the air, trying to explain him the chart. It showed that by the end of this year, QC would definitely be at the top, “And I talked to Ray too! He worked under him. The guy is awesome. He has skills.”

“You talked to Ray?”

Felicity turned her head right instinctively, her eyes blinking as she realized the proximity between the two of them. She did feel his breath on her neck but she didn’t have the courage to turn towards him. “Yeah, I did.” She mumbled, her voice turning soft all of a sudden.

“Courtney too?”

And Felicity blinked before turning her head back towards the computer, “Yeah, I did.”

Oliver breathed out a sigh, “Felicity, I need to-“

“Nope!” Felicity cut him off before getting off her chair, “You’re not going to say no.” She pressed the pen against his chest, “I did not work my ass off just for you to say no. I went to MIT, give me some credit.”

“No, that’s not-“Oliver shook his head. He was about to say something but stopped when he saw how Felicity was looking at him. Her bottom lip was tucked between her teeth, her blue eyes wide full of anticipation, “You trust this?” Oliver sighed. He wasn’t really sure about this but if Felicity did then-it was okay.

“I do.”

“Then we’ll do it.”

Felicity squealed all of a sudden clapping her hands, a joyous expression on her face and Oliver huffed a laugh. Her hands moved and she took a step towards Oliver, wanting to hug him but she realized her mistake at the last minute. Her expression turning from happy to the one that said awkward and Oliver took a step back seeing this, “We’re supposed to leave tomorrow.”

“Wait, what?”

“Yup. He is going to be available only tomorrow, “ She huffed, “Considering how he needs us more, isn’t that kinda snobbish?”

“And where do we have to go?”

“Coast City.” Felicity murmured and Oliver’s eyes widened, “Right.”

“It’s a four hour journey. Well, it _should_ be of two hours but there is a stop at Gotham. So, the meeting is scheduled at eight pm tomorrow, so we can leave at twelve and reach there by four or something and talk about it.”

“Or we could just take our private plane.”

“Yeah, about that,” Felicity started, “I don’t think so. Walter took a flight for the Moscow subsidiary and the other one- “ She paused, “I want to go to Gotham, Oliver. So no. So no private plane.”

“Felicity, what is thi-“

“No.”

It would be weird and awkward, just the two of them in a plane, alone. A plane that would have a surreal environment. Soft music, air conditioner, a bottle of wine-

_No._

Oliver’s fingers twitched, fine let her have her way. Maybe he could talk to Felicity in Coast City. Talking beforehand was silly move anyway, it would affect the meeting. He still needed to clear some things out. Were the things he heard and saw, weren’t true? He needed to know. Frankly, at this point all he could think about how he never talked to her about it. What if he was wrong all along?

What if their relationship got ruined over nothing?

What if he ruined it?

He didn’t know what to think of it.

Oliver picked up the file from the table and looked at Felicity, “I’ll proofread this. Sorry for not …being there.”

What he left unsaid was how he meant this for all the times he wasn’t there when she needed him, for all those years he spent away from her and for the heartaches she had to go through because of him.

“Sorry?” Felicity mumbled in surprise. Ever since she had been back in Starling City this was probably the first time Oliver had said sorry to her. To be honest, they were a lot of things she deserved an apology for. For his harsh words and their behaviour but you know what was the worst part?

She didn’t expect him to.

She didn’t expect him to stand up against his family, against Thea, against anyone.

He never fought for her before.

What made her think that he’ll fight now?

She had lost her faith in him.

She really had, hadn’t she?

It was painful to even think about it.

“It’s okay.”

But was it, really?

…

Monday passed away in a blink of an eye. Oliver had to read the reports and then he had to inform his family of how he would be leaving the next day. He might have earned some criticism from his mother who told him that how it was a huge risk but Walter had imposed his trust in Felicity and him and he had trusted Felicity too.

They were going to do this.

On other hand, he had to explain to Laurel of how it was a business trip, completely professional. She had ranted off about how she didn’t like it was Felicity who he was going with him and he might have raised his voice telling her that Felicity was the CEO too and it was about time she accepted that.

She would always be a part of his life, no matter what.

She was his ex-wife after all.

And it was about time, she accepted that.

…

The two of them were sitting in the airplane. Felicity was sitting right in front of Oliver rather than beside much to his chagrin. Now, he knew he had to talk to her and this wasn’t the right time but she could have bought tickets that were side by side rather than away from him, couldn’t she?

There was a time when he didn’t even want to see her face but now he wanted to sit beside her and maybe be talk to her.

Just be with her.

Why?

He just didn’t know _why._

He still hadn’t talked to her, he still didn’t know whether he was right or wrong-so, why did he want to sit right beside her?

Oliver closed his eyes and leaned against the first class seat, getting comfortable on it, his hand curling around the glass of wine he had ordered.

He really needed to figure this out, didn’t he?

…

The plane stopped at Gotham after a journey of one hour. It was one pm now and Felicity had to groan because she really didn’t want to leave her movie in the middle. Some people would say, she should probably focus on the meeting but she had done most of the job and whatever bits of it were left will be covered in Coast City.

“So,” She blinked when she saw Oliver hovering above her, “You wanted to see Gotham, right?”

“Yeah,” Felicity turned over to fetch her bag, getting her clutch out of it. She placed the bag on her seat, the airline tag hanging on its strap, “Why are you-“ She turned towards Oliver who standing beside her and blinked, “You want to come too?”

“Yeah,” Oliver started, “It’s a new place so it’s better if we stick around and-“

“That’s fine.” Felicity did look flustered for a second before she shook her head lightly and walked past him.

Wasn’t this the reason why she didn’t want to go in a private plane instead?

They still would be stuck together.

Because, _of course_ they would be.

…

Felicity tapped her fingers on the table impatiently as she waited for her food. Oliver was sitting right in front of her. The two of them had visited a market that happened to be quite close to the airport and sat down for lunch after visiting it. “You really didn’t need to be here, you know,” Felicity started off, “If you wanted to go back-“

“No, it’s fine.” Oliver placed his hands on the table, interlocking his fingers, “Besides, I’ve already ordered so,” his voice trailed off and Felicity hummed, her eyes ending up on the table finding it way too interesting.

“So, you live in Central City, right? How’s life there?”

“Wait, how do you know I live in Central City?” Felicity leaned her elbow against the table as she stared at him and Oliver coughed, “There’s just one Palmer Technologies and that is located in Central City.”

Felicity tilted her head sideways and Oliver’s eyebrow rose, a mix of amusement and trepidation across his face. She opened her mouth to say something when they were interrupted by the waiter who kept two glasses of wine in front of them. Felicity eyebrows quirked in question, “We didn’t order-“ She whacked Oliver’s arm that was reaching for the glass kept in front of it, “It must be complementary!” He reasoned and Felicity ignored it, “This is not ours.”

Lines appeared on the waiter’s forehead and he turned around, looking towards the door that had the word staff written over it. People were peeking through the small glass circle in the middle of it, “But ma’am, I was told-“

“Oh my god!” A voice caught them by surprise and Felicity gaped, “What are you doing?” A guy approached them who looked like he was in his early twenties. His black hair was messed up and his grey eyes were full of confusion, his nose scrunching as line appeared on his forehead, “This is not my table! That is my table!” He almost shouted and Felicity shared a look with Oliver who was trying his very best to control his smile. “I swear you are going to mess up my proposal.”

Felicity bit her lip, “Proposal?” The guy looked at her and nodded his head vigorously before picking up the wine glass that was kept in front of her, “This one has a ring in it and someone-“He glared at the waiter, “was close to messing this up.” The person on the receiving side gulped nervously.

“You’re proposing?” Felicity smiled at that, “The ring is in the glass-that is so romantic.” She clapped her hands involuntarily and showed her pearly whites.

“Or she could choke and die.” Oliver reasoned nonchalantly and Felicity glared at him harshly causing him to back track as he stared at the horrified face of the guy, “Which she would not. How could she?” He mumbled, “She won’t.”

“This is really sweet,” Felicity smiled at the nervous lad, “I’m sure she would love it. It’s amazing.” She moved her arms in emphasis.

“It’s not that good.” Oliver stated, his eyebrow quirking, a small part of him feeling offended.

Felicity let out a sound that sounded like ‘pfft’ and Oliver gaped, “You’re making that sound.”

“What sound?”

“You don’t agree with me.”

Felicity laughed a little before she got up, “Don’t even try and criticise his proposal. You proposed to me when I was _ill.”_

“I wasn’t prepared for it. It just came out. You know that! And you loved it.”

Her voice turned soft, “Yeah.”

“Besides, the second proposal was _amazing.”_

Felicity chose to ignore him and got up before winking at the guy, “She’ll definitely say yes.” She was about to walk past him when he stopped, “Are you going to the restroom?”

“Yeah,” Felicity mumbled, unsure about where he was leading the conversation, “Can you haul my girlfriend for a little while? She’s a ginger.” He described her and Felicity nodded instantly, “Of course.”

“So, marriage huh?” Oliver started and the guy gulped, “Yeah.”

“You’re jumping in a well, buddy.” He started before he decided to mess with the guy again, “And that is assuming that she won’t choke and die.”

“Oliver!”

Oliver tried to control his laughter when he heard his ex-wife sigh in exasperation.

“You guys have been together for how many years?”

“Oh, we’re not.” Oliver explained in a second, “We’re divorced.” He bit his lip, “Actually, I have a girlfriend.” He nodded his head absentmindedly. The guy’s eyes widened in disbelief, “Right. Sorry.”

‘It’s okay.” Oliver mumbled, “Now let’s get that drink on the right table, shall we?”

…

**September 2009**

_“Here, drink this.”_

_Felicity whimpered as Oliver lifted her head, as he placed the spoon in her mouth and Felicity’s face scrunched up as the bitter taste hit her taste buds, “Yuck.” She murmured, her voice hoarse._

_Felicity placed her head back on the pillow as Oliver screwed the cap back on, “Feeling better?”_

_“No.” Felicity groaned and closed her eyes._

_She was dying._

_Her voice was hoarse, her nose was blocked, her cheeks were red which should be a good thing except it wasn’t because she had fever._

_So yup, she was dying._

_Luckily Oliver had come in earlier today when she didn’t reply to his texts only to find her hogging her bed, tissues all around, covered with a blanket._

_He got her Raisa’s special soup which was amazing, yup it tasted like heaven and then he had placed a wet cloth on her forehead just to get her temperature down._

_He was a sweetheart._

_But she was still cranky and still icky so she murmured a no._

_Being sick is pathetic._

_“Move that side.” He mumbled and Felicity frowned, “No, I’ll get you sick too.”_

_Oliver ignored her and repeated his words as he took off his shoes and Felicity sighed before she felt his arms around her and Felicity wiggled a little before placing her head on chest, “I’m going to get you sick.”_

_“I don’t care,” Oliver told her, kissing her forehead and she closed her eyes, “I like this though. Cuddling is fun.” She murmured, “Getting sick is not fun though. But we get to cuddle, so I’m okay.”_

_“Shh,” Oliver whispered, shushing her, “You need rest. We have Diggle and Lyla’s wedding to attend this weekend. You don’t want to be sick when that happens, right?”_

_Felicity’s eyes almost popped out of skull, “Wedding.” she muttered, her voice cracking, “We have to go to a wedding. I haven’t even gotten them a gift yet.” She looked up at Oliver who smiled a little, “Yeah, for that you need to get well soon.”_

_Felicity wiggled a little and placed her arm across Oliver’s stomach, “We have to get them a gift.”_

_“Get well soon, first.” Oliver laughed, “Look at me,” Felicity did so and Oliver smirked, “I’m getting fit day by day,” And Felicity let out a hoarse chuckle and she patted her hand that was lying on his stomach, “I can see that.”_

_“And you’re getting fat day by day.”_

_Felicity gasped at that and whacked him across his stomach while he chuckled, “I’m sick, okay?”_

_“That is why you know,” Oliver grinned, “You’re spreading like an omelette.”_

_Felicity pushed him off the bed and he landed up on the floor with a thump, his chuckle ricocheting across her bedroom, “Get out.” Felicity huffed and Oliver continued laughing but when he didn’t get a chuckle from his girlfriend, he frowned._

_“Oh come on, “Oliver got on his knees, “I was joking.”_

_“Pathetic.” Felicity started, “I’m not fat!” She tried to hit him but he dodged it last minute. “You’re such an asshole.” She sniffed._

_Oh god, he really had pissed her off._

_She was pulling the asshole card._

_“You’re not fat,” Oliver crawled on his knees, “Come on, Felicity.”_

_Felicity didn’t look at him._

_“Fe-li-ci-ty.”_

_She turned around._

_Oliver huffed, “I was joking. Come on, I love you, you know that! You’re not fat. You’re beautiful Heck, I even got you a wedding ring this afternoon. What else-“ His voice trailed off and Felicity turned her body around, her eyes widening behind her glasses as she sniffed._

_What?_

_Wait, what?_

_“Ring?”_

_Oliver bit his lip and he closed his eyes tightly before opening them, “Marry me?”_

_“What?” Felicity almost shrieked, “You’re proposing to me now!” She flung her pillow at him, “Oliver! I’m sick!”_

_“It just came out!” Oliver defended, “I had plans too, okay? You make me nervous.”_

_Felicity huffed, “Yeah right.” She whimpered, “I can’t even cry happily! I’m ill God dammit!” She picked out a tissue from the box kept on the side table and sniffed._

_Oliver took out a blue velvet box and Felicity tilted her head sideways, “Felicity Smoak, will you marry me?”_

_God, he was so unprepared._

_Felicity looked at him as tears collected in her eyes, “Yes, you fool.”_

_She loved him._

_Of course, she would marry him._

_It’s been eight months since they have been dating._

_Almost two years since they have known each other._

_And she hasn’t been this sure about anything else before._

_Who do you see beside you in the next ten years?_

_It was him._

_He was her future._

_And she had no shred of doubt about that._

_Oliver grinned a little before taking out the ring and Felicity moved her hand forward. He placed it in her ring finger and Felicity coughed a little before speaking, “Is that a wedding ring?”_

_“Yeah,” Oliver rubbed an imaginary kink behind his neck, “I was thinking that we can go shopping for an engagement ring, later on. Because they were a lot of choices and I got confused and Tommy was no help either-“_

_He was such a dork._

_“Wedding ring?”_

_“We’ll go for an engagement ring shopping though! Buy whatever you find perfect.”_

_Her adorable dork._

_“I wish I could kiss you right now,” Felicity mumbled, a small smile on her face and she lied down on her bed, her back against the mattress. Oliver smiled at that, “Yeah?”_

_Oliver lied down beside her and Felicity squinted her eyes to read the text that was written on the ring._

_Forever Yours._

_“I really love you, you know?” She kissed his cheek before she hugged him tightly, her cheek landing on his chest._

_“I love you too,” He grinned at her, “I can propose again you know?”_

_“No.” Felicity said all of sudden surprising him, “It’s perfect.” She looked at her ring again before looking at Oliver, “It’s perfect.”_

_“You sure?”_

_She looked at him, “I’m sure.” She said softly._

_She had everything she needed._

_It was a weird proposal but it was definitely precious._

_“It’s perfect.”_

_“Yeah?” He smiled at her._

_“Yeah,” She smiled before closing her eyes and hugging him._

_It might not be the best proposal but it definitely was precious._

_A sick girlfriend and a wedding ring._

_And a really loving boyfriend._

_Fiancé._

_Oh, it was definitely precious._

…

Felicity sighed as she got comfortable on her seat after unbuckling the seatbelt. The guy who was sitting beside her had dropped down at Gotham apparently and she could finally enjoy her movie properly without any disturbance. She reclined the seat completely, reaching for the blanket that she had asked for at the beginning of this flight. The headphones were in place and her heels had been discarded. She leaned her head on the pillow, enjoying the film ‘The Amazing Spider Man’ that she had left in the middle.

Engrossed in the movie, she didn’t realize that Oliver had gotten up from his seat until a soft press on her shoulder grabbed her attention. Removing one side of the headphone, she heard Oliver speak, “Is someone sitting there?” He pointed towards the seat right beside her and Felicity frowned and then she shook her head.

Why did he want to sit there?

Wasn’t this one of the many reasons of why she didn’t want a private plane, so they are not in each other’s vicinity?

Oliver smiled a little at that and Felicity had to lift the headphones, causing him to bend a little to move under the wire connecting them to the small screen.

Felicity didn’t realize how she had smiled involuntarily while watching him get comfortable on the seat.

She didn’t realize when she succumbed to sleep while watching the film.

But she certainly did realize and recognize the hand that had brushed her cheek for a second, had taken off her glasses and then had pulled the blanket over her before the darkness hit her.

Yeah, she recognized that.

She recognized him.

…

Felicity watched Oliver nod his head as he talked to Gerry and heaved a sigh of relief. They had decided that they would not be travelling with their assistants because two CEOs were enough. They were two of them. They surely could handle this.

The clock had struck eight a few minutes ago and Felicity bit her lip as her gazed fixed itself at the entrance of the restaurant of the hotel they were staying in. She sighed, crossing her legs as she sat on the leather ottoman waiting for Ted Kord to pop up any minute. She honestly would have ordered a wine but she felt it would be kind of rude to do so before Ted arrived.

“Everything went well,” Oliver started as he got comfortable on the leather seat too, “Except Isabel Rochev. She freaked out.”

Felicity cringed a little, “I’m glad I wasn’t there to witness it. You know the other day she was looking at me like-“Her words got caught in her throat when she saw guy who probably was in his early thirties. He was wearing a grey suit and holding a briefcase. And now that Felicity noticed, he was totally _rocking_ the suit. His brown eyes were wide in anticipation, his brown hair combed neatly and he flashed his pearly whites as he shook hands with Oliver, “Ted Kord.” He introduced himself and Oliver stood up to shake his hand, “Oliver Queen.”

Ted turned towards Felicity who moved her hand towards him, “Felicity Smoak.” He tilted his head sideways, “I know, Walter talked a lot about you both.” He smiled, “Something weird?” Felicity blinked, when he didn’t remove his gaze from her, “Nothing, just didn’t imagine you like this.” Her posture suggested _friendly,_ a lot different than the women he had seen in the business field.

Felicity frowned, not understanding, eyebrows still touching her hairline, “Beautiful. Imagine you being this beautiful.”

 “Yeah,” Ted started, sharing a look with Oliver, “Sorry about that. Traffic is no one’s friend.” He tried to laugh a little and Oliver simply glared at him causing him to stop chuckling, “Right. Business?”

Felicity looked at Oliver before opening the laptop bag and taking out the files and laptop.

Business it was.

…

**November 2009**

_In hindsight, Felicity should have realized what it was._

_The two of them were in a park where Oliver had organized a dinner for just the two them. They were right underneath the stars, the yellow lights that were on the trees were illuminating the park. Two glasses of champagne were placed on the table and some pretty amazing food it. The dinner was amazing and Felicity had been grinning like a fool the entire time._

_It was perfect._

_Oliver moved his hand forward and captured hers and Felicity looked up. He looked really handsome in business suit. Usually on their dates, they are dressed pretty causally but today Oliver had told her to dress formally._

_See? So many hints._

_She should have figured it out._

_“Felicity Smoak,” Oliver began, “I love you.” The woman in question smiled, “You are my soul mate. I knew it from the moment we met that we were a perfect fit.” Felicity blushed but didn’t say anything._

_She did have an idea where this conversation was heading._

_“The best thing-“Oliver paused, his forehead wrinkling, “The best thing in this world is you and you’re my best friend. We can-“ He groaned, “We can-“_

_Felicity chuckled._

_He raised his finger in the air and took out a piece of paper from his pocket. Felicity giggled when he let go of her hand and instead placed it right under her chin, “Dammit, I mixed the first two lines.” He frowned before looking at Felicity, “The best thing about me is you.” He looked at her and gulped when Felicity nodded, “We can weather..?”_

_Great, he could not even understand his own handwriting._

_Felicity dissolved into peals of laughter and Oliver narrowed his eyes, throwing the piece of paper on the table, “Very funny, isn’t it?”_

_Felicity didn’t say a word and she began reading before frowning, “Oliver, your writing is getting worse day by day.” She mused and Oliver huffed, “You know how long did I search on internet?”_

_Felicity squinted her eyes as she read, “We can weather any storm. With you I am never...alone?” She frowned, “We are mea- this is too hard.” She laughed._

_Oliver let out his breathy laugh, accompanied with a glare. “But this is really sweet, Oliver. Despite the end part,” She chuckled and Oliver sighed before raising his finger in the air. “This is-“_

_Oliver walked towards her and got down on his knee before holding her left hand, “Felicity Smoak. The first time, I saw you I remember thinking that you were beautiful person and then you hit me with a pan. But what I didn’t know that it was a start of something,” Felicity bit her lip, “You have been with me through everything. You’ve seen my worst and you’ve seen my best and you accept me and love me. So, I never want to let go of this love. I want to wake up to hearing you sing in the shower. To you being all cranky until you get cup of coffee. You running around the entire house because you can’t find your favourite pair of pyjamas, I want to wake up with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. So, Felicity Meghan Smoak, will you marry me?”_

_Felicity laughed through her tears, “I am already wearing the ring.” She raised her left hand, “Yes.”_

_Oliver took a deep breath and Felicity launched herself at him. Hugging him tightly, she whispered in his ear, “I told you I don’t need anything else.”_

_“I just wanted it to be perfect.” Oliver murmured, hugging her back and Felicity pulled away. The two of them were on their knees and the female grinned, “It was. It is.” She grinned brightly, “It’s perfect.” She placed her hand on his cheek._

_She had him._

_That was all she needed._

_“This was better than internet, wasn’t it?”_

_“Way better.” Felicity laughed before kissing him._

_This was perfect._

…

Oliver and Felicity were walking side by side as they headed towards their respective rooms that happened to be opposite to each other. Awkward silence was reigning between them. While Felicity just wanted to reach her room, Oliver was contemplating whether he should talk to Felicity or not. This was his last chance. They had a twelve pm flight tomorrow, and this was the only alone time he would get with her.

Should he go for it?

Felicity bit her lip before speaking, “It went well, didn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Oliver nodded his head, “It did. I’m glad I agreed to this.” Felicity shot him a smug smile and he laughed it off.

Two seconds later they approached their rooms and the two of them exchanged a look, mumbling a quiet ‘good night’ to each other, they headed towards their room.

Well, Felicity did.

Oliver stood right there, the card key of his room in his hand as he took a deep breathe. Sighing to himself, he closed his eyes.

This was the only chance he had.

He turned around, raising his fist to knock at Felicity’s door and she opened the door a second later, her blonde head peeking out, her hair in a disarray because she had opened them mere seconds ago, “May I come in?” he murmured and Felicity almost contemplated shutting the door because why did he want to come in?

She had seen movies and she certainly wasn’t hoping for anything.

But then again, what would happen?

She sighed as she opened the door allowing him in, “We need to talk.”

His words were serious and a sudden realization dawned on Felicity and she crossed her arms, mentally telling herself to be strong and to face whatever was coming ahead of it.

It was about time, wasn’t it?

 

 

 

 

 


	16. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is no trust, there is no love. - Unknown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Thank you so much for reading and sticking around with this fic! I hope you all like this chapter! x
> 
> Just a quick reminder that this story is ahead on FF.net and the reason why it's behind here is because it's getting betaed :D
> 
> Thank you once again! x

To say that Felicity was nervous would be an understatement.

To say that she wasn’t ready would be an understatement as well.

Ever since she had come to back Starling she had thought about confronting her fears and she had. She had seen Conner, had also managed to face her former family and she was steps away from her closure.

She needed closure.

That is why she didn’t say a word as he stepped beside her because in all honesty even she wanted answers.

Why did he have to leave her?

Why did he cheat?

She might have pushed him away and she had admitted it to herself that it was she who was at fault at that and she had made efforts to fix their relationship.

Except he had rebuked them.

Post breakup, a small part of her, agreed with him. The therapy sessions were done, she was making progress and she was absorbing reality but she still hadn’t reached the end of it. And Oliver had made her see it.

Despite everything, she would always be Conner’s _murderer._

It took a long while to get in touch with reality. When she had shifted to Central City, she had _lost_ herself completely. When her baby died, she had lost herself but when Oliver left her she had lost herself _completely._

She wasn’t Felicity _Queen._

She was Felicity _Smoak._

Divorced.

Childless.

The thought made her curl up in a ball and cry.

She had lost everything.

Oliver.

_Conner._

_Her family._

…

**March 2012**

_Felicity smiled at the cashier before picking up the bag full of groceries with her right hand. Her left arm was underneath Conner, supporting the one year old who was busy jiggling the small packet of skittles that she had gotten. He wiggled it right in front of Felicity’s face which made her chuckle._

_“Bye,” the cashier in her early twenties waved her hand at Conner and Felicity put left shoulder forward so that Conner could see her. “Say bye, Conner” she told him and he blinked at her before wiggling the brown skittles packet in the air which made a lot of noise. The cashier whose name was Katelyn, now that Felicity saw her name tag laughed, “You like skittles?”_

_“He loves skittles.” Felicity stated before turning her gaze towards her son, “You love skittles, don’t you?” She retorted softly and Conner cheered, “Skit!” He waved the packet again and Felicity bumped her forehead against his lightly, “Yeah.”_

_“You have a really beautiful baby.”_

_“Thank you,” Felicity smiled, “Now say bye Conner.” The guy in question didn’t do anything for the next two seconds and Felicity had to murmur bye again so that he gets it. Oliver and she had taught him that. The baby looked at the cashier lady before moving his hand in the air and smiling. The cashier laughed before waving goodbye and Felicity mumbled a thank you before heading out of the store. It was good that there wasn’t a line behind her._

_She pressed the button on her car key before opening the door of her car. Opening the door of the back seat, she kept the grocery bag down and then closed it. She opened the front door before getting inside her car. She placed Conner on the car seat and then buckled him. He squealed a little and Felicity ran her fingers on his stomach causing him to burst into giggles, moving his skittles back and forth. She buckled a seat belt around him and then proceeded to close the door of her car._

_Looking at Conner once again before she started the car, she bit back a groan as she saw him chewing on his packet, a small end of it now torn open. He could swallow a candy for all she knew._

_“Conner,” she chastised lightly before taking away the packet causing the baby to whine loudly. She took the packet away before reaching down and wiping the patch of drool on his mouth, “How many times have I told you not to chew on it?” She talked to him as if he could understand her and he squirmed in protest. He was still too little to eat skittles and Felicity usually just handed him the packet because he found it too fascinating. To top it all, Conner recognized the brand and cribbed until he got it. But Felicity had made sure he never ate it._

_Felicity turned her head around to fetch him another packet and Conner whined loudly, moving his open palm and hitting Felicity’s golden hair, “Mama!”_

_“One second baby,” Felicity murmured before taking out another pack of skittles and then handing it over to him, “No chewing alright?” She waved the packet and his blue eyes brightened as she handed it him._

_The car revved as she started driving making sure to turn on the radio. Conner really loved music. And as if on cue, the little guy had started clapping. He had been doing this since the very beginning. Nobody had to teach him that. He always had this reaction to music. Felicity laughed watching him babble incoherent things and clapping his hands._

_She frowned a little as she watched a bike zoom past her. The guy really seemed in a hurry, his speed way past the speed limit. She ignored it, focusing on the road instead. Her frown deepened when she realized that they were more guys behind her car, on their bikes, their speed way past the limit. A chorus of laughter reached her ears and she realized they were racing._

_Her hand curled around the steering wheel. She looked down at Conner who was giggling happily and Felicity breathed._

_Maybe she was thinking too much._

_The next second, she felt something ram the back of her car and she lurched forward, her hand instinctively moving in front of Conner who squealed loudly. Thankfully, the seat belts prevented them from moving forward and she cursed under her breath. She was about to stop her car at one side, wanting to thrash some sense in those teenagers but the next second, another bike hit the end of her car causing her to skid._

_The car moved haphazardly and Felicity kept moving the steering wheel hastily. Her eyes widened when she saw her car heading towards a street light. She gasped before throwing herself over Conner and the front corner of the car hit the street light, the bumper coming off before the car flipped. Shards of glass were everywhere and the hood was crushed, smoke escaping through it._

_Dread._

_That was all Felicity could feel in that moment._

_Conner was in the car with her._

_The pain hit her in various places and the metallic taste in her mouth became prominent with every second and she realized her glasses were cracked. A shrill cry echoed and she whimpered, her hands moving so she could feel Conner._

_He needed to be alright._

_He had to be alright._

_She couldn’t lose him._

_Except, she did._

….

Oliver closed his eyes for a second before opening them. The words died in his throat and he gave it a thought for a split second before talking.

Now or never.

“Did you cheat on me with Palmer?”

Okay, Felicity did _not_ expect that.

“I’m sorry?”

“Did you or did you not cheat on me with Palmer?”

She frowned, the word ‘No’ dying on her lips when she saw his expression. “You…you thought I cheated on you with Ray?” her voice wavered and suddenly Oliver felt his knees buckling, “You did not?”

“You thought… I _cheated?”_ Felicity pointed towards herself and her mouth parted open in surprise, “I would have never cheated on you, Oliver! It was you who cheated on me!” she said vigorously, her teeth gritting and a second later, her voice softened, “How could you even think that?”

It took her ten seconds to put two and two together and a strangled sob escaped her lips.

He thought she _cheated._

_Cheated._

“Is...is that why you cheated?” She muttered out as she sat on her couch, she was afraid her legs would give out any minute, “You thought that I had cheated.”

Oliver had no response. Honestly, in that moment he didn’t know how to say anything. He had been wrong about everything. This was something that he had been afraid of since the very beginning.

Realizing that it was _him_ that ruined their relationship.

_Not her._

_Him._

_And he lost the love of his life…just like that._

“Care to tell me how the fuck did you reach that conclusion?!” Oliver cringed when he heard Felicity swore and he tried to blubber out a response.

And after the realization, anger hit.

He was angry at himself for jumping to conclusions. Angry at her for hiding things. Angry at his mom for getting the divorce papers.

Angry at _everything._

_He was furious._

“How could I not?” Oliver chuckled hoarsely, “How could I not? It was right in front of my eyes!” he bellowed all of a sudden, standing up and Felicity glared at him through her tears. She wasn’t going to cry. No she won’t even shed a tear for _him._ “This makes no sense.”

Oliver closed his eyes and pressed the palm of his hands against them.

Fuck.

How in the world could he be wrong?

It was right in front of his eyes.

He remembered.

But she was speaking the _truth._

And he knew it was the truth.

_The realization was painful._

Felicity saw red. This was too much. Yes, she wanted answers. But this confrontation was nothing like she had predicted and her hands fisted as a lone tear fell down her eye. Wiping it hastily, she reached for the marble turtle lying on the side table and flung it towards him, “You thought I was having an affair with Ray? You’re such a fucking asshole!”

Oliver ducked last minute, the turtle landing at the other end of the room. “Felicity!”

“You thought I cheated on you?!” she got up from the couch, her hands flaying before she looked around, trying to look for another thing to hit him with and growled in frustration when she couldn’t find anything. She closed her eyes tightly, tears trying to fight the barriers she had created.

“It was right in front of my eyes, Goddamit!” Oliver raised his hands in the air, “You can’t blame me! Every time something happened you turned to fucking Palmer! What was I supposed to believe?!”

“That’s because my _husband_ walked out on me! You were seeking comfort from your family, Oliver!” she shouted as she turned towards him. Her hands landed on her sides with a thump and she tilted her head sideways, her face coiling up in pain, “You were with them. You had Laurel who was your ex-girlfriend comforting you but I trusted you,” she whimpered, “I trusted you. Why couldn’t you?”

“Why didn’t you trust me Oliver?”

Why didn’t he?

They were many a times in the past he had thought about talking to Felicity. He had tried talking to her in tits and bits but they never had a full-fledged conversation.

Why didn’t they?

Why didn’t he trust her?

“I-“ Oliver started but he didn’t know what to say. He sighed to himself, “I saw things, Felicity. And I put two and-“ he paused, turning his gaze away, “two together. It just happened. I saw you with him discussing about going to Central City, you had his number on your phone by another name Felicity.” “You were hiding something, _what was I supposed to believe?”_

What was he supposed to believe really?

How could everything go so wrong?

 _“_ What?”

“Everything made sense.” Oliver murmured before getting down on his knees and sitting on the floor. Leaning his back against the couch, he murmured, “How?”

“I don’t know Oliver,” Felicity mumbled who was mirroring Oliver’s position, sitting at the other end, “How could you?”

_How could you?_

….

**April 2012**

_It had been five weeks since Conner’s death and situation had somehow gotten better. Felicity still mourned and so did Oliver and the others but they were finding comfort in each other._

_Felicity shot Oliver a grateful smile as he got her a cup of coffee. Taking a sip of the beverage, she sighed a little as she got comfortable on the bench. They were sitting on the terrace of the Queen Mansion because the weather was ‘awesome’ as Thea had eloquently quoted it and it was. Felicity was pretty sure that it would rain any minute._

_She felt Oliver’s arms around her waist from behind before he dropped a kiss on her shoulder, “The weather is good, isn’t it?”_

_In normal situations, they would have sat in the Queen’s Garden but ever since Conner’s grave lay there, Felicity refused. She hadn’t even seen him once since the day of his funeral._

_It was too painful._

_“Felicity?”_

_Huh?” She mumbled, not really aware of what he was talking out and Oliver huffed before pressing his cheek against hers, his scruff pinching her skin ever so slightly, “It’s going to be alright, Felicity.”_

_“Is it? Will it ever be?”_

_“We’re trying, aren’t we?” Oliver mumbled and Felicity smiled a little, “Yeah, we’re trying.”_

_“Come on,” Oliver held her before pulling her towards him, “Let’s go.”_

_“Where?”_

_“Somewhere,” Oliver grinned cheekily before dragging her down the stairs._

_Thea watched the two of them coming down the stairs and frowned, “Where are you guys going?” She asked as she stood up from the settee she was sitting on, “Somewhere.” Felicity echoed Oliver’s response before placing her empty coffee mug on the table._

_“I’ll join you guys too!” Thea looked at Oliver for approval who nodded his head, his eyes moving towards Felicity and then towards his sister who realized he was up to something but didn’t say a word._

_The three of them stepped outside the mansion and Felicity started to make her way towards the front gate when Oliver stopped her and instead started dragging her the way. Thea followed suit, although she did need to rack her brain in thinking about what her brother was up to._

_Oliver stopped all of a sudden and Felicity looked at him before turning towards the sight in front of them, “Let’s go for a drive.”_

_No._

_No._

_Felicity started shaking her head almost instantly. “No, no,” She shook her head hastily, “Not a car.”_

_No cars._

_The last time she was in a car, she lost Conner._

_This time, she could lose Oliver._

_No._

_Absolutely not._

_The dreadful incident kept playing in her mind all over again and she whimpered, holding onto Oliver’s Henley, “No, we won’t drive. We can’t drive.” She mumbled, “Don’t-“ She looked at Oliver who placed his hands on her shoulders, “Shh.” He mumbled and Felicity shook her head, “No, Oliver-you don’t know! We lost Conner this way, we could-“_

_“Shhh.” Oliver shushed her before cupping her face, “We’re not going in a car, okay?” Felicity hugged him and Oliver’s arms tightened around her, “We’re not going in a car.”_

_Felicity nodded against his chest and closed her eyes, “Not a car.”_

_Thea stood right behind Felicity, her eyes meeting her brother’s who smiled at her, “What?” He mouthed to her, trying not to show his weakness.  Thea tilted her head sideways as she watched the two, her lower lip tucked between her teeth as she fought her tears._

_Just then the clouds thundered and the next second, torrential downpour began._

_Good._

_Maybe they could fool each other into believing that the water dripping down their face were raindrops rather than tears._

….

_It all went downhill from there._

_Felicity usually stayed cooped up in her room or in Conner’s nursery and refused to talk to anyone. Oliver understood. She was dealing with the grief but even he had a saturation point. She had finally managed to get past some of it but now she was back to square one._

_And Oliver was frustrated._

_“Felicity!” Oliver’s voice rose ever so slightly when Felicity didn’t respond to him and she flinched for a second, “What?”_

_“Get out of your bed.” He told her simply and Felicity frowned, “What?”_

_“Get out, okay?” He said before fixing his tie in front of the mirror, “I’ll drop you off at QC while going to Verdant.”_

_Felicity shrugged before hugging her knees, “I don’t travel in cars.”_

_“We’ll go on my bike.”_

_“With a business suit. Talk about fashion trends,” She closed her eyes._

_“We’re going on my bike.”_

_“But I don’t want to go.”_

_“Dammit Felicity!” Oliver shouted all of a sudden and before she knew it, he was sitting right in front of her, “Conner died, alright? We can’t get him back. Stop living in the past! We have to focus on the present. Don’t ruin your present for something that cannot happen. He was my son too. I miss him so much,” His voice softened, “But he is gone. And nothing can change it.”_

_Felicity’s eyes filled with tears and she shook her head hastily. “You don’t get it. I don’t deserve all of this. It’s my fault he is dead. I don’t deserve the sympathy. I don’t deserve to live when he didn’t-“_

_Oliver pulled her closer, his hands resting on her arms, “What if it was me in the car that day?”_

_“Wha..what?”_

_“What if I was the one who was driving that day? Would you still blame me for Conner’s death?”_

_“Of course not.” She shook her head hastily and she knew where Oliver was going with this._

_She knew that she wouldn’t blame Oliver._

_And she knew that no one was blaming her._

_But they should._

_It was her conscience that was eating her on the inside._

_If she hadn’t gone to that store, her baby would still be alive giggling happily._

_But all that graced her ears was silence._

_Dreadful silence._

….

“What made you think that?” Felicity whispered softly, moving her head so that it laid on the couch, “What made you think that I was cheating on you with Ray? You knew he was like a brother to me. He has a wife for God sake,”

“I didn’t know about the wife part.” Oliver bit out and Felicity chuckled dryly, “Courtney came to our wedding Oliver.”

“I knew that name was familiar,”

“Still doesn’t change the fact that you didn’t trust me _.”_

“Felicity, I-“ Oliver started but Felicity glared at him, her eyes glossy, “Just start speaking. I’m not in mood for a heart to heart, Oliver.”

 Oliver closed his eyes and started speaking.

…

**April 2012**

_Oliver had left._

_To be honest, Felicity had it coming. She had been pushing him away for quite a while and sooner or later, he had to crack. `_

_Why is that when you lose something you realize how important they were?_

_A small part of her knew, she didn’t deserve him after what she did. But a large part of her wanted him by her side._

_She sniffed before she dialled his number. She had been staying at their house for the past few days while Oliver stayed at the mansion. It was Felicity’s decision because she felt like she was being a burden of all of them and didn’t want to trouble them further. Robert and Moira had protested a lot but she didn’t listen to him._

_She just wanted to get away from the mansion where his grave lay._

_And most of Conner’s memories were there._

_She thought Oliver would come along with her too._

_Except he didn’t._

_He had dropped her off before heading towards Tommy’s loft where he was staying._

_Apparently, no one wanted to stay at the mansion._

_It wasn’t any different though. Thea had been staying here for the past few days and everyone visited her occasionally. Lyla had wanted to stay too but backed out last minute (Felicity had a nagging feeling it was because she didn’t want her to feel sad with Sara being there) Carly and Sara had offered to stay too. Heck, her mom was on her way back to Starling for the second time since the funeral but she refused. Everyone offered to stay._

_Except him._

_He didn’t._

_He wasn’t here._

_And it hurt._

_Pressing the phone against her ear, she waited anxiously for him to pick up his phone. Her breath hitched when someone did pick up but her hope deflated when it was Tommy on the other end telling her that Oliver was busy and he wasn’t available at the moment._

_“He didn’t answer?” Thea asked her._

_“He didn’t.”_

…

“I used to call you every day,” She mumbled, her eyes turning towards the floor.

“I used to wait for your call every day,” Oliver admitted, “I used to stare at the phone every day waiting for call and think that whether I should pick it up or not. I didn’t want to see you like that Felicity,” He murmured, turning towards her and he watched Felicity bite her lip, “I didn’t. And I also wanted you to feel the same way I as feeling. I lost him too, Felicity.”

Oliver waited for Felicity’s response.

She didn’t say anything.

_…_

**April 2012**

_“You shouldn’t avoid her calls,” Tommy spoke and Oliver looked up from his seat on his couch, “I know,” Oliver countered before keeping his phone back on the table._

_“You shouldn’t have done that.” Diggle joined in the conversation, “This is not the answer to your problem, Oliver. You’re supposed to help her through this. We all are supposed to.”_

_“She is being taken care of,” Oliver muttered, “I call home to check on her every day. But I can’t be there, Digg,” he bit his lip, “You haven’t seen the look in her eyes the way I have. I can’t. Not now, at least.”_

_“Oliver, you-“_

_“Dammit! Why can’t people realize I lost my son too?! And at this point I feel I’ve lost my wife too!” The aggravation kicked in last minute and he stood up, “This isn’t easy on me but-but I need time. I’m allowed to grieve as well.” He glared at them, “Don’t teach me anything.” He walked past the two of them, making a beeline towards his room._

_Sighing to himself, he leaned against the wall of his room and wiped away the moisture in his eyes with the palm of his hands._

_How were they supposed to fix all of this?_

…

“Then Palmer showed up at your place and your calls stopped.” Oliver’s fingers twitched, “Your calls stopped.”

“You never answered them anyway,” Felicity chuckled dryly, “And Ray helped me, Oliver. He wanted us to get back together. Not calling you was something that we decided because that clearly wasn’t the answer. I wanted to fix it,” She fidgeted in her position, “I wanted to fix us.”

“With Palmer.”

He shouldn’t have said it but he couldn’t help it.

“Yes.” Felicity declared, “He’s my best friend, Oliver. I don’t think I need to explain myself anyway.” She turned her face away the last minute and Oliver sighed.

They were best friends. Period.

Yeah, Oliver got to that realization hours ago.

…

**April 2012**

_Oliver bit his lip as we waited anxiously for Felicity to pick up her phone._

_Is this how she felt when he didn’t answer her?_

_It had been three days since Felicity hadn’t called him. The fingers of his right hand twitched, his left foot moving up and down as he waited for something._

_Anything._

_Relief washed him over when someone did pick up the phone from the other end and his mouth parted open, words ready on his mouth when –_

_“Oliver! Hey.”_

_“Ray?” He frowned, pressing his ear against his phone, “Where is Felicity?”_

_“Uh, she is a bit busy at the moment.” Ray started, “I’ll make sure she calls you in one hour?”_

_“Su..sure?” Oliver was flustered._

_“Yeah, so how are y-“_

_Oliver hung up._

_What the hell was Felicity doing with Ray?_

_When did he come to Starling anyway?_

…

“I was with my psychiatrist, Oliver.” Felicity mumbled, still not looking at him. “Ray had asked me to take sessions.”

“What?” He looked surprised and Felicity let out a breathy chuckle, “When he came to Starling he saw me sulking. He saw how broken how I was and he asked me to see the therapist.” She looked at him, “Then he told me how I need to fix my relationship with you and needed to get my life back on track.”

“I didn’t know,” Oliver started hastily, “I didn-I would have come.”

“I came to tell you,” she said, suddenly interested in the hem of the shirt she was wearing, “But I heard you talking to Laurel. You told her how you didn’t want to see me that _way.”_

“I didn’t-“

“So, I decided it was better to not tell you about it. Not tell anyone about it. I didn’t want to lose you. I didn’t want to hurt you more than I already had.” Her lips former a thin line, “I just wanted to make everything better.”

Oliver bit his lip, “You should have told me.”

“You should have trusted me.”

“Felicity-“Oliver started, beginning to get up when Felicity raised her hand, “Just continue, Oliver.”

Oliver bit his lip as he slumped against the couch. His thumb rubbed his first two fingers and he felt his heart burn.

He sighed before speaking again.

…

**April 2012**

_Things went well for the next few days at least._

_Felicity had finally talked to Oliver who had sighed in relief when that happened._

_Yes, there was hope._

_Come to think of it, there’s always hope._

_They just needed time to sort themselves out._

_Oliver knocked on Felicity’s door, his hand holding the glass of red wine that he had bought on the way. His eyes flickered towards the words etched on the mahogany door._

_Oliver Queen and Felicity Queen._

_This was home._

_He grinned a little, waiting for her to open the door any minute._

_Felicity opened the door, her eyes widening, “Oliver?” A ghost of a smile graced her face for second and she blinked, “What are you doing here?” She ran a hand through her hair, moving it aside._

_“I just-I just wanted to spend some time with you.” He tilted his head sideways, “Is, is that okay..? I can come some other time.”_

_“No, no!” Felicity shook her head almost instantly, “It’s fine. Come on in.” She moved aside, her eyes bright behind her glasses, “I mean, this is your home. Our home, so you can come here whenever you wish you like, not that I’m forcing you or anything.” She rambled, “I mean, you’re always welcome here. This is our home.”_

_He entered the house, his grin widening ever so slightly. “You just missed Ray.” She told him before settling down on her couch, “Ray?” Oliver situated himself right beside her, “He was here?”_

_“Yup.” Felicity told him nonchalantly, “He hasn’t left Starling yet?”_

_Felicity frowned, “No. You haven’t even met him once, have you? He said he wanted to meet you.”_

_“He did?” Oliver echoed and Felicity shoved him, “What’s with the questions?” Her eyebrows rose in question before she caught the sight of the bottle in his hand. “Is that-“ Felicity started and when Oliver nodded, she got up from her sofa, “I’ll go get us two glasses.”_

_Oliver hummed in reply before taking off his shoes. His thoughts were going wayward as he settled himself on his couch._

_Ray was here._

_He wasn’t living here. Oliver was pretty sure of that. When Thea had left this place-Felicity had made her leave because she had studies to focus on, she had made it a habit to visit this place daily. His dad also usually stopped by, so if he really was staying here, someone would have informed him._

_It shouldn’t be that big of an issue. He was good friends with Ray but then again, he didn’t know what to think._

_Because for the first time he felt his heart burn at the thought of Ray and Felicity together._

_Was it just him or were they spending too much time with each other?_

_Just then Felicity’s phone rang and Oliver looked towards the kitchen only to see her fidgeting with the glasses. He sighed before picking up her phone and frowned when he noticed an unfamiliar name on the screen._

_Courtney._

_Who was she?_

_Sliding his thumb across the screen, he placed the device near his ear, “Hello?”_

_“Felicity!” He heard Ray on the other end and frowned, “So, tomorrow is final, right? And we don’t have to tell Oliver about this-“_

_“Oliver?”_

_Oliver looked up, his eyes meeting his wife’s and she moved her hand forward, wanting to fetch her phone, “Who is it?”_

_His response died on his lips as he heard Ray mutter that they Oliver shouldn’t know any of this. Felicity sat on the floor pressing her ear against the other side of her phone, wanting to listen before taking it from him and Oliver’s mouth parted open, “I’ll take that.” She grinned a little, “Need to tell these people that I shouldn’t be disturbed at the moment right?”_

_Oliver didn’t say a word as he watched Felicity stand up and make a beeline towards the kitchen where she was picking out stuff that he was sure meant a movie night._

_Pressing the front of his hand against his jeans, he frowned._

_Why had Felicity saved Ray’s name as Courtney on her phone?_

_Unless, she wanted to hide something_

_Hide what from Oliver?_

_His heart started beating faster as he stared at Felicity._

_What was she really hiding?_

….

“That is why I started linking Ray and you together. But that again was the therapy thing, wasn’t it?”

“Yes.”

“But I asked you if Ray had a girlfriend and you said no.” Oliver put his point forward and Felicity who had her poker face on, trying not to show any emotion muttered, “Because he didn’t. They had broken up at that time. Courtney was there for me as a friend. I had told you about her multiple times, Oliver. You just never listened.”

“No, I –“

“You just fucking assume.”

….

**May 2012**

_Oliver sat with Carter Bowen much to his chagrin. It was a sheer coincidence-nasty twist of fate that he met him while he was here to buy Felicity’s favourite milkshake and burger. He tapped his fingers on their table as he waited for someone to show up with his order and he hoped it was soon because he was about to bash his fucking face if he didn’t stop talking about Conner._

_“That baby could have been a model, you know. He was so pretty.”_

_Oliver closed his eyes, “Bowen. Can you just stop talking about him? I know all I need to know about my son.”_

_It was still painful._

_His son was an angel. He remembered the conversation he had with Felicity a few days ago. They were sitting in his nursery, Felicity’s head on his shoulder and they had talked about him. His habits, his ramblings, everything about him._

_It also had dawned on Oliver how much Felicity had changed. She had blamed herself again but she had told him that she would get past it. She would try to get past this guilt and live because that was what Conner would want._

_Would have wanted._

_To top it all, he felt like some of the burden was off his shoulder when he cried in Felicity’s arms and suddenly, in that moment the situation was reversed._

_It was good._

_And the conversation might have ended in tears but it was progress._

_Yeah, they were making progress._

_“I’m sorry,” Carter apologized and started shaking his head, “I’m being insensitive.”_

_You think?_

_“It’s just that I’ve been quite stressed lately. My wife cheated on me.”_

_“Yeah?” Oliver’s eyebrows, his fingers entwining on the table top. Well, Oliver wasn’t surprised. The leggy model he had married three months ago didn’t really seem the commitment type._

_“Yeah, I found out recently.”_

_“How did that happen?”_

“ _Yeah, I caught her texting her lover,” He air quoted the last word, “What about your wife?”_

_“I’m sorry?”_

_“Your wife? She just lost a child, Oliver,” Carter started, “You sure..she is not,” His voice turned a whisper, “Looking for comfort somewhere else?”_

_What the fuck._

_Oliver slammed his fist against the table as he stood up, “You know what, Carter? I’ve been really trying to hold myself back from punching you,” He leaned forward, his teeth gnashing together, “And I’m this close,” he brought the index finger of his right hand close to his thumb, “Mind your words about my wife.”_

_“Hey,” Carter raised his hands in surrender, “I love Felicity too but I’m just stating facts here, bud. Women going through grief try to look for another source of comfort. Well, since you..uh, left her.”_

_“I didn’t leave her.”_

_Carter shrugged._

_Oliver rolled his eyes before taking off._

_Women going through grief may try to look for another source of comfort._

…

“Carter Bowen?!” Felicity shrieked before picking up another showpiece of marble kept on the side table right beside her, “What the fuck were you thinking?!”

“I know it was stupid!” Oliver let out, “And I stood up for you. Of course I trusted you Felicity.” He muttered and Felicity scoffed, “I just..it had me thinking, alright?”

“What you should have done is talk to me.”

“I know!” Oliver started, “Believe me, I know.” He said softly, “It was stupid but-“

“You were stupid,” Felicity mumbled, “Like that makes everything better” she sniffed a little.

“Will you just hear me out?”

…

**May 2012**

_It was supposed to be a good day._

_Oliver had somewhat of a realization in the past few weeks where he had deemed himself as a moronic fool who was thinking too much._

_He was going to talk to Felicity._

_He trusted her and he was pretty sure nothing was fishy but he just needed to console himself. Diggle’s words echoed in his head where he had told him that he should just have a chat with Felicity, of course he had asked him in a false pretext. Claiming that it was his friends that was having marital problems rather than one and John had given a pretty good answer._

_To top it all, he would ask her if he could move in again. Yup, he still hadn’t moved in. The conversation had always been left off, the words never escaping either of their lips. He usually spent some time with her before taking a leave. The first night he dropped by, Felicity had asked him to stay if he wanted to only to receive a kiss on her forehead before he left. They still had needed to fix things then._

_Now, the case was different._

_He got inside ‘Frozen’, a small smile on his lips as he asked for a tub of mint chip. Tonight, he was going to spend the night at her-their house and they will talk about everything. Plus, he would ask her if he could stay there again._

_Tapping his foot anxiously, he waited for someone to hand him over a bag that would contain Felicity’s favourite ice cream when-_

_“So, this is the place?” Oliver frowned when he heard a familiar voice. He caught Felicity walking towards him through his peripheral vision and he was about to turn when another set of footsteps echoed._

_Ray._

_Oliver reacted instantly, moving his feet sideways so that he was away from the ‘two’ yet could keep an eye on them._

_“Yup.” He heard his wife mutter, “This place has the best ice creams ever.” Felicity grinned before ordering._

_Oliver frowned. Felicity had told him that she was going to meet Carly but here she was and the situation clearly was different._

_What the fuck was going on?_

_A certain sense of dread filled the pit of his stomach and he almost growled when he watched Ray’s hand land on Felicity’s waist._

_Did she lie again?_

_Women in grief try to look for another source of comfort._

_He tried to coax himself again, he wanted to believe that whatever was happening was just a sheer coincidence. A mere twist of fate. He reached for his cell phone and called Felicity, making sure he was inconspicuous._

_“Hello?”_

_His heart swelled when he saw a large grin form on her lips, “Hey.” He answered back with a smile of his own, “Where are you?”_

_“Uh, Frozen.” Felicity muttered, not sure where the conversation was heading._

_Oliver breathed a sigh of relief before closing his eyes._

_He was being stupid after all. Overthinking things again. He still would talk to her tonight, will clear some of the doubts that were still in his head. Asking about what she was ‘hiding’ but they had just won half of the battle without even realizing._

_“Alone?” He whispered._

_“With Ray.” Felicity declared and Oliver smiled wider if that was even possible, “But I thought you were meeting Carly today?”_

_He could see Felicity’s hesitation, “Yeah, I just met him on the way.”_

_She was lying._

_A feeling that was a cross between betrayal and dread filled his heart and he fidgeted, “You sure? Is there…something you want to tell me?”_

_“No.” He saw Felicity frown and then he realized that the first two fingers of her hand were crossed together, behind her back. She was lying._

_“Oh..okay.” He could stutter out the very last minute and Felicity mumbled goodbye before the two of them hung up._

_“You still haven’t told him?” He heard Ray ask._

_“No.”_

_Oliver’s heart broke in two._

_What in the world was going on with her? Since when did she become so secretive? He wanted answers but his heart told him, if he would actually discover the answers to them he would not be able to take them._

_“No, I want it to be a...” Oliver didn’t hear anything further because he made a beeline towards the exit door, his anger reaching his boiling point. His teeth were gnashed together, his teeth clenched. Two more minutes here and if he was sure he would punch Palmer’s fucking face._

_Meanwhile, Felicity tilted her head sideways as she watched a guy leave the parlour hastily, “Surprise.” She told Ray, “Surprise. Candles, lights everything. Then I’m going to tell him about everything and besides, we aren’t done with sessions yet. I just want it to be the next step you know? I don’t want to hide. So I will tell him. I just...i just wanted it to be perfect. I don’t want to ruin us again, Ray. What if he leaves again?”_

_Unbeknownst to her, Oliver was really one step closer to leaving._

….

“You lied. I talked to Carly that day. You _lied.”_

“I had a session, Oliver. You could have asked. _Asked._ Once. Once!” she shouted the last word on the top of her voice.  “You never asked. Miscommunication leads to misunderstandings, Oliver,” her voice broke as she spoke the last sentence.

“You should have told me.” He mumbled softly, his voice wavering, “You should have.”

“I was afraid you’ll leave again. Afraid that you’ll see the old Felicity and leave again,” she closed her eyes, “But in the end you left me anyway, didn’t you?”

…

**May 2012**

_Oliver anxiously waited for the doctor to tell him anything. He remembered how scared he was when he found Felicity lying on the ground._

_It had only been two months since Conner’s death and they were back in a hospital._

_Hospital._

_Oliver could barely control his tears at bay. He never really realized how much he had come to hate this place. Coming to this place made him feel like he was one step closer to death._

_And he might lose Felicity the way he lost Conner._

_No._

_God won’t be so cruel, would he? He wouldn’t take Felicity away from him. Not after what he did to his baby._

_He wouldn’t, would he?_

_He never really prayed. The first time he prayed or well, the first time after a long time he prayed was when he discovered that Felicity and Conner were in an accident. He could swore he had stopped breathing in that one second._

_He had lost half of his family._

_He wasn’t about to lose the other half._

_He leaned against the chair, murmuring a prayer when he heard footsteps approaching him. He looked up only to see Ray staring at him and his fists clenched, “What are you doing here?” he sniped out, “I, uh, went to QC only to find out that she was here.” He pointed towards the room and Oliver gritted his teeth. His family did not know of this and he did?_

_“What happe-“_

_The doctor decided to walk out the room Felicity was in before smiling at the two men, “She’s fine. It’s just exhaustion.”_

_Oliver heaved a sigh of relief at that, “Is she…is there anything we need to take care of?” His fingers twitched, he was really worried about her._

_The doctor nodded a little, “You’re the husband, right?” Oliver nodded, “And you?”_

_“I’m her best friend,” Ray spoke and the doctor nodded his head in acknowledgement._

_“She seems to be really tired. How many hours does she sleep in a day?”_

_“Five to six maybe,” Before Oliver could even open his mouth Ray had answered. He knew this because her psychiatrist had talked to him to and he was aware about these little things._

_So was Oliver._

_After all, he was her husband._

_“She needs more rest. Is she on any medications? Maybe it could be a side effect to one.”_

_“No.” Oliver started but Ray shook his head, “She was on antidepressants for a little while. Now she has stopped taking it.”_

_Oliver gaped._

_He never knew any of it. She was on antidepressants? A small part of him was burning with jealousy, noticing the fact that how Palmer knew her more than him while the other part of him was filled up with concern for her._

_But how come Felicity didn’t tell him?_

_How come…Palmer knew?_

_Like he wasn’t already feeling afraid about the fact that Felicity might be cheating._

_“And body weaknesses?”_

_“She gets dehydrated easily.”_

_Oliver didn’t know that either._

_Is there anything about Felicity that Ray didn’t know?_

_He was her husband and Ray? He was just her best friend. Wasn’t he supposed to know more about this?_

_How did he not?_

_Or better yet, how come Ray did?_

_It was a random moment but in that particular moment Oliver Queen had never felt more inferior to Ray Palmer._

_How he should have been her husband and how Oliver should…never have been a part of it._

_The doctor nodded, “I’ll write her a prescription accordingly. You both can meet her now.”_

_Oliver huffed before taking a step back._

_“You should go first.” Ray uttered and Oliver laughed a little, his chuckle was void of emotion before patting his shoulder and turning around, “You go. Seems like you know her better than me anyway.”_

….

“I thought I lost you,” Oliver muttered, “But I still needed answers so I thought I would not jump to conclusions.”

Felicity snorted through her tears.

“But you did.”

_He did._

….

**May 2012**

_Oliver smiled a little as he got out of Verdant. Felicity had asked him to meet her at their place tomorrow for a date. (Oliver never really had asked her about the moving in part) His heart had soared in his chest at the thought of it. The previous instances were still crisp in his mind but he was sure there was a plausible explanation to it._

_He trusted Felicity._

_Come to think of it, he had lost most of his trust and had it not been her proposal to him, nothing would have restored it._

_There was hope._

_She was his hope._

_Stepping out of his club, he headed towards his bike when he fidgeted through the pocket of jeans looking for his keys ad groaned when he realized he had left them back at the club._

_Making an about turn, he climbed up the three stairs that led him to his club. Entering the club, he made a beeline towards the corner of the bar, where Felicity and he were talking minutes ago. Picking up his keys that were lying on it, he started to make his way back to his bike._

_Voices reached his ear and he turned his head right finding himself staring at Felicity and Ray. His feet backtracked almost all of a sudden, trying to hide himself in the best way possible, “So, you asked him?”_

_“Yes.” Oliver word Felicity speak and his eyebrows furrowed, “So, tomorrow night then. You’re going to tell him then?”_

_“I’ll tell him everything,” He heard her say._

_He breath hitched, tell him what?_

_That she was with Ray?_

_“And then what?”_

_“I was thinking about leaving Starling,” His wife muttered, “This place is great but I think we need a new start. Just for a little while away from all of this.”_

_“That sounds nice.”_

_He almost tripped as he moved back, shock evident of on his event. The past events started reeling back in his mind and he found himself chuckling at his own stupidity._

_Of course she was cheating on him with Ray._

_That is why she asked her for a date today._

_Because she wanted to reveal that she was with Ray._

_Tears threatened to fall down his cheeks. All his doubts came to life._

_How she was hiding something._

_How Ray knew her better than anyone else._

_How she lied to him._

_How she was planning to tell him something and then she would leave him to go to Central City._

_Of course, she would leave him._

_He gritted his teeth in agitation, his fists clenching. He was about to turn and head towards the two of them._

_He was finally going to bash Palmer._

_Oh, he was going to beat him to pulp._

_His gaze flickered towards the area and he realize that the two had already left._

_He growled under his breath before making his way towards his bike. He was flustered, his hands shaking as he put the key in ignition._

_And then he reacted._

_He pushed the bike causing it to land on the ground with a thump. His jaw locked tightly and he found himself crouching down, sitting near the bike._

_Why did she do this to him?_

_Did she not love him?_

_Was it because of Conner? The grief might have been too much but he was his son too. He didn’t fall into someone else’s arm, why did she?_

_“Oliver?” Thea sounded worried as she reached her brother._

_Oliver didn’t say a word, his hands hiding his face as he finally let himself go. Tears dripped down his cheeks as the realization dawned on him._

_Felicity had lost Conner._

_Maybe that is why she turned to Ray for comfort._

_But Oliver had lost Conner too._

_And now…he lost Felicity as well._

….

“I didn’t know what to do,” Oliver started, his eyes moist, “I thought I lost you. I got drunk that night.” He laughed a little, “I thought maybe it would help with the pain. When I went back to the mansion that day, I looked for the divorce papers that mom had gotten us when I left you… I-I signed them.”

“You didn’t even think twice.” She murmured, her nose red, “You just-you didn’t trust me one bit, did you?” She tilted her head sideways, “Not one bit.”

“I-“

“It was a surprise.” Felicity didn’t let him speak, “I wanted to tell you that I was done with the sessions. The psychiatrist told me that-I, I needed my _husband._ I was ready to talk about Conner, to _visit_ him. I was ready to do anything to be with you,” her voice cracked, “I wanted to-wanted to leave Starling with _you_. I thought the two of us needed a fresh beginning… I just wanted us together.”

She sniffed, “But look at our fate?” she tried to smile, “We both lost each other either way.”

Oliver didn’t know what to say. A lone tear dripped down his cheek too.

She wanted it to be special and what did he do?

“I waited for you to show up. For five hours, I waited and then I found the divorce papers,” she bit her lip, “I found the papers. I thought we’ll get back together, properly. Living under the same roof, back like before. But--” her voice trailed off and Oliver knew what was coming next. He closed his eyes, “I found out the papers. And then, I _saw_ you.”

Oliver’s face crumbled, “Do you even remember our last conversation, Oliver?”

Of course he did.

It made him want to crawl in a hole and die. He remembered  some of the words he spoke that day and he had felt regret piling inside of him later on but when he learned how Felicity and Ray had left for Central City he had started telling himself that what he said might be mean and meaningless-but she deserved it.

Except she didn’t.

_She didn’t._

….

**May 2012**

_Felicity made a dash towards the reception wanting to know where Oliver was. The divorce papers were folded to form a roll which she had been clutching in her hand rather tightly._

_To say she was shocked would be an understatement. She had been waiting for Oliver to show up at their place but he didn’t show up. To top it, she finally realized that there was a manila envelope right underneath her door and when she had opened, tears had welled up in her eyes before anger took over._

_She was going to kill Oliver._

_She had tried contacting him for the umpteenth time that day when she realized that situation was not to be taken lightly. She had to talk to him face to face. She had tried calling Tommy and Thea but no one picked up their phone. Heck, not even John. So, she tracked his GPS and was surprised to see that he was staying at a hotel._

_She felt her stomach drop._

_Hotel?_

_So, she was here. She had blown all the candles out, had gotten rid of the food she had cooked for him and had made her way towards the said hotel._

_“Oliver Queen?” She spoke the name out and the receptionist moved her fingers across the keyboard and hummed in reply, “He is staying here. May I know who are you?”_

_“I’m his wife.” She tapped her fingers against the table, “Can you please tell me his room number?”_

_“I’m sorry, Mrs. Queen. We haven’t received any information from Mr. Queen-“_

_“Listen, I’m in a hurry. I need to talk to my husband.”_

_“Ma’am, I can-“_

_“Please.” Felicity pleaded, her hand losing its grip on the divorce papers, “I need to talk to him. It’s urgent.”_

_“I can’-“_

_“Please.” Felicity murmured again, biting her lip. Her eyes were wide and moist, God she really needed to meet him._

_“Room 203.” She told her quietly, “Don’t tell anyone about this.”_

_Felicity smiled weakly, “Don’t worry, I won’t.” She hastily made her way towards the elevator, “Thank you!”_

_She was going to talk to him._

…

_She stood in front the door. The number 203 were etched on it in golden. She took a deep breath before fisting her hand and knocking on it. Stepping back, she waited for the door to open, her mind trying to formulate words._

_What will she say?_

_Why did he sign the divorce papers?_

_A small part of still believed that it must all be a misunderstanding. Things were going well. They were spending time together, they were talking about Conner-they loved each other. She pressed her hand against the corner of her eyes and wiped away the moisture there._

_How can things go so wrong?_

_She was angry._

_She was emotional._

_And she would sure as hell planning on beating Oliver with the same roll of paper he had signed god knows how many hours ago._

_She was going to kill him._

_Slaughter him._

_The door opened the next second and she was greeted by a sight she wasn’t prepared for._

_A girl stood on the threshold of room, wearing a shirt._

_A gorgeous girl in a shirt._

_Just a shirt._

_Oliver’s shirt._

_Her face fell in a second and she opened her mouth, wanting to say something when Oliver popped in behind the said woman who was looking at her, probably judging her with those big beady eyes of hers._

_“Oliver?” She gasped, her voice was quiet having lost the ability to speak out loudly._

_“Felicity! Hey!” He greeted her with a smile and Felicity was suddenly aware of the fact that he was drunk, “Come on in!” He gestured towards his room, stepping aside ever so slightly to allow her in._

_“What is going on here?” Felicity gritted out through her clenched teeth although eyes depicted some other story, tears were threatening to fall but she’ll be damned if she let them._

_“What do you think-“The woman decided to speak and Felicity glared at her, “I wasn’t talking to you. I’m here for my husband.”_

_“Husband?” Her eyebrow quirked up as she looked at Oliver, “You told me you divorced her.”_

_“I did.” Oliver laughed, moving his hand in the air where his wedding ring was present once and Felicity felt her heart break in two. The nonchalant expression on his face made her want to puke her guts out. “How can you be this way? How can you do this?”_

_“How can I do this?” Oliver’s eyes widened as he stared at her, “Just the way you did it.” Felicity frowned, the tears finally went down her cheeks, “I did what?”_

_“Just the way you ruined my life.” He uttered out, “Just the way you took away my son. The way it was so easy for you.”_

_Felicity’s face shattered at the name of late son, “Oliver, you can-can’t do this to us. I won’t let you.”_

_“I believe he just did.” The woman grinned and Felicity’s anger reached her peak. Her hand moved forward as she pushed her in, “I’m not talking to you bitch!” She yelled suddenly, the onslaught of emotions being too much, “What the fuck is wrong with you, Oliver?! I tried everything and-“_

_“Don’t talk to her that way.” Oliver pushed the young girl behind her back and Felicity’s eyebrows furrowed, “You’re going to support her?!”_

_“Well, she didn’t exactly ruin my life did she?”_

_“But all I wanted was to fix this relationship!” she shouted before throwing the divorce paper on the ground, “I just wanted to fix it, Goddammit! And you cheated on me?!”_

_“Well, it was pretty easy.” Oliver smirked, “I mean, getting over you. What is it that you’ve ever done for me, anyway? You took my son away, Felicity. You left me, just like the others,” he scoffed, “You were after my money, weren’t you?” His words were slurry yet the meaning was crisp._

_Felicity was speechless for a few seconds, Oliver’s words playing in her mind._

_You took my son away._

_You were after my money._

_She was crumbling on the inside._

_She wanted to fix her relationship with this man? He clearly didn’t give a damn about her and she wanted to fix this?_

_“How could you even think that?”_

_Oliver laughed before glaring at her, “You were right, Felicity. You don’t deserve either of us. You are just a fucking bitch.”_

_“Fuck you, Oliver.” Felicity spat at him, “You are such a bastard.” God, she did not want to cry for him. Why was she crying for him?!_

_“Say whatever you want, Felicity. It’s you who destroyed this relationship. Who destroyed me.”_

_You don’t deserve either of us._

_And suddenly, the old insecurities returned._

_All this while, she had been doing all of this so that they can be happy together. So that they can get past this._

_But in reality, they were past nothing._

_Old wounds still existed and nothing-no one could heal them._

_Not even her._

_Not even him._

_Maybe she didn’t deserve Oliver because she took away Conner._

_Maybe God was making her pay for taking away a precious angel._

_She deserved this, didn’t she?_

_“I wish-I wish it was you that had died that night.”_

_Felicity tripped back, losing her footing. His words seemed to have slap her right across her face and she bit her lip, her hands landing limp by her side. “Wh-“_

_“Whatever. You can do whatever you want.” Oliver rolled his eyes, “You’re not my concern anymore. You mean nothing to me.” He spat his final words at her._

_The door closed and Felicity tumbled backward, tears pouring down her cheeks._

_I wish it was you that had died that night._

_“I wish that every day, Oliver, “Felicity murmured to herself as she finally collapsed, right in the middle of the hallway, “It’s what I wish for every day.”_

_And in that moment Felicity Queen had decided._

_She would divorce him._

_Because despite the pangs that she felt in her heart as the realization dawned on her, something else did too._

_All that she had done was for nothing._

_She had lost him either way._

_And she didn’t deserve him for killing Conner._

_And he didn’t deserve her after what he just did to her._

_They were done._

….

_The next day Felicity left for Central City._

_And Oliver had felt his heart hurt as he realized that she had left with Ray and he was right all along._

…

“All this while I thought you left me because you blamed me for Conner’s death,” Felicity declared, rubbing her cheeks hastily, “I thought you left me because you thought I ruined us.”

“Felicity,” Oliver started and Felicity blinked, she hadn’t realized that he had gotten up from his position and was now crouching front of her, “I never blamed you for Conner’s death.”

“Could have fooled me” she muttered, turning her gaze away.

“Hey look at me,” Oliver mumbled, his hands reaching for her face and she looked at his eyes for one second, noticing the moisture present there too before swatting his hand away, “Don’t touch me.”

Now that the conversation had ended, reality was staring at their faces.

And it _pierced_ Oliver’s heart.

To realize how much of big mistake he had made.

_Blunder._

“I deserve that,” He mumbled and Felicity didn’t look at him, “I don’t remember much of the conversation…we-we had that night, Felicity. I never blamed you for Conner’s death. _I never did.”_

“Well, you did manage to say a lot of things anyway.” Felicity huffed before getting up, pushing Oliver away in the process, “You made me hate myself, Oliver. I hated myself but what I should have done was _hate_ you.”

Oliver didn’t say anything. He didn’t know what he should be saying.

Three years.

Almost three fucking years where he had hated this woman.

The love of his life.

Who he had let go, just on the basis of something that his mind had built up.

“Why didn’t you talk to me? You could have asked once,” she murmured, pressing her hands on the top of her hand, “Once and I would have told _everything._ Instead, you assumed that I was with Ray, Oliver, really?” her fingers twitched, “You never trusted me, you should have fucking trusted me!”

“I know! I know, alright!” Oliver stood up from his position, “I was such an asshole, I know. I should have talked-I should have trusted you, I know.” He spoke in one breath, “I made mistakes. I was messed up,” His fingers twitched, his blue eyes looking anywhere but her.

He didn’t know how to face her.

“You said those words.”

“I never meant them,” He pleaded, “I didn’t even remember half of them, Felicity. I was drunk and I fucked up-“

“Drunk words are sober thoughts!”

“Not always. I was confused, I was _hurt.”_ He uttered, “I just wanted-“

“You wished that it was I who had died that day.” She stage whispered, her voice shaking, “I wish that every day, Oliver. Everyday. It should have been my funeral that day, not Conner’s.”

“Don’t talk like that,” Felicity snorted at that and a second later, Oliver was standing in front of her, his hands pressed against her arms, “Don’t talk like that.”

“Don’t touch-“ Felicity fidgeted.

“Listen to me, alright? I was a douche, a fucking moron, but I never meant it.” His face was marred with tear tracks, “I never meant it. I was devastated at the mere thought of losing you. Don’t-“ He took a deep breath, “I don’t want to lose you.”

“Except you did.” Felicity murmured, “You did.”

“I know, I know.” Oliver told her, desperation lacing his tone. “Did you try to commit suicide?”

“So what if I did?  It’s not like you cared, did you?”

“Of course, I did!”

“You have a funny way of showing it.”

“ _Why?”_  

Felicity might be going through grief but he knew that she always had been strong. What had made her feel so defeated that she even thought of suicide.

“He has the audacity to ask why,” She laughed through her tears. Sometimes Oliver could be so obtuse, “I lost both of you. I just needed to-I just needed to see him once. He was my hope, Oliver. You were my hope but you crushed my heart.” She paused, taking in a breath, “I just wanted to feel _._ Feel something, anything. I was _numb_. I overdosed on sleeping pills,” She sniffed, “I thought you won’t care anyw-“

“I care what happens to you. I have always cared.” Oliver leaned in closer, “I was hurt because I cared dammit!” He cupped her wet cheeks, “I loved you”. He stated and Felicity sniffed, not meeting his eyes, “No, you didn’t. Trust is the foundation of love, Oliver. You should have trusted me. You should have talked to me.”

“I know,” Oliver muttered and before Felicity could realize his forehead was pressed against hers, their hands joined in the middle. Their eyes were closed and Felicity was aware of the fact that Oliver was crying, “I-I made mistakes. But, but you don’t have to pay for them. Conner’s death,” Felicity’s breath hitched, “It wasn’t your fault. Killing yourself was not the answer. Do you-do you realize…what would have happened to me if I would have found out?” He let out a small whimper, “I lost my son and then you-I would have lost myself.”

“But you lost me either way, Oliver.” Felicity murmured, her eyes opening and suddenly she moved away. Theirs hands separated ever so slowly and Oliver felt that he was losing her all over again, “I can’t forgive you for that, I can’t.” Felicity murmured, shaking her head adamantly as she situated herself on the couch, “I won’t.”

“I don’t deserve forgiveness.” Oliver confessed.

He did not.

The realization was true and full of agony but he deserved it. His impulsiveness had led to his downfall. Would it be the same way if the tables were turned and it was Felicity who had her doubts?

No.

Felicity would have trusted him.

Come to think of it, Oliver had committed the same sin he thought Felicity had done.

If there was any place out there worse than hell, he deserved it.

He _deserved_ it.

Oliver crouched down in front of Felicity. He was desperate, yes he was. Ever since she had come back to Starling City, Oliver had only seen her hatred but tonight, something else burned in her eyes.

It was disappointment.

And it was time he fixed it.

“These things are not easy to forgive.” Oliver started, his hands moving towards his trying to wipe away the tears, “And I don’t even deserve an ounce of it. But I’m going to ask for it anyway.” He tried to laugh it off, “I deserve hell. I deserve everything but once, can we...fix this somehow?”

“No.”

The response was sudden and Oliver felt his world crumbling. Is this how she felt when he had rebuked her?

“I can’t,” she shook her head.  “Do you know before leaving Starling, dad called me? I didn’t reveal anything to him. Grammy doesn’t know either. I don’t know if you told them about our last encounter or not,”

His dad knew, hell he even knew that Ray was helping Felicity in dealing with Conner’s death. He had tried telling her all those time but he had refused to listen to him. His Grammy however, wasn’t aware of the last incident between them. All she was aware about was Oliver believed Felicity had cheated on with Ray.

Believed.

Why had Oliver never reached for conclusions?

“I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to talk to anyone,” She closed her eyes, a thing she did when she was in pain, “Because I didn’t want to fix it. I was done. Even if you hadn’t blamed me for Conner’s death, I was done.  I didn’t want to see your face which is why I didn’t talk to anyone.”

“I deserved that.”

“You deserve a lot more that,” Felicity declared, “You had your family. I had no one & I had Ray helping me as a friend,” she murmured, “And you thought…I cheated? What about all those time when I found you talking to Laurel, alone? When you were living at Tommy’s and Laurel used to spend time there. I never even once thought about you cheating on me because I thought I _knew_ you.”

“But you didn’t know me,” she stated and stood up, not wanting to look in his eyes. They were full of intense emotions and she was afraid she’ll become weak, “Laurel had been your girlfriend for almost four years, Oliver. Then you cheated on her with Sara. Despite that I never judged you Oliver. I never doubted then how could you do that to me? _How could you?”_

Oliver had found himself speechless for the umpteenth time that night.

How could he? He never really realize how all these years, she had imposed her trust in him. He had a reputation before but she was the first woman to look past that, isn’t that one of reasons why he fell in love with her?

So, why couldn’t it be two ways?

Why couldn’t he trust her like she did?

“I-I was stupid, I was irrational-but we can figure something out-“

He didn’t want to lose Felicity. He just got her back after so many years. He won’t make the same mistake twice; he wouldn’t let her go this time

 “Relationships don’t change overnight, Oliver. They can’t” she whispered.  “Besides, we don’t even have a relationship. Relationships are based on trust. You didn’t trust me then and I don’t trust you now.”

“No, something is there,” Oliver sniped out all of a sudden, “I was hurt because I cared. I still do-I want us. I want this-“ He gestured between the two of them, “Whatever it is I want it to be there.”

There, he had had admitted it to himself.

Even if they hadn’t had this conversation, he would want her to be there with him.

Because something had _changed._

It had.

He didn’t want to let her go.

“No Oliver whatever it was between us, it’s over. It has been for a while. We’re done,” she wiped her tears, “Get out.”

She was done with him.

“Felicit-“

“Get out.”

“Will you just listen to me once?! Can’t we fix this somehow?”

“Fix this,” Felicity stood right in front of his face, “ _Fix this how?_ Did you forgive me? What if I had really screwed Ray, then what? Would you have forgiven me?” She looked straight in his eyes, “You didn’t forgive me for the exact same mistake that you made, Oliver. How am I supposed to forgive you?”

Oliver flinched.

_How was she supposed to forgive him?_

“Your family called me words. They jumped to conclusions and you never stood up for me. You know what’s worse, Oliver?” she looked at him with tears in her eyes, “That I never expected you too.” She moved back distancing herself from him. “This guy standing in front of me isn’t my Oliver. The one I had fallen madly in love with,” she sniffled. “You are someone else. I don’t trust you and I don’t know you.”

She tried to ignore Oliver’s broken expression.

“You called me your leftover,” Oliver shook his head adamantly; “You’re a coward Oliver. You know why because I tried. I fought for us while you betrayed. You didn’t leave me, Oliver.” she whispered, trying to keep her tears at bay.

_“You lost me.”_

Feeling weak in the knees, they say. It’s what happens when something becomes too overwhelming---that’s exactly what happened with Oliver. His knees _crumbled._ He had never been in this much pain—

Not even the day he _lost_ her.

 Felicity took a step back, her own heart breaking at the sight of it. She pressed a hand against her mouth before turning around and walking out of the suite and Oliver let out a broken roar.

_You lost me._

They say that the irony of life is, that you realize the value of the thing you love the most is when you lose them.

He had loved her.

And he had lost her.

And the worst part?

_He didn’t realize what he had lost until now._

….

Felicity leaned against the railing of the bridge where she had come to clear her head. Staring at the waves ahead of her, she fidgeted with her hands, her lower lip tucked between her teeth as she tried to contain her sobs.

But then she gave into the urge to cry and scream and let go of all the pain and hurt. Then she cried.

She cried for her son.

Her husband

Her lost family

Her future

She lost so much because her husband didn’t trust her.

She _hated_ Oliver Queen.

She _hated_ him so much.

…

**November 2012**

_Felicity sighed as she settled herself on the table, dropping her bag on it. A waiter suddenly appeared in front of her and she managed a small grin at him, “Two black coffees with extra su-“ she stopped all of a sudden realizing that she was the only one here and her mouth parted open in surprise, her fingers curling ever so slightly._

**_“Two black coffees with extra sugar coming up for the couple,” Oliver shoved the foam cup in her hand, a bright smile on his face._ **

**_“Thank you,” Felicity grinned back._ **

_“Uh, I’ll have a cappuccino,” She mumbled to the waiter, “Low sugar,” she told him and the waiter nodded before heading back towards the counter._

**_“How do people like cappuccino, I find it disgusting to be honest,” Oliver wrinkled his nose and Felicity whacked his arm, “Coffee is coffee, Oliver.” She laughed, “It tastes delicious, no matter what.”_ **

**_“You don’t like cappuccino either, do you?”_ **

**_“No, I don’t.”_ **

_Felicity tried to smile her best when the waiter brought the cup of coffee for her. Her lips curled up ever so slightly on the outside._

_But on the inside, her heart was breaking._

….

**November 2012**

_Oliver waited for his dad to come home any moment. His fingers twitched, the anxiety kicking in._

_He was finally doing this._

**_“I think you should give it a try to,” Felicity told him as the two of them laid in their bed._ **

**_“Really, you think so?” Oliver blubbered out._ **

**_“Yeah, I mean. You are his son after all. And you handled Verdant really well, so I think you would be able to handle QC too.” Felicity elaborated, “I think you’ll do great.”_ **

**_“Yeah?” He smiled at her and Felicity smiled before nuzzling her face in his bare chest and dropping a kiss there, “Now let me sleep. I’m really tired.”_ **

**_“And sore.”_ **

**_“Shut up,” She grinned before whacking him across his chest. His chest rumbled with laughter and he found himself thinking about it._ **

**_CEO._ **

**_Maybe he could actually be-_ **

**_“Think over it tomorrow, Oliver. Not now.”_ **

**_Oliver smiled a little, “I’m not-“_ **

**_“Oliver.”_ **

**_“Fine,” He sighed, “I’m sleeping. I’m in a coma, happy?” He tried to grin and Felicity whacked her fist against his chest, “Ow!” He rubbed his chest._ **

**_Just then a shrill cry echoed across the baby monitor and Felicity groaned, “Oliver.”_ **

**_“I’m in a coma, remember?”_ **

**“ _Oliver.”_**

**_“Fine,” Oliver got up before wearing his sweat pants and heading towards Conner’s room._ **

**_Father._ **

**_Husband._ **

**_CEO._ **

**_He didn’t really mind that._ **

**_Especially since Felicity trusted him._ **

**_With her?_ **

**_Anything._ **

_Lost in his own thoughts, he didn’t realize that his father was looking at him, his gaze questioning yet hard. He knew that it was because he was stressed because they weren’t aware of Felicity’s whereabouts and Oliver-_

_Well, he hated to think about her._

_“Dad, I want to be the CEO.”_

_He would do this._

_Oliver Queen_

_CEO._

_He didn’t really mind that._

_But now it would be without her._

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys stick around! 
> 
> Thanks for reading! :)
> 
> P.S. Special shout out to Dani and Baz for helping me through this site! x


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